Pete's POV

"You need to get out of bed." I groan and throw a cushion at Ryan. "You know, I could swear there's an echo in here. I think I heard the same thing yesterday, and the day before, and the day before. Weird, it's very consistent." Ryan sighs and sits on the end of ou- my bed. "Look, Brendon, Gerard and I say the same thing because it's true. You need to get out of bed and get some fresh air. Go buy some flowers and give them to Mikey. Make him look pretty." Ryan suggests. I smile at Sparkles. "Mikey always complained about how he looked so I always told him he looked pretty. Prettier than flowers." Ryan sighs. "Well shit, no flowers then?"

"Nah, he'll appreciate the gesture." I kiss Sparkles and stand up. "Come with me? I...I'm gonna need your support." Ryan nods and follows me out my room. "Anything to get you outside." He mutters. "Hey it's alive!" Brendon cheers. I scowl at him and poke his face. "Don't be mean." I say in a babyish voice.

"Don't spend years in your room." He reiterates. "It's called mourning you dickwad." Brendon looks at his wrist. "Actually it's afternoon." I glare at him. "If you want to keep your face I suggest you slam it into a wall if that will get you to shut up." Brendon holds his hands up in surrender and backs away. "Just trying to lighten the mood." He says. "I'll lighten your room if you don't shut it."

"If you set my room on fire the whole house will burn." He yells. "Well you'll burn with it."

"That was uncalled for."

"So was your face."

"Now you're just being mean."

"Your mom was mean to the world when she gave birth to you and that giant ass forehead."

"Don't say shit about my mom."

"I'll just fuck her then."

"You're gay."

"You're a cunt, what's your point?"

"That's enough!" Ryan shouts. We both jump and cease arguing. "You're like children." He says. I shrug and point at Brendon. "Congratulations Brendon, you just made it onto my      I-wouldn't-cross-the-street-to-piss-in-your-hair-if-it-was-on-fire-list." Brendon flips me off and dissapears into his and Ryan's room. "He's just in a pissy mood 'cause his fish died." Ryan says. "Not Sergeant Bubbles!" I gasp. Ryan nods. I place my hand over my heart and close my eyes. "Long live Sergeant Bubbles. Make you rest in peace in fishy heaven." I open my eyes and nod at the ceiling. Ryan wrinkles his nose. "That would stink." I glare at him. "Sergeant Bubbles just died. Show a little respect." I snap. He rolls his eyes but nods at the ceiling. "Let's go get some flowers!" I shout, clapping my hands. "You're so gay." He laughs. I wink at him. "You know it baby."

"No flirting!" Brendon shouts from behind his door. "No promises!" I shout back. "Come on you nutcase." Ryan shakes his head and walks out the apartment, leaving me trailing after him. As we walk, we go past the barbers I got my hair dyed pink in. "Hey look it's Josh!" I say excitedly, pointing out the window. "Who's Josh?" Ryan asks. "He was the one who dyed my hair pink." I tell him. "I want to dye it again." Ryan looks at me shocked and follows me into the shop.

"Hey Josh!" I greet him. He looks up at me and smiles with all teeth. "Hey Pete. Let me introduce you to my boyfriend, this is Tyler." Tyler looks up and waves. I wave back and hand Josh $50. "I want it cut short again and dyed blonde this time." Josh nods and I go sit down. While he's washing it Ryan answers a call from Brendon.

"So, who you dying it for this time?" He asks conversationally. "It's for Mikey again but this time he won't see it. We're going to buy some flowers and visit him later."

"What happened?"

"He died." My throat feels blocked but I cough and smile, sniffling a little. "Well, we'll just have to make this hair cut the best." He says. I smile, grateful that he didn't do the classic "I'm sorry" because no one ever is. As Josh is putting the dye in Ryan comes back. "Brendon's not feeling great, he's thrown up a couple of times and has a fever."

"Do you want to go home? I can go see Mikey alone." Ryan shakes his head. "No I've spent too long trying to get you out of your room and I'm not leaving you alone." I smile at him and squeeze his hand. "Thanks Ry." Once the dye is washed out we thank Josh and leave. "The blonde suits you. I think these lilies are nice as well. Get him some lilies and a sunflower." We're currently looking through a large range of flowers. I sneeze and sniffle. "I think I'm allergic to bright shit." I groan. "Once an emo, always an emo." Ryan rolls his eyes. I flip him off and pay for the flowers.

"Are you ok? Do you want me to leave you two alone?" Ryan asks once we arrive. "Yeah please. Go call Bren, make sure he's ok." Ryan nods and kisses my cheek before skipping off. I place the flowers by the stone and place my hand on the ground beside it.

"I'm sorry I ran off I just...I wouldn't have been able to do it. I couldn't watch. I love you, I don't want you to think I don't, but that's just to much. I fucking watched you die Mikey, I can't watch anything else. Every morning I wake up and wish you were right beside me but you never are. You're never there. I look in the mirror and for one sweet second you're stood behind me, head on my shoulder, arms around my waist but then it's gone. You're gone and it's that day all over again. The day I ran, the day you chased me, the day you left me and then the day you died. All those things squashed into one brain and people won't let me end the pain."

My tears fall onto my hand and mingle with the mud but I don't feel them. "Make them let me die Mikes. I miss you, I want to kiss you. I wanna squeeze ya, please ya, share a slice of pizza, extra spicy but I can't 'cause you're gone and I'm all alone. I love you so so much. You're my sweet little dude."

I sit back on my heels and throw my head back, screaming at the sky "BRING HIM BACK OR TAKE ME WITH HIM!"

"Pete!" Ryan yells. I face him and see tears in his eyes and running down his cheeks. "It's Brendon," he sobs "he's in hospital."