A/N:  Big author's note announcement following chapter.  Please be sure to read as it's very important.

3425 words

3448 words Updated 7/2/24

3516 words Updated 1/18/24

Once I got in the SUV after the impromptu meeting that I had with Junghee I felt everything start catching up with me all at once. I hadn't even realized how I had automatically detached myself from the threatening situation. I wasn't even sure how I was able to compartmentalize my own emotions and put them in the back of my mind like that. The minute my car door shut behind me though I immediately felt it all.

Someone was watching me, which meant I had to start becoming more aware of my surroundings. The fact that I had someone out there potentially spying on my every move was terrifying, and I hoped I didn't outwardly show the growing intense apprehension I was starting to feel. My emotions start sinking as the dread starts to take over. A big ball of lead grows in my stomach before a majority of the muscles in my back and neck grow tense. I just want to get back to my motel room and take a bath. That was probably the only thing that would let me calm down right now, but I should probably take a shower instead. I wouldn't have time in 'the morning' to do so after all. I scoff and internally roll my eyes at the thought of repeating today's schedule for two more days. Of having to wake up at an ungodly hour in order to leave at three am. I couldn't help but fear what Comeback week might look like. Please don't let it have a similar call time. I pause. Who am I kidding? It is more than likely to have a very similar call time.

Mengrai starts the SUV and turns in my direction before kindly reminding me in his stunted English, "You should eat."

That pile of lead that built in my stomach rolled over and did a belly flop at the thought of food, leaving me feeling nauseous. "I'm not hungry." I find myself replying. I probably should have shown him the pictures too, so he would also know what was going on. So he would also have my back just in case any issues were to arise, but I wanted to talk to Junghee first to get his input. I should have asked about including Mengrai before now, but it simply didn't occur to me.

Mengrai gives me a knowing look, and with the next few sentences he utters I know I needn't have worried because he has already been enlightened about the existence of my stalker; Junghee probably scanned pictures of the photos, and sent digital copies to Mengrai, so he knew exactly what to be concerned about. "It's scary. I know. But– you must eat." I can tell by his incomplete sentences that he was having difficulty coming up with exactly what he wanted to say. I am sure he meant something along the lines of, 'you need to take care of yourself.'

It's not like I don't agree with him. I had been the only one to take care of myself for years now after all. I had always been able to push myself to eat something whenever I was sick, or my stress level and emotions were high, similarly to how I am feeling right now. But, I'm not alone now. I have people like Mengrai, and my Soulmates who will always look after my well being.

Hell, Juah would probably go complete mother hen if he knew I skipped a meal. He'd make something easy on the stomach, and force the dish into my hands. Or, I can even picture him force feeding me should I refuse.

"How about something light or easy on the stomach?" I suggest.

He grins in triumph and nods his head, before replying in his somewhat broken English. "I know of place."

About fifteen minutes later he pulls up to a small restaurant. I can only guess, judging by the pictures, that they must specialize in rice porridge. "Be right back." He says before leaving me in the SUV, and locking the doors behind me.

For that brief moment, my newfound paranoia spikes, and I already feel the phantom eyes of someone there watching me beyond the tinted glass. That thought has chills running down my spine, and I can't help but physically jump in my seat when Mengrai comes back and hands me a menu. I'm about to hand it back and explain that I can't read it when I happen to glance down at it and notice it's in both Hangul and English. There is a huge selection, and I find myself scared of half the items on the menu and intrigued by the other half. I point at the first picture on the list, and show Mengrai. It's probably the simplest, least unique dish on the list, but that's exactly why I picked the chicken and vegetable porridge. "This one please."

I expect him to go back in, but instead he pulls out his phone. It takes me a moment to realize that he is placing the order remotely. "Not long." He reassures me with a smile.

I'm startled again about ten minutes later when his phone chimes, and directly afterward there is a knock on his driver side window shortly after. They brought it out to him? Did he ask beforehand, leave special instructions when he ordered, or does he perhaps frequent this restaurant when he is driving around my soulmates?

I'm not about to eat the thick soup dish in the SUV, so I ask him to take me back to the hotel. The warm dish sits on my lap, and somehow the heat I feel through the plastic bag comforts me into a state of passive indifference; not quite apathetic, but a sort of dazed numbness.

I expect him to drop me off at the front of the hotel, but instead he parks the SUV and walks in with me. I'm thankful to have him by my side right now, and I'm unsurprised when he goes in with me. I don't know how long he is planning on staying. Once we are standing in the elevator together, I notice an identical plastic bag in his own hand that I hadn't been aware of before. From that fact alone, I can at least work out that he plans on eating with me, which is probably in part to make sure I eat. I debate briefly whether we should sit on the floor and use the coffee table to eat at, or if we should eat at the desk instead. It's solely because I only have the one desk chair that I head toward the coffee table in the living room area. I elect to sit in the space between the coffee table and the couch; I figure, since he's a big man, both in height and muscle mass, that he needs more room.

I lift the lid from my dish, to help emphasize that I am truly attempting to at least make an effort to eat. I find myself immediately content at the mild fragrance that hits my senses. That lasts for only a moment until he lifts his own lid and bold spices fill the room. They aren't unpleasant by any means, but there is definitely a sharp contrast between the two. He must have gotten one of the more daring dishes on the menu. I lean forward and see a bright, vibrant reddish orange porridge. I can tell it's probably spicy, due to both the scent and color alone, but otherwise I'm stumped about what dish it might be. There were at least three reddish orange dishes on the menu, if not more. My curiosity gets the better of me as he pulls out his spoon. "What did you get?"

I frown after asking because I instantly start to worry that he might not be able to explain with his limited English, but he simply smiles at me before pulling out the same paper menu for the restaurant, which I hadn't realized he kept. He points at the picture and I read, 'Spicy Pollack Porridge', underneath the picture. I'm not surprised that, like Gamon, he too enjoys spicy dishes. "I might have to try it sometime."

He widens his eyes and dips his spoon into the porridge. Instead of putting it to his own lips he offers me the first bite.

I shake my head. "I'm not really craving spicy food right now." I try to explain to him.

When he puts the spoon down, smiles at me, and nods I know that he understood what I was trying to say. I take a hesitant bite of my porridge, simply because I'm worried that my unsettled stomach still might rebel against me. When the flavor hits my tongue I smile up at Mengrai and finish the spoonful. He smiles at me and nods once more before eating a bite of his own porridge.

We shared the rest of our meal in silence. I only managed to eat half of the bowl, but at least it was enough to satisfy him. "Call me if you need me." He punctuates how seriously I should take his suggestion by gripping my upper arm firmly, but gently, and nodding before he bids me goodnight.

Once he is gone I decide to take a short shower just to clean the remnants leftover from the long day from my body, but I cave afterward and end up also taking the relaxing bubble bath that I had been daydreaming about earlier. I have been in the tub for maybe five minutes when my phone rings. I smile at the display and answer immediately.

"Angel! You answered!" Jiseong announces with immediate glee, but I find myself taken aback by the way he greeted me.

"Of course I answered. Why wouldn't I?"

"You didn't answer earlier. Juah-hyung got worried."

Oops, I didn't even bother to pull out my phone and check it after the meeting. I brought it in the bathroom with me, but never thought to look at the display. "Oh, like I said I had something work related to do. My phone was on silent until I got home about an hour or so ago." Then the time hits me. "Shouldn't you be in bed? Are you the only one awake right now?"

"No. Once Juah started worrying, we all started worrying."

"Can you please tell them all that I'm at the hotel and fine? That there is no reason to worry."

"You can tell them. I'll go into the living room and put you on speaker."

It's only at that moment that I realize that I've been on the phone with my youngest soulmate while naked in the tub. I'm not about to shy away from reassuring them I am okay. Despite that, I am somewhat worried that one of them might pick up on the echo of the enclosed space, or that I could end up shifting just enough that they hear the water shift against my skin due to my movement. Before I can find a legitimate reason and a gentle way to insist that he report to them like I asked, outside of unveiling the truth, I hear their muted voices and can tell he's already in the living room with them.

"Lily? You're okay?" I frown as Juah's distressed voice comes through.

I can't help but hate that I frightened him, all of them really, but I feel even more awful about the fact that I have to keep something so disturbing from them. That I can't tell them that they might have justifiable reason to feel as unsettled as they do. I try not to let out the weighted sigh that's building up, begging to be released before replying as naturally as possible. "I promise I'm okay. Like I said I just had some more work related things to handle before coming back to the hotel. I didn't answer because my phone was still on silent at the time, and it was in my bag so I didn't feel it vibrate."

"Can we do a video call just to see for ourselves that you are alright?" Jaeyeon asks.

"NO!" Crap, I shouldn't have jumped and responded like that. They were sure to at least question why I reacted like that, and they probably heard the water rippling against my skin due to the way I bolted just now.

A seductive half chuckle comes through the phone. "What did we catch you doing, Lily?"

Fucking Minsook. Of course he had to be the one to comment. I'm sure he's not the only one that noticed though. My voice comes out almost robotic, stiff as I nervously answer him. "I'd like to refrain from answering at this juncture in time."

"Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. What kind of fun is there to be had in an answer like that?" He teases once more.

"Minsookie," Gamon growls out in warning.

"Hyung, you can't tell me you don't want to know yourself." I can perfectly picture the knowing smirk he has aimed at the leader.

"I can easily imagine what she might be doing." Jaeyeon practically purrs.

Well, crap. I knew I had to worry about how flirtatious Minsook could be, but who knew that Jaeyeon might be a problem as well. I'm not about to admit it, but my body had a visceral reaction to his crooning voice. Delicious chills ran up and down my spine, goosebumps erupted all over my body, and warmth pooled low into my center. Could I get off from his voice alone? I couldn't help but wonder.

Juah sighs in frustration, but I don't know if his frustration is a result of Minsook's teasing or if it's of the sexual variety. Before I can consider too heavily what he might be so flustered about, his tender voice flows from the speaker. "We know she is okay now. We should all be getting ready for bed."

Minsook curses. "Damn, you're right." My phone clicks, and I realize that he took the phone off speaker. I can barely make out rustling and muffled complaints before hearing a loud noise. Maybe a door shutting?

"Before I let the others say goodbye, I just wanted to let you know that I am most definitely going to be imagining your naked body in that tub." There is no way I can answer him. "Just answer me one question. Bubbles? Yes or No?"

I hesitate. Is it wrong that I want to answer him? I mean I know exactly what he would do with the visuals that answer would evoke. I'm not that naive. Heck, he would probably imagine me in the tub regardless at this point, and he would be sure to take care of his visceral reaction to the visuals in his head. "Hmm. If I said no, how would you respond?"

"I'd imagine the refraction in the water only mildly disturbing the view of your perfect body." He admits.

"And if I said yes?" My lip works its way in between my teeth.

"Fuck." He switches to Korean, and I'm assuming it's because it's too difficult to think in English for him right now. "That's almost worse. I'd have to know if the suds were fading, or if they were piled high in the waters. If they were piled high I would imagine myself kneeling beside you, trying to brush them aside. If they were practically faded, only covering the body parts I most want to see... Well, then I would be tempted to imagine myself touching those places and watching the rest of your body's heated reaction to my caresses." His candid answers have an unexpected moan leaving me, and he groans in response. He pauses for a moment and when he speaks in English once more I'm almost dissatisfied to note that he has regained some composure. "Sounds like you like the sound of that. Maybe we'll have to revisit talking like this again in the future. I can't wait to hear–"

Loud knocking interrupts whatever he was about to say. "Hyung! My phone!" I can barely decipher Jiseong's voice.

"Crap! You make me lose my senses, Lily." His wholehearted disappointment is reflected in the way he sighs. "I should probably let you say goodbye to the others."

"Sweet dreams, Minsook." My voice comes out raspy, and I hear him curse away from the phone.

"You're going to be trouble." He mutters.

A half laugh escapes me. "Nah, I think you will be the one to forever bear that crown."

"Sweet Dreams, Lily."

The door opens, and an immediate blush burns all over my body. I expect Jiseong's voice first, but it's Juah that comes over the phone. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." I don't really know why he is asking. If it is because of the fact that I didn't respond earlier tonight, or if it's because of my semi-sensual conversation I had with Minsook.

"He didn't– I mean–"

Ah, so he is worried what Minsook might have pressured me into. I smile at his loving nature. "I promise I'm completely okay." It's the only answer I have to give. "Now, please get some rest."

"Goodnight, Lily."

"Goodnight, Juah. Don't put in too much effort regarding breakfast in a few hours." I gently scold him. He chuckles gently in response, and I have to wonder if he might have already prepared breakfast ahead of time.

The phone is handed off to his twin. He doesn't give any preamble to wishing me a good night's sleep, but he uses that growling dangerous voice that I heard for the first time tonight. Damn. Between him and Minsook I don't know if I am going to be able to get any sleep tonight.

Gamon grumbles when he is handed the phone. "It's almost ridiculous that Juahie and Jiseongie are the only two members I don't want to scold right now."

"What? Why?"

"I don't need any help creating stimulating visuals of you, Teerak. Minsook I'm sure already verbally seduced you into revealing something you probably normally wouldn't. Jaeyeon apparently figured out how that particular voice he is using is making you react. Hell, I should probably blame you as well. It all started with the fact that you answered the phone while you were naked in the tub." Gamon groans in complaint.

I giggle. "Then Jiseong should probably be annoying you too since he was the one that called me." I'm not trying to throw him under the bus, only pointing out that his complaints are silly.

"Oh, so the only one not causing problems aside from myself is Juah." He laughs. "Sounds about right actually." He takes a deep breath. "Goodnight, Teerak."

"Goodnight, Gamon."

Jiseong's chipper voice comes through the speaker. "And finally I got my phone back. What did you tell Gamon-hyung just now? He gave me that look he gives me when I have been causing trouble and mentioned something about being the instigator of all the problems tonight."

I tense up a little bit, hoping if he gets mad at me for throwing him under the bus that it won't last long. "Oh, did you hear his side of the conversation?"

"No, he gave me a look saying he wanted privacy. So, I went to my room for a minute."

I briefly relay over our conversation, without going into any real detail. "Um, he basically blamed everyone outside of you and Juah for eliciting enticing visuals in his mind. Enticing visuals involving me I mean." I clear my throat. "He blamed me for answering the phone in the tub, and I turned the table and pointed out that you were the one to call me." He lets out a sharp gasp that has me giggling in response. "Sorry."

"You're not sorry, and I will remember this."

"I'm trying to decide if I should be scared or not."

The playful tone is gone completely from his voice as he panics to make sure he knows that he was just kidding. "I would never ever hurt you, Lily! Never, I promise!"

"Shh. Jiseong." I frown at the abrupt change in mood. "I promise it's okay. I was only teasing. I know you would never intentionally cause anyone harm."

"That's not true, Lily. If anyone caused harm to someone I loved. I wouldn't hesitate." I've never heard this darkness in his voice, and I can't help but wonder where this is all coming from.

My mind conjures up the images I temporarily forgot about, and I grow worried about how he specifically might respond once he learns about them. "I think we all would do everything in our power to protect those we cared about the most."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to take the conversation to a dark place. I– I hope my mood won't make it hard for you to sleep tonight. Goodnight, Lily."

Before I can reassure him and respond the call is disconnected. Perhaps I'm not the only one hiding things.  

A/N:  I really hate delivering bad news. 😓  But here's the thing.  Somewhere along the way I lost track of where I was in correlation to what chapter I was posting.  I think it happened sometime with all the double chapter postings.  I've also been struggling a lot writing Chapter 34; I'm about halfway done, but I have been working on it for several weeks now and the words just weren't coming.  Now, if you don't know already, my rule of thumb is that I have to be writing at least five chapters ahead when posting new content.  Doing the simple math 𝞹📈🧠📚 you see I am behind a chapter and a half.  😔

I also have a lot of medical appointments coming up that are probably going to slow me done even more.  So, here is my current strategy, I am going to "plan" to take a break until the end of March.  If I should get well ahead of that before then (ten or more chapters) I will post sooner than scheduled. 🤞  If I am still behind for some reason. 😬  Then I will still post chapter 31 and let you know at that point what is going on.  

I truly am sorry, and thank you for following along with story up until now.  I can't begin to express how much it means to me.

If you would like to see the menu to the porridge restaurant I based that moment on you can find the link in the comments of this paragraph.