*Cobbledick just got back from scaring the hell outta the old lady next door with the other cats and gets on facetime with CS*
(Also there's some spoilers of chp15 of Medning Hearts if you didn't read it yet)

Cobbledick: 'Wassup bitch.'

Cat Steven: 'Nothing much, my human slave just came home looking depressed.'

Cobbledick: 'What happened?'

Cat Steven: 'How the fuck would I know that and he just came back?'

Cobbledick: 'Yeah whatever. Wanna know some dumb shit about my human slave?'

Cat Steven: 'She's back to being a whore?'

Cobbledick: 'Well yeah, but you already knew that. She's been throwing up, eating like shit, and is fat as hell. Ya know what? She doesn't believe she's a pregnant fuck.'

Cat Steven: 'Wouldn't that be common knowledge?'

Cobbledick: 'Fuck yeah. But apparently it's the flu. She looks scary as shit, and looks whiter than a vampire dude. And plus she's sick or something cause she's aching apparently, has a headache, and she looks worse than a pregnant bitch.'

Cat Steven: 'Give her another scar on the eye and maybe she'll go.'

Cobbledick: 'She won't cause she's a dumbass. No matter how much I say it she's just like Oh I'm fine and Im not pregnant! Dude talk about stupid ass.'

Cat Steven: 'Well if she does have a kid then what do ya think?'

Cobbledick: 'First of all, lemme break it down: The Good, the Bad, and the Pathetic.'

Cat Steven *sighs* 'Oh boy...'

Cobbledick: *pulls out chart* Ya see my good friend, there's not too much good in kids. If they're cute, sure. If they're not? Oh well.'

Cat Steven: 'Ok...and the bad?'

Cobbledick: 'Everything.'

Cat Steven: 'And the pathetic?'

Cobbledick: 'Everything. Especially the fact that their mom won't tell them their failed abortions. Just like my human slave's kid.'

Cat Steven: 'Yeah you're probably right. Have fun trying to tell Spinel she needs some help.'

Cobbledick: 'Aight. Come by later so we can smoke some catnip.'

Cat Steven: 'Yes! Later.'

*Cobbledick is offline*
*Cat Steven is offline*