Later that night, I was in my bed thinking. This place was much friendlier than I had expected. Back at FwF, teachers didn't give a damn if you got hurt. They'd snap at you if you mistimed an attack. They say that 'If you need defence, you're weak.' They teach us to be emotionless, to shut away our emotions.

Here, it's different. The teachers encourage you to slow down if you're hurt, and help you when you do something wrong. They teach defence first, and they don't kill. FwF doesn't give a damn if they kill someone or not. Everyone here seems to show their emotions, and no one uses that.

It's confusing as well, because here clearly accepts magic, whether at FwF it's forbidden. And the way they treat prisoners is different too. At FwF, if you were, you were a prisoner. Less lunch for you, mediocre classes, and terrible living conditions. The Guards were randomly selected, and they had the worst job.

Here, you weren't a prisoner, you were a Jailed. They got the same amount of food as everyone else, and the same quality classes and rooms. The only difference between a Jailed and a regular student is that they have set times a day for their classes and they all go at the same time. The Jailers are said to have the worst job, but only because you have to be strict with the Jailed.

Everyone was much friendlier too. They shared more about their lives as well. I saw someone tell someone else that they didn't like thunderstorms. I could tell the other person didn't even think about using that to their advantage. It was so confusing.

I wanted to commit myself to this, but I didn't want to be made an example. I still cared whether I was a traitor or not. I needed to be seen in a good light. I sighed. I got out of bed and went over to where Nico said I could practice magic safely. I stepped through.

I practised making some pictures with my Light magic, making mostly cats and hearts. They solidified, and I grabbed them and put them by the door. I decided to try something a bit more delicate. I imagine my light, twisting into a koru heart. I feel it, as I shape it. I open my eyes. I gasp, because I can tell how strong it is.

I do it for the other powers as well. Soon, I have five koru hearts, standing for each of my powers. They look similar, but act differently. The Light curves and stretches gracefully, while the Water splashes. The Earth is overgrown, while Air is almost invisible. Fire, the last one, flickers, like any other fire.

I carefully grab them and put them in a cupboard, then grab my Light paintings. I take them back into my room and put them in my small display cupboard. I go back to bed.

I toss and turn. There's no denying how magic makes me feel, or how at home I feel, compared to FwF. But to even start to change alliances, I need to tell someone that I was sent as a spy. They might kick me out without realising I want to change sides.

I pause. Would they? Ssundee seems nice enough. Maybe I could ask him to keep it to himself? But what if he tells me I have to break contact with them? I don't want to be labelled a traitor. This is useless.

Five decision changes later, I decide to fuck it and just tell him. To hell with the consequences. I finally get some sleep.