-I'm actually not funny. I'm just mean and people think I'm joking.

-I'm not saying I hate you, but I'd unplug your life support to charge my phone

-OH, SO YOU WANNA ARGUE? BRING IT. I GOT MY CAPS LOCK ON.

-If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ. (I personally really liked this one lmao)

-I can't talk to you today. I talked to two people yesterday (This is me though)

-Sometimes it physically pains me to hold back my sarcastic comments

-If you ignore me, I will ignore you. If you don't start the conversation, we won't talk. If you don't put any effort, why should I? (This is why I only have a few close friends)

-I love sarcasm. It's like punching people in the face, but with words.

-Sorry for those mean, awful, accurate things I said.

-If only closed minds came with closed mouths

-Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you'll find a brain back there

-I'd agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong

-Your flexibility amazes me. How do you get your foot in your mouth and your head up your ass all at the same time (😎😂)

-It's called karma, and it's pronounced 'haha fuck you'.

-Abracadabra! Nope. You're still a bitch

-Yes, I walked away mid-conversation. You were boring me to death and my survival instincts kicked in.

-Revenge is beneath me. Accidents, however, will happen (😈)

-If you're cooler than me, doesn't that make me hotter than you? (Go on, write it down...I know you want to)

Sorry, there is only a little bit but I am WAAAAAY to lazy to write the rest...BUT don't fear because I will come back with more *crowd goes wild in background* Welp I've got's to go fair well 👋