https://youtu.be/RuuWozX8P5o

I watched the moon. Only the moon, and its neighboring stars. Air coursed through the wind. I can smell it. The heavy air. Sweet, sharp, and beautiful. It was everywhere. My last breaths indicated my condition: I was dying, iron-filled blood dripping from all over my white skin. The captain's silhouette knew they were victorious. The crew walked up to me, scimitar dripping with my red blood. My clothes were practically shredded. Upon further inspection, I realized that THIS pirate captain was a WOMAN. That swagger, those curves, and her breathing... It smelled like octopi and honeydew slices. She grabbed me by the neck, dropping her cutlass. I started panicking, but was relieved when she took out her flintlock pistol. Little did I realize that she meant business. Death's scythe poked at my trachea, as did her pistol. She looked up, her eyes a crimson red, beautiful like a pair of rubies. She then grinned, her teeth white like the full moon above the sky. I winced.

https://youtu.be/-lbUHipN0F0

I gasped, feeling both relieved that it was a nightmare, and dreadfully cold and sticky. Laughter came from those black pirates, clad in red bandannas and red pants. "Time to wake up, masked peasant!" cackled one of them. "Vatch it! I could end up roasting your tongues after I get outta these ropes!" I hissed, a golden triangle fragment glowing on my right hand. One of them came forward and taunted, "Better idea: your tongue is cut and roasted!" My eyes widened. Fuck! I'm screwed! But before the fight could begin, I heard a pair of high heels. And right on the ship's wooden floor, too! 

A woman entered, and I was stunned by her appearance! A purple and red bicorne hat with a skull was on her head, giving me the clear message that she was in charge. She also wore purple pants with a white rim, a purple necklace with a golden pendant, dangling golden earrings, dark violet high heels, and a skull bra. Her skin had a light lavender hue, her eyes a crimson red, intimidating like "Ecthar, Sword of Oryx" from "Destiny: The Taken King", but at the same time, beautiful, like a pair of rubies. "Playtime's over, men. Back to manning your stations! Leave the hostage to me." Her "men" saluted and said, "Ma'am, yes, Ma'am!" Anger fueled her cheeks. "THAT'S CAPTAIN TO ALL OF YOU!" She kicked her heel into the wooden floor, letting out a disappointed sigh. I quietly joked, "Guess you could call them scurvy dogs, Captain." A sharp purple nail lifted my cheek, forcing me to look at her ruby-colored eyes. I could see darkness in her pupils, like she was born from the shadows. Her face and body had a wicked sense of pride and infatuation. I dared not to insult her, because of two reasons:

1) She was smokin' hot! Who'd want to argue with a LADY?!

2) Look where the LAST insult got me!

"A limited-edition loudmouth, hmm...?" she muttered, her eyes observing my body, still wet from the bucket of ocean water. "Charming, skinny, some parts of you are noble, but acts like a savvy savage. I like you." My heart was POUNDING! Was this love, or fear of finding the nearest bathroom, because I was a bit nervous! The skull-favoring captain stood up, which, come to think of it, was intimidating at a sitting position. "Join my crew, masked boy," she offered, "and you will be one of my favorite men... With a little bit of work, of course."

I snapped, my golden triangle fragment once again glowing, "They threw vater on me! You think that I'll join your crew after that?!" "About that... I ordered them to wake you up, apparently you've been asleep long enough. I usually demand info out of my hostages, but your personality caught my attention. I'll learn about you based on experience." "And you think that tricking me into your crew vill get you somevhere...?" Her scimitar was at my jugular vein. My golden triangle fragment stopped glowing, a sign out of many that I was afraid. "It's either that, or you're chum for the sharks! So, what'll it be: masked chum or masked pirate?" I swallowed my saliva, and said with complete respect, "I hope you like my saffy safage attitude, luffly, because I say... Masked pirate... 'Captain'." "Welcome to the crew." She held out her hand. "Er, I'm a little... 'Tied up' at the moment... Literally." The black pirates started laughing upon hearing that. The captain smacked her forehead and cut all my ropes in one fell swoop. Once I was free, I said, "And by thee vay, I haff something to show all of you."

I showed my triangle fragment, glowing like the men's eyes. The she-captain realized what it was in an instant and her eyes sparkled. "The Triforce of Power?! I heard about it, but I never found it! How did you get that?!" I smirked and said, "I saught power above visdom and courage, just like Ganondorf Dragmire before me. You see, vhen thee incarnation of Demise died in Twilight Princess, I found a third of a triangle on my right hand vun day later after hearing the news. And vun last thing: it can turn me into my true form outside the Dream Vorld. Sure glad you recruited me, huh?" She said, "For that, you can receive help for the task I'm going to give you." I said, "I'll do it on my own, but I appreciate the offer. Please, lead me to my task, Captain."

Three hours after being shown what I had to do, I was done with said task, and was just chilling for the last half-hour, when the captain called me. I said, "Done, Captain. The food has been organized by type and the clothes by where you wear them."

The crimson-eyed captain was amazed by my organization technique, and ate half a tentacle. I slightly cringed. She handed me the other half. It was raw, but she told me that it didn't have Anasakis (a parasitic roundworm that lives inside sea lion guts). So, I ate the half-eaten tentacle. She was impressed by me not tossing my cookies. So impressed, in fact, that she gave me a spot to sleep in her HQ. "Good," I said, "because there's rodents and lice that I'd rather not catch..." "Very observant... I never caught your name, what is it?" she asked. "My alias is Antasma, but you can call me Richard." She held out her hand. "Risky Boots, Pirate Queen of the Seven Seas." I smiled. 'This is going to be the start of a beautiful friendship', I thought to myself.