Chapter 13

Ugh. My heading is killing me. What the hell happened last night? Where am I? Did Nathan bring me home?

I groaned and pushed the plush pillow off my face before forcing myself up. My head felt like it weighed a ton of bricks and getting off the bed didn’t go as well as I’d hoped. I quickly lost my balance as soon as my feet hit the floor and grabbed on to the first thing my hands could touch.

I steadied myself on the nightstand and for a few brief seconds before trying to walk again. I was relieved when I finally made it to my in room bathroom and closed the door behind me. Within seconds of my confinement I took a speedy drive down the porcelain highway with my hung over the toilet.

My breath was ragged and labored and my stomach hurt from the heaves. Not to mentioned my raging headache that was becoming increasingly worse. It was my solemn vow that from this day forward I would never drink so much ever again. It just wasn’t worth the consequences that came after the night of fun.

When I felt confident it was safe to remove myself from the bathroom floor I pushed myself up and faced the sink.

The cool water refreshed me after being splashed over my face. It gave me a cold awakening and much needed awakening.

“I see you’re up,” Nathan said.

I turned to face his voice in the doorway and nodded at him. “Yeah. I’m still drawing a few blanks about last night though. Fill me in?”

He stepped further inside the room and sighed.  “You weren’t yourself.”

His voice sounded like he was sending me a warning, but I had to know the truth. I needed to know exactly how much I had embarrassed myself.

“I want to know,” I insisted. “I can handle it.”

He stood in his strait, professional and serous stance and crossed his arms over his chest. His blue eyes bored into mine. I felt like an errant child about to be lectured for something I didn’t know I had done.

“You hit on the bar tender, danced inappropriately with a random stranger and asked me to kiss you. I don’t think those things would have happened if you had not drunk so much.”

My eyes widened in utter surprise at his confession and I couldn’t bear to look at him any longer without the guilt and embarrassment. I turned my head away from him.

“I…I don’t know what to say,” I admitted. “That doesn’t sound like me.”

“No. It doesn’t.”

I walked to my closet, still keeping my eyes off of Nathan, and pulled a top and pair of jeans out, my comfort clothes. I had no intentions of going out today as I’m sure I’d be nursing a hangover throughout most of the day.

I closed the closet door behind me, confining myself to the small room and slipped into my clothes. When I stepped out Nathan was there waiting for me still sporting his serious composure.

“Don’t look at me that way, Okay? I know you’re disappointed. You’re not so great at hiding it.”

He looked down at his crossed arms and straightened them out while clearing his throat. “I’m not disappointed, Peyton. I’m confused. As much a people claim that they have no control over their actions when they drink I believe differently. They act on things that they are normally inhibited by, things they don’t normally have the courage to do.”

I furrowed my eyebrows up at him and frowned. “What are you trying to say, Nathan? That I have some desire deep inside of me to kiss you?”

“I don’t know. You tell me.”

That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard. I have no desire to be anything more than friends with him. It’s easier…better that way. It’s uncomplicated. Just the way I like it. Sure my thoughts may have wondered what it would be like, but I could never give in to my thoughts. It was too risky.

I shook my head at him and slowly backed away. I turned to face the bedroom door when I reached it.

“I can’t do this now. I need to nurse this headache and hydrate.”

I speed from the room in a rushed walk until I reached the dining room down below. Amelia already had breakfast sitting on the table waiting for me. I sat relieved in my usual spot.

She stepped from the kitchen with a pitcher of orange juice in her hands and greeted me with a friendly smile.

“Late night?” she guessed pouring me a glass.

I nodded and took a sip of my drink. “That’s an understatement.”

“I guess that’s why you’ll need these,” she said holding out her hand with two tiny brown pills in it. “Nathan said you might.”

Of course he did. He’s always trying to take care of me. Or…he used to anyway.

“Thanks,” I smiled taking them from her head and downing them.

She nodded and her eyes flashed to something behind me and she smiled again.

“Pancakes and fresh fruit, Mr. Holbrooke?” she asked.

“Yes. Thank you.”

He took a seat at the table in front of me and I tried very hard to avoid his stare on my face. Only the clinking together of silverware could be heard between us as we remained silent. Neither of us bothered to speak to each other through the remainder of breakfast.

I spent my day by the heated outdoor pool that was shaded over with large trees. It was just what the doctor ordered for a hangover. The cool breeze swept over me as I emerged from the water and covered myself in a soft white towel. With Nathan’s personal copy of Gone with the Wind in hand I settled into one of the many lounge chairs surrounding the pool and dived into the book. It provided a nice distraction temporarily.

Somewhere between the fifth and sixth chapters I had managed to fall asleep. Though when I awoke I was surprise to find I was no longer sitting outside in the chair I had fallen asleep in. Instead I was in the living room on the half arm couch in front of the sun lit window with two small pillows under my head.

I sat up in my confusion and looked around the room for a sign on anyone in it. I frowned when came up empty.

As I stood I noticed I was no longer in my towel, but in a large bathrobe I’m pretty sure I’d seen hanging in my bathroom just this morning. Nathan. It had to be him that covered me. Set on finding him I exited the room in search.

“Ah. You’re up,” Amelia said when I nearly ran into her just outside the living room.

“Amelia, I’m sorry. I was just looking for Nathan,” I explained.

She nodded and smiled. “He’s just in the library. He’s been there since he brought you inside earlier.”

“Thank you.”

He was exactly where she said he would be, sitting at the desk with a book laid out in front of him. Though he seemed to be doing business rather than reading. I cleared my throat at my arrival. He looked up from his book and papers to offer me a light smile.

“I’m glad to see you’re not sunburned,” he said.

“Yeah, me too. Thanks for bringing me in. Sometimes I forget how fair skinned I am.”

“It’s good I have a great memory then.”

I smiled but didn’t reply. I stepped closer to him and looked down at his book.

“Busy?”

“Just finishing up actually.” He closed the book and pushed it to the side.

I grew nervous when he rose from the green leather chair and talked toward me. My heart picked up in pace. I could hear the thumping in my ears. He stopped only a couple of feet in front of me.

“I was hoping we could talk,” he said.

“Okay. About what?” I asked thought I was fairly certain I already knew.

“Us.”

Oh…I was right.

“W-what about us?”

Was I really ready for this conversation? Wasn’t it a danger zone for us? I just wanted to avoid the subject of us, but he seemed determined to get some answers from me no matter what. He was unrelenting.

“What are we doing here?”

I scrunched my brows. “What do you mean?”

“Why are you staying here with me?” He rephrased.

“It’s it fairly obvious? It was a requirement in order to get me divorce.”

He didn’t seem at all satisfied by my answer and shook his head. “That’s a lie, Peyton. I’m not forcing you to stay here. I may have requested it, but I know you. You don’t let anyone tell you what to do. When you want something you get it. If you didn’t want to be here you wouldn’t be.”

I sighed. “What are you getting at, Nathan?”

He took another step closer to me leaving little to no room between us now. Out chest were nearly touching.

“I’m saying that deep down you really want to stay here. You don’t want to go.”

I raised my brow and crossed my arms. “That’s quite a bold statement, don’t you think?”

“It’s true,” he argued. “If you would have gone back to Manhattan and refused my terms you know I’d still have given you what you wanted. All I ever wanted was to get you here….to see you again. I couldn’t ask for more than your arrival.”

“You have followed me back,” I stated.

“Only because I know you would have wanted it.” He placed his hands on either side of my face and smiled.  “Admit it, Peyton. You feel something for me and you know it. It was obvious the last time I saw you.”

Oh no. He’s figured it out. He knows too much.

“Nathan, please. Don’t go there,” I begged.

He smirked. “Why? Because you know I’m right? I don’t think you would have married if you didn’t feel something for me.”

I pulled away from his and broke free of his hold.

“But I left you the next morning. It was a mistake. It never should have happened.”

A pained emotion passed over his feature causing me to flitch and I instantly wished I could take back my words. Before I could even apologize he spoke back up.

“I don’t think even you believe that. It’s just words. You don’t men them,” he said. “You may not have remembered much about our night together, but I do. And I meant those vows I took. I knew what we were doing and I chose to go through with it. And I thought you wanted that too.”

“Wait, you knew?” I asked taken aback. “Why would marry me if you had a choice?”

It was unfathomable. I left because I thought that’s what he wanted. Not that he intentionally married me.

He closed the distance between us again. “Because I love you. I’ve always loved you. You’ve just been too blind to see it.” He wrapped his arms around my body and brought his forehead to mine. His hot breath fanned over me.

My breathing picked up rapidly. My heart was a loud thump in my chest. He probably heard it too. How embarrassing.

“I don’t know what to do with that,” I admitted. “I had no idea. I’m sorry.”

Even when his mom told me I had trouble believing it. In what world would Nathan actually be interested in me?

“Well the important thing is you know now. So it’s up to you where we go from here. What do you want, Peyton? The choice lies with you.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Comment…Vote…and Follow.

Only a few more chapters left!

Chapter is unedited.