I'm on another mission.

Mission to avoid Roman James at all cost.

It's not like we breathed down each other's neck before anyways. But since that almost kiss happened I've decided to stay as far away from him as possible.

That guy is trouble, pure trouble. Plus a distraction. I've got a list, a plan and I intend to complete it. I'm not going to let anyone ruin it. Not even Roman James. He's the kind of distraction I don't need right now or ever.

I don't think I would be able to go through with my plan if I don't stay away from him. He makes me feel things that I thought I would never feel again. Just the mere thought of him gives me these stupid butterflies and his eyes do a different kind of thing to me. I need to keep my emotions out of this and at a distance. It is something I mastered a long time ago, but Roman is different from any other man and it scares the shit out of me.

"We're talking to you. Stop zoning out, Avery!" Claudia snaps at me and I crash back to reality.

Right now though, I have a different kind of problem in my hands.

I still have no idea what's going on with Claudia and Lily, but here they are, on a Saturday afternoon sitting in my dining room, bashing men without details as to why they are ranting.

Oh and let's not forget about Amelia. She doesn't have a boyfriend but she's going on and on about Garret.

This girl has a serious crush on him.

"You know what, let's start from the start," I speak, as I take a sip of my apple juice. All three of them nod their heads and take a sip of their juice as well.

"Ben just doesn't understand." Claudia starts.

"What do you want him to understand?" I ask patiently.

"He needs to understand that I hate it--" she starts speaking just as the front door opens and a frowning Roman enters the house.

Shit! I forgot to lock the door.

Why is he here though?

Before I can ask him what he's doing here, he speaks, still frowning, "Why is your door unlocked? You should keep your door locked all the time when you're home alone, Angel."

I roll my eyes. I keep my door locked all the time, but his concern is cute.

"Cute," I catch Amelia muttering.

I give her a look and she winks in return making me roll my eyes again.

"What are you doing here?" I ask coolly, just as my mind wanders back to our almost kiss last night.

I just hope I'm not blushing furiously right now.

He looks back at the door and frowns again but catches up with the question.

"Oh! Your mom dropped her ID at ours last night." He replies and takes out the ID and hands it over to me.

"My mom's not home right now, but I'll give it to her when she's back."

"You guys having a girl's day?" He raises an eyebrow and looks at all four of us.

"More likely a pity party," Lily growls.

Roman looks confused but wisely doesn't speak. But before I can politely ask him to go away, Amelia beats me to it.

"Now that you're here Roman why don't you join us? We could certainly use some advice from a guy right now."

I look exasperatedly at Amelia but she just grins and winks at me, again.

Damn that wink!

"You know what? She's right. I don't particularly like you, but we do need a man's advice right now." Claudia speaks and I mentally groan.

No no no! I was supposed to stay away from him! This is not good for my plan.

I glare at Roman, openly showing that I don't want him here, but that cheeky bastard grins and takes a seat beside me.

Fucker!

"Lay it on me, ladies." He puffs his chest out.

Looks like he is staying for a good amount of time here. I just wish he wouldn't say anything about last night. I don't think I can handle any more embarrassment right now.

"Let's start from the start, again. What do you want Ben to understand about Claudia?"

"No, I want Lily to go first," Claudia mutters and I look at Lily.

She's being so quiet and sad and I've never seen her sad. She isn't as cheery as Amelia, but she isn't bleak either.

Lily sighs hard while staring at her beautiful long butterfly pendant, twisting it absently while remaining lost in thought. "Kyle has gotten a little more aggressive lately than usual. He punched a guy last night because the guy's hand might have groped my ass when we were out for movies. Don't get me wrong, groping someone's ass is wrong but I'm upset at his aggressiveness. He can't lose his temper on every guy with a wandering hand."

"He grabbed your ass in front of Kyle?" Amelia asks in shock. "I'm surprised Kyle let him walk away."

"Sounds like Kyle had a justifiable reaction to me," Roman whispers, leaning down to my ear.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"If someone would've groped your ass while you were with me, I would've broken their hands." He shrugs and goes back to listening to whatever the girls are saying, leaving me shocked.

I try not to blush furiously, but I know I am.

Does he not know the kind of effect he has on me? He can't say things like that and then act like it's nothing.

I clear my throat and take deep breaths, trying to calm down my racing heart.

"I think it was justifiable," Roman says and he's met with a glare I didn't know Lily was capable of.

"Punching anyone or getting in a fight with anyone is justifiable? What if they're stronger than Kyle and he ends up in some serious trouble?" She growls, taking her anger out on the only man in sight.

Horrified at Lily's outburst, he scoots his chair to sit as close to me as he can get and as far away from Lily as he can manage. I'd laugh but now is not the time.

I pick my juice to take a sip but Roman snatches it away and takes a sip himself muttering something about Jesus saving him.

Claudia decides to take her turn after a long, deep breath. "I love Ben. I do but his swearing is getting on my nerves. He swears all the time. His sentences start and end with profanity and I don't think I can handle it anymore."

"I know he swears a lot but what do you mean by you can't handle it anymore?" I ask softly, if she means what I think she means, Ben is going to be devastated.

"Every time he swears, the memories of my father come rushing back." She speaks so quietly that we almost don't hear her.

"He used to verbally abuse both me and my mother. It took my mom a long time to gather herself up and leave, and we're in a good place now. I have an amazing stepfather who loves me a lot. I don't have any kind of issues because of the love my stepfather gave me and don't get me wrong, I swear too but there's a limit. But memories come rushing back because of Ben's constant profanities. I was okay at first, but it's disturbing me a lot now.

"I've asked him to stop his constant swearing and he controls himself for a day or two but then things just go back like they were on day three. It's getting hard for me to stay around Ben and not let the memories affect me or our relationship but I don't think I can handle it anymore." She finishes, and a single tear rolls down her cheek.

My heart hurts for her and we all stay quiet for a few seconds, digesting the information she has just dumped on us, but it's Roman who breaks the silence.

"Have you tried talking to him?" Roman asks softly, concern evident in his eyes.

"No, I mean I told him that I hate his constant profanities but I never told him the reason though." She replies, regret shining in her eyes.

"You know, you need to talk to him about this if you want this to work, Claudia." I touch her hand gently over the table.

"The whole male species suck," Amelia whispers lost in her own thoughts.

Roman looks at her with fake accusing eyes, "You don't even have a man, why are you cursing the male species?"

"Just because I don't have a boyfriend, doesn't mean I don't have a crush." Amelia rolls her eyes and I snicker.

"Why Amelia, who's your crush I wonder," I speak as I decide to ruffle Amelia's feathers a bit to lighten everyone's mood.

"Who's your crush?" Roman asks her, then looks at me, and then Lily and Claudia. Lily barks out a laugh which Roman misinterprets and comically widens his eyes.

"Don't tell me, it's me."

Amelia raises her head and puts her finger in her mouth, mocking a silent gag making all of us laugh out loud except Roman.

"You wish. Don't get me wrong, if I weren't crushing on someone already, I would've definitely tried it on you." She speaks, making Roman raise his eyebrows.

She merely shrugs, "You're too hot to resist, but your hotness does nothing for me."

"So who is this crush?" Roman leans forward and asks.

"You don't wanna know," Lily mutters from his left side.

"Come on, tell me. Maybe I'll set you up with him." Roman coaxes her and Amelia's eyes to lighten up at his last words.

"Garret. "

His eyebrows shoot up as he leans back and asks in shock, "Garret?"

"Yes Garret, why are you so shocked?" She narrows her eyes at him.

"He just doesn't seem to be your type. I've known you for the last four years even though only from afar and you don't go for that type." Roman speaks cautiously to not offend her in any way.

"Dude, he's got this whole mysterious bad boy persona going for him and I can't help but feel a bit more attracted to him every day I see him." Amelia frowns but honestly admits her feelings and I can't help but feel a bit pathetic because I can't admit my attraction towards Roman even to myself.

It's nothing much though, I think. Just a bit of chemistry here and there. The kind of chemistry that makes me dizzy whenever I am around him. I can't help but feel a pull that tugs me towards him every time he smiles at me. The kind of smile he only reserves for me. But nothing much though, just a little attraction that I can easily ignore or I think that I can.

Denial isn't only a river in Egypt, said the chorus girl to the bishop.

I ignore the little voice in my head and tune in to the conversation again and hear Amelia going on and on about how she feels for Garret, even though she's never talked to him in person.

"But Garret--" Roman starts speaking, but Amelia cuts him off in between still telling him about her feelings, "--isn't the bad boy." He ends up in a whisper.

I look at him, what does he mean he isn't a bad boy?

I raise my eyebrows at him and he answers my silent question. "He's very... I don't know. Sweet? Thoughtful? That kind of boy, not the bad boy your friend thinks he is." Roman whispers and I suppress a megawatt smile that tries to appear on my face.

"Don't tell her," I whisper back and take another sip of my juice.

"Why?"

"She needs to get over this crush on her own or she'll be left wondering about 'what ifs' if you tell her that her fantasies hold no realities and she backs off without even trying." I nonchalantly shrug and play with the straw in my hand ignoring the strange look Roman is giving me.

My life has always been based on what-ifs. What if I'd never given into Will's fake declarations of love? What if I'd never gone to that party? What if I'd never pressed charges and pretended that nothing happened?

These 'what ifs' had killed me slowly and painfully when I was in Sea Crest. When I used to sit near my window and look outside at all those happy kids, playing with no one there to make their life a living hell. I used to wonder, what my life would've been if nothing had happened.

I would've still been the beautiful girl, every boy crushed on. I would've been better at dance and probably would've enrolled myself in a prestigious dance uni. I would've been a normal teenager with a normal life.

I don't want to suffer from more 'what ifs' in my life anymore though. That's why when we moved to California, I promised myself I will live my life fully, I'll never have any regrets. But I know I'm not living, yet. I'm barely surviving. I'm trying to gather my life back from the ground. It'll take me some time to forget everything or leave everything in the past, but I do intend to live fully at some point in my life.

"Are you even listening to me?" Amelia growls at Roman and I snap back to reality.

"Yeah, yeah I am listening to you."

*****

As the afternoon drags on, the conversation takes a calming turn. Of Course, there has been a lot of crying and growling and cursing and whatnot, but I and Roman are handling it well. At least I think we're handling it well because the girls are now acknowledging the situation and the problems they have in their love lives.

Lily grumbles after finishing her third glass of juice. "The guy shouldn't have touched me. I mean, I sure as hell didn't want him to, but I would've handled it more subtly. Kyle can't lose his temper on every guy with a wandering hand, but he only did it because he loves me. I mean I would've definitely not liked it if he did nothing after a guy groped my ass in front of him. What kind of man will that make him?"

Roman glares at her as he tries his best to keep his mouth shut and takes a sip of my juice. He's been saying that for most of the afternoon, but every time he opens his mouth he gets barked at, much to my amusement.

He goes to take another sip of my juice and I whack him away. He's been doing that the whole time, drinking my juice even though I offered him a separate glass with a separate straw, but he refused them both and kept latching on to my straw every now and then, and somehow we ended up sharing the juice and the straw.

"Maybe once I tell Ben about my past, he'll understand me deeper and tone it down. Everyone deserves a second chance, right?" Claudia asks and Roman practically growls at her.

He said the same thing thirty-five minutes ago and Claudia, Lily, and Amelia together unleashed hell on him, and then Claudia broke into tears again. He'll definitely have PTSD after this conversation and likely stay away from girls for a while.

"I know I don't exist for him, but I will have to toughen up and talk to him, right?" Amelia speaks and Roman just rolls his eyes but wisely says nothing.

He has kept quiet most of the time when it came to Amelia, only answering questions she asked. I think he just doesn't want to get her hopes up.

Just as Lily starts to open her mouth again someone rings the doorbell. Before I can even get up from my chair, Ben drags himself into the dining room.

"Finally!" Roman sighs and drops his head on my shoulder and I try not to feel delighted by the sweet tickling of his hair at my neck.

Claudia looks at him and gives him a tight smile as more tears filled her eyes.

"Baby," Ben whispers and looks at her with regret clearly shining in his eyes. "I'm sorry, I promise to not hurt you anymore."

Claudia bursts into tears and jumps in his arms, latching onto him tightly. "I-I have to tell you something. No, I have to tell you a lot."

Ben hugs her tightly and then asks her to go somewhere quiet where they can talk and solve everything. They both bid their goodbyes and leave but not before Ben thanks, Roman.

I give him a confused look and he looks up at me from my shoulder and smiles proudly, "I texted them both briefing about the situation and how they need to talk to their girls."

Just a second later the door opens again and this time Kyle struts into the room, his eyes directly going to Lily.

He gives her an apologetic smile and opens his mouth, "I know I've been snapping a lot but I won't apologize for what I did, Lils. I can't just stand there and watch another man lay a hand on you."

Lily smiles proudly and walks up to him and strokes his cheek affectionately. "I know, I'm sorry for being so upset. If you hadn't punched him, I would've punched you myself for letting someone grope my ass like that."

Kyle grins uncontrollably, "I love you."

"I love you too" Lily reaches up and kisses the hell out of him that I have to turn my face away from the ongoing scene and I grin uncontrollably too.

They all have become close friends of mine and seeing them happy makes me happy too.

Roman presses his face in the crook of the neck, as Kyle and Lily suck each other's faces and I can't help but feel that he just sniffed me which transports me back to the first day of our senior year, where I snarled at him for sniffing me. I can't help but think how far we've all come and the outcome couldn't have been better.

Kyle gives Roman a I'm watching you gesture by pointing two fingers at his own eyes and then at Roman's when he sees Roman's face pressed into the crook of my neck, to which Roman flips him off as he leaves with Lily.

Now that all of them have gone, I and Roman turn to look at Amelia, curiously. This is the longest she's gone without cursing the male species.

Of course, watching all this sweet romance has put Amelia in a somber mood. She's turned green with envy which makes me coo at her, "Em, it's okay. You just need to pull on the big girl panties and talk to Garret."

She sighs but nods anyway, but before I can say anything else, the doorbell rings again, but no one enters the house this time though.

"Come in!" Roman calls and rests his head on my shoulder again.

To my utter surprise, it's Garret who enters the room this time.

He looks just as confused as to why he's here, just like me and Amelia, but I do notice the way Amelia's eyes light up when she sees him.

She's going to be so disappointed when she finds out Garret is nothing like she's imagined him in her mind.

"Hi, Avery." Garret smiles politely and I wave at him.

He looks at Amelia and nods towards her as well.

"You see Garret, this precious lady here needs a ride home. I can't drive her back because Avery's mom is not here and I'm babysitting her in her absence. So I had to call you and ask for help. Can you please drive her safely to her home?" Roman asks as he winks at Amelia.

She gives him a cheeky grin and practically beams at Garret.

"Why not." He shrugs and asks Amelia to lead the way.

She gets up quickly, rounds the table, kisses me on the cheek, and to my surprise, she kisses Roman's cheek too and quietly thanks him.

He definitely gained points in her eyes.

As they both leave, I sigh and drop my head back.

It's been an... adventurous day.

Roman quickly drops a whisper of a kiss on my shoulder and leans back in his chair, just as I stiffen up.

I narrow my eyes at him and he narrows his eyes right back. "How about we talk now?"

"We don't have anything to talk about," I speak as I get up and gather all the glasses and straws lying on the table and walk into the kitchen.

"We certainly have a lot to talk about, angel."

"It's six pm Roman, if you don't want to face my mom's wrath, I suggest you leave now because she'll be back anytime now." I exit the kitchen and raise an eyebrow at him.

He glances at the watch on his wrist and curses, as he stands up and walks up to the front door. "Well I'm going now, but we will talk. You can't escape me, angel."

I let out a chuckle and look at his retreating back.

"And lock the door!"

******
A new chapter after agesssss but it's finally here.
I hope you liked it! If you're still reading this book lmao.
Anyway hope you all are doing well!
Teaser ~ A weird lunch break.
Happy reading
Kiara <3