mal's p.o.v

"what are you still doing here?" i hear someone ask me. i turn to see ben standing next to my locker. "oh i just forgot something in my locker, what are you doing here? someone said you ditched class again." i said quickly, the dude startled me.

"you okay? i saw you run here in panic." uh what do i say? wait before i could say anything he peeked into my locker and of course he noticed my spell book. shit. my only reaction was to close it. i might've accidentally slammed it shut.

"hey, i thought you donated that to the museum like six months ago." ben looked over at me confused. "right, yeah i mean growing up on the island you don't have much so it's hard to let go of what little you did have." great answer mal, thank you mal.

"oh yeah, i get it. well i'll see you later. gotta catch up on work i missed." "right, bye." as soon as ben left i opened my locker again and took my spell book. i couldn't risk leaving it here over night. i know they say no one steals around here but that seems to good to be true.

i rushed to the dorms before anyone noticed what i had in my hands, especially fairy godmother. she always showed up when you least expected her to. it was scary. i went to drop it off and noticed evie wasn't here, she was probably with bella. i was about to throw myself into my bed when i remembered i had to go see carlos. he had asked me for something and i have it ready for him. dramatic sigh.

on my way there i was bombarded by more news reporters. how did they even get inside? i bolted straight to carlos' room and prayed to the heavens he had his door unlocked.

thankfully he did and quickly shut the door once inside. i had to make sure to lock it. i was so out of breath, it hurt.

suddenly i felt eyes go green again and my head tilt back a bit. what is happening?

"woah, easy girl." carlos said from his bed. "what? you think this is so easy? you don't have people taking a photo of you every single time you try to get a moment to yourself." i snapped at carlos, which wasn't really fair but i was tired. these damn reporters never seem to leave me alone about the break up and my mother.

"you're right, it's not like i'm the one dating ben." carlos mumbled. oh shit, i forgot he has it even worse. some media outlets like to paint him as the bad guy for 'breaking up a perfect couple'. we were only together for like two-three days, and we didn't even like each other! plus i gave him a love spelled cookie so it doesn't even count!

"shit, i'm sorry carlos. i didn't mean to snap at you. i just can't take anymore questions about my mother and ben. i'm sorry you have to deal with this too. i mean, don't you ever miss screaming at people, and just making them run away from you?" i asked him. well carlos isn't super scary, but when it was all four of us people found him intimidating.

"you're thinking of my mother, and i was usually on the other end of that. so, not really no." so carlos and evie don't miss it. i bet jay doesn't either. am i the only one that misses it?

"oh hey! did you bring it?" he asked getting up from his bed. right before i could give it to him someone opened the door. it was, chad? but i locked the door, how the fuck did he get in?

he gently closed the door as to not make noise and as he turned around he threw a key up in the air. how did he have a key to carlos and jay's room?

"hi..." he said once he saw us. "just came to use your 3D printer. won't be a sec." he acted like what he just did wasn't wrong.

"how did you get a key to my room?" carlos asked. "oh, i printed it off last time i was here. uh, you guys were sleeping." okay that's creepy, for a second there i thought jay must've given him a copy, still would've been weird though.

"look, i just- your printer's so much better than mine, and you install these hacks and everything runs so much smoother than mine-" chad tried to make carlos let him stay but didn't get through to him. "out! now!" chad looked disappointed but what did he expect? "fine, fine." he turned to leave, but he still had a key.

"chad! leave the key!" dude why is cinderella's kid so weird, what the fuck happened there. he left like a little kid, he slammed the door hard.

"mal?" carlos looked at me. oh right. "my potion?" he asked. i took out the potion that was in the shape of a gummy, and showed it to him.

"so, this thing will make me say what i really feel to ben?" he asked. "yeah but why do you need it? i mean you're already dating him, what else is there to say?" i asked. he rubbed the back of his neck and shrugged.

"i guess there's just stuff i want to talk to him about but i can't because i'm too nervous. you know it's just cute romantic dates and lots of kissing. something i wish i could talk about how i really feel but i chicken out. i just want him to know the real me without me being afraid of showing him who that is." carlos explained, woah i did not know he felt that way.

"are you sure you want to take this? because this will make you say the truth all the time no matter what. and the only reason that i'm asking is because i know that if i took this right now, i would get myself sent back to the isle. which, it's not that it sounds super unappealing, but you know.." woah that was a lot.

"i'll take my chances."

before i could give it to him dude snatched it out of my hand and ate it. he jumped back on the bed and began to speak. like actually speak.

"man, that thing was nasty! and you-you just got to man up! and while you're at it, scratch my butt." dude said to carlos. i can't believe that fucking truth gummy gave that dog the ability to fucking speak.

"you heard him, scratch his butt." i need to leave before things get weirder.

i- i don't know anymore. i left the room before i could hear what carlos had to say.

i think i should just go lay down and relax. try to forget about the isle and make peace with the fact that i'm an auradon girl now. yeah, that's it.  that's all i gotta do. on my way to my dorm i realized that i was insensitive to carlos today.

i mean, i complained about the media when he's the one actually dating ben. some people love him and write about how cute he and ben are. others try to say this is all part of some scheme the vk's have to take over auradon. hopefully this all dies down and they can leave ben, carlos and i alone. let them be happy together and just leave me out of their headlines.

"hey mal, can we talk?" speak of the devil, it was ben. he was waiting for me but why? "uh yeah, what's up?" i asked unlocking my door and letting him in.

"this may sound weird, but i thought asking you was best. i would've tried evie or jay but i feel like you'd be more honest with me. do you think carlos is tired of me?" oh okay woah, i was not ready to be asked this.

"why do you ask?" are they having relationship problems? "well i mean i feel like i'm boring him with always doing the same romantic things for him. or how i'm always dragging him to ditch with me. i mean i don't want to get repetitive but there's only so much to do around here. i wish i could take him to the castle, but my parents will just bombard him with questions. i want to take him to the other regions of auradon but i doubt fairy godmother or my parents would give us permission for any of that. i mean auradon city just has museums and schools, i doubt carlos is interested in any of that. i'm just scared he finds me boring and wants someone else."

i blinked a couple of times to mentally process everything ben had unloaded on me. woah both him and carlos are really insecure and this needs to be discussed.

"ask carlos, sit down and talk to him. ask him what he wants to do. find new ways to improve your dates. maybe let him plan some of them, you know i might have something you help you. give me a second." i went to fetch my spell book, i'm sure there's something in there that could give him some sort of boost of confidence or whatever to speak to carlos. "or you could first like talk about your fears and insecurities." i suggested as i flipped through my book.

"wait what are you doing?" ben asked. he walked over to see what i was doing. maybe using a spell on someone who've i've used magic on before wasn't the best thing. "are you going to spell me? again?" he asked. "look ben, i'm sorry i'm just really tired and i've had to deal with so much already. and then you come and unload all your problems on me, i thought this was the best way to fix it." i tried to explain myself, which probably made the situation worse.

"mal i'm sorry that i unloaded by problems on you but you could've just told me to back off. no need to spell me!" i didn't notice he was reading the pages of book until it was too late.

"blonde hair spell? nice spell? you need a spell to help you be nice?" he asked, okay look i may have used that once or twice. okay maybe more than twice but i can't help myself.

"and i was giving you props for fitting in so well, for doing your best." ben shook his head. it just hard, he doesn't understand.

"you don't understand! you're not from the isle where you have to be mean to survive. being nice isn't just going to come natural to me like with evie or carlos or even jay!" mal stop talking before you dig yourself into a bigger hole.

"yes but you could've talked to us! we can help you, you don't need to use a spell to be nice! your telling me this whole time you've been faking everything?" ben sounded so disappointed in me, if the others knew they would be disappointed to. i don't blame them. they can't find out though, it would break evie's heart if i told her i didn't want to be here anyone.

"take back this moment that has passed. return it- reverse it-." fuck i messed it up. i seriously messed up.

"are you trying to spell me right now? look you know what mal, i'm gonna go. i'm sorry i bothered you, but this, what you're doing with magic, it's got to stop. we all thought you changed, i guess we were wrong." ben left but he was right.

they thought i changed but they were wrong. i can't change. i'm just like my mother! nothing can make me change from my old ways, i mean look at me! evie, carlos and jay have their life together and i'm a fucking mess. i'm not cut out for auradon. i'm not cut out for this happily ever after life.

i can't take it anymore, i can't keep living like this. i shouldn't pretend this is my home. it's not my home and it will never feel like home. i might as well go back to the isle. 

i grabbed my bag, my book and my jacket. i changed out of the stupid dress i was wearing and into something that was more me. more isle of the lost. i also grabbed my mom and put her in a box, which sounds weird without proper context. she's coming with me, i'm taking her home now.

i wrote a simple note for evie to find, telling her that i'm sorry and to not come after me. this was for the best.

i snuck out and went to where the school kept the students bikes and scooters and other shit. i grabbed the first one i saw and with the help of magic i was able to take it and hotwire it. it was like the scooter bike thing ben used to take us on our 'first date'.

i drove through the forest to get to the edge of auradon. "noble steed, proud and fair, you shall take me anywhere." please work, please work... it did! home here i come.

||im working on a descendants one shot book so :)) ||