The ride home is silent. Zayn bites his lip nervously and I sniffle occasionally, but he doesn't say anything. He hasn't since we left the office. I know that we both have too much to say but the fear of saying the wrong thing is all too present.

My head is pounding with pain, like I've been repeatedly bashed with a brick. My eyes burn, my face feels entirely too warm. I'm uncomfortable. It all has to do with everything that's happened today. I need to wrap my head around this, it'll be easier to adjust once I accept that this is how things truly are. I can't pretend that none of this is real, even if I'd really like to.

The car slows down and I try not to stare at him as he parks the car. Once he does, I immediately get out. The heavy feeling in my chest weighs me down and I wish I could just be in the apartment where I'm safe.

Instead, Zayn pulls my hand forcefully into his and intertwines our fingers. We walk into the lobby, his grip too tight for comfort. We only wait a few seconds for the elevator and even once we step in, my nerves go into a frenzy when I see he's stopped the elevator completely on the third floor.

"What the hell? What are you doing?" I interrogated.

Zayn replies by putting his arms on the sides of my head, pinning me with his body against mine, blocking the buttons. "Give me a kiss."

I almost feel normal with him against me like this, I begin to feel familiarity again. But I know what he's doing and I can't let him make me forget again. I can't let him hypnotize me with soft touches like he has so much before.

I frown. "Fuck no. I want to go upstairs, Zayn."

"Watch your mouth," He says through his teeth, "why are you being like this with me?"

What? How can he ask that? Is it not clear enough?

"You really don't know?"

His expression softens. "It's all out of my control, Ana... I couldn't even tell you where it all began because I don't know exactly."

His fingertips trace my jaw, his feathery caress making little butterflies awaken in my stomach.

"You lied to me about yourself, your job... You do things that are way worse than anything I could ever imagine doing... Yet I have to stop all my bad habits."

He looks terrifying. His eyes close as if to gain composure, but instead his breathing becomes shallow.

"Shut the fuck up." He seethes, "You don't even know what you're saying to me right now."

I raise a brow. "Oh? You're being a hypocrite, you make me feel like I'm the bad one, but look at you."

The metallic taste comes first, but the warm sting follows immediately after. He's stepped away from me, but it's all happened too fast for me to even realize what he's done.

Tears swim in my eyes and I blink them away as I told my cheek, hoping the pain will go away quickly.

"I told you to shut the fuck up, Anastasia. "

"I want to go home." I cried, "I don't want to be here with you anymore."

The elevator starts moving again as soon as he presses the buttons. He ignores every word I'm saying, and grabs my hand instead.

I can't believe how fucked up everything is. How quickly he's changed... Then again, I didn't know who he was before too well. My heart keeps sinking lower as the elevator goes up higher and I start to wish I had never gone to the office at all.

We finally arrive on the top floor, and Zayn basically drags me out of the elevator. I do want to be here with him, though. I do want him to adore me. I want him to take care of me and protect me, but I don't want him to hit me. And it all seems very juvenile and very stupid of me, but I do stay and never regret it at all.