The air of the outside world is cold and frigid as I must have been when I knew myself. Who I am now is not who I was then. Perhaps I am reverting to my old ways of which I do not know of yet somehow managed to return to. Maybe people really can't change, even if they've been completely wiped. It's happened before, the fighting and the affairs. I can't remember how or when but I am sure of it. I did it again without even realizing I was repeating the past. Now that I sit looking out into the city with my companion on my lap and I think of how horrible I must have been. 

"Was I terrible Holly?" I ask the ball of fur curled up on my lap. I'm sure he's sleeping so he won't answer. He might be a speechless animal but he'd find his way to tell me otherwise and since he doesn't maybe my conclusion is true. Maybe I just am becoming who I use to be. 

One thing clicks with another as it has been since I've awoken and I figure things out. I haven't minded it until now. Learning things about my old self I always found fun but this has not been one of them. Memories of late night bonfires with friends and family moments are ones I cherish the recalling of but being someone who hurts others is not. 

The ringing of my phone interrupts my moment of reevaluation. 

"I found it."

The three words are like music to my ears in the early morning in which the sun has yet peek into the new day. I scramble up from the seat on my balcony, my pup falls right off me in hurry as well. I rush to the apartment building I was summoned to, I am met with a familiar but tired face. 

"He woke you up too?" Mark questions after his yawn. Unlike me, he was in his pajamas, clearly he had been pulled out of bed for this. 

"No, I couldn't sleep."

We arrive up to the floor of Jooheon's apartment, he waits for us out in the hallway. When he sees us, his arm shoots up to wave at us. In his other hand I notice a paper, perhaps what we've been searching for so long. I snatch it from his hand, Mark peers over my shoulders as I begin to read from the paper. 

"Here, I Lee Jooheon am documenting the very purpose I have created this journal. If anything is to happen to me, or anyone on our team, here is this entry to explain part of what only some can.'' Part...what the hell!? You said you found it!" 

I hit Jooheon with the paper while Mark does the same but with his hand. We had been told the whole experiment was supposedly written down but this only says part! Oh he's really done it now.

"I had to wake up Jackson to get here! Do you know how angry he gets when he's sleep deprived! DO YOU HEON!?" 

As Mark has his go at hitting Jooheon, I am forced to stand aside so no contact is made with my skin. While they kill each other I continue on to read what is only part of the answer we were hoping for. 

"'The reason being is because what we are doing is not supported and so we cannot risk of our words falling into the wrong hands...connect the journals and you'll have you answer. I Lee Jooheon am number four and all I have to say is, the drug did not react well in the first trial.'.."

The fighting stops as the words I have read process in our heads. 

"We need all the journals..." 

In order to figure out this whole thing we need the writing of all the people who have written for it. All the words of the names of the paper which belong to the team of the experiments. 

"It took so long to find this paper!" Mark screams outraged by the revelation. "This'll be impossible! That's it! I'm done!"

Mark turns his heal and starts marching down the hallway but we don't stop them. He has all the right to be angered, outraged and practically over it. I don't blame him and neither does Jooheon because he's in the right. 

This is impossible. 

~'~'~'

Bit of a short chapter oopsies 

Hope you enjoyed! 

{Ciel1l}