Yo motherfuckers! It's Michelle Jibber, people know me better by the name of 'MJ'.

See that pic above? It's me in my childhood. Don't worry, I wasn't bullied, those are just some wounds I got while I was still learning how to climb on trees and when I was grooming myself to become the biggest thug on this planet! I stay more on the trees than my house and jump on roofs of other people's house than normally walk on the streets.

I love pizzas with a pineapple on top!
I don't have specific preferences with food or women because according to me, they are not your life but just a part of your life.
I do not believe in love, I just believe in attaining pleasure while you can. 

I do like sports because sports and sex are kind of the same. Both need stamina and both make you feel good. And both are not everyone's cup of tea cause asexual people. I may sound like a lunatic but then again—Not everyone's opinions matters and definitely not yours. Now then, lemme take you a bit into the depth of my life.

If I had to sum up my life in two words, it would be 'SUDDEN CHANGES'

I was born and raised up in Virginia City, which is a ghost town in southwest Bailey County, Texas, United States. That is, until my dad got arrested in a murder case and was sentence for life imprisonment when I was ten. Yep, that's why I'm currently speaking in a country accent. I was born and raised among the cattle, wheat fields, under the open sky and fresh country air. I loved Texas, but my mom had different plans.

Mom was turning mad with happiness.

"FINALLY! I CAN LIVE MY LIFE!" Mom shouted as she came out of the church. Oh, did I tell you? Dad's family was very religious, mom was an atheist. That's why grandma didn't like her very much.

Mom then married an Welshman who was ten years younger to my dad but ten times more successful than him. You know what, I have a gut feeling that she was cheating on dad with him and it was all a conspiracy to get dad arrested so that they could marry. You know why? Because, that's what his business is—To kill people in return of money. Yep, he's a European mafia.

And I was the son of a poor farmer, living in Virginia. Mom used to go out to the city for work and that was where she met him. After her marriage, I lived in Wales with my uncle and my step brother, Ralf Kaise. Mom had developed that Brit accent but mine was a fairly country accent. And they hated it. So, I had a teacher who "fixed" my accent and I learnt the Brit English with the accent. Then, she moved with him and left me at my grandma's place. Yep, my "parents" just shipped me halfway across the world to my grandma.

"Grandma, I like horses. Could you get me one?" I, as a brat, asked my grandma.
"Aww, you wanna ride a horse?" Grandma, who was a very kind woman, too kind for this world, smiled.

"No, I've heard animal sex feels amazing. My friend told me that. He did it with his goat the other day" I said. Mind it I'll tell you, I was eight back then. Yes, my childhood was pretty much ruined because of my seventeen year old friends.
"WHAT?!" Grandma fainted.
She decided to get me baptized at the church and we went to the pope. He told her maybe I should join the choir and sing the songs of praise to our lord and savior, Jesus Christ.

She enrolled me in the choir and soon after, we had a performance. 
I guess I messed up. 

https://youtu.be/0bQo05vUjBQ

That was the last time I talked to my grandma, cause after that, she passed away as she couldn't take such huge shocks one after another.

I'm not a zoophile guys. I didn't fuck any animals. I'm only interested in the human species. Am I the only one who thought of something like that in my childhood? Most probably.

Life in Texas is boring so no shit, bros.

I'm only going to say a few things about this, speaking purely from the perspective of science and research. Humans are animals. Having a supposedly relatively greater capacity for high-reasoning does not somehow magically alter our biological nature, and we are not the only animals capable of thought, feeling, or desire. Guess I used my entire vocab in this one paragraph.

Let's not get into the details...

So, my uncle or my mom's new husband who I wasn't ready to call 'dad' used to come visit me every once in a while. At that time, I was a very innocent, to be honest, I wasn't, and curious and a completely normal brat.

"Uncle, if I put this tooth beneath my pillow, will the tooth fairy come?" I asked him.
"Call me "dad", Mitch. And yes, she will—"
"Can I take her virginity?"
"...Who is teaching you all this?"

Welp. That was the end of life for my seventeen year old friends. Uncle decided to take me to Los Angeles with him since they had shifted there from Wales. Apparently the police was looking for him there so he decided to just come here to LA for a few years. I was bullied in middle school because of my British accent. So, I switched to country accent and they made fun of me even then. So, I stopped speaking and just observed the Californian accent. In the three years of middle school, I was speaking just like all of my Californian friends. 

As I told before, uncle is a mafia boss. That's some interesting job. And surprisingly he realized that I had talent to take his business to new horizons because of my gut feeling which I inherited from my dad. But, before I could get the first gun of my life, I was forced to babysit my stepbrother—The biological son of the uncle and his former wife.

Till then, I started going to Kerlin County High where I met a very meek, feeble and innocent looking guy. He had a short frame and seemed as if he would blow away with just a whistle. He was Louisianez, guys. I fell in love at first sight the moment I looked at him. Then, I realized he was a trap. Louisianez was a boy.

He was badly bullied at school. Even I started pitying him at some point. Finally, after vacations, he made a strong comeback and beat the living shit out of his bullies in front of the entire school. I found that they were all hospitalized due to excess loss of blood and their facial muscles were dislocated.

At that time, I felt so excited that I wanted to jump out of my skin and rush towards Louise but maybe he won't like it if a skeleton was rushing towards him, right? I don't know man, it's fun to play with a skeleton. At least I enjoyed it. The skull is so pretty. So, I just decided to meet him normally. I packed myself inside a box and lay it out for courier. Well,  that's at least how uncle does it.

   
After a few bumps here and there, I finally decided to open the box and see if there was life around me or was I on Mars all together.

Yeah, I know this reference.

And yeah, I can break the fourth wall.

That's how badass I am. Fuck yeah! When I opened the box and got out—I'm not kidding, I literally found myself inside a gutter. NO WONDER I WAS FEELING COLD AND MY JEANS WERE WET! I got out of of the gutter and saw Louise standing in front of me.

He still looked meek and tender.

"Oh? So you're alive?" He glared at me with his purple eyes. His voice was squeaky, like a normal freshman. My clothes were in a terrible condition. I looked no less than a beggar.

"What did you do to me?" I covered my chest.
"You ain't got no boobs, what are you even hiding?"
"Erm, my nipples?"

Since he was at the peak of his puberty, and his testosterone was running wild, he was pretty short tempered unlike he is now.
"Listen, you gay ass, I am straight and alpha as fuck!"
I got up. I WAS LEGIT TALLER THAN HIM! Louise was so goddamn cute back then.

WHAT HAPPENED NOW?! HE SHOT UP LIKE A GIRAFFE!

"Don't hit me yet!" I begged.
"And what will I get if I don't hit you?" Louise asked. I'm talking about a time when both of us were high-school first years, fifteen years old dudes just chillin' in beach slippers on Californian streets.

"If you don't beat me, I'll give you a blowjob"
Straight white males are scary. I remember after that, I was beaten so badly I lost count of how many times I had been punched. I almost saw the heaven doors opening and Satan calling me inside with a halo on his head, to give me protection.

At this point I knew, I WAS TURNING CRAZY! I kicked Satan in his face and realized that it was the doctor. My uncle had sent his men to kill Louise, but he beat them out of their wits.

When I knew about it, I redeveloped an instant crush on him. He was tiny and cool. So fucking adorable. I loved hanging out with him! It's fun to hang out with people who beat you up. But then, he slowly started growing tall until he crossed my height and his voice turned deeper than mine. And the day this happened, I lost all my sexual interest in him. I like badass and strong people who look cute but they can kill you. Louise looked like he could kill you and as a matter of fact, he could kill you.

Initially, he was bothered and hated my company. But I made him get used to me and my gut and now we are best buddies. We are two inseparable homies. Who might separate after graduation but well, that how life works. 

We decided we'd work together, Louise and I, and bring down the bullying ratio in Los Angeles, so we made the rehabilitation club. But, it wasn't liked by the student council who termed it as a means of promoting violence and hence we got cancelled. So, we started a music club which was just a disguise for the rehabilitation club.

He started smoking soon after and got a tattoo on his shoulder. He was getting more and more masculine. His body began turning more muscular, his shoulders broadened. I guess, I saw Louise transform and become a man from a boy in front of my eyes. 
Proud dad moment.

Then, I met Malcolm. He was popular back then because of his looks and he wasn't into Gothic culture by then. He had a friend called Ryan, an Irishman who had known Malcolm since childhood. Well, shit happened and Ryan died because you see...Some people are disgusting.

After Ryan passed away, Malcolm took over as a bassist and a gave up singing. Jerome auditioned for the club and got selected as the guitarist and keyboardist. I became the advisor and dyed my brunette hair green and Louise dyed his black hair emo blue. Since it was a secret club, we needed an alias, especially me and Louise. I named myself MJ—THE THUG!

Louise was forcefully named—LOUISA—THE UNBEATABLE BEAUTY!

And surprisingly, the bullying ratio has gone down after we started our work because people are too afraid to bully even an ant now! I totally get their fear though. Bully others and you will die. Thank God his testosterone is much calmer now. BUT IT'S STILL DANGEROUS!

And today, I'm here again after exactly three years. We are gonna fight again! I'm challenging him and the good news is that now I'm stronger! The bad news is—HE IS STRONGER TOO!

-To be continued

#Highschoolfirstyear
When Louise broke his leg at a dance party.
Yep, that cool brother who's CARRYING Louise is me—MJ!
Why did he grow up?
TwT My baby!