Anakin

I found myself sitting on one of the tallest towers of the Temple, my legs hanging from the edge of the floor as my forearm rested on the railing.

  The air was cold and it smelled just the same. Not bad, but not good, the simple scent of the city, I was getting tired of it. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply just to exhale seconds later, simply thinking.

  I felt that everything was so routinely, so the same...I was getting sick of living the same thing over and over again every day. It was as if everything and everyone, included myself, was stuck in a loop, nothing changed, everything seemed so repetitive: people died on this war, people lost their homes, people were not able to laugh as easily as before, everything is the fucking same. I am losing my mind.

I sighed as I heard footsteps behind me, opened my eyes and turned around to find my favourite Jedi walking towards the spot where I was sitting. She smiled weakly at me and I smiled back with the same effort.

I don't know if it's just me, but Lana seems sad. I don't doubt she is with everything that's been happening lately, the war has affected us all in many ways. She's still very beautiful, she grows more beautiful as the days go by, and she remains so kind, and she smiles and laughs but she's sad. She sat beside me as she let out a deep sigh.

"Figured you'd be here." She said after a pause in which we only heard the buzz of the engines from the speeders that flew past us.

"How so?" I asked.

"Well, when we were younger you either hid from the world here or at the workshop. Checked the second location first after reporting to the Council about my mission and, since you weren't there, assuming you'd be here wasn't complicated." I chuckled and nodded, she knows me like she knows the back of her hand. "You still have those habits." I scoffed.

"You're one to talk." She chuckled. "Sunsets are calming, specially after you failed to rebuild a circuit to ease your mind." I said after a while, she looked at me and I simply let out yet another sigh.

"Talk to me." She said softly as she caressed my hair with her fingertips, making me smile weakly. Allana always knew that, whenever I tried to rebuild or fix something, is because things were really upsetting me. And with everything that has happened in the past few weeks, I believe no one could dare blame me for feeling down or overwhelmed. Obviously, no one said a thing, they just patted my back or shoulder and said 'things will get better' as if that ever fucking helped or they simply smiled and nodded before waking away, pretending they know how I feel and thinking that they understand when they actually don't.

"I don't have my head in the game. Everything feels so...empty. I mean, everything is so tiring and I feel exhausted, not to mention that...I miss her." Lana frowned with sadness when my eyes met her face briefly. "I no longer have someone to argue with on a daily basis, or destroy droids with as we compete, someone to talk to that's not Rex or Fives at the Cruiser...you know?" My eyes met hers again and I shrugged. "Yeah...I guess I just miss her." She nodded and continued to run her fingers through the back of my head. I closed my eyes under that touch.

"Me too. We all do." She moved closer to me, my head fell over her shoulder. "I miss someone laughing at me when a plan sounds stupid all of the sudden." I chuckled. "Or rolling her eyes with amusement whenever you and Obi-Wan argue, or Cal and I." I smiled.

"Or someone being sassy whenever I fuck up mid-battle." She laughed alongside me, we stayed in silence for a hot minute as my smile faded while my thoughts continued to float around my head. "I hope that she's okay...wherever she is."

"I think she is alright, I mean, you taught her to take care of herself and she knows how to handle herself pretty well, Ani, she left that quite clear since day one and throughout her years as your Padawan. You taught her how to fight guys much bigger than herself and, if you ask me, I believe that if she was able to fight Grievous and survive she can handle anything." I smiled softly. "She's strong, stronger than most of us, I believe." I moved and looked at her, my forehead touched hers gently. She smiled and, like a virus, her calmness invaded me.

"You're right. I told her once that I did deserve most of the credit." She chuckled and rolled her eyes, Lans moved inches away and looked at the lilac sky, she smiled as she looked at her favourite colour. As she looked at the early stages of the night, I studied her features and noticed her eyes were lost deeply into her thoughts, her smile had faded away too. "Now, you talk to me."

"About what?"

"I don't know. Something's bothering you." She sighed. "Did something happen while you were in Sivad?" She nodded and it was my turn to place my hand on the back of her neck, my thumb drawing circles on her skin.

"We we're just patrolling and scouting the war zone where we were called at when we were ambushed. It was a trap the Separatists pulled off on us, the distress signal was genuine but the rebel cell had been massacred before we even got there." A pause. "It was a tough battle and we were sort of massacred too, Cal is angry at me because I didn't let him face a whole droid squad on his own. I know he's more than capable to fight those stupid machines, but he was going to be overrun and he thinks that I doubt him now; many of my men were killed and...it's simply been an awful, complicated and exhausting day, that's all." I threw my arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, she exhaled when her head fell upon my shoulder.

"I hate this city." I said after a few minutes had gone by.

"Me too." A moment of silence. "Would it be too soon?"

"For what?"

"Leaving." I frowned.

"Leaving? Leave what?"

"The Order." I moved away from our embrace and frowned even more as I looked at her, it was too soon to talk about this, Ahsoka left only couple weeks ago.

"We agreed we'd wait for war to be over."

"I know, but with each day that goes by, it seems more and more never-ending. I'm tired, you know? Tired of waking up and fight droids designed to kill, of creating more uneasiness than peace, tired of doing it over and over again." She paused as she ran a hand through her braided hair. "There's a lot of death around us, we get injured, we have to be apart, we can't be together...it sucks. I don't want to keep fighting, I'm so done with it, what I want is to live calmly, I'm too young to think I could certainly die tomorrow's afternoon." She added softly after a moment, I frowned when I saw her so overwhelmed all of the sudden, usually, she's able to handle her emotions pretty well but, by the way she's speaking and the look on her face, assuming and picturing today's battle isn't complicated and it certainly was a detonator. I can't blame her either.

"I agree, but...if I'm honest, I'm not sure I can leave now. No matter how much I'd love to move to the countryside and just...do absolutely nothing or learn how to do that flower thing your father does on his garden that you like so much." She smiled as I moved a curly lock away from her face and placed it behind her ear. "I'm not sure now is the best time for leaving."

"Maybe..."
"For me." She frowned as I let my mind loose.

"What if you leave? Just wait for me somewhere calm by the lakes."

"No. The reason why I can't leave, besides Cal's training, is that I could not be elsewhere that's quiet and calm knowing that you could die on the battlefield while I am walking downtown. Plus, we agreed that if we left, we'd leave together, no matter what."

"True." She gave me a nod and we smiled at each other briefly. "I feel the end of the war closer than before, despite everything that's going on around us."

"Me too, but I also feel something...dark approaching. I can't pinpoint it and that upsets me." She shivered. "It's weird and whatever it is, it's so well hidden. It feels as if it's getting closer but at the same time it feels like it's already here and just...waiting. I don't know."

"I understand what you mean, I feel it too... something deep, as if all of this had a deeper meaning than we thought." She nodded as she looked at the ships. "We shouldn't worry about it yet, I assume is the end of an era and endings are always tough."

"I hope you're right."

"What are you talking about? I'm always right! What do you mean you'll 'hope' for me to be right?" She laughed and that smile...that goddamn smile that made me burn for her even more appeared over her lips.

"I mean that you're not always right. I'm the one who is."

"Nah, you just are to show off." She shrugged. "Or you pretend to be." She pretended to be offended, making me chuckle.

"Maybe. Still, I'm smarter than you."

"A bit." She chuckled again and I moved inches closer to kiss her lips tenderly. She kissed me back immediately and her hand cupped my cheek while mine was placed on the back of her neck to pull her closer to me, for I've missed her touch a lot, being weeks apart kills me. I smiled into the kiss as a thought popped in my head, feeling her smile against my lips too. "We should get out of here." I said, breaking the kiss.

"Right. And go where?" Her hazel orbs looked into my eyes, excitement in them as she smiled and bit her lip.

"I don't know...somewhere, anywhere, but somewhere where we could be husband and wife for a bit. I think we deserve that." She looked at me as the stars shone over the night sky and in her eyes. "I know a place in the Outer Rim, I feel like being Set for a while, at least for three days or...however long." She chuckled. "Wouldn't you like to be Veré for a few days?"

"It would be fun." I leaned closer and kissed her lips again.

"Lets get out of here." She chuckled as I smiled, a smile was glued to her lips as well. "Lets leave this ugly city behind now." She smiled more and looked at me, her hands caressed my skin softly as her smile grew a bit smaller.

"Can we leave tomorrow morning? I have to sort things out with Kestis first." I nodded. "I think leaving him in charge of the battalion could work as bribery." I chuckled and nodded again.

"It would most definitely work. And answering your question, sure, we can leave tomorrow, Saturday, Sunday, whenever you'd like." She smiled and kissed me again before letting go.

"Thank you." She stood up. "You coming?" I nodded and she extended a hand to help me up, I smiled and grabbed it, her hand squeezed my own to pull me.

"Thanks." I said once I towered her as we stood before each other. Today, it felt as if our lips were magnets, she threw her arms around my neck and mine were around her waist, my fingertips brushing the exposed skin of her lower back, the lower edge of her scars. She stood on her tiptoes to place a soft kiss on my lips, a brief one. "Let's go." She nodded and we started to walk back into the Temple, my arm around her shoulders and hers around my waist.

Everything felt good for a moment, she made everything feel good, better, lighter. But there was still something in my chest that was bothering me, something that didn't feel exactly right. That dark and sinister thing, whatever it is, I couldn't point out what it was either or why was it there, why was I feeling it or why was Lana feeling it. It was odd.

Whatever it is, it feels like it's coming with steady and slow steps, as if it was a beast getting ready to attack it's prey. It feels near, like a breath being exhaled on my ear or the back of the neck, like a cold breeze or cold sweat going down my spine.

I hope light can push it away, though; that light can embrace us all again and I hope for things to be okay, maybe even back to normal, even if I knew they won't be as they once were. Maybe it can be like Obi-Wan always says: if we stick together, everything will be alright. I hope that's right, for all of our sakes.

End of the first book.

a/n: hello everyone! so, that's a wrap on the first part of Allana and Anakin's story! i hope you've enjoyed it so far, your comments and feedback have been very lovely and fun to read! i really have a laugh whenever i go through what you write as you read through the chapters :)

i'd love to see you all on the following part, i believe it'll be fun and very emotional lol.

thank u for the support on this, to be honest, when i started writing this, it was just for fun (no that it no longer is, though) and certainly didn't expect many of you to read it and enjoy it so much! i'm very grateful for it and for every single one of you.  i'm glad you've liked the writing, despite all the grammar and spelling mistakes. talking about this, i will go through the chapters and correct them soon after i publish this. :)

i hope every single one of you has a lovely day/night/evening or whatever time it is wherever you are. i love u all, drink some water and stay safe, okay? see you soon! <3

sincerely, lans.