• • • • •

I DID NOT SEE HIM COMING. His striking presence stunned me. The tempestuous brown globes of his eyes were still as he distinguished my image beyond the grotesque form my body took. I was trapped inside an animal dissimilar to my once beloved half.

In his hand was a silver bladed lance pointed at my wolf. She was in danger, stepping one paw back, but I was beyond relieved. Though silver was provoking fear to settle inside both of our minds, I remained lax, simply pushing it back as I knew he would not harm us.

My shield was never detrimental.

'Hal!'

"Please don't move, milady. Focus more on controlling your body." He said, sounding palliative. It took me a second to ignore the questions running through my system. I had to get back to my true form.

Hal pushed the lance forward, its spike mere inches from the beast's neck. She stepped back, detaining the growl from hurling out of her throat.

"Shift." Hal ordered, driving the beast more insane. I could see her fear and ire combining into a mixture of red and gray.

"Shift." Hal repeated.

The beast's heart hammered against her chest. She was an alpha and a man of lower rank could never make her submit. Clearly, I knew, she would rather rot in hell than be humiliated by acquiescing. She was as stubborn as I. But I wouldn't let her prompt me against my will to make a mistake by killing.

Inside the depths of my mind, I moved towards her. She had been in the dark all this time. 'Let me take over.' I spoke. Stepping forward to the gates of her mind, I held out a hand to her. Her eyes were silvered by her fear of losing.

'You won't have to submit to him if you let me take over.' I explained, watching her predator eyes gleam back to gold. The beast snarled at the sight of my hand reaching for her fur. My heart sunk, she used to be by my side. We were partners... but now I could not even recognize her. We were no longer whole.

'I know I did this to you...' I whispered, holding back the pain tugging in my chest. '...and I am sorry.'

She was observing me, keeping herself at a distance whilst silently fighting the images of fear lurking around her. She had ghouls behind her back, riding the smokes of stupor, pounding her with accusations but I couldn't make anything out of the whispered words.

'Move forward. Pay no heed to their words. I am here with you.' I said those words as if I had no fear hugging my shadow. I refused to look behind, giving my best to ignore them, and holding onto the bravery I once possessed.

As I thought of this, the ball of fire from earlier made its appearance beside my wolf, lighting her way towards my path. Her existence in my mind had never been known until this day. Her ethereal color was a mixture of orange and blue, as though she was a fragment of the twilight.

Miraculously, the beast was starting to trail her light, striding towards my direction. She was almost there, braving the coldblooded ghosts of her mind. Slowly, I lifted my fingers, stretching out my arm to touch the beast I had been yearning to hold since my death.

'Come back to me.' I uttered.

The beast regarded my plea, staring at my eyes for the longest of moments. And all of a sudden, a mystical streak of light bopped in between us. I stiffened, watching how the blue fire merged with the beast as if they were real halves. Their essence swirled together, lighting a blinding aurora.

'Revertere, Freya.'

"Who are you?" I screamed.

A pair of hands clamped my shoulders, pushing me down to lay back on a feathery soft surface. Breathing heavily, my chest tightened, needing more air. Breathe in. Breathe out. What happened? Cold sweat slid from my forehead down to the end of my chin.

Where am I?

"Freya, please lay back down. You look spent from the... from the sudden shift."

I pressed a palm on my forehead, deeply muddled by the earlier events. Lord Dilmond sat back on the wooden chair beside me. Looking around, I knew I was back in the castle, in my chamber as I could see. Digging deep into my memories, my head only pounded harder, causing a headache. The scenes in my head were blurred and divided.

"Hal..." I recalled. "Where is Hal?" I asked in panic.

"If you mean the warrior who saved you, he is about to head back to the southern lands with Lord Ashworth." Dilly answered, his eyes glinted with worry as if I scared him to death.

"Are you alright? Did I hurt you? How is the Queen... and... and Catherine! Did I harm anyone?" More than anxious, I released the queries. "And the boy?" I remembered.

"Calm down. Please. Please, milady. They are all fine. Look at me." He placed my hand on his cheek. "Still whole, eh?"

I nodded, thinking about his finger that I almost bit off. He raised his hands and let me examine them. One... Two... Ten. Complete set, I thought, heaving a sigh of relief.

"When was the last time you shifted?" Dilly probed all of a sudden.

Of course, this was impending. I closed my eyes. "I'm not sure. More than a week ago, I suppose."

That brought me back to memories of the lake, of my wolf still being normal and sated after Apollo forced her to come out, and played her favourite game with. He did my wolf a favour, and I... I was the one who made her this miserable, this vicious.

"You were insentient for four nights after the incident, milady, and 'tis disconcerting to find out about your beast's savage control over your body." He discerned. His green eyes passed me a perturbed mien.

I too, I wanted to voice, was immensely perplexed by the monstrous state that put me invalid as he had said. Four nights? That was a long time to be out cold. I had never been the weakling I thought I was morphing into, particularly when I was in our world. The blame was all pointed at my death. Collectively, I saw that I caused this to myself and it could be the side effect of my resurrection. But did anyone else know about my death?

"I sent my raven to deliver a letter to the Duke of Therion. This cannot go on. 'Tis truly disturbing. Not even the Queen who is expert in medicine could explain your condition!"

Would Apollo be troubled in the same way as he receives the news? No one could tell. The duke must have kept whatever transpired between us in the lake, clandestine. He was not one to disclose his plans even to his very own mother.

"But how do you feel at this time, may I ask? Are there ailments in your flesh? Can you stand up?" The earl abruptly stood as I pushed my palms against the bed and dropped my feet on the floor.

"I feel better now, milord." I honestly replied, observing myself in the meantime. Without his support, I lifted my chin up and carried my sore body off of the mattress. I had lost four days of my life lying in this chamber. If anything, Hal's unlikely appearance should be dealt with first whilst the rest of my own mysteries should thereafter be concluded.

If there was anything I kept on learning from this realm, it was to go on with my life despite the dreariest occurrences I partake in.




Long fabrics of curtains swayed with intense wind, the atmosphere was dark and gloomy, and brewing was a violent storm in the mirthless skies of Sidus. Servants rushed to close large windows, lighting torches on the walls of the halls, not provided with electricity. The roaring of thunder startled the women working outdoors. For a while, I stood still in the midst of nature's anger.

After the morning I woke up from a deep, deep slumber, my dear friend, Dilly, brought me to the castle's library, preventing me from strolling out as he had predicted the threat of a storm. The array of books and their old paper scent did not entertain me. Though inviting, I had my eyes trained on the walls. The flames of the torch reminded me of the talking ball of fire.

Quia opus ei. 'I need him,' she had said.

Alone, I walked up the stairs, around twenty and six steps where stacks of books gathered on its wall- mounted shelves. Pondering on the words of the fire, I stopped by the tall lancet window. Moisture was setting in; the rain began to pour together with the amalgamation of thunder and lightning. The cumulonimbus clouds stretched father from the castle, covering the forests and the villages.

"Who is she?" I said under my breath. My mind always drifted back to the fire's existence. She was alongside my wolf... and they merged.

"Lady White?" Catherine's voice came in. "Are you here?"

"I am upstairs, Catherine." I replied.
Her footsteps made fast, distinct paces. At her appearance, she curtsied before me and offered a smile. "The Queen sent me to speak with you."

"You may proceed." I urged, though thwart resounded in my head. Her Grace was witness to my ferocity. How could I have lost it? I was ashamed of myself, disgusted by the spectacle of bloodlust.

"The boy, milady, is in the castle with us as he has no family to claim him. The Queen's heart is compassionate; she wants to keep him here for the time being, while the search for his parents is being steered. But he is silent, not speaking a word. The Queen requests you this favour. Pray tell, he would mayhap have a warm heart towards you." She enlightened.

"Would you please clarify your description? You mean the boy my wolf hunted in the village?"

"Aye. It is him." She confirmed. "He is well- taken care of, but his mind is adrift, my dear lady."

The concern tugged my arteries, remorse filling in the tunnel of my mind. I might have traumatized the boy. Clearly, the beast frightened the youth. The image of him pleading for his life painted downright self-infamy on my face. Afflicted was an innocent boy's life due to my lost identity.

"Take me to his quarters." I ought not to move deeper into self- deprecation. It was forgiveness I sought, forget myself, I needed to see my victim.

Straight to the ground floor, we headed towards the maid's quarters to see the young one in need of attention. As Catherine lighted the way, holding candlelight, I was gripping my skirts, praying to the moon goddess that this boy's mind could still be repaired, that I wasn't too late.

"There he is, milady." Catherine bowed, leaving the door closed as I stared at the little figure, staring blankly out the window.

His back was turned against me. He was too young, looking too frail. In crisp white dress shirt and brown trousers, he sat on a wooden stool. My voice was caught in my throat. How would I console a child looking so broken?

I clenched my fists and loosened up briskly. The harsh wind entered from the window. "You stay there longer and you would catch a cold." It was all I could say, letting the words just flow by without over thinking.

Not a move of a finger, just shallow breaths that were evident from his shoulders going up and down was his answer. Guilt was mixing with my anxiety.

I heaved a sigh, moving forward. Behind him, I reached for the window pane and shut them, his body stayed still in between my arms. The sprays of rain drenched my face a little. I was sure he was wet from the rain if he had been there before the storm.

"I... I am sorry for what happened that day. It was my entire fault." I admitted. Boisterous thunder rumbled, but the child did not even flinch.

"Won't you speak to me, young one? I know I have no right to face you after my beast attempted an attack..." I laid a hand on his shoulder, feeling the dampness of his thin shirt. He had to change, he might get flu.

"But I'm here to take care of you and not to harm you." I continued. "I would never wish you harm... i- it was my wolf... she wouldn't respond to my plea. She wouldn't even talk to me. We never had for a long time." It was perhaps the coiled thoughts in my brain. I wasn't just speaking to the child but also to myself, wondering why it occurred to me.

"But beasts only howl." His little voice mumbled.

Though in sadness and regret, I was in utter surprise that the youth let out four words from his lips. Stooping down on one knee, I faced the child. His brows were curled, his lips turned in a pout. His cheeks were plump; he had a small button nose, and a wondrous pair of light blue eyes. I would have loved to see him smile the same way as he did when I first saw him selling corns and cheese.

"Have you ever shifted to know better than I?" I playfully enquired.

I watched as his brows furrowed tighter, his eyes finally turning to my direction. A cluster of curly blond hair fell on his forehead when he looked down.

"I have not." His small voice was in innocent agitation; his pronunciation of words reminded me that he was but a child of around five years, mixing W's with his consonants.

"But I will in two summers! Mamma told me so." Then in a blink of an eye, his nose scrunched and turned red. Tears were foaming in his eyes as though he remembered blue moments.

"Your mamma's right. And when you do, I'm sure you'll understand why I'm longing to hear my wolf.' I consoled him, taking his chubby hands, warming them with mine.

"You are strange." He mumbled.

"Beasts only howl." He argued, snuffling. A shed of tear involuntarily rolled down his left cheek.

"I think I am." I did not repudiate the judgment. In this world, I felt like the odd one. And this kid shared the same opinion as the duke on that night.

"How do you know that beasts only howl?" I questioned.

The boy brushed his eyes with his wrists and sniffed. His eyes still weren't free from his tears, if anything, it only multiplied as his tears streamed down his face. His hands in mine balled and I tightened my hold.

"Because ma- mma." Hi hiccupped.

"B- b- because... Mamma is... beast." He cried. "Ma- mma, is beast... She... she does not t- talk to me any- more." He sobbed harder, not being able to form any more words except for, "I- miss- her."

"Shh..." I rubbed his back, cupping his cheek. I was saddened, hurt. He was but a small pup yearning for familial touch.

As the pitter- patters of the rain grew heavier, and as lightning struck in potent anger, I held the weeping child and promised myself never to allow his heart to suffer emotional torture under my care.

On that very day, I learned from the child that his mother was the wolf who carried him through the markets, giving him a ride each time he was tired or drowsy; the one licking his wounds when he gets bruised. She was his protector, though beast, she retained her love for her pup, Galax. It was tragic to hear from a child that a story like his mother's was true.

He remembered her crying one night, when his father left their home and they had nothing. His mother ran into the woods, maybe to seek solace, to think things through. But since that night, Galax counted the days since her shift, but his fingers as he said, were no longer enough to reckon the days.

They lived in the streets, sleeping in dumpsters. When I inquired about where the goods he sold came from, the child answered,

'Mamma would run at night and after sleep, they are there already.'

My heart ached for the innocent child. He was too young to experience the miseries of life. Galax refused to speak to other people but I fared him to communicate with Dilly, and to answer his interrogations, telling him it would help in the search for his lost mother. I was sure she was looking for him too, but if it was true she was not able to return in her true form, it could be stealing her time.

Beasts, after all, only howl, I thought.

I was beginning to believe in that notion by then. Galax was making me believe in life's incongruity and austerities. My thoughts of Hal, the ball of fire, and Apollo's return were ever so present, but I pushed them back, holding onto the discovery of my beast before anything else.

"Mamma, the pumpkins have grown! The pumpkins have grown!" The merriment he possessed was spreading through the greenhouse, affecting everyone around him with his positive aura, in ripples of yellow, orange and green. I passed a look at Catherine who was infected with his mirth.

Squatting adorably whilst rubbing his hand over the orange crust of the pumpkin, I smiled and watched him for the longest time.

"They have, my dear. We can harvest them when they are bigger, and we'll carve triangular eyes and spiky teeth on them for Halloween."

His eyes widened and gleamed in awe. "They get bigger than this?"

"Aye, my little pumpkin. Haven't you seen one this big?" I drew a gap, one foot- wide in the air with my hands.

He shook his head and pursed his lips outward. "Will they grow this big," he mimicked me with his little hands, "on the morrow?"

I laughed at his charming question. "Nay, Galax. But I assume it would be by the ensuing weeks."

His brows met in the middle, expressing absorption of thoughts. I ran a hand through the stray tendrils of his curls. Beaming a smile, he stood up, his height only reaching a few inches above my knees.

"Are you sure?" he probed, the pitch of his voice amplified at the last word.

I nodded and hugged him back, ignoring the dirt under our shoes and the moisture pelting my skirts.

"Uncle Dilly!" He screamed, dashing towards the earl stretching his arms out wide.

He picked up the child and his fat arms wrapped around his neck. The boy was giggling. "Did you miss me?" The earl asked playfully.

"Yes, my word!" He couldn't get that right. "Where were you anyway?" Galax mumbled, lifting his hands up and then showing six fingers. "You were gone for this long."

The rumbling of Dilly's chest was too evident as he chuckled openly, appreciating the delightful bundle of joy in his arms. Galax's presence lightened the Castle of Therion. In the past month and a half of his stay, he drew out the life I once had, the one that I relished.

"But I am here now." Dilly replied. "More so, I have news about your mother." He gave me one of his firm smiles and I returned it with concern. "But I would have to discuss it with your mamma first."

"Catherine." I called. "Will you please take Galax to our chamber?"

"As you wish, milady." Catherine inclined her head in respect and gathered the boy from Lord Dilmond.

"Farewell my pumpkins!" He chimed before leaving.

"He is eupeptic, canty, and sunny." Dilly commented.

"I know. Who thought he was sunshine and rainbows like you, when he was once the silent young boy in the maid's quarters?" I joined in.

"Mm- hmm. A breath of fresh air from the problems of my land, indeed." He said, turning serious. "I hate to cut the bliss-

"Go on, milord." I encouraged, disagreeing with his apologies. "I'm just hoping that this isn't bad news."

"Good and bad, I believe. And there is another which perchance, depends on you." He stated, placing a hand on his scabbard.

The conversation required a long walk, and so I requested Lord Dilmond's company as we went out of the greenhouse and strolled in silence for the first couple of minutes towards the maze. The chilling breeze required fur coats for warmth. The skies were gloomy as the day I woke from the incident with Galax and Hal.

"Good or bad?" Dilly cut through the silence. The maze opening before us was taller than I expected.

"Good." I chose, eyes lingering on the tall hedges of green. Four or five meters? I couldn't tell.

"We have possible locations of Galax's mother. The information was gathered from a crofter in the borders of Villagio Lupus' farmlands. He said he was the provider of corns and cheese, and he was often paid enough shillings by the wolf, he even said she was placing the coins in a basket, clutching the handle in between her teeth."

"In that sense, I could say she still has her mind reigning over her beast." I ruminated, entering the maze with Dilly at my side. "But it is likely that she is ensnared and could no longer shift back."

Was it possible to be consumed and forever be overpowered? Had she lost control because of her emotions, it felt like a possibility for me too. My wolf had almost done the same thing. Was it the same course of events?

The sigh from Dilly was too distinct to disregard. As we walked farther, turning from left to right, I perceived the mammoth of uneasiness stomping over his blithe induced by Galax.

"And the bad?" I urged.

"She could be one of the wolves Lord Ashworth captured; the day you shifted he was in the village as well. His men, your friend by the name of Hal, included, were tasked to arrest criminals in the village. You must know that Earl Alexander Ashworth is second in the ranks of our knighthood, and all werewolves, even if only impartially with the whiff of opium or marijuana, are subject to interrogation and mostly imprisonment for a time, and if proven guilty of use and distribution, death would be the tragic sentence."

Prejudice was concocted with Lord Ashworth's supposed justice structure. What if it was true that Galax's mother was held with the scent of opium or weeds, but then she could have gotten it from the meadows, from people who use them and her fur happened to catch the goddamned smell? What about the innocent people he could victimize?

"'Tis not definite and confirmed as of the present, milady." Dilly reminded.

"But what if she's innocent, milord? Won't he give her the benefit of the doubt?" I hopefully asked.

"A small chance mayhap. Although I am not versing reassurance." His reply said it all. There was predisposition, and injustice in their government.

"Pray she is in the site pointed by the crofter." I sighed, silently, pleadingly hoping for her safety.

"Aye. Galax deserves to be with his mother. Afore I fail to recall, I have one last news for you. Is it good or bad? I cannot tell. 'Tis only upon your discretion."

Dilly abruptly halted his treads, aura glowing in a blend of blue and green. I glanced up at him with my chin held high, quietly hinting for him to proceed.

"The Duke sent his squire in my land of Horolgium, he will be there by the morrow and a tribunal is set to ensue in my estate the day after his arrival.

"Forthwith, he shall return in the castle by the evening, two moons from now that would be."

Bad, I concluded. This was bad news. Or in those moments, it was what I wanted to believe.

• • • • •

I'll leave it here for now. In the mean time you may check the first chapter, I revised it: dialogues, some scenes, and the date. I'm hoping to hear more from you since I predict by the votes, I have around 60 active readers :) Please don't be shy to comment and ask questions. Make me smile and keep voting! Ciao!

P.S.
Perhaps you are excited for Apollo's return. I know. You're welcome!