"Allah will make matters easy in the hereafter for he who eases hardship for a Muslim." -Prophet Muhammad (P.B.U.H)

HIS PAST.

"That girl was my wife." Even though Nana wanted nothing to do more than keep quite and listen more closely and reckfully, she couldn't help the gasp that escaped her mouth. That proved that she's in autopilot. That filthy woman was his wife? Why the heck did he marry her and why is she sounding so jealous herself? Well, she's his wife after all. She has all the rights to do that.

"She wasn't like this before or so I thought." He answered her unquestioned question but that didn't stop the jealousy from consuming her being. "Let's start from the beginning, shall we?" He chuckled when she frowned, she looks very cute but he wants to see her smile, so he trace his hand to smoothen the furrow around her brow and then draw a smile with his index and thumb fingers he continued when the smile didn't move.

For some odd and unbeknownst reasons to him, he wants to tell her everything that has happened between him and that filthy woman. Is not that it's a bad past, it is but he's over it.

"I had this friend called Munir. We were really closed like twin brothers and to top it all, we were neighbours so we got to spend all our days together. I thought everything was good but damn, I was so naive to notice that. We finished our secondary and it was time to go to university. I decided that I should stop smoking, yeah, we were smoking from grade 11 to 12 and that was his doing. He said that 'smoking will take all our worries away' and those were his words. I thought, oh yes, let's chill because some other day, we won't be able to do that. I told him about my decision but he didn't agree so I continued like the sick puppy I was." He chuckled darkly.

"When my father got to know that he's the bad influencer, he withdraw his hands from paying his school fees and took me to Oxford University to separate me with him. That didn't work the first year though. He was schooling in Ahmadu Bello University Zaria but we were still very close and closer when I came back after finishing my first year. We kept on hanging through out the two months break I had and then I continued smoking. I stopped when I went to London but continued because of him. My father was very disappointed that he didn't let me come back for any break till after four years.

"I failed my first year studying international relationship because I wasn't concentrating very much. I had to drop the course and take business management even though that was not what I wanted to major in. My father was disappointed but he didn't show it because he loves me so much. My family love me so much that it broke my heart when I didn't let go of my hatred for those horrible people, which results to so many problems.

"They visited five times when I was there -the whole family- just because they don't want me to come back and meet Munir again. My father almost filed a complaint against him but I stopped him and choose to stay back in London.

"Then I met this girl, Halima, the one we met earlier. She was this innocent fellow that doesn't even talk to anyone only some few girls. She's always pushing her nose in her book or phone all the time and I always bump into her almost everyday. I didn't notice her at first but Munir told me about her. He was in Nigeria but he's telling me about someone who is in Oxford and I didn't even question how they knew each other. I get to know her for sometime, she lived in Nigeria and the same state as me and all. We started dating after a few weeks of knowing each other as she asked me out. She said she wants to try dating someone 'cause she's never dated anyone before. Of course I agreed as I thought she was a saint but darn, was I wrong.

"She also smokes! After so many pushings, I started smoking also but this time with her. Then she drugged me one night, we were sitting in her dorm and the room was all hers and uh, we slept together. Not just sleep but you know." Nana murmured Subhan'Allah underneath her breath but didn't judge. The jealousy kept bubbling inside her though. She keeps decapitating Halima's head in her mind.

"We kept doing that from then and didn't stop even after finishing University. We still did it after coming back to Nigeria and I found out that she was older than me and she's not a uh, virgin. She got pregnant and she said it was my child. I didn't argue with her and told her that we should get married but everything gets out of hand. She didn't agree instantly but called me later that day to tell me that I should send elders to her home. Everything was finalised and she was a good daughter in-law, sister in-law to everyone.

"Happily living together, we stopped smoking or so I thought she stopped but I did. After three months, her stomach started showing and Munir's visits became too much for me to bear. He always visits even when I told him that I'm not home. I caught them one day hugging each other but they brush it off that she was having a breakdown. I didn't really feel anything nor question it any further.

"The day I caught them signing some papers in my study, that was the day I finalise that they both were having an affair. They didn't argue nor feel any shame. He told me that it was a well built plan all along. They told me that that was their plan since before I went to university and now everything is accomplished. They thought they got my property papers but they didn't know that I own nothing at that time. My father refused to give me a cent till after I work for him and earn my own but then, Halima didn't let me do it. She said that no matter what, he'll give me everything. Ha, I've never been so happy about seeing anger in someone's eyes before.

"The anger in both their eyes' was worth it. They all went berserk and Halima's pregnancy was fake. It was all film. I was hurt and betrayed. He was like a brother to me and I trusted him blindly. Mashhub, you know, my best friend now always says that they look cruel but I didn't see it. I felt betrayed and hurt that it blinded my eyes with retribution. I was blinded with retribution that I didn't see my life slipping away from fingers. I was ruining my own life and not only mine, even my familys'. I stopped praying, I turned away from Allah but I never stopped praying on Fridays as my father didn't let me miss any.

"I became cold and hard in everyone. My mom cried like her life was removed from her self but I didn't stop cursing myself for trusting those people. My family members spent so many days and night praying for me but I was far too gone. I fast, yes but I still didn't feel the need to do it but something tells me that I have to do it and not for myself. After two years in self wallow, I finally evisc myself out of my own misery two years ago. So now seeing her in bad shape, I'm satisfied, he dumped her and I just know that. They flew away from the state after all that finished and his parents couldn't even look at our estate because of shame.

"I started hitting Maaysa whenever she talks nonsense and raise my voice at my parents when they ask me to stop planning against those two. I searched for Munir and Halima all around Nigeria but no luck for two years. I finally get back to myself when my father threaten to disown me. He started looking for a spouse but I'll just thwart away from the horrible women until you." He kissed her forehead before continuing.

"I'm happy that their betrayal is eating them now. But I'm still not the best Muslim out there. I don't read Qur'an anymore, I've forgotten about many azkars and I don't pray all the time. Yes, I don't play with Friday prayers but I still don't do it all the time, in the mosque. I fast also.

"I want to learn a lot from you, I want you to teach me how to do all those things again. I want to become a better Muslim and you're the only one who can help me. I don't know whether Allah will ever forgive me but I'll try my best. I've made a lot of mistakes in my life and I want to try and bring back my Tahfidh also." He chuckled when she wiped her tears hastily, not wanting him to see. Betrayal is what she hates with passion.

"Allah will always forgive you, Zayn." This is the first time she called his name and his name never sounded better.

"I hope so, mami." He kissed her forehead, leaning his head back on hers.

"He will! The door of Tauba never closes, Zayn. Let me tell you a heart touching hadith of that time when prophet Musa (PBUH) wandered in Bani Israel in the desert, an intense drought befell them. Together, they raised hands towards the heavens praying for the blessed rain to come. Then, to the astonishment of prophet Musa (PBUH) and all the other watching, the few scattered clouds in the sky vanished, the heat poured down and the drought intensified. It was revealed to prophet Musa (PBUH) that there was a sinner amongst the tribe of Bani Israel who had disobeyed Allah for more than forty years of his life, 'let him separate himself from the congregation.' Allah told prophet Musa (PBUH) 'only then shall I shower you all with rain' prophet Musa (PBUH) called pit to the throngs of humanity. 'There is a person amongst us who has disobeyed Allah for more than forty years, let him separate himself from the congregation, only then shall we be rescued from the drought.' The man waited, looking left and right hoping that someone else would step forward but no one did. Sweat poured down from his brow and he knew that he is the one. The man knew if he stayed amongst the congregation all would die of thirst and that if he stepped forward, he would be humiliated for all eternity. He raised his hands with a sincerity he had never never known before, with humility he had never tasted, and as tears poured down his cheeks, he said, 'O Allah hide my sins, O Allah forgive me.' As prophet Musa (PBUH) and the people of Bani Israel waited for the sinner to step forward, the clouds hugged sky and rain poured. Prophet Musa (PBUH) asked Allah; 'O Allah, you blessed us with rain even though the sinner didn't come forward. And Allah said; 'It is for the repentance of that very person that I bless the whole Bani Israel with rain.' Prophet Musa (PBUH) wanting to know who the blessed man is, asked; 'O Allah, show him to me.' Allah replied; 'O Musa, I hid his sins for forty years, so you think after his repentance I shall expose him?' Subhana'Allah. So you see Zayn, Allah has a remarkable way of calling you back to him. Allah's capacity to forgive is far more than the capacity to sin. We often become judgemental about someone else's sins. Is easy to laugh at the person who has fallen down but the difficult part is bending down to help that person back to his feet."

Zayn was baffled as he blink back the tears that threaten to escape from his eyes. The hadith was so heart touching that he helped his wife stand up and together they walk into the bathroom. She noticed that he is performing ablution and she also joined at the other sink.

After praying two nawafils, -true to the saying; 'worry ends when Salah begins', they both raised their two hand to pray to Al Hasib, Al Mujib, Al Wāsi.

"O' Allah, don't let us turn away from You, no matter how many trials and difficulties You test us with. Let these difficulties serve to make us stronger Muslims and more sincere to You."

"O' Allah! I hope for mercy, do not leave us for even the duration of an eye blink and correct our total condition. Besides You, there is none worthy of worship."

After that, they both say their azkar and went to bed with sated hearts, wrapped in each other's arms as they let their heart beats serve as a metronome.

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Salam!

How are you all doing? So everything is starting to unravel itself with time! Her memories o. That is just his past up there but whatever! So he was even married before, whattheheck! Lemme kuku come and run. Don't forget to VOTE COMMENT and SHARE please. . .
QOTD: What do you think about Zayn's past? That hadith up there? Who hates Halima? Should we have more of her? Your thoughts about Zayn? Did his past change his picture in your head? What do you think?!

Bye!
Aishatu⭐