I woke up showered and put this on:

I made my way to the studio, I still had enough time before I started to cook. I started my stretches, I was thinking what should I do, I still had a lot on my mind. So I went with something new
Reign, Hana & Lisa joined me. Hana & Reign teamed up, me and Lisa decided on solos.

Hana & Reign went first, lil by little the boys started coming in. I just stayed by observing them, they didn't see me of course I was in the rafters. Lisa went after, of course she had to twerked. I giggled, I hung upside when it was my turn always making an entrance. Being the shortest of the girls tho, did have it's advantages. Anyways it was my turn, I was just messing around like always. I got like it was nothing, I saluted them then walked out. I started humming my way to the kitchen, then I started to sing anyways:

I stopped having hut that one note, turning around to see I had followers. May I help you? I said. I'm going to cook dinner, if your going to help I need onions and bell peppers cut, I need someone to make 8 cups of rice in this rice cooker don't add a lot of water cos it will be to mushy, you know what Unnie you got the rice, you know how I like it.

I need a few boys to setup 3 tables outside, Kookie you get the drinks and ice just ask Alexa. I washed my hands turning on the fryer, I started the fried chicken. Xander & Haley came running I gave them each a sample. Unnie, it's better than mommies. I laughed be nice, or I'm telling your ma.

Alexa please play Best List Ever: I smiled to myself, only people who would know this list would be both my Unnie's. They came in with tears in their eyes, I nodded my head as they engulfed me in hugs. It was our song KiraKuni, I asked Reign if her boys know it, she said no. I laughed she asked me and Hana how about your peeps. YAH, let's perform it for them. Alexa, raise the mini stage in back please.

I finish frying the chicken then I do the meat next, the rice is done the vegetables cut. I put the meat & vegetables on the flat grill I have outside, I skipped the song for now, the girls looked at me then the boys laughed when GOT7 started to sing Superman.

They looked up, wondering what's so funny, I asked Oppa to take over. Alexa, instrumental please. The girls falling in line when I sang and danced. Jaw drop, I giggled that's what you guys looked like (BTS) when I did it at the studio.

I took over again from Oppa, I was smiling because I was happy in this moment. Like nothing could bring me down, Xander brought out the rice and plates, Haley brought out the chopsticks & forks. Reign ran inside for the cherry peppers. Foods ready come get your food, I made Haley & Xander a plate. Sorry guys but kids get first dibs, that's how I roll. I already made my boys their plates, they went to the table. I grabbed my plate, then went in the house. I put it on the counter, I went to the room to change i felt so sticky. I changed into this:

I grabbed my food coming back out, Unnie's your clothes are on my bed.

Hana's:

Reign's:

I was going to go cute but, this is our style which I know someone would appreciate our shoes. I looked up at Kookie who winked at me, I got up slowly. I threw away my plate, I was done. I don't play with my food, shit I love food just as much as the boys. I drank my water, I threw my bottle behind me in the recyclables bin without looking. I walked to the middle of the stage, Reign & Hana walked up. We bowed Alexa please play track 2.

Kirakuni Lyrics

[Intro:]
Stressin' bout directions
But you never wanna wait on it
Shopped for everything you wanted
Got it and you hated it
Makin' yourself happy with material things
That makes you crazy

[Verse 1:]
Workin' hard
Nine-to-fivin' is all about the sweat
Rikai dekinai
Tell me how do you deal with that stress
Getting paid
Now do you ever have time to just do you
Got it made
But when the money's gone
What you gon' do?

[Pre-Chorus:]
Stressin' bout directions
But you never wanna wait on it
Shopped for everything you wanted
Got it and you hated it
Makin' yourself happy with material things
That makes you crazy

Chorus:]
Let's go out tonight
So we can have a good time
Don't want you to be uptight
We can do anything u like
You need to
Chill out and let go sometimes
Feel free to let yourself say
Kirakuni
Take it easy
Throw your hands up if you feel me
Slow it down
And turn the music up
Come on its party time
Start dancing and you'’ll smile
If you just
Chill out and let go sometimes
Feel free to let yourself say
Kirakuni
Take it easy
Your troubles away

[Verse 2:]
Kick back relax
If wanna unwind
Loosen up let your body decompress
Tossin' and’ turnin’'
Make you calm when you’re feeling restless
Leave all your problems
Cause this party is your oasis
Now all you need is a tight fit
Hot music
And a few friends with smiling faces

[Pre-Chorus:]
Stressin' bout directions
But you never wanna wait on it
Shopped for everything you wanted
Got it and you hated it
Makin' yourself happy with material things
That makes you crazy

[Chorus:]
Let's go out tonight
So we can have a good time
Don't want you to be uptight
We can do anything u like
You need to
Chill out and let go sometimes
Feel free to let yourself say
Kirakuni
Take it easy
Throw your hands up if you feel me
Slow it down
And turn the music up
Come on its party time
Start dancing and you'’ll smile
If you just
Chill out and let go sometimes
Feel free to let yourself say
Kirakuni
Take it easy
Your troubles away

[Bridge:]
You never know unless you try
To break out of the day to day grind
So tonight leave it all behind
When hear the music just get into it
Find out what it feels like to be free

[Pre-Chorus:]
Stressin' bout directions
But you never wanna wait on it
Shopped for everything you wanted
Got it and you hated it
Makin' yourself happy with material things
That makes you crazy

[Chorus:]
Let's go out tonight
So we can have a good time
Don't want you to be uptight
We can do anything u like
You need to
Chill out and let go sometimes
Feel free to let yourself say
Kirakuni
Take it easy
Throw your hands up if you feel me
Slow it down
And turn the music up
Come on its party time
Start dancing and you'’ll smile
If you just
Chill out and let go sometimes
Feel free to let yourself say
Kirakuni
Take it easy
Your troubles away

Lisa, Wendy & Euhna joined in after the first verse. I think the boys forgot that I can sing and rap in Japanese. I see jaws drop from left to right. I was just smiling tho, the choreo was simple more girly. Which I'm not use to but I start to remember it.
We finished, I went back inside holding my chest. I grit my teeth, trying not to cry out, I stumble holding on to the wall. When I see Jimin, when I grabbed his hand I said one word: "Meds!"

I woke up in a bed, with a Jimin and Kookie snuggling me. I look up to see a hard look at Suga, he didn't look to happy tho.

[Suga's POV]
I stared at her, why must we feel like this. How could you do this to us? How dare you forget your meds!! I.. got up & left I didn't want to say anything I would regret.

[Luna's POV]
Alexa, did I forget my meds today, No Luna you didn't. I think with you doing choreo you haven't done in awhile or trying to do moves that isn't your style anymore made your heart pump a lil abnormal. Oh! I need some air, I can't I think I'm going to have another panic attack. I haven't had one in a long time.

I get up to put on this:

I wrote a note saying I'm in the studio on the roof I also told them to watch this morning video feed, I didn't forget my meds! I wouldn't do that, when I have more than one meaning to live. What Suga said hurt more than ever!!!

I walked up, the stairs with hesitation, I wasn't to sure if I should dance but I had to with the feeling of a panic attack happening, I'm hurting right now.

I need the release, I made sure it was bumping. I ran quickly thru the routine adding a few things here and there. I put it on instrumental, I sang my heart out. Everything I was feeling I put into this one performance. I was crying thru everything, I walked to my guitar, I set my mic up facing the windows. I turned off the music, I took a breath. I played what was coming into my mind. I was sad because I let him down in a way, so I sang. The only thing that could help me right now, I knew no one could get in unless they had the password, which be Oppa and RM.

What I didn't expect was when I turned around, 2 very mad Oppa's and a pissed off Reign. So you know what I did I couldn't care right now. WTF, do you want now? How much more are you going to fucking lecture me. What about my feelings huh?! You only care WTF your feeling! Did you know I was accused of not taking my meds this morning! Alexa, wall down now, fuck you guys I don't need this. I'm a fucking adult not a fucking kid, I'll be back maybe. I flipped off the roof, running to my bike and peeling out, only thing on my mind was: Am I that much of a burden?????

Comment
Share
Vote

Till next time my lovelies