#ABNQ65 Chapter 65

"Do you want anything, Ma'am?" the flight attendant asked me.

"Champagne for me," sabi nung katabi ko bago ibalik ang atensyon sa akin. "So... ituloy mo na 'yung kwento mo! Nag-usap ba kayo ni Psalm? Nagalit ba siya nung hindi ka pumayag na magrunaway kayo?"

As she continued to talk, memories began to fill my head once again.

"I can't..." I said as I stared in his eyes. Pain quickly filled his eyes. It was as if he tasted betrayal once again after years of living in it. Mabilis kong hinawakan ang kanyang kamay. "Psalm... Psalm, I need to do this."

Tumingin siya sa akin. "Why can't we do it together?" he asked. "Five years, Joey. We already wasted five years. I can't waste any more time. I refuse to."

Tumango ako habang pinupunasan ang mga luha ko. "I know... But I need this. I need to do this to breathe again. I can't live feeling like this..." I said as I reached for his hand. "I made this mistake, and everyday, it continues to haunt me. I need to do this to live with myself. Please understand."

Hindi agad siya naka-sagot. Nanatili lamang siyang naka-tingin sa akin. Nanatili akong naka-tingin sa kanya. I needed him to understand that it's not that I didn't want him with me because I do... I'd always want him by my side... but this was something that I needed to do alone.

I needed to make amends with myself.

I needed to be able to look at myself without feeling all the shame and disappointment.

"I can't waste time anymore," he said.

"But I can't live like this," I replied.

Tumingin siya sa akin. "Why do we always end up like this?" he asked. "Why do I feel like whatever happens, in the end, you'll still end up running from me?"

A forced smile was all I got. I understood where he came from, but I knew myself that I needed time to heal. Dahil alam ko na kung pumayag man akong tumakbo kasama siya, dadating iyong panahon na mapapagod ako. Na patuloy akong kakainin ng mga ginawa ko dati. Na sa huli, pareho lang kaming masasaktan.

"Someday, I'll stop running from you and start running to you."

"Do you think I'll still be here when the time comes?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. But all I know is that we're bound to get burned if we run right now."

My mind was snapped back to reality when I felt someone poking my arm. "Descending na tayo."

I looked outside. Tipid akong napa-ngiti nang makita ko ang pamilyar na airport. The sky was orange and I couldn't help but smile at the sight. Ilang buwan din nang huli akong naka-punta dito. Ilang buwan din bago ako nagkaroon ng lakas ng loob na bumalik.

"Ready ka na?" she asked.

I nodded. "Never been more ready," I said as I prepared to get out of the plane.

Nagpaalam na ako sa katabi ko nang makuha ko iyong mga gamit ko. If not for her, I didn't know what I would've done during the flight. Sobrang kinakabahan ako dahil pagkatapos ng ilang buwan, ngayon ko lang ulit makikita ang mga kaibigan ko... si Psalm. I was so excited, but at the same time scared. I knew Psalm and I didn't really leave things on a good note. I knew that as much as he tried to understand why I needed to leave, he didn't like the idea. Tama naman kasi siya. We already wasted so much time being apart... but this time apart was the one I needed to heal.

Dumiretso ako sa parking lot. I contacted Anj para sabihin na babalik na ako. I told her not to tell anyone dahil gusto ko na si Psalm ang una kong pupuntahan pagbalik ko. I did promise him that once I return, if he's still interested in keeping me, I was willing to be kept...

"Baliw talaga," I uttered when I really found the key sa taas nung gulong. Ano kayang gagawin niya kung nanakaw 'tong sasakyan ko?

Mabilis kong inilagay ang mga gamit ko sa likod. Konti lang ang dala ko nung pumunta ako sa Bukidnoon. Good for one week lang tapos nilalabhan ko. It was a routine, but a relaxing one. Sobrang gumaan ang loob ko sa ilang buwan na pamamalagi ko doon. Iba talaga ang pakiramdam na iyong mga pinag-aaralan mo lang dati, nagagamit mo na para maka-tulong sa mga tao. It filled my soul. I felt so much better now.

"Hi! You're here na?" Anj called as I was stuck in the usual traffic in the Metro.

"Yeah, just landed a few minutes ago," sagot ko. "Wala kang sinabihan, 'di ba?"

"Duh." I could imagine her rolling her eyes. "San ka uuwi?"

"Bahay. May iba pa ba akong uuwian?" nagtataka na tanong ko.

"Oh, okay. See you. Bye," sabi niya tapos mabilis na pinutol iyong tawag. Napailing na lang ako sa kanya at saka nagpatuloy sa pagda-drive. I opened the radio, and a song welcomed my ears.

'You are my favorite everything.
Shut up, I love you; you're my best friend...'

I bit my lower lip. Hindi ko napigilan ang sarili ko na mapa-ngiti. "No more waiting," I said as I decided to drive to Psalm's office instead.

I was running. I couldn't run any faster. Gustung-gusto ko na siyang makita at mahawakan. These past few months have been torture for me. I was happy to be helping people, but I missed him so bad, too. I missed him more knowing that he didn't hate the thought of me. I missed him more knowing that he loves me too...

"Hi," bati ko sa receptionist. "Is Psalm here?"

Agad na kumunot ang noo niya. "Mr. Gomez de Liaño?" she asked. I nodded fervently. My fingers were shaking a little. I wanted to see him so bad! "He resigned months ago."

"What?" gulat na tanong ko.

She nodded again. "If there are other things I can be of help," sabi niya.

Nagtataka akong lumabas ng embassy. I... I didn't know he resigned. He never told me anything... but it wasn't as if we talked during those six months apart. We just both agreed to give each other space. Alam ko na pareho naming kailangan iyon. I knew that as much as he forgave me, he still needed time to process everything. I didn't want us to be together if there were still forlorn feelings kept. I didn't want us to sweep feelings under the rag, and wait for them to be in pile before we confront them all. It was just chaos in waiting, and I was tired of chaos.

So, I drove to the house with a heavy heart. I tried to keep my mind off of it until I returned. Hindi ko pa nakaka-usap si Psalm, and the last thing that I needed was to get into an accident.

"Anj..." I whispered as I saw cars parked a few meters from the house. Of course I knew those cars kahit sa malayo pa nila i-park! Pasaway talaga!

Nagpark ako ng medyo malayo, at naglakad na lang papasok. I planned on surprising them, pero ako ang na-surprise nang makita ko si Psalm sa harap ko. I halted. My eyes were solely on him. I couldn't move. My heart started fluttering at the mere sight of him.

"Y-you're here," I croaked.

He was looking at me. I waited. I waited for any reaction from him. I waited to know if he was as glad to see me as I was to see him. I knew we didn't promise anything... but God, I'd be lying if I'd say that I didn't pray that he'd be waiting for me.

"Why won't I be here?" he replied.

I pressed my lips, and begged myself to calm down. "I went to the embassy."

Bahagyang umawang ang labi niya. "You did?"

I nodded. "You resigned," I stated. "Why?"

His eyes were on me. And I love it whenever his eyes were on me. His stares made me feel special. Like I was the only person who matters. Like I was the only one.

"I made a pact with myself to only do things that make me happy," he said. I bit my lower lip. "I resigned right after you left. I have a new job."

"Are you playing again?" I asked. I wanted to hear that he's playing again. Anj said that after we broke up, hindi niya na nakita si Psalm na naglalaro. And it broke me even more. It broke me to know that I caused him to give up the thing that he loved doing the most. It hurt me so bad.

"Yeah, kinda," he said. Kumunot ang noo ko. "I work for an NGO right now, and when I'm not working, I teach the kids to play ball."

A smile formed on my lips. I was happy for him. So happy. All I wanted was for him to do something that he loves, and I was happy to know that he finally gave in and do it. Life is short to do anything but things that you love. Iyon ang palagi niyang sinasabi sa akin dati kaya naman nalungkot ako nang sinabi niya na magta-trabaho siya sa opisina kahit alam ko na hindi niya iyong gusto.

But that was all in the past right now. I was just glad that we both finally came into terms with the things that we love.

"Are you back?" tanong niya. I nodded. "For good?"

"Yes," I replied.

Ilang segundo pang naka-titig lamang kami sa isa't-isa. Parehong naghihintay, parehong nag-aabang. We both knew the words, but we both didn't know how to say them...

But fuck waiting.

I was done waiting.

"Do you still want to runaway?" I asked him, looking him in the eye because I wanted him to know that this time, I was in. This time, no more hesitation. This time, I'd do whatever it takes to be with him.

He took a step forward. I held my breath.

"With you? Always," he said as he reached for my hand.

* * *

Para akong lumulutang sa ere nang pumasok kami ni Psalm sa loob ng bahay. Ilang minuto pa kaming nanatili sa labas, naka-tingin lang sa isa't-isa habang hinihintay na humupa ang nararamdaman.

Every one of our friends was inside, waiting for us. Ang tagal na ng panahon na lumipas, pero halos walang nagbago sa pagkakaibigan namin. Sure, we all matured in our own ways, but still, deep down, we're the same people who met in college and hit it off.

They're my people.

They're the ones who I know will always have my back... kasi ganoon din ako sa kanila. That no matter how many times they mess up, I'll always be here, ready to pick up the pieces. Because we all saw one another at our lowest, and we love each other nonetheless.

"Are we really doing this?" I asked as we stared at each other's face.

He nodded. "I don't really care where I am as long as you're with me."

I reached for his face, and caressed his cheek. "What about your work?" I asked. I just didn't want him to give up anything for me. If anything, I wanted to be the one who's ready to give up anything for him. He loved me too much already, that I felt that it was my turn to give him everything.

"There are plenty of people to help everywhere," he said. "What about your work? Don't you want to work at a hospital or to do residency?"

I shrugged. We both were comfortably sharing a single seat. Hindi kami ganito dati. Yes, we were together, but we never acted like this. Ngayon, ewan ko... siguro kasi ang tagal naming hindi nagkasama kaya ngayon, lahat ng chance para magkadikit kami ay kinukuha namin. Kulang na nga lang kumandong ako sa kanya.

I could even feel his breath fanning my ear.

"I still can't decide sa residency," sagot ko. "But I really liked what I did back in Bukidnon. Iba sa feeling iyong nakaka-tulong ka... Lalo na sa mga malalayong lugar?" I answered, suddenly feeling a surge of sadness nang maalala ko na naman iyong mga batang naiwan ko sa Bukidnon. I promised them that I'd come back sa Pasko para magdala ng mga regalo.

Psalm's arms tightened around my waist. I felt his head leaning on my shoulder.

"I think I know what we should do," bulong niya sa akin bago kami nagsimulang hatakin paalis sa upuan ni Anj.

"Don't hoard Joey naman!" sabi ni Anj. Natawa ako. "Kulang na lang itali mo sa gilid mo, e."

"Hey, I missed her for almost six years! It's still my turn!" sabi ni Psalm habang hinahatak ako pabalik sa kanya. Muntik na akong mapilay dahil sa paghahatakan nila. The night was filled with laughter. Halos hindi ako maka-hinga dahil sa pagtawa sa mga kwento nila lalo na kay Matt. He's still on search for the one. I couldn't believe that he's the only single person in the group! Akala ko talaga makaka-buntis siya nang maaga!

The next few days, I just chose to rest and spend time with my family. Granted that they're all stressed out with everything that's happening, I appreciated that they allotted a day for me. Hindi lang ako maka-sagot tuwing tinatanong nila ako kung ano na ang plano ko. Psalm still hadn't told me about our plans. Kaya naman puro ngiti lang ang sinasagot ko kapag tinatanong ako.

"Hindi mo pa ba sasabihin?" tanong ko kay Psalm. It had been a week, but he was still mum about the plan.

Umiling siya. We were driving to Tagaytay to eat Bulalo, just like the old times. Pareho kasi kaming walang trabaho ngayon kaya ang dami naming oras. Kung anu-ano lang ang ginagawa namin. Buong araw kaming magkasama, nag-uusap lang tungkol sa kung anu-anong bagay. You'd think that we'd run out of things to talk about, but we never did. And that's what I like the most about being with him. I could just be myself, and he loves me for it.

"Kinukulit na ako nila Mama," sabi ko sa kanya. "Nagtatampo na talaga si Papa."

He looked at me for a split second bago niya ibinalik iyong atensyon niya sa daan. "I'm still fixing some things," he simply answered.

"Can't you tell me?"

Umiling siya. "I'll tell you when it's done."

Umirap ako. "Tss."

He laughed. "I promise, you'll love this," pangako niya sa akin. Pagdating namin sa Tagaytay, kumain lang kami tapos nagpunta sa kung saan-saan. We mainly stayed at this coffee shop that we used to frequent when we were in college. It's in a nice spot that we both could relax. Dito kami pumupunta kapag gusto naming tumakas sa mga nangyayari sa school dati.

"I wanna ask you something," I said.

"What?"

"About Kia..." sabi ko. When I was in Bukidnon, I kept on thinking about her. I felt bad because she didn't deserve what she got. College pa lang kami, alam ko na na may gusto siya kay Psalm... And I knew that when Psalm was at his lowest, she was there for him... She didn't deserve what Psalm did.

Agad na nag-iwas ng tingin si Psalm. I knew he felt guilty, too. It wasn't in his nature to just hurt anybody. It just wasn't him.

"How is she?"

"I don't know," he answered.

"Hindi mo alam?"

He nodded, and reached for his cup of coco. "I haven't talked to her since we broke up," simpleng sagot niya.

"Do you have common friends? I just want to know how she is," sabi ko. Tumingin siya sa akin. I reached for his hand, and held it. "I just feel bad for her. She just loves you."

He sighed. "She'll just get hurt if we continued that. She knew that it has always been you."

I sighed. "I know... I wish she's okay now."

"She is. She knows that it's just right that we end it."

"Is she mad?" I asked.

"Of course. But Kia's a strong person. She'll realize that I'm not the best person for her."

It's just hard to be completely happy knowing that someone's hurting... But I didn't want to dwell on that thought. I couldn't always choose someone's happiness over my own. I couldn't let myself wallow in sadness and pity just so someone could be happy. I did that before, but it made me so miserable. I couldn't do that again.

For once, I just wanted to choose myself.

* * *

Another week passed. I was getting impatient with his surprise, but he kept on telling me that I'd love the surprise kaya naman mas hinabaan ko ang pasensya.

"Ano? Hindi mo pa rin sasabihin?" bungad ko nang tawagan niya ako. I was so bored that I even cleaned the house! Nabisita ko na kasi lahat ng kaibigan ko. Wala na akong makasama kasi lahat sila busy sa trabaho. Ganito na talaga kapag matanda. Gumagawa ng mga plano na hindi matuluy-tuloy dahil busy lahat sa trabaho.

He laughed. "Ever impatient," sabi niya. "I'll pick you up in twenty minutes."

"What? Ngayon na?"

"Yeah. See you in twenty," sabi niya tapos binabaan agad ako ng tawag! That guy! Nagmadali akong magshower. I chose a decent dress dahil hindi ko naman alam kung saan kami pupunta. He brings me in so many different places! Minsan sa high end resto, minsan sa amusement park, and there was this one time na dinala niya ako sa laser tag! And I was wearing heels! I just didn't know how to dress appropriately dahil sa sobrang magkakaibang lugar niya ako dinadala!

I settled with a little black dress (because you could never go wrong with one) and just let my hair flow. Light makeup lang din ang ginawa ko. Seriously, Psalm needed to start telling me about his plans—hindi iyong nabibigla na lang ako kung saan kami pupunta!

'Here,' his text read. Nagmamadali akong bumaba palabas ng bahay.

"Am I dressed properly? Because I swear kung sa paintball—"

But I didn't finish what I was saying because he cupped my face and kissed me. Nanlaki ang mga mata ko sa gulat sa mga pangyayari, but it only took me half a second to close my eyes and kiss him back.

We were both panting when we let go.

"Hi," I said, gasping for air.

"Hi," he replied, smiling at me.

I reached for the side of his lips para burahin iyong bakas ng lipstick ko. "Smudge-proof daw..." bulong ko habang binubura iyong bakas. "San tayo pupunta?"

"Secret."

I groaned. "Secret na naman?!"

He laughed. "This is the last secret, I promise," sabi niya bago nagsimulang magdrive. Sumandal na lang ako habang nakikinig sa tugtog. I gave up guessing dahil never kong nahulaan kung saan niya ako dadalhin. But I was glad that I chose a good outfit nang huminto kami sa resto.

"You know, you can say that we're just having dinner, hindi iyong pinapa-kaba mo ako sa kaiisip kung saang barilan mo na naman ako dadalhin," sabi ko sa kanya habang naglalakad kami papasok.

Psalm's hand was on the small of my back. I wore heels because I could. My boyfriend's hella tall, so I liked wearing heels para naman tumagkad ako ng konti.

"You had fun, Joey," he said. "You had fun killing those little kids."

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko. "I did not!"

He laughed. "Sure, babe. You didn't have fun when you massacred those little kids who just wanted to have fun at laser tag."

Inaaway ko pa si Psalm nang mapa-tigil ako dahil nakita ko iyong mga magulang namin sa iisang lamesa. Agad na nahigit ko ang hininga ko.

"P-Psalm—"

"Let's go," he said instead, and led me towards the table. If not for Psalm leading me, baka hindi ako naka-galaw sa kinatatayuan ko. I just... oh, my God!

"G-good evening, Tito, Tita," I said as I kissed their cheeks. My hands felt really cold! I didn't want to think about what would unfold tonight, but my mind wouldn't let me rest!

Nang makaupo ako, parang gusto ko na lang abutin iyong wine at inumin iyong lahat. Halos mabingi ako sa kabog ng dibdib ko habang hinihintay ko ang susunod na mangyayari.

"Let's have dinner first," Psalm said.

Ngumiti si Papa. "Pwede muna bang malaman kung bakit kami nandito?" he asked, thankfully!

Tito Bert nodded. "I agree. Why are we here?"

Lahat kami ay naka-tingin kay Psalm. Ang lakas ng kabog ng dibdib ko. Hindi na ako nakapagpigil kaya inabot ko na iyong baso na may red wine, at diretsong ininom iyon.

Psalm let out a deep breath. Oh, boy. This seemed really serious. Would he— no. I didn't even want to consider it. I didn't want to expect.

"Ma, Pa," he said, looking at his parents. "Tito, Tita," he continued, looking at mine. "As you all know, Joey and I enjoyed doing volunteer work."

Mabilis na kumunot ang noo ko. Where was he going with this?

"If you'll all agree, we'd like to join the UN Program. It's for two years, and we'll go to different countries to help—"

"Two years?!" tumaas ang boses ni Papa. Napa-tingin ang ilang tao sa amin sa restaurant.

Psalm nodded. "Yes, Tito."

"Let me get this straight, Psalm Christian," sabi ni Papa. Inabot ko na iyong wine na para kay Mama at ininom iyon. Mama looked at me with questioning eyes, but that was the least of my concerns today! I didn't know what the fuck was happening!

"You're saying that you want to take my only daughter around the world for two years?" Papa asked using his menacing voice na ngayon ko lang narinig! I knew he didn't like it. Six years na akong nawala dahil sa medschool, six months sa Bukidnon, tapos ngayon two years ulit?

"Yes, Tito, but—"

"No," mabilis na sagot ni Papa. "Hindi ako papayag na umalis kayong dalawa ng bansa na kayong dalawa lang at ni hindi nga kayo kasal! Ano bang balak mo sa buhay mo, ha, Jocelyn?" tanong niya naman sa akin. Nanlaki ang mga mata ko dahil wala rin akong alam sa plano nitong si Psalm! Sure, I love the idea of joining a UN program, but he never consulted me with this! Hindi ako nakapaghanda sa sasabihin ko sa mga magulang ko!

"I'm sorry, Psalm, I don't like this," Tita Anna said, as well. "They're right. I like Joey, but you two are not married. I don't approve of the idea of you two traipsing around the world, unmarried."

I reached for Papa's glass of wine. I was hearing the word married a lot. I needed more of this red juice.

"We won't do anything," Psalm said.

"It's still a no," sagot ni Papa tapos tumingin sa akin na umiinom na naman ng wine. "Ano ba'ng bata ka," sabi niya tapos inagaw sa akin iyong wine glass. "Kung gusto niyo talagang maglibot sa kung saan man ng magkasama, magpakasal muna kayong dalawa."

Psalm's parents nodded. "They're right, Psalm. Until then, we don't see this UN program happening."

* * *

I woke up with the feeling of something drilling my skull. But even with my head aching, I still reached for my phone. Akala ko may text mula kay Psalm, pero wala akong nakuha. But there was a text from Anj asking me to go on a brunch with her.

"You look hangover."

Tumango ako at saka inabot iyong baso ng tubig. "Because I am."

"So... kailan kayo aalis?"

"Aalis?"

She nodded. "Sabi ni Psalm magvovolunteer daw kayo sa UN. I need to know the details para makapagplano ng despedida party! Hilig niyo pa namang dalawa na biglang nawawala tapos nagpapakita after years!"

I shrugged. "Hindi tuloy," sabi ko. "Ayaw ng parents namin."

"Seriously?" she asked, and I nodded and explained what transpired last night. My memory was only sharp during the beginning of the night, and as the night grew, my memories got vaguer. Hindi ko na natagalan iyong usapan nila kaya naging busy ako sa red wine.

"So... basically, they told you two to get married?"

I groaned and reached for her glass of water. "Stop saying that word."

"Bakit? Ayaw mo ba magpakasal?"

My throat felt dry. My head was aching. My vision was still spinning... but even with all these, I could still remember how heated last night's conversation was about this getting married. I could still hear how my parents gave us the option of not going or go but get married.

But Psalm didn't make a choice.

And that was the choice.

"I don't know," I said, afraid of voicing out my thoughts. Why wouldn't just Psalm say that he'd marry me? Didn't he say before that he was about to propose before we broke up? What happened? What changed?

It was all inside my head, and I felt like exploding.

Anj must have felt my frustration. She reached for my hand, and squeezed it. "He loves you, you know?"

I smiled. "I know," I replied... but why wouldn't he propose?

* * *

In the end, we both didn't go to the UN program. Psalm continued with his work and I began my residency for Obstetrics and Gynecology. Papa was finally happy that I was staying in one place after years of being away from him.

I was happy.

I was.

I was finally decided on what to pursue, I was with my family, I was with my friends, I was with Psalm. After years of uncertainty, finally, things were in their right places.

"Hey," Psalm said after I answered his call. "Are you done?"

I nodded. "Yeah... sunduin mo ba ako? I can't drive. I'm so tired..."

"Okay," he replied. "I cooked. Can you swing by or do you want me to drive you home?" tanong niya.

Psalm got a condo because he said he wanted to move out of their house. I think it was Saint's condo na hindi naman na nagagamit dahil may bahay na si Saint kasama iyong asawa niya na once ko pa lang yata nakita. She seems really nice. We just hadn't had the chance to bond dahil busy ako palagi at busy din siya palagi sa mga anak nila.

A few minutes later, Psalm texted na nasa labas na raw siya. Lumabas na ako. I kept on yawning because I just pulled a 72 hours shift, and I was tired as hell. I was doing my residency at a public hospital because I liked the diversity of patients here. Sabi ni Papa, mas marami daw akong matututunan dito. The salary was very bad and some people were really rude, but I liked gaining experience.

"Thanks, babe," I said when he handed me a bottled water. He knew that once I was in my residency, hindi na ako nakakainom masyado ng tubig dahil masyado talagang busy. Minsan nga sa gurney na ako nakaka-tulog sa sobrang pagod.

"You sure you still want to go? Or I can drive you home? You look really tired," he said, caressing my cheek with his thumb.

Umiling ako habang naka-ngiti. "Ayos lang ako. I'll just take a quick nap. Gisingin mo na lang ako pag nandun na tayo," sabi ko bago ako pumikit.

When I opened my eyes, napansin ko na nasa loob na ako ng condo ni Psalm. I could smell food. My stomach instantly grumbled. Nagtatampo na talaga iyong tyan ko sa akin dahil puro galing dietary ang kinakain ko lately.

"Hi," sabi ko habang naka-yakap sa likod ni Psalm. Naabutan ko siya na naka-tayo sa harap ng ref. "Di mo ko ginising."

"You looked really tired," sagot niya tapos niluwagan iyong yakap ko sa kanya. He turned around and looked at me. "You wanna eat?"

I nodded. "What did you cook?"

"Steak and mashed potato... and of course, rice," sabi niya. Inirapan ko siya. I needed rice! Sa dami ng ginagawa ko sa ospital, magcocollapse na talaga ako kapag hindi ako kumain nang maayos.

Pumunta na kami sa dining area. We ate while we talked about Psalm's work. I couldn't talk about my patients even if I wanted to. Pinag-usapan din namin kung saan kami magbabakasyon sa susunod dahil kailangan pa naming maghanap ng common time pareho. We're really both adults.

"Sinabi mo na kay Matt?" I asked and he nodded.

"What about Anj?" he asked and I nodded.

"Good. Finally," he said, and I laughed.

Our parents never really approved of us going on vacation together! For the past two years, every time we'd like to go somewhere that would require air travel, kailangan may chaperone kaming dalawa. As if we weren't both 28 years old! Parang bata pa rin kung ituring! After two vacations with our friends na kailangan pa naming suhulan para sumama, we finally decided to just... lie. We'd tell our parents na may kasama kaming dalawa. All Anj and Matt needed to do was to avoid being seen by our parents in public. That way, pwede na kaming dalawa lang ni Psalm ang nasa bakasyon.

After our dinner, we settled in front of the TV. We got a bowl of popcorn and blanket covering our laps. Naka-sandal ako kay Psalm habang naka-yakap siya sa akin.

"What about Maldives?" I asked.

"Let's just sched that for summer," he said, planting little kisses on the top of my head. "Kyoto?"

I looked up, and eagerly nodded. "Yes! Pwede doon na lang?" I asked and he laughed. "Promise 'yan, ha? Magfa-file na ako ng leave! Magmamakaawa na ako sa attendant ko!"

Tinawanan lang ako ni Psalm. God, I wanted to go back to Japan again! Last time kasi na pumunta kami, kasama namin si Steele at Andrea. Kinailangan agad naming bumalik kasi nagka-problem sa business nila Steele. 'Di naman pwede na maiwan kami kasi malalaman nila Mama kasi package deal kaming apat.

"I'll book the flight," he said.

I grinned. "Thank you," I said, planting a kiss on his lips. "I love you."

"I love you, too," he said, and then held my head and kissed me properly. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and angled my head so he could kiss me deeper.

"Joey..." he groaned.

"Please?" I begged. Palagi na lang ganito. Kapag gusto ko, tumitigil na siya. "Please?" I repeated as I pulled his head down and kissed him again. I pulled his lower lip using my teeth, and looked him in the eye. "Please? Babe, please?"

Umiling si Psalm, tapos tumayo.

"I'm starting to think that steak has some effect on you," sabi niya bago ako iniwan sa couch. I glared at his retreating back. I was starting to get pissed at him. He wouldn't propose, he wouldn't go farther than kissing... Fine, he didn't want to marry me, but I didn't plan on being a 30 year-old virgin!

Just wait for Kyoto, Psalm. There's nowhere for you to run.