~ eight ~

I practically dragged my feet into school as I clutched my coffee as if it were the most precious thing in the world. The bell rang, announcing that Friday's classes start now. Or, more importantly, I'm late.

The week has been full of nightmares, lack of sleep, an overload of homework, no social activity. Yeah. it's been one of those. Hence the coffee! If I need caffeine to function, it's an emergency.

I rushed into class, uttering a quick apology to Mrs. Carmichael before taking my seat. Hayleigh doesn't even bother to look at me questioningly anymore, seems how every morning has been the same all week. Tyrone looks a bit worried, but doesnt voice anything. I've probably blown my "friends" position with them by acting like this. Duke has steered clear of me, but then I remember saying I'd go see the match tomorrow. Stupid! I felt like smacking my forehead.

I finally release my death grip on my coffee and set it down as I rub my makeup-free face. Whether I had a headache or was trying too late to revive my facial features, I don't really know anymore.

I realized I wasn't really listening until something Mrs. Carmichael said struck panic through me.

"Today is the day that I said I would be choosing partners for the big project coming up. And everybody can guess who I struggled with the most." She said, laughing. "Hayleigh, you are quite the social butterfly and know literally EVERYBODY so I'm lucky I was able to find you a partner."

This earned a few laughs from Hayleigh and some other people, but I couldn't care less. I just hope I could get the most random person in this school. Not Hayleigh, not Tyrone, not Macey, not-

"Alright, here are the pairs, listen carefully. I don't want to have to repeat it a million times. Okay, so Hayleigh is to be partnered with Julie. Tyrone with Lillian. Xander with Andrew. Macey with Miles..." And the list went on and on with names from five different classes. I know that she didn't put any of these in alphabetical order or I would've been up first. The anxiety it gave me waiting for her to say my name was insurmountable.

"... and Asteria and Duke!"

That's it.

The whole universe is against me.

Hates me even.

It took everything in my being to not chuck my coffee at her and force her to switch me with someone else. So instead I put on my best show smile, trying not to look like I was gritting my teeth. One of my really bad habits.

The good thing about me being in first period is that Duke doesnt even know about our pairing yet, right? So that means I have time to run to my car, drive home, wait for my parents to get out of work, force them with whatever means necessary to let me drop out and switch schools, or even better yet, just drop out of school altogether! Who needs it anyways?

When the bell finally rang, I packed up my notebook and took off as fast as possible before I had anymore psychotic ideas. You'll be okay, Asteria. You always are. It's only for what, a month? A month!? I screech to a halt, the voices in my head over powering.

Before I decided to have a mental breakdown in the hallway, I ran to the bathroom and locked myself in a stall. I paced in the small space provided, which mainly consisted of spinning in circles. This is pathetic, Asteria. You seriously need to pull it together! You can't stay away from guys forever. They will always be in your life. Especially this one it seems. Yeah, the universe really does hate me.

I would have screamed into my hands if this bathroom wasn't a public one.

Wow, I really am pathetic.

I finally decided to exit the stall and walked to the sink to splash some water on my face. I smoothed out my hair and braided it down my back. I neglected it way too much this morning in my hysteria. I rubbed my cheeks a little bit to bring some color back that I'm sure I had lost the moment the teacher announced my partner. Duke. He doesn't seem like the worst guy, but I can't afford to think like that. This is a school project. It's not like we're gonna be deep and personal with each other. We'll be fine, I'll fine.

I breathe in. I breathe out.

I leave the bathroom and head towards my math class that I should have been in about five minutes ago. I sure am racking up tardies today. I stepped into class, dreading the moment I would have to seek out Duke sooner rather than later. 

✰✰✰

I profusely tapped my pencil against my desk. Very well earning glares of annoyance every five seconds. But I didn't care. I only cared about how I was going to survive the project. Nobody else showed disappointment in who they were paired with, but I did get looks of death wished upon me for getting paired with Duke. So I know I'm not the only one disappointed I got paired with him, but we're all just disappointed for different reasons. They all want him, but I don't. The irony. I just can't. You'd think this is some sort of cliche movie.

I somehow managed to keep my sanity through the rest of my classes until I got to lunch, then I felt the anxiety rise in my stomach. Again. When I walked into the cafeteria with my lunch tray, I felt all eyes on me. From every person, from every angle. It was so unnerving. I'm supposed to be the girl in the shadows, the invisible one. Not being able to attract anybody by beauty or personality alike. I'm just your below average person. Not now. I can only assume it's because all of the jealous girls in period one spread the word like wildfire. I roll my eyes. Another reason I shouldn't be associated with him or close to him in any way.

I quickly took a seat in between Tyrone and Hayleigh and set down my things. I dragged my hands down my face and groaned. I peeked through the cracks in my fingers when I noticed that the table is eerily quiet.

"What?"

Hayleigh just smirked at me and Tyrone continued eating, trying to disguise his smile.

"Whatttt?" I dragged out, starting to feel as annoyed as those jealous girls.

"Oh, nothin'," Hayleigh starts. "Its just that, you, the new girl, just happened to get a free ticket to the boy most desired by just about every single girl in this school. Looks like Mrs. Carmichael ships you two."

Her smirk grew even bigger, if that could even be possible, and my cheeks grew hot. It's a good thing that's all they do. If they turned red I'd be picked on for sure. I shook my head.

"Well, too bad for her. I'm not interested." I shoved a mouthful of salad in my mouth as if trying to convince everybody of this. Myself included.

"Sureeee. There's absolutely no way you don't think he's good looking." Everybody stared at me, awaiting confirmation from Hayleighs words. I'm gonna kill this girl.

"It doesn't matter what I think, so I'm neither confirming or denying that statement." I said, holding ground that I don't have. Now Hayleigh shakes her head.

"Off topic," thank you Tyrone, "But are you still planning on going to the match tomorrow?"

I nod my head at him while I finished chewing my salad. "Yeah. starts at 7:00, right?"

"Yup. have you ever watched boxing live before?" He asked excitedly.

"Um, no. I've never even watched it on TV," I said a bit sheepishly.

If I didn't give this info, it would have spared me the next half hour of basic boxing concepts that Tyrone tells me about, Xander also speaking up in some areas because I guess it's his sport too. I basically just nodded, half of what they were saying going in one ear and coming out the other. It doesn't sound the most interesting, but I already said I was going so there was really no backing out now.

When we started to part ways for class, Tyrone leaned over and whispered, "He'll be in the gym when school gets out." There was no need to specify who.

"Thanks. He finds out who he gets partnered with this period anyway. I'll bet he'll be thrilled." I rolled my eyes.

"I bet he actually will. He can't stand most girls in this school." Tyrone said in a tone I couldn't exactly decipher.

"Oh?" I wanted him to elaborate on this a bit more.

"Yeah. For years just about every girl here has tried to win him over, but they're just a bunch of self-obsessed whores if you ask me."

This just makes me laugh. "And he's not? Last time we spoke he talked about how many girls were in love with him, making himself sound all high and mighty. He sounded self-obsessed to me."

"Nah, he's a pretty good guy once you get to know him. I should know, I'm his best friend after all."

I stopped in my tracks. "Oh my gosh, I didn't mean-"

"No, I know you meant it and it is how he can be. You just don't really know him. It's all a shield." We continued walking until I arrived at English.

"I guess that's the point of the project, isn't it? Gettin' to know the dark stuff." Exactly what I DON'T want. "Well, this one's me. I'll cya later." I gave a wave.

"I'll cya later, Asteria." Tyrone returned the gesture and walked away.

I breathed out. Three more classes. Three more classes before the world starts to end. Dramatic? Perhaps, but it sure is how it feels. 

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