— trente-sept et demi ; thirty seven and a half —

[ bonus chapter : told from lucas' pov ]

LUCAS WAS FEELING in a moderately — and he would even go as far as to say highly — self-piteous mood, seeing as it was a Saturday night.

Unlike the rest of his teammates, who groaned and griped about the mandatory banquet between national Exy teams, Lucas had been quite looking forward to the event. To say he'd been shocked when he'd first come to Edgar Allan to join the Ravens would be, put lightly, an understatement. He'd heard the rumours and seen the news and been warned that the Ravens weren't an easy team, that joining them was more than hard work and talent, that it was blood and sweat and tears and mindless dedication to perfecting a sport that was now your life. He'd heard it all but he hadn't really expected the violent and ruthless undercurrents running through the fractured team.

So for Lucas, the banquet was an opportunity to see how the other Exy teams appeared and so he could make the implicit comparison. Despite his initial reservations and fears — he'd watched one of his teammmates try to strangle another on his first day with the Ravens, the alarm felt entirely justified to him — he had no regrets about joining the Ravens. They were the first ranked team in the country for a reason and although he hadn't been granted any court time yet, just watching their flawless ability to tear their opponent apart from the sidelines and knowing he was on the winning side was enough. That didn't mean he wasn't curious about the other teams, or as the Ravens were quick to put it, the competition.

It had been sadly underwhelming. Lucas was most curious about the Foxes, once ranked dead last until Kevin Day and Neil Josten joined their lime up. But the Foxes had been seated across the court from them — for good reason, no doubt, considering the bad blood between the two teams — and the Ravens were occupied with the Trojans. Not even the incident with Henri and his brother had been enough to make up for the meaningless polite chatter at dinner. In fact, Lucas barely saw Henri for the entire evening after the tables were pushed aside and the dance floor formed, but he knew enough that there was something going on with him that was none of his business.

That didn't stop almost every single Exy player on that court/dance floor gossiping about Jean and Henri disappearing in the middle of the dinner. More than one person asked Lucas about it and he wasn't entirely feigning his innocence. He never would have spilled anything about Henri to strangers that he didn't want them to know but the truth was, he didn't really know. Henri was an awfully private person, a stark contrast from Lucas' other fellow freshman teammate Kit, who gave him every unwanted detail about his new relationship.

Lucas sighed and tossed his phone aside. Maybe he should have joined the others at the bar instead of wallowing alone in the room. He'd just been glad he wasn't stuck alone with Zena and Kit anymore — just like Kit was as open as Henri was closed, their behaviour in relationships were polar opposites. Lucas didn't think he'd ever seen Soren or Henri even touch for an extended period of time in front of the team, forget hug or hold hands, but Kit and Zena lived for their PDA. He would have been better off sharing a room with one of the upperclassmen to avoid watching Kit stick his tongue down Zena's throat every five seconds.

Lucas had to admit, a small part of his unwillingness to see that — beyond it being awkward and uncomfortable for him — was that he was a little jealous. He'd had a girlfriend in high school but they both knew it was convenience, a comfortable yet unexciting relationship. His dad had been happy that he'd chosen a steady relationship with a fellow Exy player and Lucas had thought so too, but now he wasn't so sure. Janie Jackson was the perfect teenager — straight A student, always home by curfew, never skipped out on Exy practice. Lucas was drawn to her because they shared the same practical, ordered approach to life and appreciated that she liked an early night in as much as he did.

He wasn't sure when that appreciation had faded to something a little more stale, which was unfair on Janie, he knew. He had the same traits he eventually found boring in her and a small part of him wished he didn't, that a more reckless and impulsive partner could bring out those qualities in him. He'd liked Janie well enough but he'd also not felt particularly upset when she broke up with him before going they went their separate ways to college. Now that he was part of the Ravens, it was impossible to get to know someone outside the team well enough to consider dating, even if he would have time around their tight practice schedule.

It made sense why so many of the Ravens dated — or maybe hooked up was a better word. Their team was crammed in the same space for most hours of the day and did everything together, from training to eating and living. Even with all the tension and competition within the team it was impossible to avoid each other, so that the tension turned sexual was hardly surprising to anyone. It didn't even have to be positive sexual tension — just looking at Soren and Jude, who clearly had some kind of history, that was clear enough. But Lucas, he couldn't do that. He'd never been the "work off the sexual tension through sex" kind of guy — the only person he'd slept with was Janie and that had been after they'd been together for eight months.

No, he definitely wasn't the kind of guy who could have a friends with benefits relationship. As lame as it was — and he knew Kit would take the piss out of him forever if he ever admitted it — he wanted it to mean something when he had sex with someone. He wanted it to be more, where the person cared about him for his thoughts and feelings and opinions rather than, well, how good he was in bed. Which probably wasn't all that good seeing as he didn't have much experience. Something of that calibre felt impossible in a team as fucked as the Ravens. Even if he wanted to, who would he have dated? His choice was limited with only three girls on the team. Alixis made him nervous with her cool eyes and sharp commands. Loren, as sweet and pretty as he could appreciate she was, felt too much like a friend or sister for there to be anything more between them.

Which left....

"Lukeeeeey!" The door to the hotel room slammed open and Lucas jumped in surprise at the loud voice. It was only Kit and Zena, drunk and giggly and draped across each other as they stumbled into the room. Kit blew him a sloppy kiss at his stare. "Morning, sunshine! You really missed out at the bar."

"Oh yeah?" Lucas said, amused and a little wary. "What did I miss?"

"Henri getting fucked sloshed," Zena grinned. "You should have seen it, my god. You know how he's always careful to be mysterious and distant?" Lucas realised she was waiting for a response to what he had assumed was a rhetorical question and just nodded. There was always a sense that Henri was holding back, a guard around him that he would never lower. "Well, he certainly wouldn't shut up after five or so shots."

Lucas was horrified. "Five?"

"That was nothing," Kit said dismissively, kicking off his shoes with a little too much abandon. One knocked over the lamp sitting by his bed. "Oops. Anyway, he probably had about fifteen by the time we left and would have had more if we didn't stop him. Something seriously fucked him up, ha. Going on about how his brother hates him and nothing mattered, blah blah blah."

Lucas was unnerved at the information that his friend seemed to be going off on a bender and became decidedly more unnerved in an entirely different way when Kit pulled Zena towards the bed, kissing her rather passionately. Surely they wouldn't start having sex while he was sitting on the next bed over, in the same room? He regarded their extremely drunken states and reconsidered that. He quickly jumped off the bed when the two of them tumbled on the bed in a messy pile and averted his gaze before they could start stripping.

"Okay," he said loudly, loud enough to be heard over their flirtatious whispering. He was trying very, very hard not to listen to what they were saying and wasn't entirely successful, much to his unhappiness. "Okay, I'm leaving. Please just text me when you're...when I can come back to my room without being traumatised and scarred. Okay? Kit?"

Kit made a noncommittal sound that could have agreement or because Zena had started tugging at the hem of his shirt, tugging it off, much to Lucas' horror. He was in such a rush to leave the room without seeing anything, hand shielded over his eyes and feet half in his shoes, that he didn't realise he'd forgotten his phone in the room until the door clicked shut behind him. He stared at the closed door and considered his options. Retreat back in for his phone and risk the possibility of seeing naked bodies, even worse the naked bodies of his friends, or just accept he was going to have to survive for a few hours without it.

Because of who Lucas was as a person (see: pussy) it was an easy decision.

He wandered down the hallway to the elevator and wondered where to go now. It was pretty late, almost midnight, and he was pretty sure places such as a restaurant or the pool would be closed. The only other real option was the lobby which would have to open 24 hours for guests but the thought of sitting there alone, without even his phone to distract him, was too pathetic even for him. His next options were Loren or Henri, seeing as the upperclassmen were a hard no and laughable to even consider him hanging out with. His guess was that Henri would still be drunk and back in his hotel room and probably taking the same route drunk Kit had.

Lucas shuddered. The only thing worse than walking in on Kit and Zena was walking in on Soren and Henri because Soren scared him. Then again, so did most of the Ravens. Meaning he had to hope Loren wasn't sleeping yet and could keep him company.

He took the elevator down to Loren's floor and was heading down towards her room when he heard raised voices. He wouldn't have thought anything in particular about it, just tourists coming home late, except these voices were familiar. And sure enough, the second elevator door slid open and Aria stalked out, with Jude on her heels. Neither of them had seen him yet and judging from their strident tones they were arguing about something. Lucas' eyes widened and he did the first thing his instincts told him to — he stepped around the corner of the wall out of sight. He would have been screwed in they walked past him and happened to glance to the side, seeing him very clearly hiding, but luck was on his side. A peek around the corner revealed they'd come to a stop in the middle of the hallway.

Okay, Lucas would like to remind himself this is not something he would usually do. Eavesdropping on a private conversation that had nothing to do with him. But that inexplicable curiosity was too much for him to ignore and so, instead of continuing to Loren's room like he should have, he listened.

"...sick of it," Aria was saying, her voice raised and shaking in a way Lucas had never heard before. She sounded on the verge of tears. "I'm sick of you just running to me because of Soren. Soren won't talk to you, Soren only cares about Henri, Soren doesn't love me — "

"Shut up," Jude snapped. "Just shut up! You don't know shit about me. I'm over it, okay?"

"Like hell you are!"

"Why the hell do you care anyway? I thought it was clear. This, us — I thought it didn't mean anything. That it's not serious."

There was a sharp pause and Lucas risked peeking around the corner. Aria was facing away from him, the braid her brown hair was always pulled back into falling apart, but Lucas didn't need to see her face to know she was upset. It was obvious from the way her hands curled into fists at her side and the tense set of her shoulder. One of the first things he'd noticed about her was how open she was — not in her nature or on purpose, he didn't think, but in her face. Emotions and feelings were easy to read on her. It was clear it was no different right now.

"It doesn't mean anything," Aria hissed, jabbing Jude in the shoulder. "That doesn't mean I like being your fucking leftovers when you can't get what you want, Jude. I have self respect, unlike you."

Jude looked furious. "Oh, I'm the one without self respect? You bitch and whine and moan about being leftovers and yet never once have you said no. And do you want to know why?"

"I don't give a — "

"Because you always wanted this!" Jude was verging on yelling and Lucas winced at how the guests on this floor must be being woken up. "You always wanted me, right from our freshman year, and you were never subtle, Aria. So you should be thanking me for doing you a favour."

There was a sharp crack and Jude raised a surprised hand to his cheek, which must have been smarting from the hard slap Aria had just given him. "Fuck off," she said, her voice cracking on the last word. "Just fuck off and don't even fucking think about coming near me again, Jude."

Jude stared at her for a long moment before whirling around and stalking back to the elevator. Lucas whipped back around the corner of the wall when Aria turned around, but not before he saw the obvious glimmer of tears in her eyes. He was beginning to wonder if there was more to the complicated web of relations than pure pure physicality. That had felt like it was about a lot more than sex. Lucas felt his eyes widen as he heard a muffled sob, then another, followed by a sniffle. Almost all of Lucas was urging him to walk away, that it wasn't any of his business and that a crying girl was the last thing he knew what to do with, that he should walk right to Loren's room and pretend he'd never seen anything.

But there was a stupid tiny, mortal part of himself that told him not to be a dickhead. Walking away from a clearly upset person, no matter how much they terrified him, was a horrible thing to do.

Lucas stepped out from behind the wall and tried to think how best not to be awkward about this. "Uh, hey," he said hesitantly, and Aria's head snapped up. Loose strands of hair falling out of her braid curled around her face and her eyes were red-rimmed. "Are you...are you okay?"

"What does it look like?" She wiped aggressively at her damp eyes and regarded Lucas suspiciously. "How long have you been standing there?"

"Oh, I, um..."

"You eavesdropped," she said. "You little perv!"

Lucas started shaking his bread frantically in panic. "No, I didn't — I mean, I did, but I didn't mean anything weird by it! I'm sorry! I was already here and you guys seemed like you were, um, caught up in something and I didn't want to get in way so I..." His incessant rambling trailed off when he saw Aria was unmoved by his attempt to justify what he shouldn't have done. He was increasingly wishing he had just walked away. "Sorry. Please don't kill me."

Aria snorted. "Kill you?"

"I dunno," Lucas mumbled, his cheeks turning warm. "I watched Jude try to kill Henri once. Like, choking him and everything. Who knows what you're all capable of."

The tiny smile that had begun tugging at Aria's lips instantly vanished at the mention of Jude's name. "Don't compare me to him," she scowled. "Or I will kill you."

"Uh, got it."

"And whatever you saw...you better not breathe a word of that to anyone," Aria warned, taking a step closer to him. She was easily the shortest on the team, seeing as Alixis and Loren were tall for girls and Aria barely cleared five foot. Despite the fact Lucas had considerable inches on her he felt his hear race as she came closer. "You shouldn't have been listening in the first place, rookie. What are you even doing here? This isn't your floor."

Lucas blinked. "How do you know that?"

"I — " Aria looked thrown for a moment before huffing. "None of your business. Just answer my question."

"I came to see Loren," Lucas explained, wringing his hands. "Kit was — "

He was interrupted by the click of a door opening down the corridor and they both glanced down to see none other than Henri step out of Loren's room. Lucas wouldn't have thought anything of it if Loren hadn't appeared in the doorway at that moment, her eyes red and her face tearstained. Aria must have seen the same thing and in one quick motion, grabbed Lucas' arm and yanked the two of them out of sight around the corner Lucas had just been hiding behind.

Lucas looked at her in bewilderment. "What are you — "

"Shhh," Aria hissed, peeking around the corner. All traces of being upset had been replaced by blatant curiosity and you never would have guessed she'd just been crying if not for the faint dampness of still drying tears. "There's clearly some gossip there and I intend to hear every word of it."

"What was that about not eavesdropping?"

"When you do it," Aria said with a gleam in her brown eyes. "Do as I say, not as I do, rookie. Feel free to walk away if you don't want to hear it but shut up. I want to hear it."

Lucas should have been a good friend and walked away from a conversation that had nothing to do with him. But he'd already eavesdropped once and it was too easy not to move, especially considering Aria was very obviously not about to leave. He told himself he was doing it so he could warn Henri and Loren if Aria heard something she wasn't supposed to and attempted to swallow his guilt as he leant forward slightly to listen. Aria glanced at him with a smirk when she saw his righteousness had failed once again but didn't say anything more.

"...sorry," Loren was saying, her voice faint and trembling. Lucas couldn't see Henri's face because he was facing away from them and he was a much harder read than Aria, especially from behind. "I'm really sorry, Henri. I — "

"I already told you, we both messed up." If Lucas recalled correctly, Zena and Kit had said Henri was insanely drunk. He didn't seem that way to Lucas but he also held his liquor very well so he'd most likely sobered up. "Just...stop apologising, okay? It never happened. Nothing happened. If we aren't telling Soren, we can't ever talk about this again."

Lucas' eyebrows went up at that and Aria looked as if she was hearing Christmas was coming early at the clearly private conversation she was getting a snippet of. Whatever Lucas had been expecting to hear, it certainly hadn't been that. They definitely weren't supposed to be listening to this and if he'd been less of a pussy, he would have dragged Aria away right at that very moment. But just tapping her arm to indicate they should leave earned him a dirty look and a hissed "Shhh!" so he just fell silent.

Loren sniffled. "Yeah. Yeah, okay. But I'm apologising because if my feelings hadn't gotten in the way, this never would have been a problem. I never would have kissed you — "

Lucas' mouth dropped open and he glanced at Aria on instinct, who looked just as shocked at him. She opened her mouth but Lucas never found out what she was about to exclaim, because he instinctively clamped a hand over her mouth. She looked at him indignantly and tried to pull away but he just shook his head frantically. "Don't say anything," he whispered. "We aren't supposed to be here."

She batted his hand away. "I know that, dumbass," she whispered back. "I wasn't going to say anything."

"Just forget about it. Please." Henri rubbed his forehead with a sigh. "And I'm sorry, too. We were both drunk and I should have known better."

"That...that this was going to be happen?"

There was a drawn out pause. "I'm going to bed," Henri said quietly, neatly ignoring her question. "You should too. We have a long day tomorrow."

Loren nodded and Lucas was so immersed in the conversation that he didn't realise that Henri would be walking in their direction until the door closed. Aria seemed to realise that at the exact same moment and grabbed Lucas' wrist, yanking him so quickly back down the corridor that she nearly pulled his arm out of its socket. He barely had time to open his mouth in protest before she swiped one of the doors, yanked it open and shoved him inside. He stumbled forward as she followed him inside and the slammed the door quickly shut behind her. There was a moment of silence as they both stared at each other, waiting for Henri to call them out or bang on the door, but silence prevailed. He hadn't seen them.

"That was close," Lucas sighed, and immediately felt guilty that there was even anything that he was hiding from. "We shouldn't have done that."

But Aria barely seemed to have heard him. "I can't believe Moreau Junior is having an affair," she said, looking bizarrely gleeful about that fact. She clapped her hands together with delight. "And with Soren's cousin, of all people! Oh, this is gold. This is fucking gold. I always thought Soren was the one who was good at fucking people over but looks like the rookies this year are really something else."

"They're not having an affair. Not necessarily," Lucas added, at Aria's almost affronted expression. "It sounded like it was one kiss, a drunken accidental one. I knew Loren had feelings for Henri — "

"You did?" Aria looked interested. "How is there so much gossip between the freshmen that I haven't heard about?"

"Uh, because you hate us all and avoid spending with us as much as possible?"

"Acceptable answer," Aria shrugged. "Anyway, how do you know she liked him?"

Lucas looked at her warily. "Why do you want to know?"

"Oh, I could lie and say I'm concerned for her well-being, want to look out for her, blah blah." She waved a dismissive hand. "But we both know that isn't true and I really just find it entertaining to hear all the shenanigans going on. Life is boring, you know, but nothing like complicated human drama to make it more interesting."

"I don't think I should tell you," Lucas said hesitantly. "It was kind of a private thing. I'm not even supposed to know about it."

"Oh, come on. I won't tell anyone," Aria promised. "In fact, I find it more exciting to be aware of all the secrets within the team while no one else has any clue. Makes me feel like the knower of everything."

Lucas couldn't help cracking a smile. "Knower of everything? No offence, but you're kind of weird."

"Oh, shut up. You're the one who threw up after a couple of light drinks during hazing," Aria reminded him, to which Lucas felt his cheeks turning warm. He still got teased about that to this day and didn't think he'd ever be able to live it down. "Fine, let's look at it this way. If I tell anyone about this secret little thing between Henri and Loren — "

"There is no thing," Lucas protested, wondering himself if that was even true.

" — then you can tell people about what you saw with me and Jude," Aria continued, as if he hadn't spoken. "Deal?"

"You want us to blackmail each other?" Lucas said dubiously.

"Exactly! Mutual blackmail. Seeing as you don't trust me it's the best option for everyone."

Lucas shook his head with a bemused smile. That one person cared so much about something that had nothing to do with them — Aria was certainly a mystery in her own sense. Lucas knew he really shouldn't have but he crumbled under Aria's imploring gaze.

"Henri mentioned it once, without meaning to," Lucas said. "Kit made a joke about Loren liking him and he confirmed it. He never brought it up again and the two of them continued being friends, so I didn't think much about it, especially when it was obvious Soren and Henri were a thing."

"Maybe not anymore. That was quite a cat fight on the coach," Aria said thoughtfully. "Not to mention Moreau Junior was really going hard on the drinks tonight. What do you know about them?"

"Soren and Henri? Practically nothing," Lucas confessed. "Henri never talks about them and if someone else brings it up, all he really has to say about it is that they aren't dating. As for Soren...we don't exactly talk."

Aria scoffed. "I wouldn't take it personally. Mr Solberg doesn't ever deign to descend from his condescending perch long enough to talk to any of us unless it's to bitch and gripe at us about Exy. Making captain only made him a fuck lot more arrogant."

"But I don't understand why he isn't part of your, I don't know, gang."

Aria snorted. "Gang? What are we, knife wielders and methheads?"

"Hey, I don't claim to understand what you do in your free time," Lucas said mildly.

Aria laughed, a real laugh devoid of anything snide or petty, and Lucas was struck by how nice it sounded. It suited her, if that made any sense. Lucas knew Loren was most conventionally pretty of the three girls on the team but he had always thought Aria was the prettiest. If not for how intimidating he found and the fact that she was, unarguably, terrifying...he might have developed feelings for her. Or something.

"What's the deal between you and Jude? Not that it's any of my business," Lucas said hastily, at her expression. "Sorry, forgot I even asked. You don't have to answer that. I just meant — "

"Anyone ever told you that you talk too much?" Aria's smile was wry. "Whatever, who cares. It's not like I owe Jude anything. We hooked up a few times but I was nothing more than a rebound for him. Asshole is hung up on Soren and will never get over him. That's someone else's messed up problem now but sure as hell not mine. What about you?"

Lucas blinked. "Me?"

"All the rookies on this team seem to have a knack for getting laid," she commented, so nonchalantly that it took Lucas a moment to see where she was going with this line of conversation. "Henri is doing both of the Solberg cousins and the redhead managed to bag a cheerleader. What about you? Fucking anyone?"

"I..." Lucas could feel himself blushing. The blunt manner and the fact it was Aria asking him only made him feel more flustered. "Well, no...not exactly — "

"Wait." Aria looked suddenly delighted. "Don't tell me you're a virgin?"

"I'm not," Lucas frowned.

"Prove it."

Lucas just about choked on his spit and stared at her, certain he'd misheard. "E-Excuse me?

"Prove it," she repeated, her brown eyes gleaming in a way that only made him feel even hotter. The room suddenly didn't feel large enough yet Lucas, strangely, felt no desire to move away from Aria. Especially when she was looking at him like that. "Prove to me that you're not a virgin."

"I, uh..." Lucas swallowed, with some difficulty. There was a sudden tension crackling in the air that he was sure he wasn't imagining. "How?"

She took a slow step forward, and then another, until she was standing less than an inch away from him. Without looking away from him, she reached back and tugged the hairband free from her hair. The braid fell apart in messy, brown hair that fell around her face and cascaded past her shoulders. Lucas didn't mean to but he was lifting his hand to twist a lock around his finger. A pleased smile curled at Aria's lips as she bit her lip, with languorous deliberation, and Lucas swallowed again.

She leant forward to whisper in his ear, "Prove it by showing you know exactly what to do."

She drew back slightly, the edge of her mouth brushing his cheek, and Lucas only had to tilt his face to her lips with his own. It started slow, hesitant, but all it took was a low moan from Aria as he brought his hands up to tangle in her hair to alight that lust pooling in his stomach. His instincts took over — he deepened the kiss, his grip tightening on her, and let her lead him to the bed without breaking the kiss. She shoved him down on the bed and Lucas could only stare up at her, his chest heaving and his heart racing, as she grinned down at him.

"I've wanted to do this for a while," she murmured, sliding a hand under his shirt and dragging blunt nails up his chest.

"Really?" Lucas breathed.

"Yes, idiot." She climbed atop him to straddle him with her hips and pressed a kiss against his neck, drawing a shuddering breath from him. This was nothing like sex with Janie. It felt wild, and uncontrollable, and exciting. "If only you weren't such a shy, awkward thing. We could have started way earlier."

Lucas gripped her waist to pull her closer against him and realised, as all the clothes between them came off, that he'd wanted to do this for a while too. Maybe it was exactly what he'd wanted to do all along.