Tenderness
After our offer was accepted and we finally got through all the technicalities and red tape, our life became even more hectic. We each packed up our lives and had movers bring all of it into one space. I spent my time meticulously sorting through my belongings, purging things that didn't have value or bring me joy. I had years of journals, notebooks, and tapes, now sitting in the foyer. Candles, incense and little trinkets were in scattered boxes, all over the new house and the stacks only grew into mountains when Lindsey's things arrived. Once the last of it was brought in, I just started to laugh. This would be a huge undertaking and I think somewhere in my mind, I thought it would be a breeze.
Decorating a house and deciding where things go with another person was a whole new ball game. Before, we had nothing and most of our things were either purchased together though necessity or given to us. Our apartment was empty just due to lack of money, but the years spent apart and the money gained definitely helped to fill up the space. Lindsey's grand idea was to shove it all in one of the bedrooms upstairs and deal with it later, while I wanted to get it done as soon as possible. Christmas is only a couple of weeks away, we have a wedding to plan and my tour begins in May. Five months to give our lives some semblance of order now seems impossible. Thankfully, my pouting and puppy dog eyes kick him into high gear and he worked even faster than I did at putting all the important items where they need to go. By week's end, I felt like we could finally relax.
For the first time, we sit at our kitchen table and enjoy dinner together, my feet in his lap as he rubs my calf.
"Welcome home, baby" he says and I smile broadly.
"Now you're stuck" I tell him and he shakes his head.
"Proud to be. I love you."
"I love you too." This entire process so far, though strange and difficult, was nothing short of a dream. It was all finally working out and it was easy.
"What are you thinking about?"
"The wedding" I say, realizing I had gone off with the fairies.
"Colors and dresses?" he asks, smirking.
"No, about finally being yours...forever."
"I can't wait for that day. If I could marry you right this minute, I would."
"I wouldn't fight you, but I think our friends and family should be there. Nothing big."
"That sounds perfect" he says, pushing away his plate that had been practically cleaned. I'm glad he still likes my cooking. "I'm kind of shocked you don't want something...grand."
"I don't need that now. With Robin gone, I..." I can't think about it. She was my best friend, she was taken far too soon and I thought I would be doing all of this with her.
He takes my hand across the table and he rubs his thumb over my knuckles. "When would you like to set a date?"
"Whenever." I shrug.
"How about we get formally engaged first?"
"Alright." I go back to my plate and he withdraws his hand from mine. He leaves the table and I slouch a little while I pick at my food.
"Stephanie, you done?" he asks from the top of the stairs.
"Yeah, I guess so." I reply and he gives me the most handsome, boyish smile.
"Come on up!"
I'm confused and he knows it as he watches me carefully climb the stairs that I still hate but I'm getting used to. I follow him to our bedroom and I look around. There are rose petals scattered on the bed, candles are lit and the lights are low. I give him a look and he laughs. "When did you do all this?" I ask, now spotting wine chilling on a table in the sitting area of our massive bedroom.
"While you were cooking. I hadn't lit the candles yet, I nearly broke my neck trying to do that before you got suspicious."
I smile at him. "You're such a goofball"
"I'm cute though, right?"
"Yes, but don't tell my boyfriend, he might get jealous."
"Ouch!" he says, grabbing his chest and feigning a mix of hurt and offense. I giggle and he gains his composure, leading me by the hand to sit on our bed. He kneels before me and it clicks. He produces a small velvet box and opens it. The light from the candles illuminate this gorgeous diamond ring and it takes my breath away. "Our parents would kill us for living in sin for the second time" he says with a laugh.
"That they would."
"I've been wanting to do this exact thing for years and for some reason, something or someone always got in the way. You are the love of my life. We now have a beautiful house, our careers are doing vastly better than in 1973 and we are finally 'one'. There have been so many changes, positive changes and I think it's time. Stephanie Lynn Nicks, will you please do me the honor and privilege of being my wife?"
I don't need to think about the answer. "Yes"
He bit the inside of his cheek as I could see tears welling up in his eyes. He slides the ring onto my finger and he embraces me instantly, kissing my neck and shoulder. "I love you, I love you so much" he says, his voice muffled.
"I love you too, baby." He looks up at me, his eyes looking deep into mine. "When you asked me to marry you on the second to last night of tour, I knew what my answer would be. As I live with you and learn even more about you, I know we are meant to be. We've waited too long for this, and just like you said, I think it's time." I'm crying now too and he wipes my tears with his thumbs as gently as possible. Even this tiny moment of tender care, fills me with such a rush of love for him that I can barely stand it. My hands cup his cheeks and he closes his eyes briefly at the contact. I lean forward and kiss his lips just as softly as he had wiped my tears.
"I feel like even before I knew you existed, I was waiting for you" he whispers and I nod my agreement.
"And I for you."
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