Title from Weightless by All Time Low

(Jack's POV)

"I love you," I whisper and kiss his cheek. "Should we leave this party?" I ask. He nods tiredly. I help him up and we wave to Vic before we leave.

"What time is it?" Alex asks. I check my phone.

"11:50," I answer.

"Damn, we're cutting my curfew close," he mumbles. His curfew is 12.

"Good thing Vic lives in the neighborhood next to us then," I laugh. He nods and we keep walking.

I look up at the brick wall. We have this huge wall near our neighborhood, where kids can spray paint. Once a month, someone paints over it so that it's clean. It's a nice area.

"One day we should paint something here," I say. He nods.

"How about... AG+JB?"

"Sure, maybe in the corner where they don't usually paint over well," I grin.

"Hey!" Someone shouts. I look over and a man points a gun to my head. Alex stiffens next to me.

"Hand over your phone and money-"

"I don't have any money-"

"SHUT UP!" The man hits the butt of the gun against my head. I fall over and Alex shouts. Another man grabs Alex by the hand and swings him against the wall.

"ALEX!" I jump up and the man hits me again. I crumple to the ground and see Alex. Blood flowing out of his head. Scratches. Blood.

My eyes feel heavy, I crawl over to Alex small body. I hear the robbers running away, ignoring the phones. I reach for Alex's phone, which is closer. I dial 911, my eyesight blurry from tears.

"911 what's your-"

"Brick wall- Alex is hurt-" I cry, feeling disoriented.

"Sir?"

"Rosewell Ave. Brick wall. Help," I say louder, feeling frustrated. "I need an ambulance," I shout. I put the phone one speaker and hold Alex's small body in my arms. "It's okay baby, I'm here," I whisper, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. I feel some of his blood on my lips when I pull away. I move hair out of his face, away from the cuts. Tears cascade down my face and I hold him tighter. "Alex, baby, stay with me."

I sigh from the terrible memory of that night. That night changed everything. The worst part is that those robbers had ski masks and gloves. And it was dark so I didn't see anything. This only means the police will never find them.

I sigh softly. I knew this would happen the second he lost his memories. He wouldn't remember the feelings we have- had for each other. How great that he remembers everything up until he met me.

"Jack?" I turn and see Rian and Zack staring at me. Zack comes over and engulfs me in a hug. "I'm so sorry," he murmurs.

"I don't know how long I can keep pretending," I sigh, hugging him back. Zack is really shy until you get to know him. And he's touchy, emotional, he's one of my best friends.

Rian steps forward and pats my back. He's less touchy, and quite the extrovert. But he stops acting like an asshole when you become his friend. He's loyal and all that crap too. He's probably one of the more popular people at our school. Or at least in our group.

"He'll remember one day, don't worry," Rian comforts.

"He was talking about Lisa. He doesn't remember what happened," I sigh. "Honestly, he's in for a ride," Zack shakes his head.

"How about we forget that for a minute and just chill? I think we're all stressed and need a break from this," Rian suggests. "How about pizza and video games?"

"Sounds great," I nod, along with Zack. We get up and rush to the basement. I grab the phone.

"Everything pizza?" I ask.

"Hells yeah!" Rian shouts and turns the console on. I order the pizza and we start the game.

"SHIT SHIT SHIT I'M GOING TO DIE!" I scream just as the doorbell rings. I run upstairs with money.

"Uh, JACKSON?" I hear someone boom. I look back. The pizza man looks at us weird. Rian, wearing a monocle, walks over.

"My son should not be paying," he hands the pizza man money. The man blinks and hands me the box before leaving quickly.

"I think you freaked him out," I laugh as I close the door.

"Good," Rian smirks and we walk downstairs.

"What the fuck?" I look at Zack, who's laying on the floor with no shirt and a fake mustache.

"Jackson, come over here and give your father pizza," he grumbles. I blink and throw a pillow at him. He laughs and puts his shirt back on. I kneel by him and peel the mustache off.

"OW!" He shrieks before groaning.

"Sucks to be you," I shrug and put the pizza box on the table.

"Should we invite Alex over. Maybe we should try to become friends again?" I ask.

"Okay," Zack answers, while Rian simply nods. I pull out my phone to text him.

Jack: Hey, you wanna come over? Zack and Rian are here. We have pizza and games.

Lexy ❤️: Okay. I'll ask my mom.

I pause, looking at his name for my phone. Something in my heart aches. It might never be the same. I scroll up at see our lasts texts before all this happened.

Jack: Okay, I love you

Lexy ❤️: I love you too, Jacky

I sigh shakily and click my phone off.

"Jack?" Zack watches my facial expression.

I plaster on a smile. "He's probably going to come," I say as happily as possible.

"How about we wait for him to start eating? We can just play?"

I nod and we resume the game.

In the middle of the game, my phone chimes. Zack pauses and I see a text from Alex.

Lexy ❤️: I'll be there in five.

Jack: Okay

It suddenly occurs to me that Alex can read our past texts. Something in my brain wishes he would.

"He'll be here," I say before Zack starts the game again.

Then the doorbell rings. I pause the game and run upstairs.

"Alex!" I smile and hug him. That's when I realize he doesn't love me like that anymore. I awkwardly unhug him and lead him to the basement after dragging him in and closing the front door.

"EYYY!" Rian grins with his perfect-ass teeth. Alex is shocked when Rian hugs him. "Oh- Sorry. I'm Rian," he says, obviously trying to hide he sadness.

Zack walks over and hugs Alex.

"I remember you, Zack. But..." Alex looks between Rian and me.

"We're all friends, don't worry," Zack says softly.

"How about pizza and games?" I clear my throat, desperate to change the subject. Zack nods and we start eating.

"So Alex, how are you?" Rian asks.

"I can't remember anything from the last two years. But other than that, just peachy."

"You hate peaches," Rian mutters.

"I do?" Alex raises an eyebrow.

We nod and he sighs in defeat.

"I can't even remember that?!" He throws his arms up angrily.

"Hey, it's okay. It'll take time," Zack comforts. Alex sighs and nods.

"How about we just play?" Rian sighs. Everyone nods in agreement and we start playing.

Rian and Zack leave after about an hour of gaming. To my surprise, Alex stays.

"I wish I could remember," he murmurs. "You seem so nice. And I wish I could remember who you are."

My heart aches every time I look at him. He looks down at his feet. I wish I could kiss him. Hold his hand. Hug him. Anything.

"I wish I could remember everything again," he repeats. "I'm sorry about earlier. I was just shocked about everything and I just... I freaked out."

"It's okay," I answer softly.

"Were we really together?" He asks, looking up at me.

"Yeah." I nod.

"I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"I don't feel like that anymore. I don't even know who you are. And I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault," I sigh.

"How about we get to know each other again?" He says thoughtfully. "21 questions?"

"You remember that?" I ask, wide-eyed.

"What?"

"We came up with 21 questions after our friend Awsten made a song. We decided 21 questions rather than 20 questions to be special."

"Oh. It just felt natural to say," Alex admits. "Am I starting to remember?" The corners of his lips go up to a slight smile.

"Maybe," I smile back.

"Okay. Tell me your favorite color."

"I said black. One because I'm an emo shit. And two because technically, it's a mix of all the colors."

"What is your favorite band?"

"Blink-182," I answer immediately.

"Me too," he says softly. I nod and he continues with questions.

After the questions, he knows a bunch of random facts about me. But nothing jogged his memory. But hey, at least I'm not a complete stranger to him.

"Oh shoot, it's my mom. I should go," he says, when his phone rings. He answers. "Sorry mom-" he gets cut off and raises an eyebrow before handing me the phone. "She needs to talk to you," he shrugs.

"Hello?"

"Jack?"

"Good. I just wanted to tell you how thankful I am that you're still trying. I know you love him."

"I do," I answer.

"He'll remember one day. He can stay over for the night if your parents will allow it," she says. "Can you give Alex back the phone?"

I hand Alex his phone before texting my mom.

Mom: He can stay over. It's okay.

Jack: Thank you!

Alex shoves his phone into his pocket and stares at me. "So... Can I stay?" He asks. I smile and nod. "Cool. My mom is going to drop off some stuff before she goes shopping anyway."

I nod and drag him to my room.

"We can go to the pool later if you want."

"Okay." He smiles. Just then, the doorbell rings.

"You know? We can just go now," I shrug. "You still have your swim stuff here from the last time we went out. I was going to give them to you but then- yeah," I clear my throat. Alex nods and we answer the door.

"Hi, mom!" Alex smiles. He's never been the person to hate his parents. He's always so kind and polite and perfect.

"Jack?" Alex looks at me. I blink. "You blanked out," he smiles. "Anyway, thanks mom, I'll see you tomorrow," he waves. I thank her as she leaves.

"Swimming?" I ask Alex. He nods and we run upstairs to get ready.

When we get to the neighborhood pool, we find out no one else is there. I smile and put our towels down on a chair. I turn back and see Alex.

"Jump in?" I ask.

"I don't know how to swim," he murmurs.

Oh right. He learned during the summer between Freshman and Sophomore year.

"Okay, then let's wade in the shallow end," I suggest. He nods and we walk into the pool.

"Oh shoot. I forgot the goggles on the chair."

"I'll get it," he says.

"No, I will!"

We both rush out and I get the goggles. "Aha!" I hold them up victoriously.

He rolls his eyes and starts back. I turn around to untangle the goggles from each other then I hear a scream. I turn around and look around for Alex.

"ALEX?" I shout. I drop the goggles and see him struggling at the deep end of the pool. Shit, that's 10 feet deep.

I dive in and pull my arms around his torso. I swim up and bring him to the ground. He coughs and gasps for air.

"Alex?" I pat his back.

"Thank you," he manages in between coughs. "I'm so clumsy, my god," he shakes his head. I laugh and hug him.

"Don't you dare die, Gaskarth," I mumble, still patting his back as he regains the ability to breathe normally. "How about I reteach you how to swim?" I suggest. He nods.

After about an hour of teaching him, he gets the hang of it, and it's like he never forgot.

I get out to answer a phone call from my mom and he just paddles around all cute and stuff. I have no clue how I haven't lost control and just kissed him, but I haven't.

I put the phone down and don't see Alex. I start to panic and I walk close to the pool. "Alex?!?" I shout. Before I can do anything, I'm pushed into the pool. I look up and see Alex laughing.

So goddamn cute.

He jumps in and swims up next to me.

"Swimming is fun," he smiles. I nod and chase him around the pool. 

~~~

"Your parents are nice. But I probably already knew that..." he sighs.

"Don't beat yourself up over it," I say. Putting my phone down.

"I can't help it," he shrugs.

I pat his shoulder and pull out the mattress for him. "Are you tired?" I ask. He shakes his head. "Okay... How about a movie? You probably don't remember Love, Simon."

"Who?"

"Okay, movie it is!" I grab his wrist and we run downstairs together.

"That was beautiful," he whispers at the end of the movie. We both cried when Simon's mom talked to Simon about his sexuality. I cried because that's exactly how Alex felt, and I think deep down, Alex still feels like that. Except Alex is bisexual. Then we cried again during the Ferris wheel scene.

"I know, right?" I answer.

"We should go to your room. It's already 11," he say, looking up at the clock.

I nod and we clean up, before running to my room.

After thirty minutes of getting ready for bed, we're both laying down- he's on the mattress while I'm on my bed.

"Jack?" His soft voice says. I sit up and look at him. "Can you keep a secret?" He asks hesitantly. I nod. "You promise?" He asks.

"I swear," I hold out my pinky. He smiles and crosses our pinkies.

"I think I'm bi," he whispers.

I sit across from him and hug him. "Thank you for telling me."

Sure, I already knew that, but I'd be a jerk if I said that.

"Can you keep a secret too?" I ask. He nods. "I'm gay."

"Jack, I kinda figured since we dated. I'm sorry for freaking out, but I've been keeping that secret since 7th grade."

I laugh and nod. "Seems legit."

"You're a good friend. I wish I could remember," he sighs.

"It's okay. You'll remember one day."

"What if I don't?"

I pause for a second. He's right. What if he never remembers?

"Then make new memories," I answer after thinking for a second. He nods.

"School starts in two weeks. What in hell's name am I going to do?"

"You'll be okay. All the teachers and staff know."

"I hope it'll be okay," he sighs. "Honestly, I don't want to deal with all that."

"You still have two weeks," I offer softly. He nods and leans forward so his forehead is against my shoulder.

My emotions bubble. Should I hold him? Should I say comforting words?

He looks up at me and smiles gently. "Thank you for being so patient with me," he says.

I still love you. "Always," I answer, my heart still thumping in my chest. I wish I could kiss him- or just hold him.

I feel like we broke up, except he doesn't even remember being with me. And I can't hate him.

 I could never.