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"Wait, wait wait -hold on- wait!" Alexia yelled, "You're telling me that you and Mark are in a fake relationship, and I slept with him while you were still in that fake relationship?"

Donghyuck nodded, "Yes"

"And so why am I here?" Alexia was confused. She didn't really understand the situation.

Seeing her confusion, Donghyuck quickly clarified. "I know you don't pay much attention to the news or to social media, but someone caught you and Mark walking into your apartment building. So now everybody thinks Mark is a cheater and that you'rea homewrecker."

"People are slandering you, Mark, and I without even knowing the real situation?"

"Unfortunately, that is true, Miss Amies," Taeyong chimed in. "We are hoping that you would be willing to help clear up this situation."

"Alex, I know this could put a lot of pressure on you and you might get a lot of hate, but please, unless we a third party, you, involved Mark and I can't really solve the dilemma..."

"I want to first see some articles and comments on the situation before getting myself involved," Alexia stated.

"That is completely understandable" Taeyong agreed, pulling his laptop towards himself, unlocking it, and then turning it towards the woman.

Alexia opened Google Chrome, typing in Mark NEO into the search engine and waiting for the pages to load.

Mark Lee Cheating on Donghyuck?!

By now, you've probably heard the distressing news:

Photos of Mark Lee entering an apartment building with an unknown woman have been making the rounds online, and they don't bode well for the future of Mark's relationship with actor Lee Donghyuck.

As incriminating as the situation might sound at first, there really is a reason to believe that there's nothing going on.

But don't tell that to the most obsessive Donghyuck fans, some of whom have been waiting for this moment since the moment the couple started dating.

"Mark is trash. Period," one fan tweeted over the weekend.

"MARK LEE HAS AND ALWAYS WILL BE AN ASSHOLE FOR CHEATING ON HIS BOYFRIEND!" another echoed.

We're guessing these people won't be dissuaded by the fact that Donghyuck doesn't seem to bear any ill will toward Mark or hasn't posted anything about it either.

And we imagine if you try to explain to these fans that there's no hard evidence of Mark's infidelity, you'll wind up on the receiving end of an all-caps tirade.

Alexia was glad that there were some people that weren't automatically jumping to conclusions. She hoped that all fans could be this understanding, but knew that they that would never happen.

She next moved onto social media.

@ringdingdonghyuck Gosh, I was actually considering being Mark's fan because his group has good music, but he cheated and that is not something I support.

@NEOgotmyback NEO just lost a fan because of Mark. I can't believe I thought this would be a perfect relationship

@beans I can't believe this bitch. She's a homewrecker and that's the tea, sis

@babyhyuck Fucking cheater. The world would be better without people like him.

Alexia slammed the laptop shut and pushed herself away from the table and out of her chair. She was livid.

She clenched her fists in determination and turned to the couple and the manager.

"I'll do it. Someone needs to show these people their place."

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Two Days Later

Donghyuck and Mark were, yet again, in the same conference room along with Taeyong and Alexa. This time, however, the rest of NEO was in the room as well.

"Okay, let's get this meeting started. We have a lot to do," Taetong started handing out papers to everyone.

"So this is Alexia," Taeyong pointed at the woman, "the lady that was in the picture with Mark. She has agreed to help us clear up this entire mess. Wh-"

"Okay," Lucas interrupted, "but what does this really have to do with us? Mark cheated, there's no way we can ever cover this up."

Taeyong turned to Lucas, " Good question, let me explain. Mark and Donghyuckwe're never in an actual relationship. It's all fake."

"Wait what?!"

"I knew something was fishy, but this?!"

Not surprised at the expected outrage, Taeyong calmly continued. "Please do not give any of the two of them hate. The relationship was kind of pressured and forced upon them. Donghyuck's Manager and I take the blame."

While saying this, Taeyong was pointedly staring at Jeno as if daring him to do something.

"Fucking knew it. Mark can never be in an actual relationship without something getting messed up. W-"

"Oh, piss off, you fucking imbecile. You know nothing!"

"Why! I ought t-"

Taeyong had enough. He slammed his hands on the table, shutting the two adult children up.

"Lee Jeno, I know you and Mark are not on good terms, but right now is not the time to start another argument! If you really need to say something to each other, you can take it outside!"

Mark and Jeno looked ashamed and quietly sat back down, "Sorry, please continue."

"As I was saying, this is Alexia, the girl in the picture with Mark."

Taeyong picked up a remote control from the table and turned to the projector on the wall. The picture appeared.

"It turns out, however, that Donghyuck and Alexia have known each other for about 4 years and are actually quite close to each other."

Taeyang pressed another button on the remote. Another picture appeared. This one was of Donghyuck and Alexia; it seemed as if they were at some camp.

"The fiends have gonna on many mission trips together and love hanging out and doing service work together."

Another picture appeared. This time a selfie.

"We can use this to our advantage. We can say something along the lines of Mark already knowing Alexia because he had met her through Donghyuck."

Taeyong yet again pressed another button, this time a video popping up on the screen.

"This is a CCTV clip from the night this event unfolded. Mark revealed to me that he had actually stopped in front of a grocery store that was across the street from a bar. That was where he saw Alexia struggling with her shopping bags and offered to help her. The rest followed from there."

Taeyong continued speaking as the video played. It seemed that everyone was catching on based on their facial expressions.

"This is where we can fix the problem. We can say that Mark drove to this grocery store to buy ice. It's a 24/7 grocery store so it works time-wise. As Mark walked towards the entrance of the shop, he noticed a lady struggling with her bags; he recognized her as Donghyuck's good friend, Alexia, and offered to help her with her bags. After doing that, he then left her apartment and went to buy ice himself."

Taeyong was finished now and turned to his audience. Donghyuck was the first to speak up.

"Does this photographer that took the photos of Mark entering the apartment have any more photos, maybe of him exiting the building in the morning?"

"No, I checked the security footage of the apartment building and the person who took the pictures -whos was hiding behind a bush, by the way, very classic move- left a few minutes after the Mark and Alexia entered the building."

Taeyong yet again turned to his audience of six, waiting for more questions. This time it Jaehyun to ask a question.

"There is one problem I can see. If Mark went back to the store, shouldn't we have proof of that as well?"

"That is the only foreseeable problem. The only way we can fix this is if we forge some pictures or something..."

That answer seemed to make everyone just a little bit nervous.

"Anyways, Alexia has agreed to do a social media post clarifying the situation after the company makes one. After that, we just have to sit tight and then wait for the reactions. Depending on them we can formulate the rest of our plan."

There was a chorus of agreements from the rest of the people in the room.

"Meeting adjourned, everyone. You may leave now."

Everyone slowly grabbed their things and walked towards the door.

"Wait, Alexia, Donghyuck, and Mark! Can you guys stay back for a little bit?"

As the couple and the lady stayed back, Lucas, Jeno, and Jaehyun were already out the door and in the hallway.

As they walked towards the exit, Jaehyun thought he had glimpsed a blur of a person with purple hair rush around the corner.

Jaehyun stopped, his breath caught in his throat.

It couldn't be ...it was so long ago.

Jaehyun shook his head and headed to the company's car with a heavy and aching heart.

"Why can't I tell people that I'm in love with you?" the lavender-haired asked quietly enough that the silence that now reigned in the room was barely disturbed. "I've lived a put-on life for the past six years and I don't want to do that anymore. I just want to be me. You make me, me. And now you want me to hide that. You want me to live like I'm doing something wrong by loving you!"

Jaehyun didn't answer him. He just turned and walked towards the floor-to-ceiling windows and looked out into the dark night. They were in the middle of the city but there were very few lights shining against the inky sky.

It felt lonely and somber.

Maybe that had something to do with the time of night it was, or maybe the world around them was mimicking their relationship, the place they seemed to have fallen into and had no idea how to get out of.

"Am I?" the man asked, once again breaking a silence that seemed to rule too long between two people who were supposed to be in love and in tune with one another. Äm I doing something wrong by loving you?"

Jaehyundidn't turn around still. He just stood at the window, contemplating the night and what the darkness that seemed to engulf the city symbolized.

"Did I make a mistake thinking that we're in this together? Do you even love me?" the lavender-haired asked.

Right at that moment a light, Jaehyun had found to focus on in the dark cityscape, went off. Switched off no doubt by its retiring occupant. It didn't mean anything, or at least it wasn't supposed to but it felt analogical to what was happening in their hotel room.

It felt like a parallel he didn't want to acknowledge just yet. He turned around then, to look at the older male who was mopping up a rogue tear with the sleeve of his Henley top.

"Why won't you say anything, Jae?" the man asked him, frustration straining the sadness in his voice.

"Because nothing I say will heal this," Jaehyun finally spoke up.

"What are you saying?"

"You want things from me that I just can't give you, bunny. I know you're not ready for everything that you come with," Jaeehyun confessed gravely.

"But I knew," the man said, more to himself than Jaehyun, "I knew coming into this - into us - that you came with all of this," he said, gesturing to the hotel room but meaning a whole lot more than just that.

Jaehyun knew what he was referring to.

The lavender-haired was referring to the camera flashes and the shouting voices that accompanied Jaehyun wherever he went. He was talking about the tabloid columns that speculated about and sensationalized his every move and the millions of fans that lapped it up. He was talking about the life of a world-famous singer and band member.

And Jaehyun knew his lover was right, the male had known going into their relationship that Jaehyun came with all of that.

The lavender-haired had even convinced himself, somehow, that he could handle it because he wanted Jaehyun that much.

That hadn't changed.

The ache in his chest told him that he loved Jaehyun just as much as he had that first day the singer had serenaded him during a soundcheck for one of his shows, possibly even more at that moment.

Jaehyun had a lot to lose if they went public with their relationship. He could lose his family.

They would never understand it. They would never accept that it was love between him and his baby. As far as anyone in his hometown was concerned, a man could never love a man in the way that Jaehyun loved his Hyung.

It was haram, it was wrong and it was unnatural. An abomination of a coupling that they would never acknowledge.

Jaehyun had tried to fight himself and the crushes he would have on men. It had worked for the most part, that is until the lavender-haired had come into his life.

He was a whirlwind of crinkle-eyed smiles, happiness, and carefreeness that Jaehyun had never experienced in his guarded life. He had tried to fight it, but the older male was too strong a force to fight and he'd given in to the need to love and be loved in the way that he had deprived himself of for so long.

And now there Jaehyun stood, devastated to the point of numbness because he had to make a choice.

He had to choose between hurting the person who had embedded himself so deeply in Jaehyun's heart in a short time or losing the people he had known and loved his entire life.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry," Jaehyun whispered into the deadened night.

"We don't have to come out," the lavender-haired pleaded, already knowing what Jaehyun's words were alluding to.

The dread was beginning to pool in his stomach and his heart was beginning to ache like a hot poker had been stuck through it.

"I'll let it go. We can go back to the way we were. I'll accept it, I swear."

"It's not fair though, bunny. I can't expect that of you. I can't put all of my baggage on you and expect us to work. You already have enough to handle with the entire world coming for you just because you're you and so beautiful and talented. Your career is also taking off as a model," Jaehyun almost choked on that admission.

"I won't let you have to carry my burdens and worry about having to hide my secret for me too. You deserve more than that," he said. "

You deserve the world and happiness. You and I don't deserve to have to pretend to be dating someone else just to keep people from speculating about us. You don't deserve the life of a dirty secret and you should never let anyone reduce you to that. Not even me. You deserve so much more than that."

There was a beat of silence as the words sank in.

"You need someone who will be brave enough to stand by your side and proudly hold your hand while those flashes go off and not give a damn, someone who will kiss you on the street and tell the world how amazing you are and how lucky they are to have you. I won't ever be able to do that, Hyung baby. I can't do that."

"I love you," it was a plea more than a statement from the lavender-haired.

Everything he had felt in the past year and a half that they'd been together felt like it had been compressed to fit into those three little words. Jaehyun had not known that a sentence could feel so heavy, but this one did. It carried everything that they were together and for each other over the past 18 months and now it also carried the weight of their demise.

That's what that moment was, he was ready to admit it now. It was the end of what he had wanted to be the rest of his life.

"I'll always love you, baby, always. I just can't be the person you deserve."

A choked sob broke through the room and shook the air. The sound hit Jaehyun so hard it felt like the ground beneath him was vibrating from the pain.

The lavender-haired had dropped into the couch in the center of the room and was now sobbing painfully and it was Jaehyun's fault. He had broken the heart he had sworn to himself to protect because he was selfish and a coward.

He wanted to speak, to apologize and reassure his baby but the lump stuck in his throat wouldn't let the words through. They were caught in his chest, lost in the dull throb of his heart.

He turned to leave, his suitcase already waiting for him in a car downstairs, ready to take the redeye back to reality. The fairy-tale had ended, but unlike the others, theirs didn't end with a "happily ever after".

He was at the door when the sniffles stopped and the words, "You're a liar!" were hurled at him.

"You promised you wouldn't hurt me. You're hurting me, Jaehyun! You're killing me!" the older cried, another sob breaking his words.

Jaehyun's hand stilled on the shiny brass handle, his knees feeling weak from the razor-sharp words. It felt like his body had suddenly become too much for his legs to carry, like the only reason he was still upright and not crumpling to the floor from the crippling weight of what was happening, was his pale knuckled grip on the doorknob.

"Look at me, Jaehyun!" the lavender-haired almost shouted in his enraged grief.

Jaehyun shook his head, unsure if it was in response to his lover's words or to the tears that had finally begun to find their way out his eyes.

He couldn't stay any longer.

Every second he spent listening to his Hyung's sobs and feeling the pain that emanated from the room, was a second he started doubting himself, and doubting the decision he had told himself was the right one to make.

So without another word or even a glance back at the love of his life, he twisted the doorknob and made his way out on shaky legs. As he pulled the door shut behind him he heard one last

"I won't forgive you if you leave me like this," a desperate plea from a breaking heart.

He closed the door and walked away anyway, a constant chant of, "I'll never forgive myself," resounding in his head as the elevator doors closed on his heart.

Not Edited

Saturday, December 14, 2019

I hate myself and I have exams next week...

Song Recommendation:

"Coming Home" by NCT U