Chapter 42 - Home

— Tris

I wake up in my old bed; the bed I spent sixteen years waking up in before I made the life changing choice to transfer factions.

Sixteen years, and yet, it seems so awkward waking up here in my bed again.

I blink a few times, noticing my mother standing in the doorframe.

"You're getting picked up in an hour," she reminds me, walking over to sit on the foot of my bed.

"Now who is this coming to get you?" She asks, constantly interested in my friends.

"Amar, he's the second guy who found me with Zeke after the blast in the Pire. He's the one who brought me to the infirmary."

My mother nods and I continue.

"He and his husband, George are really close with Tobias and I. Amar was Tobias's instructor during initiation and then long story short he ended up at the Bureau," I sit up in bed stretching. "And then I met him there when I ended up there, and he came back to the city in the following years."

My mother begins to ask a question when I get the familiar nausea I do every morning now. Slipping my legs from under the bed sheets I quickly move to the bathroom.

The nausea is worse this morning compared to usual. I heave into the toilet and I worry that the force will cause me to puke blood.

It doesn't, but I still worry.

My mother is right next to me on the ground as I hover over the toilet. Her hand soothingly moves along the top of my head.

I'm not sure how long the action goes on until my stomach finally calms and I lean back against the tub where I showered yesterday.

My mother is next to me again with a cool cloth wiping my face, concern clear across her own face.

I wince, the familiar feeling of pain in my left leg stinging from the center of my calf. My hand moves to rub it, but the second my fingers make contact with the skin the stinging turns to a deep ache.

"They have Erudite doctors in Dauntless until the end of next month to help with all the injuries. Beatrice, promise me you will get checked out this week when you go home and make sure this bruise isn't causing you the nausea and pain. I know they did tests and x-rays, but I still worry that it hit your intestines or something to cause this," she shows her concern looking me dead in the eyes.

"Alright," I nod beginning to stand. "Alright," I say again once I am on my feet. I flex my ankle, trying to make the pain in my leg subside but it just won't quit.

I spend the next moments getting dressed slowly in my room. It is monumental because I am able to slowly, and painfully do it by my self.

"Honey, he's here." My mother calls up the stairs, probably much louder than for my father's liking.

I hear talking among my mother, father and Amar when the door opens. I can't make out what they're saying as I struggle to listen in. I collect the frames on my dresser and add them to the top of the bag on top of the clothes.

I stand over my bed and mess around with the bag Shauna brought me.

"Tris."

I turn, snapping my head around to see my friend.

How did I not hear him come up the stairs?

He comes over and wraps his arms around me and mine end up around his torso. The tightness of his hold is painful on my bruise, but I don't care enough about the pain to push him away.

At any other occasion this hug would've been uncomfortably and awkwardly lengthy for the two of us, but in the present neither is willing to release the other's embrace.

"Thank you, for everything," I whisper, my head barely tall enough to reach his chest in the embrace.

"I'm just glad you're safe and okay. They took you from me and said they were taking you to get medical attention. I started refusing to leave your side and then they restrained me before arresting you, unconscious you, right in front of me. My god, Tris, I'm so glad you're safe."

Every time I'm around Amar I see more and more clearly why Tobias, a man who trusts basically no one, chose to confide in Amar at such a crucial time in his life.

Amar is like a father figure, but with the bond of a friendship bond.

I'm so grateful to have the chance to confide in him as well.

"What's your injuries?" He says the second we finally break the embrace. He holds me by my shoulders, scanning my face. He eyes the stitches down my jawline and the bruise below my eye.

Sometimes he's too much of a father figure.

"Bad bruising to the area just below my ribs around my belly button. I would show you but I still have them bandaged for protection."

"Your leg?"

"Amity said it was fine, but I don't believe them. The pain just managed to get worse today."

He lightly groans in frustration.

"Let's get you out of here," his eyes show almost sorrow for some reason I am not sure of. "We can talk more in the truck back home. Chris has been worried sick about you."

My heart pangs for a moment, remembering that she hasn't replied to my texts, nor did she come to visit me along with Shauna and Zeke. She had part in the frames, but the least she could have done was texted me back.

I push the thought aside when Amar speaks again.

"So am I carrying you down or are you hurting yourself again before you even leave Abnegation?"

"How am I expected to do all the stairs in the compound if I can't do the ones here?"

"Slowly, but only once your home. Here," he takes the bag from me that Shauna brought and swings it over his shoulder. I chuckle at how tiny it looks on his huge form.

Taking me in his arms he carries me from my old room down the hallway and down the stairs. He lets me down at the bottom and I grip his arm as I feel myself grow dizzy from the growing pain in my leg.

"Hey, you alright?" He checks in with me holding my arm.

"Yeah," I slowly regain my composure and release my grip on him. My parents emerge from the kitchen, and our bid goodbye is quick.

I already was visited by my father last night, for he wasn't sure if he would have off of work today, and I said goodbye to my mother earlier this morning as we talked while I packed my few belongings.

He helps me into the passengers side of the old truck he took to Abnegation, setting my bag at me feet before closing the door and getting behind the wheel at the drivers side. With a roar, the truck starts after he turns the key and we make our way through the Abnegation neighborhood.

"I'm scared to ask," I say, knowing he'll know what I mean.

"George is hanging in there, he was in a coma for a little while, but he hasn't been talking much. He's recalling names, and I'm pretty sure he knows who everyone is and who he is, but I think he's just struggling from utter exhaustion more than anything. He got such a bad blow to the head," his voice drifts off as he rambles. "He's lucky all he really has is mild confusion," he finishes.

I nod, glad but worried to hear the news.

We sit in silence for a solid ten minutes as the truck bumps along the old roads of the city.

"I saw Four yesterday. They're releasing him from Erudite Med soon, probably sooner than later, he doesn't make a good patient," Amar chuckles, moving his eyes from the road quick to glance at me smiling and most likely checking on me.

There's still a deep sorrow in his eyes, even when he laughs lightly and smiles.

"How are the ambassadors?" I ask, my voice quiet.

I found the source to the sorrow in his eyes.

"Just, prepare yourself for it. It's not the same group of ambassadors right now that we are all use to," He says quiet.

I swallow, resting my arm on the window.

"The explosion wasn't caused by the New York people." He says out of the blue as we pull up to the compound entrance that goes directly to the main building.

"What?" I turn to him as he puts the truck in park.

"The Dauntless compound is deemed a no smoking area for a reason." He looks at me while he speaks for he is no longer driving. "

"The Pire is one of those places where the pipes and architecture cause a certain pressure in the air. One of the Dauntless members decided that no one would notice him light a cigarette during a lockdown and an attack, so he decided to light his lighter along the wall in the Pire and boom. The guy fell to his death, one of the three casualties of the whole attack, if you can even call it an attack when there is only coincidental casualties except for West's murder, which was just deemed from anger of being imprisoned."

"So the attack was officially deemed non-violent?"

He nods.

"I'll help you out," he takes off his seatbelt and exits the truck. Opening the door and taking my bag, he offers me two hands to step out of the truck. I hold onto his hands tightly for support as I step down.

He holds the door for me as I step into the mail building, my best friend being the first person to greet me with a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry I never visited. I've been so busy taking care of Rose, and I lost my phone in the attack. I left it in my locker and someone must have misplaced it," she holds me close, her height making me awkwardly level with her breast. I ignore the awkwardness, glad to hear she wasn't intentionally ignoring me for some reason.

"Hey, you've got to share her!" Marlene comes up and jokingly pushes Chris, hugging me for barely a fraction of the amount that Chris did.

I'm grateful for it though, my bruise burning from the pressure of Chris's hug. I smile almost shyly as I walk slowly towards the ambassador hallway, hearing Chris start a conversation with Amar behind me.

"Tris," I turn my head and smile when I see Evelyn standing away from the crowds of people. More than just me are returning to the compound today, and everyone is anxious to see their loved ones.

I'm oddly surprised when she holds me tight, her and I never showing much compassion for each other even though we are on very good terms considering our past.

"I've been worried sick," she whispers, her hand on the back of my head lightly. We separate and she holds my upper arms for a moment and I can see the relief in her eyes.

It's moments like these I'm glad that her and I made up.
It's nice knowing I'll always have a second mother around, someone who cares.

"I'll see you later," she releases me, smiling lightly as she turns and leaves the Main building all together.

Guess it's still as awkward for her as it is for me sometimes.

I continue to head towards my destination that I was going to before I ran into Evelyn.

There's no one hanging out in the ambassador hallway.

All of the doors are closed, few people working quietly while most are probably on medical leave.

Just five weeks ago we were playing baseball in this hallway.
My hand grazes my office door as I recall standing here to play third base.

Ian was the pitcher.

But now Ian is dead.

I sigh, pushing back tears.

Amar told me to prepare myself for this, but I didn't think the differentiation would pang my heart this badly.

It's just a hallway, Tris.
Yeah, a hallway that is always noisy and disruptive.
Again, just a hallway.
This is not the same ambassador hallway.

I'm surprised to find my office unlocked, considering I have no idea where my keys might be since the attack.

I flip on the light switch and it takes a minute before the light on the ceiling flickers to life.

I notice an envelope on my desk and I move agonizingly slow in pain over to my desk.

The envelope has my name on it.
The handwriting is so familiar to me, and I know exactly whose it is.

I know exactly what is in the envelope too. A deep dread fills my lower abdomen.

I was worried he would do this.

.

Surprise! Random Saturday update here for you!

Thanks so much for all the positive feedback on the first M Rated parallel over in, uh, well I made another book for them, but it doesn't have an abbreviated name yet...
AFY.MRPC?
Kinda catchy, huh? Haha I don't know... we will figure it out.
Anyways, there's more where that one parallel came from, so if you're interested in those kind of scenes please do go check it out!

16.5k reads!

Ugh I am loving writing this fanfic so much lately... it's like a honeymoon phase or something 😂 You guys are going to love these pre written chapters I have, they're really long in length too! I keep finding myself unable to stop writing, but I guess that's not a bad thing...

All the love,
Kat ❤️