"And the award for
The best lie goes to you.
For makin me believe,
that you could be
faithful to me.
Let's hear your speech. Ohhh..."

"No no no! You're still off.
What happened to the girl in the video, hmm? Where'd she go?
You know, I had to go to bat for you, to get you in- the other professors didn't see what I seen in you." I couldn't believe she would say that in front of my peers. Those words made me feel so small and inadequate. I was completely embarrassed.

"When I was listening to you, you gave me chills and made be believe that the song choice was your life story because you carried yourself with so much passion and professionalism. This song doesn't gimme the same effect. The showcase for first years is in 2 weeks, you don't have time to screw up. This showcase will determine if you come back for a second semester. You do wanna come back, don't you?" I set the mic back on the stand and peered out into the audience, which was made up of other first year students. They didn't seem all to impressed either. "Yes ma'am. I do."-- "Then prove it."

I was the last practice before we were dismissed. I had an overwhelming sensation that I shouldn't be here. I just wanted to be back at home. I had no right being in this building, being taught by world renown professors or being in the presence of all these incredibly talented people.

As I sat in an empty seat, I really began to question my life and where I'm going in it. The warmth of a human hard found it's way onto my shoulder. I glanced up to find my professor. "Let me ask you something. When you sent in your audition tape; why did you choose that song? What was it about that song that allowed you to give that level of a performance?"
I pondered her questioned for a few moments. I had no idea how to put it into words. "I was in love" I whimpered trying my best to hold back tears. My professor crouched down in front of me gently patting my back. "Was? So what are you now?" I really didn't know how to answer that. My own emotions confused me, never mind trying to explain it to someone else. "Hurt."--
"Well my dear, the only thing I can say is you're here for a reason. You have a gift. Harness that pain and turn it into something wonderful. Never forget, through great sorrow comes great strength." With that, she was gone off leaving me alone with nothing but wise yet familiar words.

Later that day I gave my mother a call. We had a pleasant conversation. She revealed to me that a few weeks ago (YC/N) came looking for me. I feel bad that I left without saying goodbye to her but leaving her would be way to hard. I thought it'd be easier to leave without saying goodbye. 'Maybe I should call her.'

"Hey, (YN.) we're going to grab a bite to eat. Did you wanna come with us," My room-mate Brookelynn gestured towards a group of mutual friends standing just outside our door.
"Of course. Give me a few minutes. I need to make a call." She grabbed a sweater hanging on the back of our door and whispered "We'll meet you in the lobby" before exiting the room.

I grabbed my phone off the bedside table and gave her a call, however I got her voice mail, so I left a message. "H-hey (YC/N.) I finally got my phone replaced!! Okay.. I-I know you're probably mad at me for leaving without telling you. I know I've got a lot of explaining to do. Look, I don't know if you're up for it but on the 30th there's a showcase for all first years. My mom's coming and it'd mean a lot to me if you'd be here too. My number's still the same so call me if you're up to it."

I sighed and hung up the phone, sliding it into my pocket while I slipped on some shoes. I left my room and made my way through the music filled hall way. Students were just jamming out left and right. I completely envied them for their confidence to just be themselves, let loose and have fun. When I approached the lobby my new found friends were there waiting for me.
"What took you so long?!"
End Pov

(YC/N) POV
I hopped out of the shower when my mom started banging on the door. "Your phone hasn't stopped making sounds and I'm trying to watch my stories. Next time turn off the damn volume" I came out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel to find my phone sitting on the bookshelf in the hallway. I had 6 texts and, 2 missed calls.'Text from Ashley, text from Cody, 3 texts from Kayla and 1 from Steph'I began to reply to the first text when I was interrupted by a notification of a new voice mail. 'Who the hell calls anymore...' Before even checking to see who called I clicked to listen to the voice mail. My mouth dropped open wide when I heard her voice. I felt like she called me from beyond the grave or something because we haven't spoken in a couple of weeks. Instantly I hung up and rang her. There was so much I had to tell her.

"Hey you! Listen I got some news for you!"-- Okay but first, (YC/N) I'm really sorry." I could hear it in her voice she genuinely felt bad and yeah I was still a little upset with her, but discussing why she left without telling me can wait.

"We can talk about that later. Anyway the day you left Mark and Arin actually came by. We went looking for you, and even followed you to the airport. We seen you with (GF/N)... We seen you guys kiss... What's that about?"--"What? It's okay for him to fuck around with another girl but I can't kiss another guy?! What nerve!"

She went on and on over how hurt she was and still is. "Li.Lis..LISTEN TO Me!!!" She got quiet when I finally lost my cool and shouted. "He didn't cheat! Barbra came onto him..."--"I can't believe you believe that crock of shit. He cheated, and the only reason he came to Washington was because..w-well I don't know, it was probably eating away at him and he wanted to clear his conscious by trying to apologize with the perfect string of lies. Regardless, He said he loved me. He obviously didn't. For all I know he probably says that to a lot of girls just to get in their pants. I can't believe you, you know that! It-It's hard enough trying to forget about him and what he did. I don't need you trying to cover for him. I thought you'd be on my side."--"I am on your side!.." She wouldn't even let me finish. "Well, you sure aren't acting like it. Call me back when you step back into the real world."

With that, she was gone. I made several attempts to call her back, but she refused to answer. I figured it'd be best to try and talk to her once she's calmed down. So, I left her alone.
End POV

Your POV

A silence fell over our table when I hung up the phone. I starred blankly down into the glass of water in my hand as I softly whirled it around as if it were wine.
This was no place to break down but my emotions were being kicked into over-drive. If anything I was even more confused. A single tear broke free from my eye and began to slowly guild down my heated cheeks. A hand reached over the table and patted my free hand. "Want me to take you back to our room?" I clamped my eyes shut in an effort to hold back my tears but when I realized that wasn't going to work, I simply nodded my head up and down. "Alright, you guys go ahead and order, I'm gonna take her back. We'll catch up later."

When we arrived back at our room Brookelynn sat bedside with me. She may not know me all too well but she was soft and kindhearted, allowing me to finally let myself go and just cry leaving me to ponder if Hell was still beneath me, because it felt like I was already there. "What, happened exactly? I want to try and help as best as I can but, I may be of more assistance if I knew what was going on." I remained quiet, refraining from confessing my complex thoughts and emotions. "Please, tell me. You can talk to me, (YN.) We're not just room mate's, I'd like to believe we're on our way to a strong level of friendship. Now, please tell me?" 

After I felt the sincerity on her voice and the warmth in her eyes, I spilled my guts and told her everything. By the time I had finished explaining the only thing she had to say was "You're dating Markiplier?!" The fact that she even knew who he was threw me for a bit of a loop. "I was. It's over now." She was in complete disbelief. "I don't believe you. Prove it," she muttered. I just let out a deep sigh and shook my head. The fact I had to prove it was unbelievable. "You wanted to help and be a good friend but yet you don't believe me? That makes sense. Go on his twitch account. We did a live stream together about a month ago."

Brookelynn didn't need to be told twice. In mere minutes she had her laptop out and on her lap, watching our stream. I left her to do her thing while I went to the washroom.
By the time I came back, she beckoned me over. "Come here. I don't know if you've seen this but if you haven't you should." I took a seat beside her, and she unplugged her headphones as she clicked play.  As I watched my heart sank into my stomach listening to his every word and seeing the pain on his face as he said he's quitting YouTube.

'This isn't what I wanted. I wanted him to be happy, even if it was without me.'