Home.

My safe haven. My very own quiet sanctuary.

The only problem with that was, it also gave me time to really mull over everything that happened, and let me tell you, there was a lot of mulling over.

From the involuntary kiss of doom from Luke to possibly losing my only best friend.

I wanted to cry. Hard, loud until I emptied all the tears and stress I had inside, but for some reason, I couldn't.

Not a single tear came to my more than ready eyes.

That scared me.

I couldn't cry. Maybe I've been doing too much crying over the past few days, and I was as dry as a leaf inside.

Maybe the fact that Suzy had turned her back on me surprised me too much to shed a tear.

Or

Maybe I was finally just... Broken.

I went straight to my bedroom upon arriving home. That was about two hours ago, and since then, I've done nothing but lay on top of my bed, staring at the ceiling.

No tears.

No thoughts.

Nothing.

That's was until faint footsteps coming towards my room startled me back to reality.

"Amelia?"

Mom.

I blinked as I turned my head towards my closed door. Why on earth was she home at that time was the only question running through my mind. There was no reason for her to be there. We left together that morning. Her going to work. Me, school.

"Amelia, are you in there?"

My doorknob jerked and flew open the next moment with an unnecessary force, causing it to slam against the inner side of my wall.

I sat up and quirked my eyebrows at her. There really was no need to push the door that hard. What the heck did she think I was doing?

I stared at her. she stared at me. I wasn't supposed to be home, but neither did she.

Mom was the first one to break the silence, but before she did, she let loose a long sigh and stepped inside my room.

"Amelia, what's going on?"

"Why?"

"What do you mean why, honey?" She took a sit on my bed and run her eyes all over my face like she was trying to find out what was different about me. I didn't quiver. I didn't even blink. I looked at her dead in the eyes.

I was definitely, broken.

If that day was like any other day, before I spent my days crying and worrying about things I shouldn't even be worrying in the first place, I would have never been so defiant against my mom. I loved her, she loved me, I would have never challenged her like that. I would have been her loving little girl. I wasn't that little girl anymore. Everything I went through for the past few weeks, hell probably even month, hardened me.

"You are home at this time. I got a phone call from your principal, and guess what she told me?"

I could have guessed if I was in the mood for a guessing game. I wasn't. In fact, I wasn't in the mood for anything anymore.

"Imagine my surprise when she told me apparently, you've missed a total of nineteen classes. "

Wait what? Okay, I couldn't have guessed that even if I wanted to.

"This is not you, " she continued. "You don't miss classes. You don't miss school. So, I'm asking you now. What is going on?"

I wasn't thinking about how to answer her question. I was thinking about whether or not it was true I have indeed missed nineteen classes.

When did that number get so high? Had I really gotten that bad as to miss all those classes without even realizing it? The answer was yes. I had gotten that bad. I never, since I started school, missed a class without good reason and even that was very rare, but I had fallen off the deep end and the thing that surprised me the most was I hadn't even realized it.

"Hello," Mom's fingers snapped in front of my face. "Amelia. Are you listening to me?"

"What?" I blinked.

"You were just staring at me. "

The level of worry in her eyes was something I didn't want to see. Whatever was happening in my life at that time was not her fault, and I didn't want her to spend any second of her time worrying about me.

"Mom, I'm sorry, but I can't talk to you about this right now."

Her mouth hung open in surprise. I understood her shock. I always talked to her about things but this one, Even I wasn't sure why I didn't want to speak to her about it. I think I felt like this was mine alone to bear with.

Maybe I was at a point where I felt like things were spiraling out of my control, and I needed time to sort through all of them myself before I dropped them onto her shoulders or anybody else for that matter.

Maybe.

"What?" She pulled herself closer. "Honey, why won't you talk to me? Don't think I haven't noticed the change in you lately, I..."

"Mom, please." I raised my hands to stop her from continuing. "I just need some time to be alone and think."

She took a deep breath and furrowed her brows. "Is this about your boyfriend?"

"What? No. Maybe... I don't know, okay?" I said. Frustrated at myself and maybe with mom, I threw my hands against my face. "I just don't know. That's why I need time to think."

Mom blew out a loud, irritated sigh. "I can't help you if you won't talk to me. Amelia, if he's not good to you, then maybe you shouldn't be together."

For some reason, anger sparked inside me. See, I knew she only wanted the best for me. That is what she was trying to tell me, but I couldn't help it.

She was wide off the mark.

Was she? A little voice inside me made me hesitate.

I blinked. I wasn't sure whether that was true. That day's issues might have had nothing to do with him, but to some degree, he did have his fair share of my problems.

That was beside the point, though. That day wasn't his fault, and I just didn't want to listen to mom. Not when she was talking about Logan negatively.

The 'Maybe-you-shouldn't-be-together' quote didn't sit well with me.

Even after everything, I still loved him. Besides, he was trying to fix our problems. Not to mention, he wasn't the one who caused my panic attack in the parking lot.

I got up from my bed and strolled to my molded on the wall wardrobe, and frantically started to put things inside my backpack.

"Mom, you know what? I'm gonna spend some time at dad's."

"What?" She followed me and stood just behind me. "Baby, please, talk to me. I'm worried."

The sound of her voice. It broke. She sounded almost desperate. Mom was always cheerful, and her voice broke at that moment, because of me.

For the first time since I got home, tears beamed in my eyes, but they didn't fall.

"I'll be okay, mom, " I said, still filling my bag with a few clothes. "I just need some time to think, then I promise I will tell you everything." Turning back, I kissed her cheek before I walked out of my room towards my car.

"Amelia!" She called.

I didn't look back. I needed time to be alone. I needed a place where nobody would ask questions about whatever the heck was going on with me.

I needed time to put everything back together and try to make sense of it all. Or at least make decisions if they wouldn't make sense.

I was sure dad's place would have been able to provide me with the time and quiet I needed.

I had to get a handle of things and sort myself out before they became too much and destroy me completely.

I should have known better.

Apparently, things would never just go smoothly as long as they involved me, and... well, Logan.

*****

Well, Amelia is in quite a tight spot. Let me know what you think.

Don't forget to vote and comment.