Eighteen | THE RISING STORM
Day Three Hundred and Sixty Five
Ada dragged the dagger down the wall in a harsh line, watching the white line appear in the unforgiving stone, one of many. She tracked them with her eyes, counting them for the third time that morning, just to be sure. Three hundred and sixty five lines made up a series of tallies and criss-crosses stretched along the lower edge of the wall behind the homestead.Three hundred and sixty five markings, for the three hundred and sixty five days they had been there.
"A whole year." Alby had said quietly that morning, staring idly at the maze walls. "We've been here a whole year."
Ada had shoved the food around her plate idly and hummed, not sure what to do with the information. One year since she had woken up in that box, no idea who or where she was, or why she was there.
One year since Luke had been killed.
Now she stared at the tally and wondered how many more lines she would have to draw before they escaped.
"Yo, Ada," Gally's head appeared around the corner of the homestead, "box came up, come say hi to the new greenie."
Ada turned away from the wall and tilted her head. "Greenie? As in singular?"
"Yeah." Gally nodded. "Only one came up."
Unease settled inside her as she rounded the side of the Homestead and was faced with the rest of the glade, crowded with people now. She hadn't counted, but there were easily over forty people there. The glade, with new buildings heaped together haphazardly here and there, crawling with gladers running around like ants, was a well oiled machine a far cry away from the empty and isolated space she had arrived in.
Just as she had finally settled into a routine, with months since their last escape attempt and loss, the Creators threw another wrench in the system. "Why do you think only one new Greenie came up?" Gally asked, walking alongside her. "Think that's something to worry about?"
"Doubtful." She shrugged. "Wouldn't surprise me if it's just whoever put us here switching things up because they're bored. Or maybe it's just because we've been here for a year now, who knows?"
Gally let out a low whistle and shook his head. "Damn, can't believe we've been here a whole year."
"Whose we?" Ada echoed, staring up at him incredulously.
"Fine, you've been here a year." He rolled his eyes affectionately and nudged her with his elbow. The amber liquid sloshed in the mason jar he was holding.
Ada eyed it curiously, not recognising it. Their drinking options were limited to water and the strange crushed berry and water mixture that James had discovered a few months after his arrival. Excluding, of course, the time that Connor thought it would be a good idea to drink raw milk. He had been violently ill for weeks after, and no one was eager to try it again any time soon.
"What is that you're carrying, by the way?" She poked the jar, squinting at the strange drink. "Did you piss in a jar or something?"
"Oh, this?" Gally held it out to her. "Just a little something I cooked up for tonight's celebration. Here, try some."
Ada eyed it warily. "... Did you piss in a jar?"
Gally rolled his eyes and shook his head. He lifted the jar to his lips and took a sip before holding it out to her expectantly. Ada took it slowly and rose it to her lips, wincing as a bitter taste exploded over her tongue. The liquid burned her throat as it went down, making her eyes water unexpectedly.
Gally bit back a laugh at the twisted expression on her face. "Good?"
"Oh yeah." She nodded, coughing as she handed it back to him. "So great."
"Wonderful, because I made a bunch more for tonight."
"So fun." Ada winced, eyes watering, and turned back towards the box. "So so fun."
Alby was walking alongside another boy, scrawny with choppy blonde hair that came down to his shoulders. When he spotted her, he raised his hand in greeting, waving her over. "Ada, this is our newest Greenie. Greenie, this is Ada, the woman in charge."
The boy extended his hand, smiling timidly, but she ignored it with a polite smile. "Nice to meet you." Ada glanced at Alby. "He didn't come up with anyone?"
"Nope." Alby clapped a hand down onto the Greenie's shoulder, grinning in a way that was slightly strained.
He was worried, she knew, although he didn't dare show it. Not after four months of peace, not in front of a new boy. They had learned the hard way that a first impression of fear would lead to nothing but resentment and terror. Which was precisely why they didn't allow more than three questions to be asked until after the welcome bonfire. It was a decision they had made just before Archie's death, to give the gladers more time to settle in and see that life in the glade wasn't all too bad. 'If they can see a home before they see a threat,' Alby had said, 'then maybe they have a better chance of surviving.'
Despite the frustration the new gladers seemed to feel, he was right.
"Which means he's gonna be the guest of honour at tonight's celebration." Alby continued, gesturing mildly towards where the bonfire was being piled high with sticks, a skeleton of one of the dead animals displayed above it. Minho insisted it looked cool, but Ada couldn't find it in herself to agree.
"Celebration?" The new greenie asked.
"You didn't tell him?" Ada smiled as she waved around the glade. "All the new greenies get a celebration of some sort. Once a month we have a bonfire as a welcome party, so to speak."
"I didn't get a bonfire." Minho said sulkily as he passed them, dodging Ada's attempts to trip him.
"Ignore Minho, he's a drama queen." Gally rolled his eyes.
Minho looked back over his shoulder and winked teasingly. "You adore me."
"I despise you."
"A very friendly atmosphere, as you can see." Alby smirked. He glanced around, searching for someone, and waved Avin over. "This is Avin, he's gonna give you the tour and help you pick out a place to sleep."
Avin's eyes lit up. "I am?"
"Sure are buddy." Alby ruffled his hair and turned him towards the Homestead, leaning towards the new greenie as he did. "I'd avoid putting your bunk by Minho's," he whispered conspiratorially, "he snores."
Ada watched the two of them disappear, smiling fondly at Avin's retreating back. "How's he doing?" She asked when they were out of earshot. "Feeling better?"
"Seems to be." Alby nodded. Avin had been quiet all morning, teary and sullen for reasons he wouldn't share with them. Ada knew it was because they had reached the one year mark, and his hope was slowly dwindling just like the rest of theirs. But the glade had become his home, it was clear to see in how comfortable he was in everything he did.
"He seems to enjoy the extra workload." Gally noted. "Guess it gives him something to do."
"You heard what he said that day," Ada shrugged, "he wanted to feel useful. If giving him extra tasks here and there helps him feel more at home, then that's what we'll do."
"Ada's just thrilled it means she doesn't have to give the tours anymore." Alby smirked.
Ada scowled. She hated the tours.
"Newt promised he could draw up some maps with him when he gets back." Gally said idly as they made their way towards the slammers to start unloading the new supplies. "Should give him something to do this evening."
"He's not back yet?" Ada frowned, casting a concerned glance at the maze doors. "I thought he was finished for the day, I saw him at lunch."
"Must have headed back in." Alby shrugged, not looking overly concerned. "You know what he's been like recently. Can barely get him out of there." Seeing the expression on her face, Alby stopped what he was doing and smiled gently down at her. "I'm sure it's nothing."
"Yeah." Ada nodded, but that tendril of worry wouldn't dissipate. "He has been in there an awful lot, do you think he's alright?"
"How would we know?" Gally rolled his eyes. "You're the only shank he talks to."
"That's not true." Ada protested. "He talks to you lot all the time."
"Haven't had a proper conversation with the slinthead in over a month now." Alby shrugged.
That branch of concern inside her grew. Her and Newt had talked a lot ever since their conversation by the watch tower nearly four months ago, but not enough to warrant him shutting out the other gladers entirely. "Are you sure?"
Gally nodded, shooting her a pitying smile. "He's just not a very sociable guy, that's all. Like Alby said, I'm sure it's nothing."
"Hmm."
"How did your little talk with him go anyway? You know, the night you two snuck off to the watchtower."
Way to make it sound suggestive, she thought, fighting back a blush. "It was good. We talked things out."
"Yeah?" Alby crossed his arms and stared at her with a look so intense it had her wincing. "That all you do?"
"... what else would we have done?"
"Clueless fools." He muttered, turning away with an eye roll so severe she was sure he gave himself a headache. "Ignore me, don't know what I was thinking, it's not like you've been plastered to each other's sides for months now."
In all fairness, Ada could admit, they had been spending a lot of time together. But that was what happened when you were trapped inside four walls with someone for nearly a year. They were bound to get close eventually.
Newt had finally stopped ignoring her after that night, and what had first been tentative words shared when running or eating dinner had grown into joking and laughing in a way they hadn't done in a long time. She had missed his bright smiles and banter, the way his eyes would sparkle mischievously whenever he pushed her buttons just for the sake of getting a rise out of her.
But despite the peace that seemed to have settled over them, there was something dark lurking at the edges of her vision. She saw it every time Newt's smile would dim when he thought she wasn't watching, when he would lock himself in the map room after his shift in the maze and not come out for hours, studying the infernal circles of the maze until his eyes crossed and his shoulders sagged with exhaustion, when she would wake to hear him toeing on his boots and shuffling around the glade after another night of restless sleep.
He thought she didn't notice, but she did. Newt watched the maze, and Ada watched Newt, so she saw it all.
"We lost her again." Minho's voice cut through the fog, and when she looked up Ada was surprised to see him standing in front of her, arms crossed and an amused expression on his smug face.
Ada blinked. "When the hell did you get here?"
Gally rolled his eyes fondly. "C'mon, get your ass over here and help, got a lot to do before tonight's celebration."
Ada shrugged and walked over to them. Newt would be fine, she was sure. As she started unloading the crates into the slammers, she tried to ignore the voice in the back of her head that told her she was lying to herself.
—
The walls of the map room, shabby as they may be, offered a certain comfort to Ada that she struggled to find elsewhere in the glade. The damp, earthy scent, the wooden slats with their lopsided carvings, and the domed wooden ceiling that begrudgingly allowed the sunlight to creep in — she breathed it in, that long missed feeling of peace slowly returning as she watched Newt move around the space.
It was large enough for the both of them, easily, yet she kept her back pressed against the closed door, staring at him silently as he gathered pieces of paper and organised them into groups, muttering under his breath. Her eyes caught on the half built structure on the table, a colossal thing that took up most of the floor space.
It was the maze, or it was meant to be, at least, the broken twigs bound together by strings of grass forming a massive half circle around an empty square in the middle. Minho had taken one look at it and had demanded that he be allowed to 'spruce it up' and 'make it more accurate', whatever that meant. As far as she knew, he was still gathering supplies to construct miniature versions of the buildings. 'It's to help us map the maze, it's not supposed to look pretty' Alby had argued when he had found Minho and Newt crouching over a tiny version of the Homestead.
Neither had listened, and the model was coming along nicely.
"That's looking good." Ada nodded her head at the model.
Newt barely looked up from where he was organising the drawings of the maze, humming noncommittally.
Ada tilted her head, eyes narrowing. "Minho was thinking about heading into the maze tomorrow, exploring section five and some of the outer ring. Wanna join?"
"Sure, sure," Newt said, distractedly, still not looking up.
"I'm also gonna raise a litter of Grievers in your hammock, so just wanted to prepare you for that."
"Sounds good." Newt reached over to alter one of the walls on the model, still staring fixedly at the map.
And we've lost him, Ada thought, uncrossing her arms and moving further into the room. "Oi, Newt." She picked up one of the snapped twigs, flicking it at him. It bounced off his forehead, clearing that distracted from his eyes as he turned to her angrily.
"What the bloody hell was that for?" He asked, rubbing his forehead.
"You weren't giving me attention."
Newt rolled his eyes, but he couldn't stop the amused quirk of his lips as he turned back to the map. "My apologies, I forgot you get needy when people ignore you for more than five minutes."
"Shouldn't be ignoring me at all," Ada grumbled, leaning against the table beside him, "I'm the light of your goddamn life."
"Yes, my earth and stars revolve around you." Newt rolled his eyes, bowing mockingly in her direction before turning back to the wall covered with maps.
Ada hated herself for blushing.
"Goddamnit." Newt said suddenly, tossing the paper onto the table angrily, "This doesn't fit, why doesn't it fit?"
"Maybe you missed a turn." Ada said softly, picking up the map and studying the harsh lines he had drawn whilst out in the maze. "We can go back tomorrow and check."
"I didn't miss a turn, I can't have."
"Hey," Ada reached forward and put a tentative hand on his arm, "Newt, it's okay. You should have seen the mess Alby and I made when we were first mapping this place out. It's a miracle we made any progress at all."
Newt didn't respond, instead raising his hands up to his forehead, pressing hard as if to stave off a growing headache. His eyes were wild, desperate in a way she felt didn't quite match the situation. Ada pursed her lips, looking harder at him. She had looked at Newt plenty over the last few months, but she hadn't actually looked at him. Purple shadows hung under his eyes like bruises, weighing down his entire body. His shoulders seemed to be constantly turned downwards as if an invisible weight rested on them.
But it was the look in his eyes that unnerved her the most. She hadn't seen that kind of helplessness in them since he had starved himself nearly eight months prior.
"Newt," Ada asked softly, her voice breaking through the quiet of the wooden shack, "are you sure you're alright?"
Newt's voice was muffled against his fingers as he spoke, eyes clenched firmly shut. "We're missing something. We have to be missing something."
"We'll keep on looking-"
"What, for another year?" He snapped. Remorse flashed across his face and he glanced at her regretfully before she could react. "That wasn't fair of me. Sorry, Ada."
"If we have to," Ada said after a moment, the thought twisting her stomach unpleasantly, "then yeah, for another year. But we will get out of here eventually."
"You don't know that, Ada." Newt said, his voice flat.
She wanted to tell him that she did, that she was sure of it, but she couldn't bring herself to. Hope of an escape was an unreachable ship on the water slowly sinking further into the horizon the more they stretched their arms out to it. So she didn't say anything, and could do nothing but watch as that blankness in his eyes grew and swallowed him whole.
"Newt..."
He turned his head to face her, and Ada felt the words leave her as she processed just how close she was actually standing to him. He was leaning heavily against the table, his shoulders slumped, so the top of her head came level to his eyes.
Her hand fisted involuntarily on his jacket. Newt seemed to have noticed the same thing, for his body tensed and his adam's apple bobbed harshly in his throat. His eyes flickered down to her lips only for a moment before he looked back up and cleared his throat.
"God, I'm tired." He straightened up suddenly, laughing dryly in a way that Ada assumed was supposed to reassure her. It didn't work. "I'm bloody knackered. Might have that day off you've been badgering me about."
Ada withdrew the hand that was still on his arm; she hadn't even realised she'd been touching him for so long.
Newt swiped a hand down his face, erasing that blank expression and smiling lightly down at her. "Where does this one go?" He held up a piece of the mapped paper, crumpled at the edges from where it had been clenched in his grip not a moment before. "Can't remember where I drew the sodding thing."
Ada opened her mouth and closed it again, suddenly feeling as if she were walking on eggshells that couldn't break lest the floor collapse beneath her.
"Don't just stand there like Minho when Nick wants help cleaning out the livestock," Newt laughed awkwardly, and god when was the last time things had been awkward between them? She couldn't quite remember. "I wanna get this bit mapped before tonight."
"You looking forward to tonight, then?" She asked after a while. "I know you missed the last bonfire." He hadn't been feeling great, so he had told her, and spent most of the night shut away in the very same building they stood in now.
"It's lot's of food and Gally's new secret recipe he won't shut up about." He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. "What's not to be excited about?"
Ada laughed, that hollow feeling still in her stomach. Tonight, she thought. I'll ask him about it tonight.
—
The drink burned its way down her throat as she lowered the jar, grinning wildly at Minho. He was blurrier around the edges than usual, his movements as he stumbled his way around the fire sluggish and borderline reckless considering how close they were to the open flame. The entire glade, green and magnificent, was considerably more hazy than she could ever remember it being.
Alby had, at one point, situated himself closer to them to stop them from falling into the bonfire. When the world had violently spun as Minho twirled her around the flames by the tips of her fingers, Alby had stepped forwards, grinning, and wrapped an arm around her waist to pull her away from the heat of the fire. He hadn't lingered, the heat of his fingers burning through her clothes, but that familiar feeling of horror didn't come. It was drowned instead by the feeling of giddiness she couldn't seem to shake and the tired buzz that thrummed through her bones.
She quite liked the feeling, she decided, and judging by the blissful expression on Minho and Gally's faces they did too.
Gally had made far more of his strange drink than she had anticipated, and had passed it around the eager gladers happy to watch chaos unfold as the effects took hold. Alby, three mason jars in and swaying in his place, grinned down at her as the amber liquid sloshed out of his jar.
"Adaaaa, Ads," He smiled down at her dopily, slurring her name as he slung an arm around Minho's shoulders. Minho looked as if he were one drink away from falling asleep standing up. "Go tell Newt to loosen up and have some of this stuff."
Ada processed about half of what he said, but the words 'Newt' and 'loosen up' had her looking towards where she knew he was sat. The world spun as she turned her head back to Alby. "Why?"
"Bastard doesn't like my drink." Gally said miserably, shooting a glare in Newt's direction that was only half diminished by the fact that he was leaning heavily against Minho's side. "Everybody liked my drink." He gestured to the rest of the glade, seemingly in similar states of disarray. "Stupid Newt and his stupid water."
Newt was, in fact, cradling a mason jar of water in his right hand. His left hand was tapping a strained beat against his leg, his blank stare fixed on the ground.
"Ads, Ads," Alby said excitedly, tapping her on the shoulder like an eager child, "you should go tell him to like Gally's drink."
She nodded seriously, immediately leaving her post by the fire and walking over to him, and watched as a slow smile grew across Newt's face when he spotted her. "Someone's been having a good night." Ada flopped down onto the grass next to him, huffing at the dull ache as her elbow collided with the log he was leaning against. His hand shot out to steady her. "Easy there."
"Gally told Alby that I should tell you that you should like Gally's drink." Ada nodded determinedly, copper hair spilling into her eyes, and Newt huffed out an amused laugh at the way she tried to bat the strands away with the same hand holding the mason jar. Amber liquid spilled out onto his shirt.
"That so?" He asked, deftly intercepting her arm and removing the jar from her clutches. "Think you've had enough of this stuff." He lifted the drink to his nose, recoiling when the strong smell hit him. He had smelt traces of it in the air all night, but the direct smell made his eyes water. It reminded him starkly of the alcohol in the med hut they used to clean wounds. "What's in this stuff anyway?"
"Gally says its top notch produce." Ada waggled her eyebrows and grinned, giggling at herself. Her head felt heavy, so she rested it on the log behind her, the odd angle only mildly uncomfortable.
"Think I need to have a word with Gally about cutting people off when they've had too much."
"You haven't had any." Ada frowned, nudging the jar with the back of her hand, trying to push it towards him. "You should try some, it's good."
"I'm okay, thanks." Newt chuckled, moving the half full jar further away from her.
Ada shrugged, her eyes suddenly feeling heavier than they had a second ago. Newt watched her, a strange expression on his face she couldn't quite decipher. The firelight made the shine to his hair and the specks in his eyes glow. She wanted to touch him, suddenly, an urge that shocked her. She had felt the warmth of his body before, but whereas then she had shied away from it, frightened, now she found herself wanting to bask in it's comfort.
"You're looking at me weirdly." Newt said after a moment, raising an eyebrow at her. Ada shrugged and slowly reached out a hand, tracing her finger around the red shoelace on his wrist. It was worn and tattered to the point where the vibrant red was barely recognisable, now a muddy brown colour. Newt followed her gaze with his heart pounding as he watched the digit move.
"Do you ever wonder who gave you this?" She asked after a moment, and it took Newt a second to remember how to speak as she shuffled closer.
Newt hesitated for a moment, staring down at the red band, thoughts warring against each other in his mind. The shoelace was his one link to the outside world, the one bit of comfort he couldn't bring himself to let go of. Their clothes and weapons were swapped and changed, he himself had changed since his entry into the maze, but the shoelace had remained wrapped around his wrist for the better part of a year. It wasn't a secret, but it felt like one, one he held closely to his chest and revelled in the small comfort it provided. The idea of sharing that piece of himself, that comfort, with anyone didn't sit right with him.
But this was Ada, and she was looking up at him with those wide eyes of hers, smiling dopily, and truly happy for the first time in a long time. And for a reason he didn't quite understand he wanted to tell her, wanted to share that part of himself he kept so closely guarded.
"It never mattered who gave it to me." Newt said softly, leaning closer to her. "It's such a small thing, so insignificant really. Maybe I was just switching the laces out in my shoes and there wasn't a bin nearby, or maybe someone important gave it to me before I lost them, I don't know, could be anything." Newt swallowed at the fixed expression on Ada's face, how although Gally's drink was clearly getting to her she was still listening to him intently. His chest felt warm and tight. "It never mattered, because it was still my one link to home. It makes me feel safe, comforted. I can't explain it."
"You don't have to." Ada said softly. "I get it. Well, I don't get it get it because I don't have anything from home, just me myself and I, but I get the whole comfort thing. It's important to have stuff like that otherwise you'll lose yourself." Ada stared at him for a second before withdrawing her hand, slowly placing it on the sleeve of his jacket. "Newt, I wanted to ask you-"
"Don't." Newt said simply, something deeply vulnerable breaking out across his face. "I know what you're going to ask, Ada, but please don't. I'm fine."
"You're not fine, Newt." Ada shook her head. "You're not fine. But that's okay, we'll fix it."
Newt smiled at the determined look on her face, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. "You can't fix this, Ada. So don't waste your time worrying about me, worry about getting us all out of here, okay?"
She didn't seem to hear him. "There has to be something that can make it better."
"You make it better." The words were out before he could stop them, but he didn't regret them, nor did he try to take them back. "That's enough for me."
Ada stared at him for a moment, mouth agape and eyes wide. "I don't understand."
Newt shrugged, staring down at the mason jar to avoid looking at her. "Having you by my side, fighting with me to get out of here... it means a lot to me. You mean a lot to me. Your friendship is everything to me. It makes living in this hell of a place a lot more bearable."
Ada was silent, and it frightened him. She hadn't been silent all night, but now she was just staring at him – he could feel the weight of her gaze on the side of his face. Slowly, so slowly he was sure he was dreaming, she lifted her hand and placed it gently on his cheek. Her fingers twitched at the contact, but the firm press of her palm on his cheek, the warmth it brought him, had his chest aching so badly he fought the urge to press his hand against it.
"Ada-"
"You'll be okay, Newt. We're gonna get out of here, and we're gonna go home. I promise."
Newt couldn't reply, not with their faces so close. He could barely think through the fog in his mind as he studied the freckles on her nose and watched the firelight dance in her eyes. He couldn't resist touching her, even though every fibre of his being was telling him not to, that it would spook her, make her pull away, and lord knows that was the last thing he wanted. His hand found her waist, fingers toying with the edge of her shirt. "Don't promise me that, Ada." His breath ghosted against her lips. "Not when you know you can't keep it."
Ada's eyes flitted down to his lips, so close to hers, and when she looked back up at him he could see desire and trepidation all rolled into one, burning into him until he was sure he would burst into flames.
"Ada, can I-"
Ada pressed her lips against his, and the words were lost.
The fire calmed, that blazing inferno that swallowed him whole receded until all that was left was silence as the noise of the glade faded away, reduced to ashes in the background. Her lips against his, soft and gentle, healed his wounds better than any bandage had ever managed to. His fingers, tangled in her shirt, flexed before moving upwards and winding their way into her hair, holding her so gently, as if one wrong move and she would shatter beneath his touch.
Ada sighed against his lips, and the sound had him pulling away just enough to breathe and rest his forehead against hers, one hand buried in her hair and the other hovering just over her waist. Ada shuddered, eyes still closed, and he kissed her again, lips pressing against hers hard enough for her to gasp into his mouth.
He tasted the alcohol on her lips, heavy and all consuming.
Ada pulled away, slowly, and it took Newt a second to realise she was trembling all over, her body shaking slightly. Her eyes were still closed, so he couldn't get a handle on her expression, couldn't quite make it out as she leant her forehead against his, their noses brushing. The hand in her hair moved away from her head, settling instead on her waist. The second he touched her there, Ada seemed to recoil into herself, her hands falling away from his face, and it was like someone threw ice cold water over Newt.
He pulled away from her entirely, ignoring the confused frown that worked its way onto Ada's face as she watched him go, his expression shuttering. "Newt, what-"
"You're drunk." He said simply, turning away from her, guilt rising like a storm inside him.
"I'm not-"
"That shouldn't have happened."
That light and floaty feeling vanished, and cold rose up inside her. It made her shiver as she leant back against the log, severing contact from him entirely. The emotional distance felt more restricting than any physical space they put between them. The comfort of his touch still lingered on her skin, but despite the warmth she felt from it her body still trembled and shied away from him, betraying her with an impulse reaction she couldn't get rid of.
"Oh." Ada said, looking away. "Right, yeah." Her cheeks flushed with embarrassment as she picked up the jar of liquid and took a hefty sip.
Newt flinched, looking as if he wanted to stop her, but he didn't. "I'm gonna go get you some water." He got to his feet hastily, avoiding her gaze as much as possible. As he passed her, Ada's hand shot up and caught at his sleeve.
"Newt, I'm sor-"
"Don't be." He smiled tightly down at her, but his eyes were gentle. "It was a mistake, just the heat of the moment. Got carried away, it happens."
"Right." She nodded, and the agreement broke something inside him. He walked away, shaking his head, leaving Ada sitting against the rock, cradling the jar full of Gally's recipe close to her chest and feeling like the biggest fool in the world.
—
"What did you do?" Alby asked, looking extremely judgemental for someone who had just thrown up in a bush. Newt was trying not to judge him too harshly as he filled up a jar with water and watched the older boy lean heavily against the stove. He checked quickly to make sure it wasn't on, lest Alby suddenly go up in flames.
"You should have one of these as well." Newt shoved the jar into Alby's hand and nodded down at it.
"Answer the question, Newt." When Newt didn't reply, Alby shook his head. "I'll answer it for you then, because I have eyes, and so does the rest of the glade, and the world may be spinning right now but I'm pretty sure I saw you and Ada getting all up close and personal by the fire. Uness Minho and the tree he was leaning against really hit it off while I've been gone."
"It's a nice tree." Newt said simply.
"Damnit, Newt, what did I tell you about Ada?" Alby asked angrily, slamming the jar down onto the counter with a little too much force. "I told you she doesn't like to be touched and the first thing you do is shove your goddamn tongue down her throat-"
"That's not what happened." Newt said just as angrily, levelling Alby with a glare. "You know damn well that's not what happened. And you don't need to berate me for it, okay? I know. I'm a horrible person. I know she doesn't like to be touched and yet I kissed her anyway. She probably hates me."
"Good." Alby grumbled, snatching up the jar and taking a large gulp of water. "Making out with the one goddamn person I told you not to. Couldn't have picked anyone else, oh no, had to be her."
Newt didn't bother dignifying that with a response, instead rolling his eyes as he reached for a second jar to fill and take back to Ada. "I'm a bloody idiot."
"Agreed."
"I don't even know why I kissed her." Newt muttered, running a hand through his hair.
"Because you have feelings for her." Alby rolled his eyes, as if it were obvious.
Newt nearly dropped the jar.
"Excuse me?"
"You have feelings for her." Alby rolled his eyes again, and clearly the feeling made him nauseous as he sank back against the sinks and clutched his stomach.
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Then what's that feeling in your chest?"
"Heartburn."
"Newt..."
"It's not possible."
"And why not?" Alby shrugged. "Seems pretty possible to me. Probable, in fact. Undoubtable, really."
"Why am I even having this discussion with you, you're drunk."
"But no less wise." Alby said solemnly. The look on his face suggested that this supposed wisdom was a great burden to bear indeed.
"I'm not — I don't have — stop smirking like that, I don't have feelings for her."
"Then why did you kiss her?"
"She kissed me." Newt said angrily.
"Yes, and I can tell that it was so one sided." Alby looked at him far too smugly for Newt's comfort.
"Oh piss off and go to bed." Newt said eventually, turning back towards the glade, where he spotted at least four people in various stages of unconsciousness.
Including, he realised with a strange tug in his chest, Ada. Her head was still tilted back onto the log, but he could tell by the way her eyes were closed and her breathing was steady that she had fallen asleep waiting for him to come back. Her right hand was slack, the jar tipped over, spilling the remnants of the amber liquid onto the grass.
"Awh." Alby smiled, staring over at Ada like she was the most precious thing on this earth. "It's late." He squinted up at the black sky. "I think. You go get her to bed, I'll round up the rest of the gladers. And get Minho away from that tree."
Newt nodded, carefully making his way over to her, dodging the builders where they gathered round the benches. When he reached her, he simply stared down at her for a moment, not sure how to proceed. Half of him wanted to scoop her into his arms and carry her to her hammock, but the bigger part of him, the part that still felt disgusted at himself for touching her when she was clearly terrified of human contact, told him that was an awful idea.
Slowly, Newt knelt down into a crouch and prodded Ada's shoulder with his finger. "Ada." He whispered, ignoring the commotion in the background as Alby tried to shepherd thirty drunken teenagers to their beds. "Ada, love, you gotta wake up."
Her eyes opened with a disgruntled groan, glaring up at him. "Five more minutes."
"You can have a whole eight hours worth of minutes, but we gotta get you to your bunk first." Newt said softly.
Ada paused, as if considering it, but eventually nodded and clambered unsteadily to her feet. Newt's hands shot out, hovering over her waist and arms, ready to catch her if she stumbled. "You got it?"
"Yeah."
When they reached the Homestead, exhaustion was clear on Ada's face, weighing her down like a ton of bricks. Newt led her to her hammock and chuckled when she fell face first into it, sighing in relief at the softness of her pillow. "Boots." He tapped the offending footwear, but when Ada didn't move to take them off he huffed out an amused laugh and gently grabbed her ankle, sliding the shoes off her feet and placing them gently next to the hammock.
Slowly, he picked up the blanket and laid it over her, making sure her shoulders were covered so she wouldn't get cold during the night. "Goodnight, Ada."
"Newt," Ada's voice stopped him before he could walk away, and when he turned back to face her she was looking at him so openly it took his breath away. "This doesn't change anything... right?"
"'Course not." Newt smiled. "Get some sleep, gotta be up bright and early for section five."
"Yay," Ada grumbled, already half asleep. "G'night Newt."
"Night." Newt smiled as he walked away, and as he climbed into his own hammock he wondered if there was some truth to Alby's words after all. The darkness that seemed to be growing inside him thawed slightly, slithers of light creeping through the cracks.
Perhaps, he thought, there was hope for life in the glade yet.
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