𝓐𝓹𝓻𝓲𝓬𝓲𝓽𝔂

( ｎ) ~ The warmth of the sun in the winter.

The comfort in the most deadly storms.

Your grounding factor in the hardest of tides of fate.

ᎠᎬᏉᎨ ᏕᏬᏰᎻᎯᎠᏒᎯ

The mother of one of the greatest warriors, Abhimanyu, the wife of one of the greatest archers Mahanayak Arjun, the sister of the great Hari Narayan Shree Krishn and Shesh Naag swaroop Balram.

But above all this, she was, but a child, a girl with a heart of gold and compassion for all those who deserved it, what would it be, to see the life she lived, through her own eyes.

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The morning after her son's death proved to be one of the hardest things Subhadra had to do.

Falling asleep just next to Uttara's bed, caring for her and her unborn child had given Devi Subhadra a purpose, a way to overcome the grief. But the war wasn't over. She had to get up, go through the motions, now just practiced movement of her muscles for the life was sucked out of her the moment she saw her son being carried in the arms of her brother in-law Yudhishthir, the Samrat.

Her rage was unimaginable as she saw them apologise to her Arya. How dare they stand there and say they couldn't do anything, she and her husband gave his responsibility to them. They were his elders! His caregivers , Tatshree and Kakashree's. But no one could stand in the way of Niyati. She would know, she herself helped carry out the birth of her Jyeshth brothers.

" Raajkumari, please come out for the tilak. " A dasi called as her eyes finally moved away from the spot on the ground, where she remembered her son standing as he argued with her a few days ago.

" Mata, I'll be fine! You and Uttara worry too much. I am your son mata, I am my father's son. I am Jyesth mata Panchali's son. I will be fine. " He promised her, enclosing his fist over her arms.

" But putr, there is nothing wrong in having sweetened curd before you leave. Please do it? " She asked, before looking up at him, " For me? " She whispered and he sighed, when a voice interrupted them.

" You should listen to the pleas of your mother Abhimanyu. She is just looking after you. In her own way. Your agreement in going along with her wishes warms her heart and will give you a reassurance too." His father said, walking into the room.

Subhadra turned around to see her husband, ready in battle armour. He was still just as handsome as he was when they married, strong and confident. His eyes showed pure love for their family, his family.

" See, even pitashree agrees. Please Arya." Uttara said, smiling at her husband's comical sigh before he opened his mouth and allowed the sweet blessing of the sweetened curd.

" Thank you my dear son. You are my Apricity. " Subhadra whispered to him as she blessed him for the day.

" Subhadra, do Arya's tilak please. " Panchali rasped from beside her, as she stood before her husband. Panchali's eyes unfocused in the grief of her son.

Red eyes. They mirrored her own as she held the thali in shaky hands.

Slowly, Subhadra looked up at him through watery lashes. She moved up from his shoulders, tense as they were, they seemed to have gained just enough courage to avenge his son's death, before dropping to the ground as dead organs, nothing more than skin, flesh and bone.

His jaw was set tight, as if preventing himself from breaking down into tears yet again and his eyes. His eyes were cold, distant. They held the fury of every father's pain. But most of all. They held the love that she saw in her son's. She saw the love he held for his son, but now, she could also see the love her son held for his father, because those were the eyes with which her son saw the world. Sharp dark eyes, reflecting the truth of the universe. Which is why, even as her hand was just a hair's breadth away from his forehead, she dropped it.

" I cannot do this. " She whispered, running away, even as she heard calls of her name, she couldn't look into those eyes, the ones that reflected her son's youth in them, her son's love. She could not. She could not.

" Bhadre! Subhadra? " Her brother called, as she ran, through the tents towards the streams and running nook of the rivers.

She sat down, eyes glassy as her breath caught in her throat. Tears bubbled in her throat as she let out a blood curdling scream. The nearby birds left their nests, while animals were startled away as she weeped for the loss of her son.

Even though he had been born and raised now for sixteen years, her hand caught on her stomach, where the emptiness ate her alive as she held on, head bent in agony.

Her heart, finally able to grieve would not allow her to rest as she cried for her son, her apricity.

" Bhadre. " Came a soft voice, one which would usually solve all the problems in the world. But today it was only the target of her anger and pain.

" You! You knew this would happen! " She screamed,hitting him as he tried to calm her down. It may be uncalled for, it may be considered foolish for the others, because why would she blame her brother for her son's death, but it was a heart of a mother that was wounded. A heart that shattered with each arrow that pierced his body and each blow to his beautiful soul shattering her resolve.

"Bhadre, calm yourself. Your son is one of the greatest warriors alive. I loved him
too-" He tried when she wrenched his hand off her shoulders.

" Evidently not as much as a mother bhratashree! I watched him as a baby! I watched that beautiful face in the one that lies there, unbreathing and he never will! I will never see his smile again, never see the love he holds for me and his father in his eyes. Never see his joy on learning about him becoming a father. I lost him! " She cried, falling to her knees as she held herself close, as if in a foetal position.

" Bhadre, I understand. But death is not the end, you must be strong. Your husband is going today to fight for his son. You cannot discredit his valour by grieving his death so. You must become the support that you need. You must be their apricity, as your son was yours. " He whispered to her as he enveloped her in a hug.

Her cries increased tenfold as she held on to him, nearly drawing blood where she clutched on to his arms.

Time might truly have stood still for this mother to grieve, for when she returned, their was a new fire in her eyes.

Her husband, still red eyes spotted her coming and had to refrain from letting his lips quiver at her bravery, attempting to hold his own as well.

Walking up to him, she raised her hands to apply the tilak and then looked him dead in the eyes.

"Our son was a great warrior. His valour and effort will be remembered till the end of time by all. But today, today I ask you not to be mahanayak Arjun, but Abhimanyu's father. You must avenge his death. So that we may be at peace. Eventually, but at peace. " She said boldly, voice full of love.

He nodded his head before closing his eyes once, a lone tear that made out of his eyes glided down his fair face as it dropped to the ground.

" I swear to you Subhadra. They will regret ever raising their eyes to challenge Abhimanu's father. They will regret inviting their own deaths as I dance over their sinned souls. " He promised her, raising one shaky arm to her head. She resisted a sob at his gesture, before smiling, the first of many towards the path of healing.

" Apricity. You are my new apricity. " Arjun said to her, even as she bent her head low, now unable to control her tears.

" Vijayi bhav. " Mata Kunti blessed as she watched her son, eyes blazing.

Today, both parents were not humans. They were forms of fire who would annihilate any who had dared to hurt their son.

As she returned back, she walked into the room, falling asleep on the bed, the exhaustion finally rendering her physically unable to think, breathe or act, to the point where a dasi, entering her room had to check if she was in fact alive.

She should have disaproved her conclusion, for Subhadra was not alive, just surviving. Breathing but not living.

After all, what else is a mother to do when she outlives her child?