#15 You don't love me like I do...

AN: I probably should've split this chap. it's somewhat long...

***

"Why?" Guk-doo stares at Bong-soon for a moment, then understanding dawns on him. "Let's get" he says, swiftly changing gears.

She joins him in the car's front. The drive starts off smoothly amidst the sparse traffic on the roads. As the lull that settled in the air around her oozes a sense of comfort, she allows herself a sigh. The rapid rhythm of her day life has caused her to overlook the troubles that await her at home during the night. No more nights of suffering for her. She will have to move out of her home, as she decided last night.

This has been a long time coming. Ma's comments, like the neighbours', are twisted and far from amusing. Boo to all of that!

"The neighbourhood is curious about your daughter's whereabouts. Where does she go? Why is she surrounded by strange men? What does she do for a living? Why are the policemen patrolling the outside of your house?"

Ma couldn't answer any of those questions. Pa and Bong-gi couldn't console her.

Dispelling the mental image of her mother venting out her frustrations, Bong-soon focuses on the road. The icy wind from the car window playing with her hair only reinforces her resolve. Tough decisions are crucial for moving forward in life. Right now, she's at the juncture.

Unlike the other times when she made a nerve-wracking choice, this time there's calm accompanying her action. She wonders why that is. Has she evolved, or is it Guk-doo's presence? Maybe both. Plus, now I have a job. This is for the good. Ma can ignore the rumours. Pa and Bong-gi won't suffer the consequences of my work.

Guk-doo keeps his eyes on the road, hands on the steering. Occasionally he takes in the state of his companion, the way her eyes mirror every emotion in her heart. She must have a reason to not go home. How does he comfort her? Her mind is too occupied to realise he's observing her. Well, let's see. Our destination is close.

He swerves the steering wheel to the right, and her eyes widen in surprise. She straightens up and glances at him. He has a teasing word or two for her.

Finally noticed, have you? Yet he chooses not to say them aloud, opting for a slight smile. He's been on a different road, not the one to her art studio. They pull to a stop outside a ritzy diner.

"Let's get some dinner, hm?"

That's all he says, getting out of the car, shutting the door and walking ahead. Bong-soon wonders if it's his way of comforting her. It must be, she concludes as she trails him, and freezes as they step into the restaurant.

It's not only a ritzy place decked up with glamourous golden lights, oozing elegant French vibes, but given the hour, everyone dining in the spacious hall are couples out on a dinner date! Seeing them cosying up to each other, sharing a good meal and laughter, oblivious to the world around them, puts some redness in her cheeks. Bong-soon coughs and looks away, gawping like a fish, trying to get the words out. Any words. Just form the sentence-

Guk-doo's lips press into a thin line at the scene before him. Couples on late night dates and these many? People have time to frolic around, don't they? Despite knowing that's a pretty cynical statement he mentally uttered, he can't withdraw. His eyes sweep the hall again. A few empty tables here and there. His gaze shifts to his companion, and he immediately detects her unease.

"Well... I thought you'd like this place, but let's find another."

Bong-soon finds his bright smile blindingly attractive as he adds, "I didn't know this was a favourite date destination. Come, I'll show you to my favourite place. You're hungry, aren't you?"

The boyish enthusiasm of his is something she hadn't witness since their school days. She sure is famished. How long will her empty stomach hold it in? She had plans to make do with instant ramen in her art studio tonight. But dining with Guk-doo is a better idea. Her discomfort fades as she follows out with a chuckle.

They drive to another eatery nearby. Ra-bowl, a small ramen shop at the end of a street, a few blocks away from the sidewalk. Guk-doo parks his car in a free parking space and they cross the rest of the short distance on foot.

The ramen shop is more lively than the restaurant, packed with men. Colourful LED lanterns throw muted glow across the space outside. The chatter filling the air is all cosy. The seats inside are wholly occupied, the chatter filling the air is all cosy. With soft Japanese music playing in the background, there are smiles all around. The chefs, the staff, and even the patrons.

Not that he prefers seated indoors; Guk-doo finds an empty bench to sit down and pats the space next to him. Bong-soon finds the cool air and ambience of this place more enticing than the one before.

"This place was what I had in mind at first... But as you see," Guk-doo gestures to the surroundings, "there will only be men here and... I thought you'd feel uncomfortable and... I made you uncomfortable, anyway."

He utters the last words with a bit of guilt. She chuckles in the wake of affection rising in her chest. Her feelings never change, do they? She's still so taken by this guy right here. Though she won't admit it again for a good while. Not even to herself.

"Guk-doo." She plops down next to him on the bench where they place orders. The words slip out of her mouth on their own accord after the server leaves them alone. "I'm not comfortable at all. Because you're here with me."

She flushes, having admitted her honest feelings at the moment, and breaks into a bright smile. The smile appearing on Guk-doo's face is a mix of bashfulness and understanding, some awe and wonder.

Though their meal is regular ramen with Thai curry, it tastes exquisite. That's their shared opinion. Their casual banter soon turns to a fun conversation about school days and to their spy work at the MP's mansion. In a roundabout way, they discuss things that no-one understands. No one's paying them attention. Everyone busying themselves with their meal and a lively conversation with their partner.

***

"Thanks for today..."

Outside her art studio, Bong-soon smiles at Guk-doo once more. He had an option to drop her and drive away. But here he is, walking her to her home. It's a shame that there's such little distance to cover. And though his car is parked in a paid parked so close, he can hop into it and drive away.

"So..."

Hearing him attempting to speak, she looks up at him. He strikes quite the figure, tall, lithe, both hands poised at the hips in a confident gesture. Wind whips the edges of his jacket, dislodges his usually brushed-back bangs. Pretty relaxed hairstyle for a cop not on duty. It's midnight, with only a passing motorcycle or two, and the distant of a patrol vehicle from somewhere. She basks in the moment's serenity until he clears his throat.

"Have you told Uncle Do of this change?"

"No."

She's startled by the sudden question but answers it over her shoulder and unlocks the door.

"I will now. He's familiar with me coming home late. It's 12 am. I expect he's awake now. He's been staying up late waiting for me. And also working on some new recipes for Walnut Pie."

Her whisper comes laced with a bit of guilt. Guk-doo doesn't speak, and she only hears the tapping of his fingers across his phone. His phone speaker when he turns it on, the loud ringer going as she swirls around to face him.

"Huh? At this hour. Oh, Guk-doo-ah?" A calm voice echoes from the depths of the electronic device held Guk-doo's in his hand.

Bong-soon's eyes widen. That was her pa's voice. Guk-doo rang Pa? That was fast!

"Mr Do, Bong-soon is staying at her art studio tonight and I'll be her guard. Don't worry, yeah. Sure, yes ,you can speak to her..."

Guk-doo passes his phone to her. In a whirlwind of a conversation that follows, she explains to her pa why she's staying back.

"I want to focus on art, Pa. Give myself to my new job. Also, not listen to Ma say 'why have you come home at an odd hour again...'"

Lame excuses, but half valid, she's sure.

"I will explain properly when we meet next..."

She heaves a breath, hearing Pa sigh and concede on the other end. The call ends with a beep and she passes the phone back to Guk-doo.

"Thanks again, Guk-doo-ah. He's reassured because of you, I'm sure. But that was sudden! Give me a warning, won't you? Phew-"

She kicks her shoes aside and turns on the lights of the studio. Flinging her sling bag across the couch, she ties her short hair into a loose pony. She's taking off her coat when she notices Guk-doo is still lingering near the doorway, looking like he has a few words to say. Huh, why is he removing his shoes, too? She blocks his entry before he can cross the threshold.

"Why're you coming in? You're not invited in!"

Guk-doo ignores the woman with her arms stretched before him and throws a look back at the street, frowning at a figure passing by at a distance. Bong-soon didn't notice but he did. He's been pacing back and forth across the side walk on the street. A neighbour wearing a mask strolling the storefronts, wouldn't have been suspicious if it were to happen in the daylight. But now at the witching hour...? Suspicious as hell.

The slight push Guk-doo feels on his chest causes him to shift his attention. Bongsoon is trying to shove him off, her delicate palms splayed across her jumper. He'd definitely have preferred this in a different scenario, ahem. Yeah, she doesn't know about the mysterious stalker. The guy could be his business. Should he chase after him? If he did and that was a distraction to reach Bongsoon, then... Right, I need to protect Bong-soon... You want me gone? Too bad, I can't leave you alone. I can't tell you whats going on and stress you out further, and I can't leave you when you're clearly distressed. You looked upset in the car. Just how much did you endure at your home to arrive at this decision?

"Bong-soon, did you forget I guard you at night?"

"Can't you do that from outside?" She glances at him, brows furrowed. He

"In this blighted cold?"

"Huh, I thought you said you were used to it."

"Not tonight."

Bongsoon screams the words, grinding her teeth. "Not tonight?" As if that reason is enough to invade someone's quarters at this hour! Yep, bodily blocking Guk-doo is just impossible. His hands catch hold of hers before she can shove him out. She still tries to make the most of her momentum forward and so does he. The result: their legs get tangled and they fall to the floor, her on top of him.

"Offf, Goddd! Release me!" She cranes her head and looks at him as his arms come up on either side of her, gripping her shoulders. An impulsive action, perhaps. But unacceptable! His gorgeous face can't convince her to stay in this moment for longer. Not with the way her heart beats at an astronomical speed.

He looks at her in surprise, mouth opening and closing, trying to make sense of what's occurring. This wasn't a part of his plan.

"Let go of me, you pervert!"

She tries to wiggle out. Without thinking, he tightens his grip.

"Pervert?"

He raises an eyebrow, repeating the word. Something inside him has snapped. He's sure Bongsoon can can tell that much.

"That's the second time you're calling me that." His tone is both playful as it's accusatory. His lips curve into a rakish grin. "Hey, if I'm a pervert, I won't let you go, right?"

His arms around her loosen only to tighten in a more meaningful way, so he can snugly fit her in his arms. He's not sure how to feel. Tough love? This is his way of consoling her. How does he express? And pervert, she surely isn't serious while using the term against him, is she? Also, what's he doing inside? He sure was planning on leaving after having a little chat about her new living quarters. And guard her from outside.

"Ahh you're hugging me!!? I say, release me!" You can't have your way with me! With a mighty cry, Bong-soon digs her elbow into his chest. Cool. She's managed a light, awkward movement without knowing how.

That's enough to get a reaction out of him. He winces, but uses the momentum to flip them around. She's on the floor while he's above. He tangles his legs with hers and catches her wrists. Pinned by his pointed gaze, she's powerless, staring at him as he half hovers above her.

"Now, what more moves do you have to shove me off?"

The lazy drawl in his voice, those dishevelled bangs and the roguish smirk. She wants to scream, declare that it's illegal for him to look this attractive. His eyes meanwhile scan every part of her face, as if he's committing them to his memory.

"I'm a perverted man, as you say. Aren't I? Shove me off..."

She presses her lips together. Strange, he's practically above her, but she doesn't feel him pressing into her. It's like he's still sticking to the boundaries between them in a more dangerous way. Is it a weird yoga pose? At least we are not chest to chest - Ugh, I'm not afraid, no. How can anyone stay calm like this?!

"Guk-doo!" She tries freeing her arms and legs in vain. "You can't use your brute strength."

"Well, I am..."

"Guk-doo!"

He continues to smile despite her glare. "Bong-gi tells me you train with him in taekwondo every day. Throw me off."

She tries, but it doesn't work. Eventually, her limbs are too tired from trying to break free. She heaves a sigh as her back hits the floor with a thud.

"You should train with me. Not Bong-gi."

He goes on with a triumphant grin, unaffected as she continues to glare.

"Bong-gi is a doctor. He can't be a tough guy. So train with me. What? You need to train. Especially as you're involved with the affairs of the PD and Black Wrestlers. Now let's go to sleep. A long day awaits us tomorrow-"

That's where we're going with this? Bong-soon can't believe what she heard. Just like that, her arms and legs are free to move again. Only for a moment.

Guk-doo lies on the floor and pulls her to him in a one-armed hug. Her face rests on his chest, one arm holding onto his shoulder. It's almost as if she's nestled into him as they prepare to sleep. While her mind screams not a couple-y posture again, his remains strangely at peace.

"Guk-doo. Let me go!"

Why Should I? Girl, pull away if you must. He tightens his grip on her although not much. She can't move an inch. Is this all her strength? He smiles, closing his eyes. The words that leave his lips don't line up with his true feelings. But this is how he is, turns out he's the type to tease the girl he likes.

"I'm perverted, aren't I? I won't let you go. Let me recharge. You're my recharging port."

"Huh? How's that possible? I'm human."

"..."

Bong-soon hears no response from him. She can't process his words, has no idea what's going on in his head or how he feels. This amount of closeness is nerve-wracking. She doesn't hate being held like this. It's just things haven't been sorted between them to arrive at this point. They are still friends, aren't they?

"Guk... Ahh, is he asleep already? Ah, this would be a hug between friends if we're not lying down or who can say? Ugh, I can't sleep on a block of rock! No softness whatsoever! Wh-what am I saying? I can't sleep on a hard mattress! Guk-doo, wake up!!"

No amount of talking does the job. A few minutes pass. Her fault. She can't bring herself to shriek and wake somebody who's fast asleep.

"Eh, he's sleeping while my heart is going a mile a minute?" She murmurs as his steady heartbeat drums in her ears. It's fast but otherwise soothing. He's always so uptight. And now he's truly relaxing.

His arms relaxed by sleep, loosen enough for her to pull back. She stares at him for a good second when he opens his eyes.

She doesn't know he does it. It happens in one fluid moment. He gathers her in his arms and shoots to his feet. Like superman shooting to the sky? Not a bad imagery. Just a lot slower and gentler. He lowers her to the couch and tucks her in.

"Sorry, I almost fell asleep. Your presence was so soothing. I'll take the floor." He locks the door and lies down on the floor after turning off the lights. He brings his forearm to cover his eyes, letting off a sigh. Sorry that was a lie, I wasn't asleep but just... It felt do good to hold you close. I couldn't let you go... His thoughts race which he silences with inhaling a few deep breaths.

Silence stretches between them in the semidarkness, punctuated by the sound of the wind rustling the trees outside, an occasional vehicle passing by. Bong-soon lies on her back on the couch with her eyes closed. It's cold in the art studio. Like Gukdoo said, "blighted cold". She drapes her blanket tighter around herself with a soft grunt. The minutes tick by slowly as she processes the events of the night. She was stubborn and stuck to her decision of turning her back on her home, but the truth is that it hurt. She did feel lonely and Gukdoo must have sensed that. Taking her restaurant and now "keeping" her company in his own way... those are his kind yet awkward gestures of taking care of his best friend. The woman he loves, as he claims.

As her body grows warm and so does her heart, Bong-soon realises 'someone else' is more in need of the blanket than her. Unable to sleep, she rolls to her side and watches Guk-doo sleep. Its been a good half an hour since his breathing evened out. He looks so peaceful, sleeping. Pretty and innocent. N

"You must be doing this only to protect me. Guk-doo-ah, only if you're less forceful, people can understand your true motives. Well, I have always understood you regardless... But you're so... unfair. It's unfair because I still..."

With a shake of her head, she cuts off her whisper and gently drapes the blanket over him. Lying back on the sofa, she hugs herself after covering herself with her heavy coat.

Ah, I gotta stop my feelings from gushing forth. Yeah, you don't love me like I do, Guk-doo. What am I saying? You haven't even said you loved me. Oh, if only there can be confirmation...

Bright sunlight from the windows awakens her the following morning. Normally she wouldn't be able to sleep with sharing a room with someone, but this someone is Gukdoo and she still is comfortable with him, and trusts him enough. He's still sleeping!

"Hehe. So cute. I can't be mad at him." She watches his sleeping face illuminated in the morning light with a smile. His gun is on the floor next to him, his wallet and car keys as he curls into a ball, hugging the blanket she threw at him last night.

"Sleeping so soundly, you must be tired."

She checks the time on her smartwatch and shakes him by the shoulders, kneeling next to him on the floor

At first he doesn't respond, then he seizes her by the shoulders and shoves her to the floor, looming over her menacingly. While her jaw drops at the sudden turn of events, he blinks and realises she's not his potential opponent in battle. Brushing his bangs, he pulls back and mutters a sorry.

"Sorry, I thought it was a... I deal with criminals all the time, and... Sorry..."

She heaves the breath she's been holding in, slowly sitting up. That was unexpected, but... hot... you've got a hell of reflexes. But aren't you a split second slow?

Outside, the sun is shining brightly and now what? They are running late. Realising the situation they are in, she shoots to her feet. "Guk-doo!"

Tghe sheepish look on his face gone, Guk-doo springs to his feet, sensing the urgency in her voice. "Ah, hell! No time for breakfast or anything. We both have to go to the MP's place. Think I can borrow your shower?"

Bong-soon blinks speechless at the rapid fire question. But then this is how things are with him-

"Is there a shower here, Bong-soon?"

Bong-soon sighs. "Of course, there is a shower in the back. And shower gel and spare toothbrushes in the cabinets inside!"

She shows him the way, which is pretty easy to figure out, anyway.

"I don't have a change of clothes and there's no time," Guk-doo mutters, dashing into the shower and shutting the doors. "What a pain. And no doubt your shower gel will smell flowery!"

"These are some circumstances," she mutters as she returns to the couch. "Are we living together? Well, I won't leaving this place and Gukdoo doesn't want to leave my side. Fantastic. I need a change of clothes, too. Just convince Pa and get my stuff here. What's there to convince Pa? He'll agree if he knows Gukdoo is watching over me. Will he agree if he's living with me? Wait, is he even living with me?"

Guk-doo returns as she murmurs to herself. Freshly showered, but in the same clothes. He brushes his slightly damp bangs with a hand and gestures to her. "Sorry to interrupt your daydream. You have exactly one minute to freshen up!"

"Oh cut it, you freaking dictator!" Agitated, Bong-soon follows his example of running into the shower. As warm droplets of water run down her body, she commits to her mind this is a new routine building. She surprises herself by smiling while saying this, "heh, he can be such a prick sometimes. But getting to be with him this way... It's not bad at all..."

Outside, Guk-doo takes a moment to centre himself before he plunges into the hectic day that awaits him. A similar smile as Bong-soon's graces his lips at the bizarre situation he's found himself in. He can't believe he stayed all night in the same room as Bongsoon. He slept so well too... just soothed by her light. Sure he dreamt of chasing a criminal and even jumped on her but... We've arrived here all because you're unpredictable, Bong-soon. Why'd I hold you close, tease you or make fun of you? I don't know if I'd been like that in the past. Our high-school days seem so far away. But I think if I ever had fun while being as studious as I was, it was with you... It was so reassuring to have you. Your presence was a granted. And then I turned more studious and more ambitious as a cop...

You... I've always treasured you. And you've always brought out the sides of me I never know existed. He wipes the moisture from his bags with his kerchief. Our life has been so unpredictable. We've been friends all along. And now we have these unaddressed feelings for each other. And we're working together on a case... What comes next? Will we be together always? You call me a pervert but... that's not truly how you view me, right? You still love me, don't you? Don't say you can't. I don't know if I can take it... Ugh, how do I even put these feelings in words?

He hears the door opening and tells himself to switch to duty mode. Bong-soon enters his view, donning the same outfit as last night.

"What? Wardrobe malfunction?" he asks, keeping a cool facade as if his thoughts weren't racing earlier.

"I don't keep spare clothes around the house," says Bong-soon. " So I'm in the same situation as you. I thought in advance but didn't pack."

"Great. Though it repulses me, clean linen can last for an extra day. Let's get changed later on."

His wrist alarm beeps as he reaches for her hand. A second alarm after he's up. This one means time's up.

"Ugh, run, Bong-soon!"

He grabs his car keys and pockets his revolver, all the while hanging onto her hand. They dash out of the studio after she locks the door. If she has any objections to his proposal of living together at the art studio, she has no opening to discuss it. He doesn't know if they are even living together. He can't confirm, given his duties, but whenever he's around as her escort, he can keep her company. Like he did tonight, so she won't be lonely.

His eyes fall on the childish scratches on the bonnet of his car. Was it the man pacing the street who scratched it? Bongsoon appears mortified by the sight of it. He lets go of her hand and pats her shoulder.

"Happens to cops all the time. Some noob of a criminal with a grudge does things... Let'stake the train. I will tell Do-youngto scan the vehicle for any other threats and also fix those scratches."

Bong-soon nods sympathetically then her stomach growls.

"Bongsoon, this early in the morning?"

Gukdoo grabs a couple of energy bars he keeps in the car and hands her one. As they walk to the station, he munches on his - oats dark chocolate and raisin one, Bong-soon enjoys her orange oatmeal one. Energy bars are their only breakfast option this morning. A long day awaits them at the MP's mansion.

***

AN: That's all for now! So Jisoo returning to us fans (posting on his social) has propelled me to work on this chapter really quickly <3 I'm excited and hopeful about his future <3

Also if you're struggling like him, like me and many others, hang in there... Let's all make our dreams come true. <3

In case someone's reading.. Pls vote n comment <3

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