Chapter 46 - Perfect

— Tris

"Now I can properly wish you a happy birthday," my husband takes my face with his hands and presses his lips to my cheek after I emerge from puking my guts out in the bathroom.

Twenty-six years old.
Gosh, I'm old.

"You better not be planning anything. There's already enough going on today," I sigh, wondering if I'll ever give in to the holiday of celebrating one's birth.

My stomach is still doing flips as I lay my head on his chest, my legs propping themselves over his legs. He wraps both arms around me, holding me close.

"How's your shoulder?" I ask. He got his cast off last week, and today we are going over to Erudite for an imaging of his shoulder and an ultrasound of my leg. They're also going to order bloodwork for me to be sure I do not have an infection causing my nausea.

"Sore," he replies shortly.

We sit in each other's company for a long while, and I groan when I finally lift my head to look at my phone.

"We have to leave in five minutes," I lift my head from his chest. "The train will be here in ten."

"Alright," he releases me from his arms and I go into our bedroom to grab my boots.

"Hey there, sweet boy," I scratch behind both of Indy's ears when he puts him head in my lap. "I have to put my shoes on, so you have to move," I laugh.

"See you later," I press a kiss to the top of his head and stand once my boots are on. He wags his tail, following me.

"He's really mellowing out as he gets older," Tobias comments.

"He's barely seven years old, Tobias!" I exclaim. "You're acting like he's as old as me!"

I take his hand in mine and he surprises me when he presses his lips to mine briefly and passionately. We head out of our apartment hand in hand to the main building where the train stop is.

We arrive outside just before the train gets there, and I am grateful we are not out in the cold for long.

Christmas is a week away, and today it is snowing, just like it does basically all winter in the city of Chicago.

The train is warm when we get inside and take a seat. Not many people are traveling today, most likely because of the snow, so there is just a few other people in the car we picked.

I take Tobias's hand in mine and play with his wedding band on his ring finger. Spinning it around his finger and watching it reflect small bits of light.

Erudite is not a great distance from Dauntless, so it is not even five minutes before we are outside of the medical building and back in the cold.

First we go to the radiology section, and Tobias checks in at the counter before sitting next to me in the waiting area. We sit in each other's company until his name is called. He gives me a small smile while releasing my hand and follows the nurse back behind the door.

I would have gone back with him if there was a purpose for me, but because of the radiation I cannot be in the room with him for the X-Ray, so I figured I might as well just stay out here.

I find myself staring at the small Christmas tree with blue and silver balls on it, and I somehow pull a memory from my head.

My first Christmas back in the city, I was still in this hospital, in critical condition. I don't recall much from the time, but I have a clear voice telling me about these trees.

Tobias had helped someone decorate one of those trees when he waited for me to get out of my third surgery.
I wasn't completely conscious when I woke, but I remember his soothing voice telling me about the blue color and the silver and how they reflected the lights.
I remember him telling me how worried he was about me, and I remember feeling relieved that he was able to find a distraction in decorating that small Christmas tree.

I'm not sure how long I loose myself in thought, but when Tobias appears in front of me I know it hasn't been that long.

"That was fast," I stand up and begin walking with him.

"Yep, quick and easy. Let's go see if they can take you early, there was cancellations here because of the snow, so maybe we can end up home early."

We walk over towards the general doctor's offices by following signs in the building. Eventually we make it to our destination and Tobias sits in the empty waiting room while I check in.

"Beatrice Prior," I know my files have not switched over to my married name here. The receptionist nods and says that they will be out in a minute to get me.

I haven't even sat down next to Tobias before Dr. Scott emerges from the door, smiling and embracing me.

We walk back to a room and she makes small talk that I barely hear.

I wasn't worried about this appointment until now.

She leads us back into a room and I sit up on the table.

"First I'm going to run some labs, and those should be done before you leave. Now you had talked to me on the phone when you made the appointment, you've been having a lot of nausea?"

I nod.

She goes ahead preparing all the tubes and begins to take the many viles of blood from my arm.

"Is that a ring I see on your finger there, Tris?" Marie gasps, resuming to take my blood.

"We just got married last month," I smile at her.

"Well, that's wonderful! Congratulations, you two!"

She finishes with the blood and puts some tape on my arm before leaving with the tubes and instructing me to free my leg from my jeans. I sit with one leg in my pants and my left leg bare on the table, the cold making the pain radiate more than usual.

Tapping on the door, she returns with the ultrasound machine on a mobile cart.

"They said fifteen minutes on the blood, now let's see what's going on here. Where has the pain been?"

"Everywhere, but mainly here," I point to the general area where the knife once sank into the flesh of my leg.

She squirts a gel over my leg that I never feel because of the damage in my leg.

She sighs as she begins running the wand over my leg, clear images of muscle running over the monitor.

"Shit," she curses under her breath and I've seen enough ultrasounds of my leg to know what she's looking at.

"It tore," I comment.

"Just a little, barely actually," she clicks on the keypad, documenting the images.

"Right there," she points to a break in the picture. "It's small, but it's there, and it's causing you pain. I think it may be alright but the problem is that it is swelling massively. Have you been on your feet a lot lately?"

I nod, thinking about how aggressively I was pacing the other day.

Tobias takes my hand in his, probably noticing my distress. He rubs his thumb over the back of my hand soothingly while I blink back tears.

She continues to move the scan over my leg, checking all the other places I've had trouble before.

"It's all looking great, except for that one spot. Now—" she is interrupted by a bing sound on her laptop.

"I want to do another ultrasound of your leg in three weeks, and I want you to keep it up as much as possible. The small tear could end up not being a problem, because it is in the middle of the muscle. I want to see that swelling go down, and if your pain gets any worse or intolerable, call me and go back on your crutches. The main goal here is not to send you into surgery."

I nod, my head spinning.

Go away, damn nausea.

Removing the wand and giving me a towel to wipe the gel, she turns off the ultrasound and clicks on her laptop for a few moments.

"Your bloodwork looks fine, Tris. Really great, actually. All your levels look good," she speaks while not looking up from her computer. "And, well, I don't know if I'm suppose to be the one telling you this, but some of your levels are high enough for me to confidently say that you're pregnant, Tris."

My face is numb.

I see Tobias cover his mouth in my peripheral vision, but my head is swimming.

"How?" I barely hear my voice.

"Well, I can get an OB in here to look—"

"I was stuck under a pipe, which was stuck under a rock," I start hysterically laughing. "How could a baby survive that?"

"You two talk for a second, I'm going to get an OB down here and see if they can take a look."

She walks out of the room and finally I turn to Tobias, still finding myself laughing.

His face is bright, and I have never seen him look like this.

"How long ago did we?" He begins laughing with me.

"The night of the attack," I take some breaths, calming down.

"That was over two months ago," he comments.

There's a tap on the door and another woman emerges alongside Dr. Scott.

She introduces herself but I'm barely listening.

"If you could lean back and lift up your shirt to below your bra, that would be great."

"I can't believe this," I say so Tobias can barely hear as I do what the doctor asks, my stomach bare as I lay on my back.

I look and notice that Dr. Scott left the room, probably having other patients to see.

The doctor ignores the speckled purple aging bruise when she looks towards my abdomen and moves the cart that the ultrasound machine is on.

"Can you both see?" She motions to the screen as she turns it on. I look to Tobias and he nods, his eyes shifting from my eyes, to the screen, then to my abdomen.

"This will be cold," the doctor warns, squirting some of the gel on my stomach. Unlike when on my leg, I feel the gel and it's temperature and it makes me uncomfortable. Taking the wand, she presses it into my abdomen.

Eyes glued to the screen, I see nothing. I look down and see the wand pressing into my abdomen just below my bellybutton. My skin and abs dip under the pressure of the wand and it's not comfortable.

I inhale and look back up to the screen, my heart racing.

"Is that the baby?" Tobias suddenly changes his grip on my hand, his eyes not leaving the screen.

The doctor laughs and nods, "That's baby Eaton." She clicks on the keypad.

There's a small figure on the screen, the most recognizable thing being a small head and a small body.

"It's okay?" I feel strained. "The baby, it's okay?"

"Yes. You're not far along, but I think we may be able to find a heartbeat."

I look to Tobias and see his eyes glued to the screen. I smile at his face and he notices me looking at him. With his free hand he cups my face and I smile.

And then I hear it.
A faint but strong thud comes from the machine.
Our baby.

I look to Tobias, my hand over my mouth. I notice a tear slip down his cheek.

"That's our baby?" I ask, still unable to comprehend.

"Healthy and growing strong! It looks like you're ten weeks along," she says. "Would you like a picture?"

"Yes," Tobias says before I process everything she says.

"Healthy?" I ask again.

"Tris, the baby is okay," Tobias strokes my hair.

"But this bruise, the impact—"

"It all missed your uterus," the doctor says. "Your baby is lucky, and so are you. Everything looks great."

I feel dazed as we make our journey back home, the picture of our baby in Tobias's coat pocket.

We communicate in small touches the whole way home. And after greeting Indy upon entering our apartment, he begins to piece together our plastic Christmas tree.

I bend to move a box of ornaments before I remember that I can't.

I'm pregnant.

"Don't lift anything," Tobias warns, recalling what the OB at Erudite told me. I also make a mental note to call my OB in the compound locally later and make an appointment.

"I know."

I bend down and pat Indy on the head. He wags his tail, his big brown eyes looking up at me.

I go over and begin to help Tobias string the tree with gold beads. Together we put on dark red and gold colored glass balls. We still communicate in small intimate touches: his hand grazing my waist, my hand trailing down his arm, his hand loosely in mine.

We're both ecstatic.

"Plug it in, Tobias," I tell him.

"Wait," he leaves the room and returns quickly. Indy cocks his head at the sudden movement.

He places the ultrasound picture in the center of the tree, nestled around a few branches.

He then bends down and plugs in the tree, lights illuminating the living room.

Next year, it will be more than the two of us decorating the tree.

I press my lips to his when he stands, passion taking us over.

He is first to speak when we separate.

"Perfect."