Tanga

Saina's

IT hadn't dawned in me and yet I had to make decisions. Birada left after calming me down. I really didn't want to be alone right now, but I guess I needed the time to think. Kailangan kong mag-isip kasi kailangan kong malaman kung ano bang susunod kong gagawin. It's only a matter of minutes, tatayo na kami sa harap ni Uncle Gab, I wondered what he would say if he find out about this. Hindi pwedeng hindi ko sasabihin sa kanya, and I guess, he already has a clue on this. Hindi naman niya paiimbestigahan si Papa basta – basta nang wala siyang ideya kung siya ba ang mananalo sa huli o hindi.

Ayoko talagang makialam sa mga ganito, kaya lang involved pala ang anak ko at hindi ko matanggap na makakayang gawin ni Papa iyon. I already know that he is guilty, that we're just really looking for evidences pero iyong nakita ko naman, hindi ko talaga matanggap. I stood up, too the paper and left my office. I need to talk to Gabriel Consunji now, bago pa man din mahuli ang lahat. I would want him to hear it from me. Ayokong mamaya niya pa malaman.

I went to the conference room, tulad ng inaasahan ay naroon nga siya. He was talking to one of the investigators, pero tumigil sila nang makita ako ni Uncle Gab. He smiled at me – the professional smile – tumango naman ako at lumapit sa kanya, umalis sa kinauupuan niya ang lalaking kausap ni Uncle Gab, ako naman ay naupo sa pinag-alisan ng investigator at saka huminga nang napakalalim bago ko inilapag sa harap ni Uncle Gab ang papel na nagpasira ng buong araw ko.

He took the paper, read it and then looked at me.

"How do you feel, Saina?" He asked. I noticed the concern in his voice. I sighed. I shook my head.

"Alam ko naman na po ang kaya niyang gawin pero hindi ko inaasahan na idadamay niya si Haniel dito, Uncle Gab. I'm sorry. Hindi ko po talaga inaasahan ito. I had always known that he's doing something, it's just that I didn't realize that he'd be doing it to his own grandson." Hinawakan ni Uncle Gabriel ang kamay ko.

"I will take it from here, Saina. If you want, you could go home now. I'd deal with your father." Nakatitig lang ako kay Uncle Gab at sa unang pagkakataon, gusto ko siyang tanungin kung anong balak niya kay Papa pero at the same time, I can't seem to find the words to say. Tumango na lang ako sa kanya, he smiled at me again.

"I'll tell my driver to take you home."

"No, it's okay. I can drive. Thank you, Uncle Gabriel."

"Don't mention it. Just know that whatever happens, you are safe. I don't want you to experience any hardships. Masasaktan ang apo ko. I'll take care of the two of you, Saina." Naniniwala naman ako sa kanya, I know he's going to take care of me and his grandson. Mabait si Uncle Gabriel, hindi nga lang talaga siya gugustuhing makagalit ng kahit na sino. I was about to leave when I saw him give the paper to one of his attorneys. I had to stop myself from leaving. I faced Uncle Gabriel again.

"Birada..." Nakataas ang kilay na tiningnan ako ni Uncle Gabriel. "He's the one who found out. Spare him..." Mabait si Uncle Gabriel, hindi ako mangingiming sabihin iyon, pero kapag nagagalit siya, lahat damay. He sighed.

"I cannot promise you anything, Saina."

"He... he cares about Haniel." Mahinang wika ko. Noon ko nakuha ang attention niya. Halatang naguluhan si Uncle Gab dahil kumunot na naman ang noo niya. I bit my lower lip. "Haniel and his son, Joshua are best friends, Uncle Gabriel. If he... he loses something, masasaktan ang anak niya, masasaktan din si Haniel, Uncle, please..." Hindi na nagsalita si Gabriel Consunji at sa tingin ko ay wala na rin naman akong magagawa. I left the conference room with a heavy heart. Ayoko nang masaksihan ang kung anuman ang mangyayari mamaya, I took my bag, and my keys and left the company.

I found myself driving to my other office. I need to unwind, and I can do that there. Rai's mouth will distract me enough. Naiiyak ako habang nagda-drive. When I got to the office, I couldn't help but sob louder and that caught Rai's attention. She was checking some products with the attendees but she stopped whatever she was doing to confront me.

"Girl, what happened?"

"It's my dad." Sabi ko na lang. Napatingin siya sa paligid and when she realized that some customers are looking at us, hinatak niya ako papunta sa second-floor para hindi kami pagkaguluhan. She sat me down my chair and let me cry. I haven't cried like this since I realized that I still love Uriel but I can't be with him because of the circumstances we have now. I bit my lower lip, trying to control the pain, but I just couldn't.

"What did he do? Jusko, Saina, kalmahin mo ang sarili mo! What happened? Try to tell me a little bit so I can understand it."

I tried to calm myself down. Rai called her EA to ask for a cup of tea. Hindi naman nagtagal ay dumating iyon at ibinigay niya sa akin. I tried to drink it, I guess it helped because I calmed down a bit. I took a deep breath and look at Ramona. She had this worried look in her face. I sighed again.

"Ginagamit ni Papa si Haniel sa mga kalokahan niya. There's a dollar account with 40 million under my son's name. I cannot believe that he did that to his own grandson. Hindi niya ba naisip na maaaring mapahamak ang anak ko? He should be protecting my boy, not putting him at risk. Why is he like that?" I sobbed hard. Rai hugged me tight. Hinayaan niya akong umiyak nang umiyak.

"All my life I did nothing but to obey him, and respect him, ngayon lang ako kumakawala kasi hindi na tama ang mga bagay na ito. Galit ako sa kanya, pero kahit kailan hindi ko naisip na magagawa niya iyon kay Haniel. He's supposed to love and protect him."

"Look, girl, I can't really explain things, but I guess our parents have their own topak. Mine has one too, hindi lang siguro sing lala ng sa Papa mo, and you're right for being hurt and all, but girl, you need to be strong. You've been doing that for a long time, right, be strong, may Haniel kang naghihintay sa'yo. As a mother, pwede kang manghina, pero kailangan mo ring maging malakas muli because Haniel will need you. I'm not a parent yet, but I have my pamangkins and all, I see the way my sister – in – laws treat my nieces and nephews and I adore the two, and you, Saina, you're strong."

"I don't think I can ever forgive my dad." I sobbed again.

"You can do that..." Rai said to me. "But at some point, you need to forgive too. You can forgive but that doesn't mean that you need to reconcile. Forgiveness is different with each situation. Just... right now, be strong, okay?"

Ramona embraced me again. I don't know anymore. I don't want to go back there anymore.

xxxx

Gerry's

IT'S done. It's all that I am, thinking while listening to Gabriel Consunji give orders to the investigators that afternoon after the meeting. I stayed but I only did that to look after Saina which disappointed me a bit because she's not here. Kitang - kita ko kung paano nawala ang yabang ni Mr. Buensuceso nang i-flash ng EA ni Mr. Consunji ang papeles na ibinigay ko kay Saina kanina. I never thought that it'll end up like this.

When I took the job, I know and I believed that I was doing the right thing. Sain's father showed me papers that supported his statement. Naniwala akong talagang pinaalis lamg siya sa kompanyang iyon dahil sa ganid na business partner at dahil naimpluwensyahan ng taong iyon ang sarili niyang anak. I actually felt bad for him. Nakita ko kasi kung gaano niya kamahal ang anak niya at kung gaano niya pinahahalagahan ang apo niya.

But it all changed when I started to get to know his daughter. Saina is 100 per cent different from what Mr. Buensuceso described her. She's not egotistic or cold, she's feisty – yes, but she has a heart and I saw how much love she is giving my own son and that was when I started to double think about the situation. I feel like he is not telling me everything. I am a lawyer, kahit na palagi akong ininsulto ng mga tao na mukha akong pera dahil sa line of work na mayroon ako, may sarili akong prinsipyo at ayokong madamay sa gulo ng dalawang pamilya, maliban doon, my mother is always telling me to trust my instinct and I did just that.

I watched as Saina's father lost everything he is fighting for, I watched as he was humiliated in front of the board members, wala na ang lahat ng yabang niya and he admitted about the things he did. Wala na, tapos na ito, mapapaalis siyang talaga and Saina would be the legal CEO of this company. I think she got what she wanted and more because of this.

Nang matapos ang meeting ay naglabasan na ang mga board members. Si Mr. Buensuceso ay in-escort-an ng mga bodyguards ni Mr. Consunji palabas ng building. Bagsak na bagsak ang braso niya pero wala naman siyang magagawa. It's like he lost everything. Naisip kong baka naapektuhan siya ng mga sinabi ni Saina, if my son acts like that to me, I'll lose all that I have, sa akin kasi, si Joshua ang sentro ng mundo ko. He will always be my top priority and that is also the reason why I resigned today. Masamang kaaaway ang isang Gabriel Consunsji, hindi basta pagbabanta ang binitiwan niya sa akin noong nagkita kami noong araw na iyon. I know he can do things and when he say I am going to lose, I know I will. I don't want to cross his path anymore. I'd rather lose this job than lose my license and my everything. I worked hard for what I have now and I won't throw it away fighting for a man that didn't have any decency in his body.

Nang isa – isa nang umaalis ang mga abogado ni Mr. Buesuceso ay tumayo na rin ako para umalis. I don't know what Gabriel Consunji's planning now, but I am so sure that it's something bad for the old man. Narinig kong hindi lang basta sa kompanya ang problema nilang dalawa. I have heard that Mr. Buesuceso had something to do with his child's disappearance. It will be bad.

"Mr. Birada." I heard Gabriel Consunji's cold voice. Napahinto ako sa paglakad palabas at hinarap ko siya. I was only eyeing him. Wala siyang kare-reaksyon. Nakatingin lang rin siya sa akin na para bang pinag – aaralan ako mula ulo hanggang paa. "Sit." Iminuwestra niya ang upuan malapit sa kanya. Napilitan akong sumunod. Hindi naman ako kinakabahan pero inisiip ko kung ano bang kailangan niya sa akin.

"You resigned this morning, I had been told."

"Yes."

"Why? I thought you're a great lawyer. Akala ko kaya mong ilaban ang kasong ito hanggang sa huli? I heard about your reputation in the courts and in the business field, why the sudden change of heart?"

Hindi ako agad nakasagot. Bakit nga ba ganoon kabilis magbago ang isipan ko? I didn't even flinch when I told myself that I'd be resigning today. At that moment, paulit – ulit nagpa-flash sa isipan ko ang pangalan ni Haniel sa papel na iyon and also I kept thinking that an innocent child doesn't deserve that. A boy should be treated in a nice way – I know, I treat my son that way. Haniel is a great boy, Saina raised him well and they both deserve so much better.

"Is it true?" He asked again. Sa pagkakataong iyon ay talagang nakatingin na ako kay Mr. Consunji. "Your boy is friends with my grandson. Saina told me earlier to spare you. She knows my moves. She's been friends with the family for a long time and I know she heard things about how I treat bad people – especially those that wronged my family."

My mouth parted. Why would she do that? I never told her anything.

"Don't get her wrong. I think, she's still doing it for my grandson. Saina maybe a lot of things but she is a great mother to Haniel. And while she was talking to me earlier, iniisip niyang kapag idinamay kita rito, mawawalan ka ng trabaho, I will make sure no one will hire you again and that will affect your son, if that happens, he'll get sad and my Haniel will be sad to because they are friends and considering that, I don't want my boy to feel that way, so I am sparing you, but make sure that our paths will never ever cross again, Attorney Birada. Do not fight against me because I will only give into this consideration once, if we happen to cross paths again, I won't be so nice."

Shall I say thank you? I swallowed and nodded at him. He waved his hand as a sign of dismissal. Hindi ko alam kung anong mararamdaman ko habang naglalakad ako paalis ng conference room na iyon. Saina asked him to spare me. Does she not believe that I can fight my own battles? Pakiramdam ko minamaliit niya ang kakayahang mayroon ako.

I clenched my fists as I get to the elevator. Hindi ako makapaniwala. How am I supposed to talk to her now? I'm pissed. Hindi siya dapat nakikipag – usap in behalf of me. Did she do it because we're dating now? Ni hindi pa rin malinaw sa aming dalawa kung ano nga ba ang stand namin sa isa't isa. I wanted another talk. I am very careful about whatever relationship I am building with other people. Hindi ako basta papasok sa isang relasyon just because I feel horny or because Saina said so.

Isa pa, hindi ko alam kung anong sasabihin ni Alona sa bagay na ito. Sa isip ko kasi kailangan approve kay Alona ang babaeng makakasama ko. I know that we can never get back together, but I want her to be friends with whoever I am with... Hindi ko maipaliwanag, pero kung hindi approve kay Alona, I'll never date.

I sighed again. Do I need to text Saina? Where is she by the way? I shook my head. I need to focus on something else. As if on cue, my phone rang, it's Alona. She's been back for a month pero iisang beses palang silang nagkikita ni Joshua. Sinagot ko naman ang tawag niya kaaagad.

"Hey, Lov—I mean Alona." I sighed. Old habits die hard talaga.

"Hello, Gerry, are you busy?"

"Hindi naman. Pauwi na ako. Mamayang four susunduin ko si Joshua sa school. Why? Do you need me or something?" I hope I didn't sound as hopeful as I tried not to be.

"Sana. My car broke and I don't have a ride home. Nandito ako sa shoot, patapos na kami sana, pero dumating iyong isang boss namin and the other boss requested for another shots for the commercial, so matatagalan pa ako and my friend who's with me now really needed to go, so wala akong ride pauwi. Pwede bang maglambing? Pwede bang sunduin mo ako and then after that we'll pick Joshua up and maybe we can have dinner as a family?"

Napangiti ako. Joshua would love that, so it's not hard for me to say no.

Thirty minutes later , I found myself inside an unfamiliar building with, I was escorted to the underground after I told the guard my name and in there, I found my ex – wife, dressed in a sheer white dress that made her look ethereal.

Alona is beautiful. Morena siya, matangkad, and her body is just right for her height, she's really the model type. Natatandaan kong napakaraming lalaki ang nagkakadarap sa kanya noong college, but she chose me, she wanted to be with me. Hindi man kami nag-work sa huli, maybe I still am lucky.

She saw me, and she beamed. Agad siyang lumapit sa akin. I was expecting a friendly hi, or a friendly hug, but she gave me a light peck on my lips, and I was sure that she lingered a bit. Nang maghiwalay kaming dalawa ay na-freeze ang ngiti ko. I wanted to ask her what that was about but she looked back and she introduced me to her boss.

"Gers, this is Miss Rai, she's one of the bosses of Bella." Mukhang mabait ang boss niya. I smiled.

"Is this bring your boyfriend to work day, cause if it is, nobody told me. I could've brought that guy I fucked last night!" Nanlaki ang mga mata ko. The boss sounded so casual about it. "Anyway, nice meeting you, Gers?"

"Gerardo Birada." Pakilala ko habang hawak ang kamay niya. Kitang – kita kong tumaas ang kilay niya habang tinitingnan ako mula ulo hanggang paa.

"And she kissed you?" Sabi ng babae sa akin. "Really?" Nakatingin siya may Alona at sa akin.

"Ow, I guess old habits die hard. We used to be married."

"Not married now, right? You were engaged to another man and you're supposed to be seeing someone." Nawala ang ngiti ko nang sabihin niya iyon sa akin na tila ba siguradong – sigurado siya. "But I guess that's not really my business huh."

"What do you mean, Miss Rai?" Nagtatakang tanong ni Alona. Hindi naman nagsalita iyong Rai, kahit ako ay nagtataka na rin. How did she know that I was supposed to be seeing someone? I didn't even tell Alona about Saina yet.

"Oh, this is interesting." Wika niya sabay lingon sa likod. "Saina, my dear, come meet the model's ex – husband." Rai tone was kind of amused and yet dark. Napaawang ang labi ko nang maintindihan ko kung anong sinasabi niya, at kung sino ang tinawag niya. "Oh, she's not gonna be happy about it."

"What's happening?" Alona asked.

After some minutes, I saw Saina walking toward us. Her overall look alerted me. Blood shot eyes, swollen lips and cheeks. My mouth parted, my heart raced. Kung kanina ay naiinis ako dahil sa pakikipag-usap niya kay Gabriel Consunji para sa akin, ngayon ay gusto ko siyang yakapin, ilayo at itago sa mundong ito.

"I need to go get Haniel, one of the twins is sick and Uriel can't pick him up." She wasn't looking at us, but on her phone. Garalgal pa ang boses niya. "Can I take your driver, Rai? I don't think I can drive. I might --- Birada..." Hindi niya naituloy ang sinasabi niya nang mapatingin siya sa akin. "What, what are..."

"This is Alona, and that's her ex-husband, and they kissed, my dear Saina." I wanted to say something but Saina was quick to change her demeanor. Suddenly, I saw the woman I first met in her dad's office, the distant, cold bitch who insulted me.

"I see." She looked at her friend again. "So, can I take your driver? I need to go and take my son."

"Sure, sure. Will I see you tomorrow? Or will you go back to that hell hole?"

"I resigned today, so you will be seeing more of me." She looked at Alona and I. "Nice work Alona and it's nice that you're working things with your ex. Good day to all of you."

"Call me later, darling!"

"Sure will."

Saina walked away, and all I could do is look at her as she leaves. I wanted to follow her, but at that moment, I know that I have no right to do it. So, I stayed, with a heavy heart, I stayed with Alona...