Chapter 28: Triggered
April

"Triggers are like little psychic explosions that crash through avoidance and bring the dissociated, avoided trauma suddenly, unexpectedly, back into consciousness."
― Carolyn Spring

"Yes I do and I told you I'd be getting home late" she replied and frowned not liking his tone towards her. He sounded as if he was chastising her and she didn't know how she felt about that. All she knew was that she wasn't feeling it. She was ready to walk out their bedroom door and walk back in hoping that with a quick rewind she would get a better outcome.

"Yea you did but I wasn't expecting you to walk through the door at 3am either" he quipped.

April paused. "Skrrrt rewind let's have a do over because I'm not liking where this is headed nor am I liking your tone" April said and folded her arms across her chest trying to see what the big deal was when they had been in contact all day and all night. She had literally been checking on him and the kids throughout the day.

"You've been gone since damn near 3 this afternoon and its 3am right now. I'm glad you had a girls day out you deserved it but come on ma 3am. Lil Butt thought she was gonna see you and Triple B was looking around for you. Here I'm thinking 12 maybe 1 but not no 3"

"Wayment are you being serious right now or looking for another excuse to put me in the wheelchair because I promise you all you have to do is ask or just make it happen" she asked before she jumped to conclusions because if this could be avoided she'd let it be. It wasn't that serious. She'd happily take the punishment. Shit she low key wanted it.

Dave kept his eyes on her still mugging her. "I'm not with the fucks. I'm dead ass" he replied with a straight face. Oh so he was serious.

April balled her fist getting pissed off because clearly he forgot who he was talking to. "You know what I'm not bout to argue with you it's not worth it" she said as calm as she could in the moment and walked off as she literally bit down on her tongue trying her very best not to say some bullshit that she'd quickly regret. She had been working too damn hard at not coming at him the wrong way and verbally attacking him and here he was trying her knowing damn well she was too damn lethal with her tongue. She could send him a bullet with her tongue alone but this wasn't a shots fired type of situation. Well she was hoping that it wouldn't lead to that. She didn't want to argue with him. April just wanted to shower, hop in bed, cuddle him, and if possible get a round popping. The girls were sleep and Charlie had a few hours before she woke for a feeding and a change so they had the time.

"I'm not done talking to you" he said as he got up from the bed and followed behind her to her closet. He was on her heels.

"Well I'm done talking you" she said not even looking at him as she slipped out of her clothing. This is not what she thought she'd be coming home to.

"Yo you wildin right now" Dave barked and still his mug never left his face. Yet to April he was the one wilding. She couldn't understand why he was so mad.

April sighed. They argued like many couples did but this shit right here wasn't it. He had her feeling like she was a damn child who had missed curfew and the streetlights came on before she could make it through the front door or a woman who was always out and about in the streets partying and doing God knows what. He made her feel like her children and their home came last when she was the complete opposite. These days she had no time to herself because she spent it all on her children, Dave, their family, and taking care of home. So her world literally revolved around them. Shit she could barely even work from home when she needed to.

"Sorry for coming home late" she apologized and brushed past him heading for the bathroom hoping that by apologizing and being the bigger person it would end their argument before it blew up even more.

"I don't want to hear that shit. Then you tip toeing around the house like ya creeping around and shit" Dave kept at it causing her to stop in her tracks. He just wouldn't leave her be and get off her case and the more he talked the harder she bit down on her tongue. Who the fuck was he talking to right now because April just knew it couldn't be her.

April laughed and damn near cackled which only made it worse. "You must really think I'm Agnes so I'm a need you to go back to bed, lay ya big mad ass down, go to sleep, wake up, and think bout what comes out ya mouth next" she said furious that he was really making this into a big deal and for him to even utter the word creeping had her all the way pissed the fuck off. Her and creeping didn't belong in the same sentence.

"Did I say that" he shot back glaring at her with an attitude. She had only saw him like this once and that was when she dropped the bomb on him that she was pregnant and Chris was her baby father.

"You didn't have to. I don't know what ya thinking bout or what's going on in ya head but ya obviously not thinking clearly. I'm not Agnes! So excuse me for trying not to wake you up because I thought you were sleep. You're coming at me like I was outside fuckin around with another nigga like I haven't been in contact with you throughout the day and night. Mind you we share locations so if you wanted to pull up I'd a been right there to greet you but ok I'm in the wrong. I don't want to argue with you so like I said sorry for coming home later than expected. I didn't think it would be an issue" she said and walked off as tears threatened to spill out of her eyes. If he felt a way or had something to do all he had to do was say so and she'd a cut her night short but he never said anything. He just told her to have fun all for it to be tossed back in her face.

"I didn't say you were Agnes. You just had me waiting up for you like you were gonna come home at a decent time. Its 3am" he kept stressing the time.

"Ok AND...I've been doing the same thing for you since we've been together but you don't see me complaining and questioning what time you come in or go out" she spat back as she stood in front of the bathroom door. "You know what David leave me the hell alone ya insecurities are showing" she said trying to dead the argument because she was seeing a side of him that she wasn't here for and if he kept at it she was going to verbally attack him. So she had to leave him be before things got out of control.

"MAN FUCK THIS SHIT" Dave shouted and stormed off like it wasn't his fault that they were going back and forth.

April walked inside of the bathroom, closed, and locked the door behind her. She turned on the shower, stripped out of her panty and bra set, hopped inside, and tried her best not to cry. She hated arguing with Dave. She honestly didn't think she had done anything wrong but according to Dave she had fucked up. She knew it was his insecurities finally peeking through and it showed just how much Millie had really fucked him up. It was cool when they were out together late night till the wee hours of the morning but when she wasn't under his arms it was a problem or at least now it was a problem. Mind you she took a whole ass mini trip to LA to talk to Nia and he hadn't been upset in the least so why now. Let alone this had been her first time out in God knows how long so she couldn't understand why he was trying to come for her as if she did this on a regular. April quietly showered trying to stay out of her head, hopped out, took a deep breath, grabbed her towel, dried off, and walked out to see Dave sitting on the couch smoking still with a mug on his face big mad and fuming.

"Must be nice" she thought to herself and rolled her eyes as she made her way to the dresser then grabbed her cocoa and shea butter mixture and put on her body butter. She could care less if he saw her roll her eyes because tonight wasn't the night to try and clock her. Once she was done she went back to the dresser, opened her draw, and grabbed a set of fresh pajamas, tossed her towel on the bed, slipped into her pajamas, then put on her slippers and headed for the bedroom door.

"Where you going" Dave asked with smoke still in his mouth not even looking at her. He just stared ahead looking at nothing in particular.

"To a room that doesn't have you in it" she replied as she opened the door and walked out of the bedroom before he could say anything else to her. She walked right down the hall to Kairi's room and hopped in bed beside her and sighed. She didn't feel like sleeping alone but she couldn't be bothered with Dave right now. Dave had her feeling a way and right now her feelings were hurt. The shit had her questioning what else was she going to have to put up with because of Millie's fuck ups and what else did he have on his mind. April knew this shit was far from being over but right now she couldn't deal with it or him. She just hoped by the time Dave woke up that he would have a clear head and come to her like the man she fell in love with because right now this wasn't him. She would've never thought that this would be a problem. If she did she would've came straight home. They didn't have issues like this but tonight triggered something in Dave that she never saw coming. Papi was never insecure when it came to her. She never gave him a reason to be insecure.

"Momma" Kairi mumbled sleepily.

"Shh go back to sleep Love Bug" April said and kissed her forehead as Kairi cuddled into her sighing while April wrapped her arm around her small body. April stared into the darkness waiting for sleep to kick in because she refused to lay there and cry over something a nigga did again even if that dude was Dave. "Never go to bed mad at each other" April thought to herself and smacked her lips. "Guess it's a first time for everything" she thought.

*******

A Few Hours Later

April woke up the next morning like clockwork well actually a few hours later. She didn't need an alarm her body just knew what time it was. By now her body was programmed with all the things she did and needed to do on a daily. Right now it was 6:30am meaning it was time to feed and change Charlie. She only had but a few hours of sleep but like she said last night momma duties was never done and somebody had to do it. Carefully removing Kairi's arm from her chest and leg from her stomach she eased out of bed trying her best not to wake her. April yawned and did a quick stretch then quietly made her way out of the room only to stop dead in her tracks at the door.

"This nigga" she thought and rolled her eyes as she looked down to see Dave's big ass camped out in front of Kairi's bedroom door with his pillow and their bedspread sleep. "Punk ass can't even sleep without me" she thought and snickered in her head. She had every right to leave his ass there she was still mad. Yet she knew she couldn't. April stepped over him and closed Kairi's door behind her. "Papi get up" she said and nudged him with her foot making him stir in his sleep. "Go get in the bed" she said as she looked down at him wondering what convinced his big ass to camp out in front of Kairi's door to begin with. She knew that just because he was mad at her didn't change the fact that he still wanted to be near her and that shit low key ate him up to see her walk out on his ass. But she never thought he would actually sleep in the hallway just to be next to her.

"Mhmm" he sleepily mumbled.

"Uh huh" she said and walked off and went to Charlie's bedroom to see her woke and waiting for her which instantly brought a smile to her face. "Good morning momma's chocolate baby" April said and cooed as she looked down at Charlie who had her arms up and ready with a huge smile on her face. She picked her up and took her out of the crib smiling right back at her then went and took a seat in her rocking chair. She got herself situated, Charlie latched on, and April slowly rocked back and forth with her eyes locked on Charlie. She knew Charlie knew what was wrong with Dave. Just like April knew that Dave told Charlie all the tea. Too bad Charlie couldn't talk.

All April could do was think about the argument she had with Dave only a few hours ago and what had triggered him to the point he felt like she was in the wrong and how did moving quietly because she wasn't trying to wake him made him think that she was creeping around. She thought that they didn't have those types of issues but clearly she was wrong. Trust and loyalty is something they didn't play with. Their exes lacked those qualities in their last relationships so there was no way in hell that they would go through any of that shit during this one but Dave was definitely in his feelings. April knew it had to be more than her just coming home late and she was going to get to the bottom of it. She had to because this wasn't what she had signed up for. She finished feeding Charlie, wiped off her mouth and her chubby neck, burped her, and just sat there rocking her for a little while longer watching her little eyes flutter as sleep crept back in. April carefully got up from the rocking chair then went to her changing table and changed Charlie before kissing her forehead and placing her back inside her crib. Charlie was fed, changed, and knocked the fuck out with a full belly. April turned off the lights letting the nightlight shine and made her way out of her bedroom and started making her way back to Kairi's bedroom.

"Ma, come to bed" Dave said making her look over her shoulder towards their bedroom. He had gotten off of the floor like she told him to.

"I'm good" she turned back around and kept walking.

"Ma, please come to bed" he said damn near pleading.

"I'll see you when I wake up" she said and made her way to Kairi's bedroom then walked inside and carefully hopped back in bed. Kairi made her way right back to her and cuddled into her as if she had never left. She had been holding on to her tightly throughout the morning as if she was going to leave. April smiled, wrapped her arm around her, and closed her eyes. She would've gone back to her and Dave's bedroom when Dave asked her to but she was still in her feelings. She wasn't off him and between her pettiness and the stubborn bull that she was she just couldn't give in this time around. This wasn't the usual jealous Dave in his feelings type of thing. This right here was serious.

Meanwhile...

Dave tossed and turned in the bed knowing that sleep wasn't going to be easy but it was nobody's fault but his. He finally settled on lying on his back placing his hands behind his head and stared at the ceiling as the sun rose and peeked through slits of their vertical blinds. He knew he had come at April wrong but he was in his feelings and he was still in his feelings. But still even with being in his feelings he still wanted and needed April in bed and by his side. He didn't give a fuck if she wasn't in his arms or talking to him for that matter. He didn't like when they argued and he damn sure didn't like going to bed alone. Dave knew that shit wouldn't be right until they talked and right now they really needed to talk. He just knew that when April had come home that he was going to get another round popping and now they were both sleeping in different bedrooms pissed at each other. This was a first for them. They never purposely went to bed in separate rooms and when they did argue they dead that shit before their heads hit the pillow but tonight was different. Let alone this isn't how he wanted to kick off their anniversary weekend.

Their one year anniversary was in two days and this is the day where he planned on surprising April with a quick mini trip and it was already starting off as a bust. This was definitely not the way the day was supposed to start. Dave didn't know when he had fallen asleep but here it was damn near 10 o'clock in the morning. Kairi hadn't even burst into their bedroom waking him up like she normally did. But he knew since April was home and what had happened yesterday that she was going to be stuck to April like glue today. That alone had Dave pissed the fuck off it wasn't the fact that she would be stuck to April because his Lil Butt was always up under her momma but the fact that she sort of had a bad night last night had him fuming.

Dave yawned, stretched, hopped out of bed, and made his way to the bathroom to relieve himself. He did his usual morning routine and once he was done washing his hands, brushing his teeth, and washing his face he made his way out the bathroom and back into the bedroom. He slipped on a pair of his slides, walked out of the bedroom, and made his way down the hall, down the stairs, and to the kitchen to see April cooking breakfast and the girls sitting at the kitchen table. His littlest baby was now able to sit up on her own so she was in her highchair. He knew April felt him enter the kitchen yet she didn't bother to look his way. She kept doing what she was doing and paid him no mind.

"Daddy" Kairi said excitedly once she saw him which made him smile. He was happy to see her cheery and smiling again after what had happened last night.

"Good morning Lil Butt" he said with the same excitement and kissed her forehead. "Good morning Pop's baby" he said and kissed Charlie's forehead making her smile and make spit bubbles as she happily moved her arms about in the air.

"Daddy mommas home" Kairi said smiling. She had missed her something terrible last night.

"I see" he said smiling back at her and made his way over to April and stood behind her like he normally did and wrapped his arms around her waist. He sighed feeling his home in his arms but shit wasn't right between them. They could both feel it and they both hated the feeling. "Good morning ma"

April sighed. "Good morning Papi" she said and looked over her shoulder with her lips poked out for a kiss which made him feel a little shittier because when she had come home they hadn't shared a kiss or even an I love you. That's not what they did and he didn't want to make it a habit for them to do when things wasn't going good.

Dave knew she really didn't want to be bothered with him but she wasn't going to have their girls thinking that something was wrong so she was sticking to the script. Dave kissed her and sighed again then let her go and let her be then made his way to the table and took a seat. They went about their morning routine like they normally did but Dave knew April was still saving face for the girls. She was big on keeping their problems away from the kids. They were kids and didn't need to be in the mix of adult problems And situations. He knew he was going to have to talk to her and soon because he had shit planned for their anniversary. So the sooner he talked to her the better. As soon as nap time hit Dave was on it.

"Ma we need to talk" he spoke up as he looked over at April who was on her side of the bed looking at the girls in awe while the girls were napping in between them. Kairi didn't want to nap in her room so they let her and Charlie sleep in their bedroom so they could nap as a family. It was something they often did especially with Dave coming and going for tour.

"Yea we do" she said as she got out of bed and started placing pillows around Charlie then walked out of the room with the baby monitor in her hand and Dave following right behind her. They walked down the hall to their office in silence. April opened the door, walked inside, and made her way to the shared couch they had in there. Dave followed suit closing the door behind them and grabbed his desk chair and rolled it in front of April and took a seat. He wanted no he needed to be face to face to her. "Sooooo" April dragged looking at him waiting for him to open his mouth and speak up.

Dave wiped his hands over his face and sighed. "Sorry bout this morning"

"Uh huh now what's the real issue because the shit you said to me couldn't have been directed towards me" she said and asked. She needed him to get to the point and not pussy foot around it. It was bad enough that the shit had been on her mind all morning.

Dave leaned forward and kept his eyes on her. "I wasn't feeling you coming in the house at 3am when you've been out practically the whole day" he said just as he did a few hours earlier. The event had really struck a nerve.

"I honestly didn't think that it would be an issue especially when I had let you know that I was going to be later than expected. Yes we lost track of time but I kept you in the loop. It wasn't like I was out doing fuck shit. I was out with my sisters literally all day"

"Yea you did but you were gone since 3 something that afternoon. That's a whole twelve hours" he looked at her and frowned. She wasn't getting it.

April looked at him then rubbed her hands over face frustrated then rubbed her temples. "Dave cut the shit! What's the real reason why ya mad because I'm not buying that shit? If I was always out in the streets hanging out with my girls and not taking care of our kids, you, and home then I could understand why ya mad but that was LITERALLY the first time I've been out like that in over a damn year. These days I don't have much time to myself so the one day I do go out it's a problem" she said trying not get pissed all over again or raise her voice. She was mad they were even having this conversation.

"What aren't you understanding you left around 3 in the afternoon and came back in at 3 in the fuckin morning and then you was creeping around the room on some sneaky shit" he said with his brows furrowed with bass in his voice. This isn't what he wanted to do. He wanted to have a civilized conversation but it wasn't working. He was sort of stuck in a crossroad because he wasn't expressing himself fully like he normally did when they talked.

"So when you do it, it's not the same" she shot back getting heated.

"When have I done that shit" he asked. "The only time I'm out like that is when I'm working and you know that shit"

April looked at him and cocked her head to the side. "If you want to talk bout what time people are coming and going in the house then let's talk bout it. There have been plenty of times where you go to work and you're doing a show and they want you to stay for a certain time and you stay out way past that time. You can have a show at 9 be scheduled for an extra two hours and next thing I know ya coming in at 3 or 4 in the morning because you decided to stay for the fuckin party. I never say shit to you. I let you be. I don't complain because it doesn't bother me" she said but she wasn't finished. "I'm always home making sure shit is good while you're out there at whatever time of night. I don't bark at you when you come in the house. But I go out one damn day ONE day and you flip the script. Even when you're chilling with ya boys you stay out to whenever you feel the need to come home but I can't"

"That's work ma. Sure I may stay later and sometimes I do be enjoying the party but I'm out here networking too and when I'm done I come straight home to you. Just like when I'm chilling with the bros you know how those nights go" he said and proved her point while doing so but he wasn't grasping it. Sure he spent time with her and the kids but when he was out and about there was no telling when he'd come home depending on what's was going on and his mood.

April put her head down as her left leg began to bounce up and down. She was getting annoyed because he knew damn well it was more to the story. He was trying to downplay it, walk over it, and toss something so simple as her going out in her face. Whatever type of picture he was trying to paint she just couldn't see it. It wasn't making any sense and she knew that he knew it wasn't making sense. "David do you hear ya self? I came straight home to you too. I was the last person to get dropped off that's why I came home later. What the fuck did you think I was out there doing? I went shopping. I went to the spa. I went back to my old spot, went out to eat, and when we were done we booked a room and chilled the rest of the night. I AM NOT MILLIE" she said and raised her voice. She knew he didn't want to bring Millie up but that had to be his issue because she hadn't done anything wrong.

"Mind you if I was going to do some fuck shit I wouldn't dare take my sisters along to do no dirt. Let alone those girls would literally whoop my ass if I did some silly shit to fuck up what me and you have and break up our home" April said as her eyes watered. They were angry tears. He was really pushing it and drawing up some bullshit narrative.

"FUCK MILLIE" he shouted and abruptly stood up from his chair looking at her. "She fucked me and my damn baby over" he said and started pacing the floor.

"Bingo" April said hitting the nail right on the head. She knew that shit wasn't about her. "That she did but I thought we were past that. This new shit you pulled doesn't have shit to do with me. We don't have trust or loyalty issues and you know that. Just like you know me coming in at 3am wasn't a big deal. So what's really going on" she said and continued to press him while watching him pace the floor. She knew it was Millie. At this point when wasn't it? By the way he was acting and the shit that was coming out of his mouth she knew what it was. She just needed him to speak up and speak his mind.

"I don't mind you going out ma. You needed a day to yourself. I know how hard you work and I know how hard you go for me and the girls" he said and sighed. He was tired of this shit. He hated how he felt and what was constantly being brought into their relationship. "You being gone all day triggered Kairi" he said and sat back down. "She saw you that morning before school and y'all spent time together after school like y'all always do and when you left she was sleep. She was good for a few hours up until bed time. She kept asking where were you and when were you coming home. I told her you were out with the girls and she was ok and asked if she could stay up later" Dave said. He was mad that they were even having this conversation himself. He was upset that his baby was still going through the motions of some shit Millie had done. The shit pained his heart. It was never about April and what time she had come home.

He continued. April sat there and listened knowing he had a lot on his chest and he needed to get it out but she was low key fuming that her child was feeling a way. "I let her stay up. I guess she figured she would be up when you got home but as time passed Lil Butt sort of started getting antsy and panicky. She had a full blown fit crying and shit. Ma she's never done that shit before" he said saddened. If he hadn't been busy trying to calm her down he'd a been panicking right along with her. It scared him shitless and the fact that he was home by himself when it happened didn't make it any better.

"Papi why didn't you call me" April questioned concerned. She didn't like what she was hearing and she knew Dave was most likely panicking inside when it happened. She knew she was going to have to spend some time with Kairi though because she didn't want her to think for a second that she was going anywhere without her. Yet here they were again. Even with Millie being locked up in a cell states away she was still causing problems for them. At this point April didn't know when the shit would ever stop. She was getting tired of the shit and cleaning up Millie's messes. It was like no matter what Millie was always going to be lurking even if she wasn't physically there. She was mentally there in both Dave and Kairi's minds and no matter how much or how hard April worked to make sure that both he and Kairi would be good shit still spilt out of the cracks.

"I knew that if I called you and you would've talked to her that you would've ended your night and came home. Ma if nobody deserves a night out you do and I know that. You do a lot. You're always on momma duty, wife mode, sister duty, and daughter duty. I know with me gone you're doing the job of two parents so I know how much you needed that night. I just wish you would've come home earlier so she would've seen you before she went to sleep. She thought you pulled an Agnes and left" he admitted and slumped back into his seat. He had wanted to call April so bad when it had gone down but he just didn't want to ruin her night. He knew how much she had been looking forward to the outing and he just couldn't take that from her. She didn't ask for much didn't go out or take time to herself so he wanted her to have and enjoy her day.

"David that's my child" she exclaimed with her hand hitting her chest. "I will always answer when she calls. I will always be there when she needs me. I don't care bout all of that other shit my children come first. You know they're a priority. Thank you for giving me the day but next time if she's needs me and she's panicking call me. I'm not Agnes. I don't come and go or pick and choose when and when not to be there for my child" April said feeling a way. Her kids were number one on her list of priorities. They always came first. She didn't care what she was doing she would've been there. If her night had to be shortened then so be it. She'd drop whatever she was doing for them every time.

"I know ma and I will" he said and sighed then slumped further into his chair. He sound so hurt and looked so defeated. That shit had hurt his heart to see Kairi like that. She had never done that with Millie. She was use to her coming and going but with April it hit different. April never disappeared she was always there. Besides going to see Nia April had been with Kairi every damn day since Dave had started his tour so she was used to seeing her on the daily all-day every day. Even before Dave started tour April was always there. Since day one when they were introduced to each other April had been there. Even the week Dave took to himself after April told him she was pregnant she was still there every time Kairi called to speak to her. She was always there and had no intentions on leaving.

April smacked her forehead a little disappointed in herself. "I should've called instead of just texting you. I wonder what she was thinking. I've been gone before and she's never panicked"

"Don't beat ya self up ma I'm already beating myself up enough for the both of us. The only difference is you called her while you were gone. She got to speak to you" Dave said. He didn't want her to think that it was her fault for what had happened to Kairi. If he had to sum it all up it would be classified as abandonment issues due to Millie coming and going.

April sighed and made a mental note to always call home which she already did but the one time she hadn't this happens. "She fucked my baby up"

"Both of us" Dave mumbled.

"So I'm guessing I triggered you too" she asked looking into his eyes. That was never her intention to trigger either one of them. She didn't know it was going to happen and if she did she'd a done whatever she could to stop it.

He shamefully nodded his head. "I was up worried bout Lil Butt and just thinking bout shit I shouldn't have wasted my time thinking bout. When I was with Agnes she would be out all times of the night and when she would come home she would be creeping around the house early morning. She'd be sneaking inside and trying to act like she had been home for hours. When you came home I was already mad, shaken up, a lil scared, I had Lil Butt on my mind, and you came in the room on some tip toe shit. It just took me back to a place I never want to be again" he admitted. He was going through it last night but he couldn't bring himself to ruin April's night.

"Had I known that I'd a just came in the room and turned on the lights but I honestly was trying not to wake you. It was late and you know how we both feel bout the lights being turned on abruptly while we're sleep"

"I know that ma but I wasn't thinking clearly and I had a bunch of shit on my mind. In that moment all I seen was Agnes creeping in the house even when I knew that it was you"

April sighed and shook her head. "No matter how hard we try to get rid of her she always pops up even if it isn't physically. I'm fuckin tired of her" April said and placed her feet in the couch and pulled her knees to her chest. When would the Millie era be over and done with? Sadly she knew it wouldn't. Dave would eventually get over the shit she put him through but April knew as Kairi got older she would eventually wonder what happened to her and they'd have to fill her in on certain things.

"Tell me bout it" he said. Millie was a thorn in his damn side. He was tired of giving her space in his head rent free. He just hoped that would be Kairi's first and last time panicking like that. If not they were going to have to get her some help because he couldn't have her going through that. She was way to young to experiencing things like that.

"I'm hoping this is the first and last time Love Bug goes through that. If it continues which I hope it doesn't we might have to get her some professional help or at least talk to someone to see what we can do on our own to stop it. Honestly speaking and I'm not trying to be funny but maybe you should talk to someone too. Obviously whether you like to admit it or not Agnes has left y'all with invisible scars" April said looking over at Dave reading his mind as always.

She hoped she hadn't hurt his feelings but it was apparent that he was a little more damaged then he let on. She knew what Agnes had done to him wouldn't fade away overnight but she thought that things had gotten better since her and Dave pride themselves on being able to talk to one another. She figured he had spoken his peace when it came to Millie. But April also knew that some men were more emotional but liked to keep their hurt and pain to themselves. She knew that when it came to talking to professionals and mental health period that the black community liked to look pass it and act as if it didn't exist when it clearly did. Talking to professionals was for whites only but they were wrong. Talking to professionals helped and mental health issues were very much real and important. Shit even April had a therapist. Some things required professional help and sure her therapist was costly but it was worth it.

Dave nodded. He didn't feel a way. He knew she saw a therapist and it helped her so he couldn't see why it wouldn't help him but at the same time he didn't think he needed to see anyone. Sure Millie fucked him over but he didn't think that he couldn't handle it. As far as Kairi if she needed it he wouldn't hesitate to get her some help. "I'm hoping that's her first and last time too but if she needs help I'll do whatever I need to do to make sure she's good. As far as me I'm good at the moment. That's why I have you. You're my therapist" he said and it was true. With April he knew that he could talk to her about any and everything. He just hated the fact that sometimes Millie was what he needed to talk about.

April looked at him and smiled. "Well I'm here like always so if you need to vent I'm here" Of course she didn't want to keep talking about Millie with him but clearly it had to be done because some wounds didn't heal overnight.

"I know" he smiled back at her. "I just don't like talking bout her to you. We've passed that stage" he admitted. He didn't find it necessary to keep bringing her up even if she was the one who was causing him and their child pain.

"Forget bout her for the moment. Now I hate to ask you this especially since we're in the middle of planning our wedding but I need to know. David do you trust me? I mean 100% trust me" she said and asked. She needed to know because without trust they didn't have shit. Everything they had been through and going through would be for nothing until they worked on their trust. April knew that she trusted him with her whole heart but she needed to make sure he was on the same page as her. He never gave her the inkling that he didn't trust her but still she needed to make sure before they went any further.

Dave sat up straight and looked dead at her and into her eyes piercing her soul like he always did when he wanted to give her the facts. "Yes I trust you. I wholeheartedly trust you. You don't even have to question that. Trusting you comes easy. I don't doubt you for a second. If I didn't trust you we wouldn't be here right now. I wouldn't have asked you to be my woman and I damn sure wouldn't have asked you to be my wife" he confidently answered. That was something he'd never have to worry about with April. What had happened earlier had just been him in his feelings.

"Good because I trust you. I will always trust you unless you give me a reason not to. Papi I'm not Agnes and I will never be Agnes. Fucking up my home isn't my MO. I will always be there for Kairi and you no questions asked. Y'all got me. Y'all are stuck with me. Y'all are mines. I am yours. I'm not just marrying you I'm marrying my Love Bug. I'm solidifying my role as your wife and as her mother. I can't change what Agnes has done to y'all and put y'all through but what I can do is make sure that y'all never go through it again" April said and promised. She didn't care how many times she had to reassure him as well as Kairi that she was there for the both of them no matter what.

Dave looked at her and smiled from ear to ear. He didn't know how the hell he found April or even landed in the position he was in when it came to holding her heart in the palms of his hands. Whether it be fate, Allah working miracles, the powers that be, or whatever else he knew that she was the one not only for him but for their daughter as well. It was written and maybe it was time to make it official. Maybe it was time for April to sign her name on the dotted line and officially become Kairi's mother. Kairi called her momma, thought of her as her mother, Dave thought of April as her mother just as well as everyone in their family. She was on all of her emergency contact information any way. So it was only right.

"I love you ma"

"Duh I love me too" she said and laughed singing that sweet music in his ears bringing warmth to his body.

He mugged her for the one time. He just had to. She knew how he felt about the whole I love you thing and right now he really needed to hear those three words. "Ma"

"I love you too Papi BUT" she looked at him and raised her brow then pointed her index finger at him. "You got some ass to kiss sweetie" she said serious as hell. She wasn't about to let him off the hook that easily.

"And I plan on kissing both cheeks and French kissing those sweet lips" he said and licked his lips as he looked between her legs. "Real talk though ma from the bottom of my heart I'm sorry for coming at you the way that I did. I was dead wrong. I was in my feelings but that's no excuse. I never want you to feel like you've done anything wrong when you haven't or make you feel any way when you don't deserve to. Shit I didn't want to start our anniversary weekend off like this" he apologized. He truly was sorry he was just having a bad moment and took it out on the wrong person.

"Boy who you telling" she said and smacked her lips. She couldn't wait for this weekend. He had been telling her he had plans for them and she had been storing hella milk for Charlie so she definitely wanted in on whatever he had planned. He had promised her a good time. "I thought I was gonna come home and you'd be sleep then I could wake you up on my own" she said and licked her lips sort of drifting away in her thoughts. "But I accept your apology Papi. Just promise me that the next time something happens to Kairi that you call me right then and there and if you're in ya feelings just let me know so I can give you space to collect ya thoughts properly. Then come to me when ya done so we can work it out together" she said it and she meant it. Family came first and her children were above all.

Dave nodded. "I promise ma just remember I'm a work in progress"

"Understood" April nodded because she understood where he was coming from. She was a work in progress herself. "By the way how does ya back feel" April asked and laughed remembering how his big ass had camped out in the hallway on the floor in front of Kairi's bedroom.

Dave mugged the shit out of her. "Ya stubborn ass knows damn well we ain't supposed to go to bed mad at each other or in different beds. I fucked up I did but I still wanted you near" he admitted. "And my back is fine but I'm due for a back massage so you can add that on to my anniversary presents" he said smirking. He could use a good ole body massage from his woman.

April laughed. "Boy bye I'll think bout it but I ain't making you any promises and if I didn't leave the room last night we'd a most likely ended up in a screaming match. So the best thing for me to do was leave" she said and chuckled. As far as his body massage she wasn't going to say shit or tell him what she had planned for him for their anniversary.

"Just know we ain't doing that shit again" Dave said still mugging her.

"Uh huh" April said and shrugged. She had to admit that even though she enjoyed sleepover times with her Love Bug she did miss sleeping in Dave's arms last night but she wasn't going to tell him that.

"Speaking of our anniversary I need you to pack a suitcase. Ya gonna need some summer attire preferably summer dresses, swimsuits, and pull out one of those sets for me. Matter fact I'll pick that out and you can cover the rest" he said and rubbed his hands together. He had some plans for her and her body. He couldn't wait until they were in the sky so he could get that first round cracking and introduce her to the mile high club properly.

"Oops a what now" April said excitedly and clutched her chest wondering what exactly did he have planned for them and where were they going that she needed summer attire. "Let me find out we're bout to have some fun in the sun"

"Just have ya bags packed and be ready by 7 we got a flight to catch" he said. He couldn't wait to get her alone and have her to himself for a few days. They needed this especially after this blow up and him about to go back on tour. He had some making up to do and he planned on making it up in every way possible.

April dropped her head and sighed then looked back at him. "With Love Bug's situation do you think we should be leaving" she questioned concerned. She didn't want to leave her when she was already going through something traumatic.

"I thought bout that. I figure you could spend the day with her until it's time to leave. Both of our parents will be here to watch the girls so she should be good with them and you know they won't hesitate to call us if need be" he answered sure of himself. He knew that their parents would go above and beyond to make sure that Kairi was straight.

"Bet, well I guess I need to go raid my closet and make a quick girl's day for my babies" April said and got up from the couch.

"Bet, do that just let me know when you go look at that lingerie draw" he said smirking. That draw was loaded with some good shit.

"I gotcha and how many outfits do I need" she questioned with her brow raised.

"Ya not gonna need many outfits ma. I plan on never leaving the room" he said as a matter of fact.

"PAPI"

"Ok, ok" he raised his hands. "Four should be good and make sure one of them is dinner wear. I want to see you in something sexy"

"Yessss got it" she beamed then got quiet and just looked at him. "Oh yea and if you ever come at me like that again like you don't know who the fuck ya talking to or dealing with I'm a come for ya ass no CAP. You hurt my feelings and made me feel small. You made me feel like I was wrong for taking a day to myself knowing damn well that I don't have many days like that." she said as she got up from the couch and stood in front of him with her eyes trained on him letting him know exactly how she felt.

April continued. "Let alone that whole creeping shit that you kept throwing in my face knowing damn well I'm as loyal as they come. I would never creep around on you or anyone I'm dealing with. Never have and never will. If I need to creep around that means somethings wrong with our relationship and I didn't go through everything I did to finally get my happy ending only to have it tossed in the trash. Before I even think bout creeping I'm out and doing me. You won't have to worry bout me creeping. I'll be out here in these streets living my best life on my nigga shit" she said serious as hell. She wasn't here for none of the extra shit. Just like if her and Dave's relationship fell apart she wouldn't even worry herself about being in another relationship. She would be out here just like a dude fucking and ducking because she wouldn't have anymore love to give.

"I deserved that I do and I will make it up to you. But ya ass ain't going anywhere so watch ya mouth. You'll be living ya best life with me just like you're doing now on ya wifey shit" Dave said. It wasn't shit he could really say or do. He was lucky that was all she had said. "I'm proud of you though"

April scrunched her face puzzled.

Dave chuckled. "You didn't chew me up and spit me out verbally" he said because he knew for a fact that her mouth could get reckless as hell.

April chuckled. "Yea...yea...yea I'm glad you know that. I'm out of here though. I got some packing to do and a girl's day to plan" she said. She didn't even ask where they were going she was just excited that they were going on their first baecation. Let alone he told her she needed summer wear and they were catching a flight so yeah she didn't need to ask any questions. She was good on that. She was just ready to see what he had in store for them.

"Give me those lips first" he said and pulled her body closer to him.

April poked her lips out and kissed him but Dave didn't want just a kiss he wanted it all. He slid his hands down to her ass, cupped each cheek, and lightly bit down on her bottom lip.

"Mhmm" April moaned into his lips allowing him to slip in his tongue. Dave took over the kiss and kissed her passionately until her legs weakened and her body shuddered in his hands.

SMACK

Dave smacked her ass and gripped it again.

"Don't think I didn't see you roll ya eyes last night either" he spoke into her lips.

Triggered...

_________________________________
-Hey guys happy reading I hope y'all enjoyed. There will be a part 2 to this but it won't be anything pertaining to their baecation. It'll actually be someone else's POV.
-I know many of y'all thought that April was about to get that wheelchair action 😂 Maybe she will who knows. Then again they do have a lil trip coming up.
-Papi was mad, MAD. Do you think April was wrong for coming home late and how do you feel about her walking out on him 🤔 Had that ass sleeping on the hallway floor though 😂
-How do you feel about his explanation for coming at April the way he did? Does it excuse his behavior?
-Poor Love Bug though had to go through the motions. Agnes really did leave them with invisible scars 😔
-How do you feel about this having to do with something Agnes did 🤔. Would you be mad that Agnes was always around in some form whether it be physically, emotionally, or mentally 🤔
-Any, who sharing is caring so tell a friend to tell a friend. Don't forget to comment, vote, & add to your libraries 🥰
-If you are reading & not commenting no problem just make sure you color the ⭐️ please & thank you 🥰

🛑Mental health is no joke nor is it a walk in the park. I know blacks have a stigma for not wanting to talk about their issues let alone talk about them to a therapist but sometimes professional help is needed. There's nothing wrong with getting help. Just like you can talk to a stranger and talk about whatever is on your mind then you can talk to a therapist as well. Talking to a therapist does not mean you're looney so if you need help don't hesitate to get it. For those of you who are hesitant to get help look into getting a journal. Sometimes it's good to write down your thoughts and see them on paper. Any, who I'm out 😘