QueenCobble: Yo

GrumpyTartarSauce: Sup Cobble

PirateKitty: Ayye wassup

QueenCobble: So my human slave's out with her boyfriend and everyone else is gone so wanna come get high?

PirateKitty: Sure, why not

GrumpyTartarSauce: Hell yeah boyz 🍻🍺

QueenCobble: Aight I'll be waitin on yall with the weed and catnip
                                                                                                                     ***
*ding dong*

Cobbledick: 'Heller'

Cat Steven: *has a big bag of catnip in her mouth* 'I brought some weeeeeeedddddd!!!*

Grumpy Cat: *has another bag of catnip* 'Same doe'

Cobbledick: 'Good, ya'll ain't useless after all! Come on, I got some stuff I wanna show ya'll on my human slave's phone that I stole.'

***meanwhile***

Cobbledick: 'Here goes the conversation they had before they almost made me deaf with their fucking.' *scrolls* 'And here goes when she was sending him nudes and stuff with her horny ass. Bet she did that with her other boyfriends too.'

Cat Steven: 'I was wondering why my human slave was fappin so much-'

Grumpy Cat: 'That and him returning the favor of sendin dicc piccs.'

Cat Steven: 'Ew, and I thought Steven was a church boy. What else ya got?'

Cobbledick: *goes to the other contacts, where some of Spinel's exes numbers are* 'Hmm...Brandon...Alejandro...CJ....Jeremiah...Harley? Hol the hell on-'

Grumpy Cat: 'Isn't Harley a girl name???'

Cat Steven: 'LESBIANS-'

Cobbledick: 'HOLY SHIT HARLEY'S A GIRL!!! Bro we GOTTA look through these messages and see what kinda lesbian shit my slave's been doing!!!!'

*Cobbledick quickly taps on it*

Grumpy Cat: 'Hey baby, I dreamed about you last night~ What-'

Cat Steven: 'WHAT DID SPINEL SAY-'

Cobbledick: *reads Spinel's response* 'Oh rlly? Tell me all about it 😏 And...here goes the kinky explanation that I aint fenna read out.' *scrolls* 'Oh god another nude pic!!'

Cat Steven: 'IS there a contact where NO ONE exchanges those things?'

Cobbledick: *looks through all the contacts* 'Nope...'

Grumpy Cat: *taps back onto Harley's contact* 'I can't be the only one that wants to see the breakup'

Cat Steven: 'r e a d'

Cobbledick: 'SPINEL I KNOW WHAT YOU DID!! IT'S FUCKING OVER BETWEEN US!!!😡😠😠😠 Damn-'

Grumpy Cat: 'And then Spinel says... Oh fuck you, Harley. Like she don't even care. I wonder what she did tho...'

Cobbledick: *looks* 'Probably cheated. I see something that said Why the hell would you fuck my BROTHER out of all people!?!? This is the 3rd time you've cheated, and I've had enough!! And now you act like you don't even care! And then Spinel said... I don't give a damn. That wasn't even the first time I've been hooking up with him. So, jokes on you 🖕 And the last message ever sent was Harley sending crying emojis and middle finger emojis. Damn, my slave was a hoe. I actually wanna see how the others broke up with her.'

Cat Steven: 'Let's do it!!!'
.....
-1 hr later-
*Cobbledick shuts down Spinel's phone with wide eyes after looking through all contacts*

Grumpy Cat: 'So it was pretty much Spinel cheatin in most of them with the exception of vice versa and her giving someone AIDS-'

Cobbledick: 'Yup...that was...something. I needa get some of that stuff outta my head, especially the sexting parts. What yall wanna do?'

Cat Steven: 'Hmm.....'

***
Cat Steven: *Bowser gets hit by a blue turtle shell* 'FUCK WHOEVER JUST DID THAT!!!!'

Cobbledick: *laughs evilly as Luigi gets in first place* 'Kiss my ass CS!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!'

Grumpy Cat: *Yoshi is still at the finish line* '...'

Cobbledick: 'Tartar Sauce, are you ever gonna move from the starter line?'

Grumpy Cat: 'I know what I'm doing.'

Cat Steven: *hits Cobbledick with a red turtle shell* 'HA!'

Cobbledick: 'DAMMIT!!!'

Cat Steven: 'I'M IN THE LEAD!'

Grumpy cat: 'Bet-'

*Cobbledick crosses the finish line and the screen says...*
THE WINNER IS TARTAR SAUCE!

Cobbledick: 'WHAT THE HELL-'

Cat Steven: 'HOW?!?!'

Grumpy Cat: *Grins* 'I snuck past yall ;)'

Cobbledick: 'Oh my god fuck you Tartar-'
***
*Meanwhile, the 3 cats are laying down, high as hell from the catnip, and bored as hell*
Cobbledick: 'I can see the light....'

Grumpy Cat: 'Well don't look at it.'

Cat Steven: 'Ya'll know what we need...'

Grumpy Cat: 'Some tom cats?'

Cat Steven: 'That and some more cat to party with us. Cobble, post on your Insta-'
***
4 hrs later Spinel comes back, only to hear loud rap music and the house is a mess. A cat has a lamphead on its head while spinning on a turntable, cats are running around tearing up furniture and such, and the smell of weed is everywhere

Spinel:...

Cobbledick: *high as fuck* 'Aaaaayyyyyyyyyeeee its my human slaaaaaavvvveee.'

Spinel: What...the absolute... FUCK?!?

Grumpy Cat: *passed out*

Random cats: *breaking kitchen supplies*

Cat Steven: 'WE INVITED THE WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD AND ITS AWESSSOOOMMMMEEEE'

Cobbledick: 'Yeah, and cats onnnllyyyy!!! SO SHOO!!!' *pushes Spinel out the door*
Spinel:....

Cobbledick: 'LET'S PARTY TILL WE'RE PURPLE!!!'

Cat Steven: 'I LOVE BEING PURPLE!!!' *says while falling off the couch*
.............
#Cobbledick
#PartyingTillWe'rePurple
#Worship