"We all live with the objective of being happy, our lives are all different and yet the same"

~Anne Frank.

* * *

The sound of a car screeching was heard from a distance further up the road where we were headed towards. My sister, Amalia and I, Dominika, had taken a walk with our mother down the boulevard from our house. We ignored the noise, continuing our journey along the street while chatting our way through the lovely evening.

In that welcome amber glow the time of slower thoughts has arrived. Those moments when with open eyes my brain becomes as a perfect empty horizon, seeing, yet content to sit. I feel the soothing breeze become absorbed in the music of crickets, letting the gentle energy of nature wash in.

A police officer passed by eating a donut and waved at us with a warming smile, which we generously returned.

"Who wants to play tag in these empty streets?" My good mother spoke.

"Oh I certainly do, Mother," my sister and I both chanted in our native British accents even though we are Polish by code of birth.

We giggled, strolling over to the other side and waited as she began counting to five to catch us.

'1'

'2'

'3'

'4'

'5'

The moment she reached five, that's when it all happened at the blink of an eye. Running towards us from her side of the street the car that recalled the noise happened to be heading towards her direction with full speed.

"Look out!" Amalia yelled in fright as we both watched the petrifying scene occur before our eyes.

The large black van ran over her making her body roll above the vehicle, landing hard onto the solid concrete ground.

"NO!" I screamed in disbelief and terror, rushing to where her body lay in dismay. Amalia running towards the police man who was still near in sight. The tears blurred my vision, waves of utter incredulity stirred through my body while I tried to believe this was not just a dream. Seeing my mother on the ground completely helpless, empty, and broken was all a hurricane too massive to take in. No matter what I'll do to move on from this pain, deep down I'll always know that I'll never get to hug my mum again.

"Mother! Mother! Somebody please help us!" I cried, hot tears rolling down my face. Holding slight of her upper body in my arms, I let out small sobs.

"Please don't do this to me," I sniffed, "stay with us and help me because I won't be strong without you." I whimpered loudly.

"Dominika." She coughed, her eyes void of any emotion. Clothes drenched in blood, while some drooled out her mouth and down her lip.

"Remember these words for you should keep them in mind as you grow. For as long as you feel pain, you're still alive. As long as you make mistakes, you are still human. And as long as you keep trying, there's still hope. I will always be with you and your sister...my love," she whispered the last part as it was barely audible before she lost breath and died in my arms.

"No! No! No! Please don't leave me!" I shattered in tears, crying my heart and soul out.

______________

{6 years later}

Beep! beep! beep!

I wake up to the beeping of my alarm clock early in the morning. Getting out of my warm sheets, I walk over to where the sun is shining bright and open my cream white curtains. It had been 6 years since my mother died in that accident and it was surprising how time had elapsed so fast, things weren't the same without her around and Father certainly knew how difficult it was for me. He did put his best in making me feel happy always. I spread the sheets over my bed neatly and go into the bathroom.

There was only one thing I always felt no matter what and perhaps it might cling to me, grief.

I had my own motion of grief. I thought it was a sad time that followed the death of someone you love. And you had to push through it to get to the other side. But I'm learning there is no other side. There is no pushing through. But rather, there is absorption, adjustment and acceptance.

And grief is not something that you complete. But rather you endure. Grief is not a task to finish and move on, but an element of yourself- An alteration of your being. A new way of seeing, a new beginning of self...

After a long shower I got dressed into my black jeans, a cream tank and some converses to match with. I grab my phone off the charge and put it into my back pocket. Moments later as I'm getting all my things ready I hear a knock at the door.

"It's open," I say.

"Hey, I just wanted to make sure you were ready," Amalia said with a smile whilst entering my room. "Dad said Grandma Candace will be here any moment to pick us up," I simply nodded in reply.

"You know, it's not fair Father gave you the biggest room from mine!" She complains. Typical Amalia.

"That's because I'm way tidier than you will ever be," I gushed, sticking my tongue out in the process.

"Whatever!" She said clicking her tongue and rolled her eyes, before walking back out my room.

I take both suitcases in hand and carry them to the door when a cool breeze brings me to a stop. Turning my back around, I see the open window and go to close it then walk out and close my room shut. When I make it out into the yard, I politely greet my grandmother who's speaking in polish to my father. Their resemblance is quiet the same, my dad has blond hair which is very uncommon from our kind, piercing gray eyes and a tall frame of 6'2. While on the other hand, Grandma Candace has all the same features excluding height which was 5'7. She wore a pair of blue jeans, a white long sleeved sweater topped by a red sweater vest and a pair of royal blue suedette pointed pumps.

"Obiecuję, że zaopiekuję się nimi," Grandma Candace said, looking between Amalia and I.

[I promise you I'll take extra good care of them.]

"Dziękuję mamo, wierzę, że zdrowo będzie zostawić za sobą przeszłość," Father replies with sigh.

[Thank you mum, I believe it will be healthy for them to put there pasts behind.]

I reach a decision to avoid eaves dropping on their conversation even though I barely understand a word and take my suitcases and load them into the trunk of her black SUV along with the others.

My eyes scan the neighbourhood for a good moment. I let my hands hold onto the walls of our house, these brick walls have been my cocoon for the years I needed their sanctuary, and I thank them. My eyes wander their rugged clay surface, their rosy colour bright yet earthen. My hands feel the warmth of sun, imparted to them yet given back with a steady determination. Leaving home was never going to be easy, yet I take these emotions with me, these memories of comfort and joy. Hoping for a fresh start away from her.

***

"Bye father, we'll make sure to call every weekend," I yell as the car began to speed off into distance.

"Love you guys," he replied with a smile and waved us off. This was it we were moving in with our grandma because the high school we applied for was too far from home, also because grandma Candace needed someone to look after my cousins when she was away.

We had gone to another side of Naywood, far from the local cabin like houses we live in and into the main streets which were filled with large houses like mansions. Grandma was loaded if I must say. She never told us what she did though, I think I'll ask her later.

"Here we are girls, your new home. Make yourselves feel welcome," Grandma Candace said with a warming smile which went from ear to ear.

"Shut up! This is your house?!" Amalia gasped, gazing upon the huge house in front of us.

"Yes. Of course it is," she chuckled.

"Thanks grandma Candace for letting us stay with you," I smile.

"Please, call me nana or whatever you please," she laughed, her attitude beaming with ecstasy.

"So which room is mine nana candy?" Amalia squirmed.

"The choice is yours," she said with a wide grin.

"Oh yeah!" Amalia cheered. "I'm having a big room this time." She ran up the huge stairs.

I rolled my eyes at her playfulness.

I finally paid attention to my surroundings and admired the view. The trees gave enough shade and the light glistened throughout the area.

Coming into the house was breathtaking. The interior was even more ravishing, the huge crystal chandeliers were hanging above in the center on the living room just before the staircase. The wallpapers are of Amglo-Japanese design with Roman and Greek themes in the frieze on the ceilings and walls. The predominant colors are dark with tan and gold highlights, creating an interesting contrast to the walls. Off the main hallway, to the right is a small sitting room. The fireplace, situated on the interior wall facing east was piled perfectly and perfined.

Long story short, It was all gorgeous and unique. I sure did fancy her taste.

Once I had chosen the room with big walls painted in cream white, I grabbed a random book from one of my suitcases then settled out upon the balcony and sat on the sofa by the edge. I could see other houses from here including the one next to nana candy's house.

Straight ahead from my balcony I happened to gaze upon a guy about my age in only a pair of shorts lie on the hammock by his balcony. It took a few moments until he finally administered my presence and looked at me.

I gasped.