Day One Hundred and Fifty Four

Breakfast the next morning was difficult.

The atmosphere was heavy, a sense of finality hanging in the air like a weight they couldn't get rid of, as if they were standing on the precipice of something that they couldn't come back from. Or perhaps they had already crossed it, when the doors had opened early that morning with no sign of Stephen except for the missing bag and the footprints in the dirt that had blown into the maze corridor.

A line had been drawn in the sand of morality, and the glade was divided in which side they stood on.

Ada couldn't bring herself to eat, staring blankly at the porridge in her bowl. Avin looked between her and her food a few times before drumming his fingers on the table and clearing his throat awkwardly. "You gonna eat that? Because if not, I will."

"You've had two portions already." Nick raised his eyebrows. "How are you eating all of that?"

"Magic." Avin said around a mouthful of food. Porridge dribbled down onto his chin, and Gally winced from the other side of the table.

"You disgust me, didn't Ada raise you with any manners?"

"Don't pin this on me," Ada shrugged, "Alby's his mother."

"I'm whose what now?" Alby asked as he joined them. He watched as Avin swiped Ada's bowl and shook his head. "Are you seriously not eating again? You didn't touch dinner last night either. We're gonna end up with another Newt on our hands if you aren't careful."

Ada grimaced. "Too soon, Alby."

"Sorry." He said. "But seriously, Ada, I thought you were on board with the banishment. We all agreed it was for the best."

"Not all of us." She gestured with her spoon around the rest of the breakfast area. It was unusually quiet, the sound of laughter noticeably absent as the boys glumly stared at the tables. "I just can't help but feel like we made the wrong choice."

Alby clenched his jaw. "Well, it's too late to change it now. We'll just have to find a way to live with what we did."

Nick cleared his throat, cutting through the tense silence that engulfed them. "You heading into the maze today, Alby?"

"Yeah. I think Newt's coming with me today."

"Speaking of," Gally said, "where is Newt. I haven't seen him since last night." He glanced around the glade as if Newt would suddenly spring up out of the earth in front of him. Ada glanced down at the table again, lips twisting into a frown. Something strange settled in her stomach as she recalled their conversation in the medical room last night.

"Dunno," Avin said, "but he needs to hurry otherwise I'm gonna have his porridge too."

Nick looked at him incredulously, mouthing the word how as Alby spoke up. "I'll go find him in a second."

"Are you gonna look for Stephen?" Ada asked before she could stop herself. "Today, in the maze. Are you gonna look for Stephen?" The table went quiet again as five pairs of eyes turned to Alby for an answer.

Alby gulped down a mouthful of water before slowly setting the canteen down. "If we find him then that's that. If not, then I'm not worried."

Ada blanched. "How can you be so cavalier about this? We killed someone."

"Technically, the griever killed him." Alby shrugged.

"If he's even dead," Nick chimed in, crossing his arms, "which he might not be."

A commotion from the other side of the outdoor mess hall caught their attention, and Ada felt a stab of panic rise in her as she watched Isaac shrug off two of the boys he was eating with, his face red with growing rage.

"You don't get to say that." He spat. "How dare you?"

"What's going on?" Alby asked, forcing his way through the growing crowd and crossing his massive arms over his chest. Ada followed, heart in her throat.

"I'm not wrong." Ennie shrugged, glaring hard at Isaac. "The guy was nuts. He deserved what he got."

Isaac gulped, the tears in his eyes shining. "I know what he did was wrong, but-"

"The dude stabbed someone." Archie raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, Stephen was wrong."

That weight was back, wrapping heavy arms around her, and it only worsened as Isaac took two steps back, closer to the west doors. "I know. I tried to stop him, but he wouldn't listen."

Alby seemed to realise what was happening the same time Ada did, his entire body going tense like a live wire. "Isaac-"

"He made it sound so easy." A tear slipped down Isaac's cheek, and he wiped it away furiously. "Escaping. He made it sound like he had this grand plan, that he could get us out. And I wanted to believe him so badly."

"Isaac," Ada raised her hands slowly, as if approaching a wild animal, "Isaac, don't."

"I don't want to be here anymore." He said softly. "I don't want to be here. Maybe Stephen found a way out, maybe he escaped-"

"Stephen's dead, Isaac." Alby said, not unkindly, his face showing an unusual amount of compassion. "He's not coming back. No amount of wishing otherwise is gonna make that true."

"Maybe." Isaac said. His eyes darted to the west doors, his entire body suddenly looking so weak, so frail, it was a miracle he was still standing. His blonde hair was plastered to his forehead with sweat. "But I don't wanna be here without him. He was the only good thing..." he broke off, inhaling deeply. "He was the only thing that made being here worth it."

Ada took a step forward. "Isaac-"

"I can't do it anymore." He said.

Before Ada could open her mouth to say anything more, Isaac was gone, sprinting through the maze doors that suddenly seemed too close, dodging the hands that grabbed at him. Alby swore and took off after him, vanishing around the corner, but Ada knew it was no use. There was a certain look in Isaac's eyes that she recognised. She had seen it in Newt's eyes when he was refusing to eat. She had seen it in George's eyes that last night by the tree. She had seen it in Alby's eyes that night by the fire the night they carved their names into the wall.

It was a look she imagined often stained her own features.

There was a moment of heavy silence where the glade seemed to hold its breath before the crunch of footsteps disturbed the dewy grass beside her. Newt tucked his hands into his pockets, frowning.

"Uh... what did I miss?"

—

The box came up that afternoon, with four new fresh faced Gladers inside.

Alby and Newt were still in the maze, which meant that Ada was the one in charge of settling them in. She had lived with a group of twenty teenage boys for five months, and yet the urge to murder someone had never been so strong as when their questions reached an almost unbearable point. Her answers were unhelpful, she was sure, she couldn't remember. Her head felt as if it were stuffed full of cotton balls, her mind in the maze with the other runners.

Would they find Isaac in time? She wondered bleakly. Even if they did, she was sure they wouldn't be able to bring him back. The glade may have felt like home to the rest of them, but to some the four walls still felt like the prison she had recognised it as when she had first come up.

She lit the last torch and shoved the end into the ground, a soft glow illuminating the sand pit outside the homestead. "Remind me again why we didn't light the bonfire?" Nick asked, wiping a bead of sweat from his brow as he straightened, wiping his dirty hands on his even dirtier jeans.

"The bonfire is for celebrating." Avin said, sitting cross legged on one of the wooden logs that surrounded the unlit pile of wood. "I don't really think any of us feel like celebrating right now." His hands were playing with a small wooden carving, which he was chipping away at with a sharp blade. Ada kept one eye on him the entire time.

"Poor bastards," Gally chuckled, "these new shanks are the only Greenies that don't get a bonfire celebration."

"They'll live." Ada muttered. Her eyes flickered back to the maze doors, watching the steadily descending sun anxiously.

Gally picked up a twig from the floor and tossed it at her gently, the wood thudding against her shin. His eyebrows were arched when she looked over at him, as if he had been calling her name for a while. "They'll be fine, Ada. They'll be back in just a second."

"The doors are gonna close soon." She said quietly. Annoyed by the locks of hair that kept falling into her face, she reached back to scoop it into a ponytail. "I don't want Alby and Newt getting trapped out there."

"Speaking of Newt," Nick's tone was strangely suggestive as he leant against an unlit torch, "what happened between you guys last night?"

Ada nearly tripped over nothing. "What?"

"You guys were in the med hut for an awfully long time, that's all." Nick grinned wolfishly, his teeth gleaming white in the low light.

"We - I -" Ada stammered, face turning as red as her hair. The memory of Newt's fingers brushing her shoulder, of his face buried in her hair, swallowed her whole until she felt like she was drowning.

"Oh, gross," Gally grimaced, "she's blushing."

Ada threw the stick back at him, considerably harder this time. "Nothing happened. I popped my stitches and he sowed me back up, that's all."

Nick turned to Avin with a grin. The young boy was shaking his head, snickering, watching the back and forth with an amused smile. "Hear that Avin? I think-"

"Nobody cares what you think." Ada interrupted him.

"I care what he thinks." Avin said innocently. "Please continue, Nick."

Ada stared at him with wide eyed betrayal. "Et tu, Avin?"

"Et what now?"

Gally shuddered, fake gagging around his finger. "Let's change the subject before I barf."

Ada opened her mouth furiously to combat it, but was interrupted as a familiar figure came jogging up to them. Alby's face was drawn tight with stress, and when he came to a stop beside them Ada noticed how exhausted he seemed. He looked as if he had aged a decade in a matter of hours, dark shadows smudging under his weathered eyes.

"Anything?" She asked wearily, not sure what she wanted the answer to be.

"No." Alby said gruffly. "No sign of either of them. It's like they just vanished."

Ada sighed, tiredness welling up inside her. "I can come with you tomorrow. More eyes-"

"No." Alby said again, stronger this time. "You were stabbed, like, three days ago, Ada. You're not ready to run again."

"But-"

"We're fine with just Newt." Alby said.

Gally glanced around the glade, brows furrowed. "For the second time today I'm gonna ask where that shank has run off to."

"He went back to the Homestead." Alby shrugged. "Been quiet all day. Probably in shock. Says he probably isn't coming down tonight."

Three new gladers passed by, staring up at the walls with bewilderment. Alby stared after them, blinking slowly.

"Am I hallucinating? Who are these shanks?"

"Did you forget it was box day?"

"Fucking box day." Alby muttered, running a hand down over his face. He turned on his heel and followed them, likely to introduce himself and try and figure out if they knew their names yet, both of which were things Ada didn't bother doing earlier. She shifted uncomfortably, staring at the new faces.

"Don't worry," Nick smirked, seemingly reading her mind, "it's not like we have Stephen to turn the newbies against you this time. You have plenty of time to introduce yourself."

Ada shot him a glare. "Piss off, Nick."

—

Thick smoke churned into the air, black and heavy as it wrapped itself around the night sky, fleeing the flames that chased it towards the stars.

Ada watched the wisps dance around themselves until they vanished, the torch below them sputtering its last dying breaths. Time had turned the flames to embers, and the sparks now lying on the wood were flickering feebly. Nick had relit the other ones as they died out, and would likely return soon to breathe new life into the flames.

Someone sat down on the grass beside her, a graceful movement she didn't recognise as she turned her face away from the torch. One of the new gladers sat beside her, staring down at her with inquisitive and narrow eyes. They were so brown they were almost black, only a few shades lighter than his thick hair, inky black and somehow perfectly quaffed. His blue shirt was rolled up at the sleeves, showing off the impressive muscles on his arms. One arm came around the back of the log she was leaning against, the other lifting as he held out his hand for her to shake.

"Hey, I'm Minho."

Ada smiled politely and ignored his outstretched hand. "Ada."

Minho rose an eyebrow in amusement, withdrawing his hand and smirking at her. "We didn't get a chance to talk much earlier."

"Yeah, sorry. I was... distracted."

"We're surrounded by a death maze filled with deadly monsters, who can blame you." Upon seeing her bewildered expression, Minho shrugged. "Or so I've heard."

Ada huffed out a disbelieving laugh, not quite sure what to make of his cavalier attitude.

"So, you're the only girl here?" Minho glanced around the glade before turning back to her, and Ada was relieved to see no scepticism on his face, only blatant curiosity, as if she were a puzzle piece he couldn't quite make out. Ada nodded, lips pursed. Minho let out a low whistle, puffing his cheeks out in a way that had her smiling. "That's rough."

"Honestly?" She said, turning her body slightly in his direction. "That's been the least of my worries since I got here."

"Right, because of the whole -"

"- Death maze with deadly monsters thing, yeah." Ada nodded.

"So, these Greeders..."

"Grievers." She corrected.

Minho waved her off with a dirt streaked hand. "Grievers, whatever. They just live in the maze?"

Ada nodded, looking back at the torch. Suddenly she didn't want to see Minho's face, no matter how good looking he happened to be. She didn't want to watch the fear slowly creep in and wipe away the carefree attitude he seemed to be sporting. She couldn't remember the last time anyone had spoken to her without the lingering fear of the day haunting their every move. Couldn't remember the last time she had met someone that didn't look at her as if they were expecting her to fix all of their problems. A fierce wave rose up inside of her like a storm, and she vowed to herself that she wouldn't let the horrors of the glade touch Minho. She would protect that joyful spark in his eye and the leap in his step like she couldn't do with the other gladers.

An image rose up unbidden in her mind of Newt's tired eyes and weary posture, of his blank gaze and joyless smile. He was still in his room moping, she supposed. Just as she was considering going to make sure he was okay, Minho spoke up again.

"Where do they come from?"

Ada blinked at him in confusion before remembering that they were talking about the Grievers. "Oh, we don't know."

"What do they do?"

"Just... roam around the maze at night, I guess." She shrugged. She hadn't exactly spent a lot of time thinking about the purpose of the Grievers beyond the fact that they guarded the maze and all but guaranteed a one way ticket to the afterlife if you came across one.

"What do they look like?"

Disgusting, horrifying, too hideous to even put into words. "Nightmare fuel." She settled on.

"What do they eat?"

"Scared and amnesiac children." Ada said roughly. She turned to face him fully, crossing her arms in frustration. "Now are you done with the twenty questions?"

Minho raised his hands in surrender, grinning at the furrow between her brows and the stubborn set of her jaw. "Yes ma'am." He winked at her. "Now c'mon, carrot top, introduce me to some people around here."

"What did you just call me?" The lighthearted grin on his face told her he was joking. She elbowed him hard in the ribs, her own smile growing when he doubled over. "Hey, Gally!" She waved the boy over from his position by one of the torches. "C'mere, meet Minho."

"Hey." Minho wheezed out. Gally raised one arched eyebrow and looked at Ada with an unamused expression.

"What did you do to him?"

"He's asthmatic."

Minho coughed out a laugh. "Nice to meet you."

"You too, shank." Gally smiled tightly. It was almost amusing watching him struggle to socialise. "You put your name on the wall yet?"

"Yeah, wanted to fill up the giant gap you guys left in the middle, but Alby wouldn't let me." Minho rolled his eyes. "Said I had to leave space for the others or whatever. Spoilsport."

Gally chuckled awkwardly before jerking this thumb over his shoulder. "I'm gonna get back to Nick, we were talking about making more slammers, just in case. Was nice to meet you, Minho."

"He seems like a delight." Minho said sarcastically once Gally was out of earshot.

"He's a sweetheart when he warms up to you." Ada smiled fondly at Gally's retreating back before turning back to Minho, who was staring down at her with a seemingly permanent spark of mischief in his eyes.

"Does he have a brain injury?" Minho asked mildly.

"Uh... no?"

"Then what's with the weird words? Did I miss something where Shank and Slammer are part of the English language?"

Ada let out a bark of laughter, suddenly realising that the slang they had grown accustomed to using wasn't something any of them had ever explained to the new gladers of the past few months. They must have been so confused listening to these strange people use their strange language in this strange place. "You'll grow to get used to how things work around here. I'm still a little unclear on that one."

"So he could have been insulting me?"

"It's Gally," Ada shrugged, "it's always a possibility."

"Really selling the whole 'he's a sweetheart' thing."

"He just has to get used to you first."

"Then it is my personal mission to annoy him as much as possible until he likes me." Minho said determinedly. He nodded, clearly proud of himself, as Ada scoffed in disbelief.

"Oh, yeah," she agreed. "Bully him into friendship, that'll sure do it."

"Not bullying." He rolled his eyes. "More like lighthearted pranking."

"Oh, you and Avin are gonna get along just fine." Ada gestured to the younger boy, playing naughts and crosses with Alby in the sand. Judging by the dramatic frown on Alby's face, Avin was winning. "He locked Gally in the outhouse one time and shook it. I don't need to tell you how much that boy stank for the rest of the day."

"I shall ask the grandmaster for advice then." Minho winked.

"Just give him extra bacon and you won't be able to get him to shut up. He's easy to bribe like that."

"Ah," Minho looked her up and down dramatically, "pretty and offers advice on bribery. I'm keeping you."

"This is my glade, buddy." Ada shook her head. "Technically I'm keeping you."

"Ada." A terse voice came from her right, and when Ada looked up she saw Newt standing staring down at them, an unreadable expression on his face.

"There you are." Ada crossed her arms, unimpressed. "Done brooding?"

He didn't reply, instead eyeing up Minho with an odd look she'd never seen on him before. His lips were pursed slightly, and he looked annoyed, but she couldn't figure out who she was annoyed at. Her? Himself? "Who's your friend?" He asked eventually.

Minho held out his hand with a charming grin that even Newt apparently wasn't immune to, judging by the slight upwards quirk of his lips. It was a far cry from the friendly and teasing grin she knew he was capable of, but she considered it a win regardless. "Minho." He introduced himself. "Pleasure to meet you."

Ada scoffed. It was like watching someone meet their partner's parents for the first time, oozing charm and sweetness that covered up mischief and snark. Newt frowned as he glanced down at her, small smile dimming slightly, even as he introduced himself to Minho.

Newt's eyes landed on Minho's arm, which was still resting on the log at her back. He tilted his head and looked away quickly. "Food's ready." He said simply, his voice strangely hollow. "You need to eat."

"We'll be there in a second." Ada shot Newt an inquisitive look but he ignored her, instead staring intently at the ground. He hummed noncommittally before turning on his heel and not looking back.

"... I take it he has to warm up to you as well?" Minho asked, raising a judgemental eyebrow at Newt's back. Ada found her frustration rising at Newt's hot and cold attitude, and she turned back to Minho with a dry smile.

"No, that one is an ass."

Slowly getting to her feet, Ada watched as the final few embers died, crumbling to dust right in front of her. She kicked Minho's shin gently and tilted her head towards the kitchens. "C'mon," she smiled, "let me introduce you to Charles, he makes the best steak."

—

Newt couldn't quite pinpoint the moment where his world shifted on its axis, but suddenly a place he had grown to see in dazzling shades of green and blue had been muted into something of a grey blur.

The breath in his lungs felt wrong, the hammock against his back at night felt hard as stone, and the grass beneath his feet felt like daggers digging into his skin. Not even the sounds of gentle laughter and obnoxious chatter could drag him from the hourglass he felt trapped in, slowly watching the sand trickle through his desperate fingers.

From his position against the pillar at the edge of the homestead, Newt could see the majority of the area they had put aside for the bonfire. It was a stretch of land just outside the kitchens, opposite the stairs that led up to the medical hut, with patches of sand and logs positioned at random surrounding a large pile of unburnt wood from the deadheads. On nights such as these the flames usually stretched high and proud into the air, illuminating the glade in a soft glow that chased away the monsters lurking in the shadows.

Tonight, however, the only light was the fickle glow of two dozen torches positioned at random in the ground. Although the warm luminescence lit the glade well enough, the darkness that crept in along the edges was far more pronounced, its inky tendrils lying in wait for the flames to snuff themselves out so that they could pounce.

Something shuffled to his right, startling Newt. Alby leant against the pillar beside him, stoic and dark, watching over the glade with impassive eyes that Newt knew held a storm beneath them.

"You're brooding." Alby said simply, raising an eyebrow at Newt when he scoffed.

"I'm not brooding."

Why did everyone seem to think he was brooding, he thought miserably. What was wrong with leaning against a pillar and watching the world go by instead of interacting with people?

"Moping, then, whatever you want to call it. You gonna tell me what's going on with you?" Alby raised his eyebrows expectantly, staring at Newt with such scrutiny that he suddenly wanted nothing more than to go hide in the hammock he had just crawled out of.

"... No."

How could he even begin to describe to Alby what he himself didn't know? This hollow feeling that seemed to swallow him whole from the inside out, gnawing at him until it consumed his every waking moment. The only times he didn't feel like he was drowning in it was when he was with –

"Ada seems to be enjoying herself." Alby chuckled to himself, jutting his chin towards the bonfire. Newt followed his gaze mindlessly and immediately wished that he didn't.

Ada was leaning against one of the logs, legs tucked up in front of her, fiery hair falling down her shoulders in untamed waves. The light surrounding her was limited, but he could still see the golden flecks sparking in her eyes when she leaned too close to the flickering embers. She was laughing, Newt realised with a jolt in his chest.

He couldn't remember the last time he had seen her laugh like that, so carefree and joyful, the weight that she carried around on her shoulders seemingly vanished into thin air along with the smoke from the torch in front of her. Something warm settled in his chest.

Minho was sat beside her again, with tan skin and perfectly styled hair, grinning down at her teasingly. Two empty plates sat discarded on the grass beside them. He couldn't help but notice how close together they were sat, how her body was turned into his slightly as she smiled up at him. Had she ever smiled at him that way? He didn't think so.

That warm feeling vanished.

Newt didn't realise just how hard he was frowning until Alby scoffed beside him. "Fool." He said simply.

"Excuse me?"

"You gonna do anything about that?"

"About what?" Newt asked. He glanced quickly around the glade to make sure he hadn't missed any misdeed or commotion that would send Alby spiralling. "Nick stealing food from the kitchen? I thought it was funny, but if it's bothering you that much I guess I can-"

"You're both as stupid as each other." Alby rolled his eyes. Newt blinked, feeling as if he and Alby were having two entirely separate conversations.

"Me and Nick?"

"Oh my god." Alby rolled his eyes again, so hard Newt was sure he would give himself a migraine if he wasn't careful. "You and Ada, you moron."

Newt felt as though he had been slapped. "Me and – me and Ada? What -"

"You seriously have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?" Alby asked, but there was no judgement in his voice, just genuine disbelief. "Man, you are thick."

Newt was starting to feel awfully insulted.

"Let me know when you realise, okay? Lord knows we could do with something interesting happening around here."

In all fairness, Newt thought that the maze filled with monsters they were trapped in was fairly interesting all on its own, but he kept that thought to himself as his eyes found their way back to Ada. He watched the smile on her face grow and felt his frown deepen. He was aware of Alby watching him intently for God knows what reason, but didn't move his eyes away. For some strange reason, something heavy was twisting in his stomach, making him nauseous.

Perhaps he was coming down with something. He made a mental note to talk to the medjacks about it the next day.

Newt watched with curiosity as the new glader reached up to ruffle Ada's hair, and stiffened when she flinched away from him, casually redirecting him with a remark that had him laughing boisterously. "Why does she do that?" He wondered aloud, not really expecting an answer. Alby sighed and the teasing quirk of his lips settled into a stoic line.

"It's just a boundary she has. She won't touch you, you don't touch her. Something about the skin on skin contact wigs her out, I think. I don't know, I'm not going to ask." He shot Newt a stern look. "And neither are you. I've already talked to the others about it. It's her business. I don't even know if she knows why she does it, but if she can remember then it's up to her if she tells you. We clear?"

Newt's eyebrows rose as he shot Alby a placating glance. "Crystal." He nodded. But it didn't stop him from thinking about it, not as Alby muttered something about 'clueless fools' under his breath and walked away, not as he watched Ada and Minho joke and laugh with each other with something strange and foreign twisting in his stomach, not even as the final torches winked themselves out of existence and life in the glade ceased for the night until the sun awoke it again the next morning.

But even as the sound of light snores and snuffling filled his ears, Newt found himself wide awake and staring at the splintered wooden ceiling, trying to understand the foreign feelings that were rising inside him like a wave, slowly pulling him under.