Shikamaru x !Depressed reader
This takes place a few months after Azuma's death. The reader hasn't left her house in a while...she hasn't gone on a mission in forever and...something is off with her...she just...won't smile
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//(Y/n)'s Pov\\
The tears wouldn't stop sliding down my cheeks as I kneeled beside Azuma Sensei, listening to every word he said, because this time...there would be no "See you soon"
He was gone. I had to accept it, I knew I did...but I wasn't able to. Azuma Sensei had given me everything, he made me into a stronger person, able to stand up for myself. I was able to fight and breathe because of him...
He saved me from death at the hands of rogue ninja, and he saved me from myself.
Now he was dead.
Sobs escaped from me as I opened my (e/c) eyes, tears that had built up cascaded down my cheeks like a waterfall as I sat up from my bed. Trying to bite back the scream I wanted to let out I calmed my breathing so only a few hiccups escaped from my lips now.
Leaning my back against the wall my bed was pressed against I pulled my knees to my chest and laid my head on top of them, hugging my arms around them as a voice called from the outside of my apartment.
"(Y/n), you awake?"
Skikamaru...he keeps checking in on me...my answer is always the same so I don't get why he keeps coming.
Steadying my voice from cracking I took a deep breath before I finally answered him.
"Yeah"
Listening closely to the sound of him outside my door I caught the sound of him sighing softly.
"Why don't you come out? We haven't seen you in a while you know"
"...." Silence was my answer for a few moments before I responded "I'm not feeling well, I might be sick so I wouldn't want to get you sick"
"Do you really think I'm stupid? I see what's going on (Y/n), it's been months since the death, you need to come out"
I felt more tears start building up as Shikamaru spoke up. I knew I needed to go out...I really did, Azuma wouldn't want me to grieve over his death, but I couldn't help it.
Letting the emotions get the best of me like they have been for months I felt myself start shaking as I started yelling at the black-haired boy outside
"Shut up Shikamaru! I don't want to come out okay?! Just leave me be..." My voice cracked off at the end of my yelling "please...I'm so tired..."
Listening closely again I picked up the sound of his footsteps leaving, not one word from him. Sniffling I decided to lay back on my bed, pulling the blanket over me as I started at the wall.
Whispering to myself I closed my (e/c) orbs.
"...I'm so tired Shika, I'm hurting...forgive me for inflicting my emotions on you..."
Before I could process anything I felt arms wrap around my body, making my eyes flash open to get a look at who was holding me.
Shikamaru.
"If you're tired you can take a nap with me later if you're hurting I'll help. So stop apologizing already and sit up"
Letting go of me he stood beside the bed waiting. Watching him I slowly sat up from my bed, creaking slightly as I pressed my feet to the floor.
"...I know it's been months, I just...I can't get over it Shika..."
A small smile crossed his lips as he grabbed my hand and pulled me up to a standing position.
"It's alright to hurt, we'll always hurt, but there's always a way to lessen that hurt, even if just a bit"
Sighing slightly the black-haired boy looked me in the eyes.
"But, to fix the hurt you feel you have to let us in, the tiredness comes with the pain, so let us help"
Blinking slowly as I listened to him I finally nodded as my answer.
"Good, but before anything else, we're getting you food, you haven't been eating anything we've brought you"
It wasn't a question, he knew I hadn't been eating right...it wasn't even because I wasn't trying it's just anytime I tried eating it made me feel so sick.
"It made me feel sick...so I didn't eat"
A drawn-out sigh fell from Shikamaru's lips as he grabbed my hand and pulled me out of my apartment.
"Well, at least try okay? Also, don't leave your window open if you're sleeping, you should know that"
I frowned as he led me through the village, the sun was so bright...it'd been a while since I've stepped outside.
"It's so bright..."
"Is that...there's no way! (Y/n)!!"
Having no warning I groaned and fell on my back as I was tackled into a hug, hesitantly wrapping my arms around the person I found it was Ino who had tackled me.
"Hey, Ino...it's been a while huh?"
I heard a small sniffle come from the blonde girl as her arms tightened around my body.
"You haven't been coming out at all and you were always sleeping when Choji and I came around to check in you, we were so worried!"
A small smile crossed pulled at my lips as Skikamaru let out a sigh alongside his catchphrase.
"What a drag"
"It's okay Ino...I'm sorry I worried you guys, but...I'm here now"
Ino finally let her grip loosen and let me sit up as she pulled away smiling her eyes glistening before frowning and looking me over.
"You look so thin..."
Just as I was about to come up with an excuse Shikamaru cut me off with his own answer.
"Yeah, I know, I'm taking her to the barbeque shop to get some food and hopefully bring her appetite back"
Ino's blue eyes narrowed as she looked me over, it kinda felt like she was staring inside of me.
"I'll be coming with you, she needs to eat a proper amount as well as drink a lot of water, with being this thin she's also going to need to train up again"
I grumbled as I pushed myself to my feet, a sigh escaping my lips as I unknowingly stole Shikamaru's line.
"What a drag"
Ino and Shikamaru looked at each other before they snorted and chuckled as they looked at me.
"What? Why are you guys laughing at?"
I smiled at me as she chuckled again.
"You copied Shikamaru! You stole his line (Y/n)"
Blinking I tilted my head in confusion.
"I did? Guess I hadn't realized..."
Skikamaru rolled his eyes before grabbing my hand again and leading myself and Ino towards the barbecue shop.
Starting to think about the memories I felt my lip quiver, but before any tears started forming Shikamaru squeezed my hand slightly and rubbed his thumb over my hand, comforting me.
Soon enough we arrived and to no one's surprise Choji was sitting in a booth chowing down on some meat, though almost as soon as I spotted him he stopped eating. Choji of all people stopped eating.
Shikamaru rolled his eyes again and led us over to the table, Ino sitting beside Choji, slightly pushing him so she had room to sit, while Shikamaru gently pushed me into the seat and then sat down himself.
"It's good to see you out and about again (Y/n)" turning his gaze to Ino and Shikamaru he asked, "How'd you two get her to come out?!"
Ino shrugged as she stole some meat from Choji who gasped at her audacity.
"I don't know, ask Shikamaru, he's the one who was walking with her before I ran into them"
Expecting an answer from Shikamaru, Choji turned his head.
"You guys don't really need to know, she came out, and she needs food, that's all you need to know"
Choji blinked before scanning me over.
"You're way too thin! Shikamaru's right, you need food stat!"
And for the next hour, I was sat at that table eating as much as I could stomach and catching up with my old team.
Finally, Shikamaru decided to leave with me and said that we'd catch up later with Choji and Ino.
"Hey, Shika?"
Turning his head to look at me with his arms behind his head he let out a hum.
"Hm?"
"Thank you...for helping me"
A chuckle escaped from him as he smiled genuinely.
"No problem (Y/n), I'll be here anytime you need it okay? It took me a while to get over the pain, and it's not gone, it'll always be there...but it'll eventually dull. Just remember his words okay?"
I felt myself smile as a single tear slid down my cheek, stopping my feet I turned to Shikamaru before grabbing him by the collar of his vest.
I watched as his eyes widened just slightly.
"Do you know what Azuma Sensei's last words to me were?"
"No I don't, why don't you tell me?"
My smile widened a tiny bit as I looked at the black-haired boy.
"Don't let your love go, hold on tight with everything you have, and support each other. Keep loving Shikamaru"
Shikamaru's eyes widened even more and I heard his breath hitch as I chuckled.
"He knew, I kept it so well hidden that I had fallen in love with you, no one else caught on, but...Azuma knew. So now, I'm telling you"
Finally composing himself after the shock a smirk formed on his lips as he hummed lazily.
"Damn, and here I thought he was a lair"
Confused I opened my mouth to ask what he meant but I was swiftly cut off by his lips gently pressing against mine.
Closing my eyes I let go of his vest and wrapped my arms around his neck, gently kissing back before we both pulled away chuckling and said in sync.
"What a drag"
I smiled as I thought to myself
Thank you Azuma Sensei...even when you're gone, you're still making us smile
Skikamaru smiled back as he held me, just enjoying the moment.
You nosy old man, thanks.
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