Aishwarya POV

"He did that?"

I asked with the shock and Jiji nodded with the smile.

"Not just that but a lot of things too,"

She said and I could feel my eyes widening with the each of the thing Jiji was telling me. I mean, how could she even let him do that.

"It was not uncomfortable?"

I asked and she shook her head.

"No, I mean if it would be uncomfortable doing with your lover who is your husband and who is your everything then who will be it comfortable with?"

She asked and I inhaled a deep breath.

"But, still I do not understand the right reason for doing that. I mean, could not be love without it?"

I asked and she smiled.

"Of course, it can be, Aishwarya. It's everyones' personal choice of how much he or she wants it. And, you should never let your partner force you to do anything you do not want him to do. I mean, I am sure if you will ask Devarsa to not do it, he would not do it,"

She said and I inhaled a deep breath.

"But, what if he wants to do it?"

I asked and she thinned her brows.

"How do you know? He told you?"

She asked and I shook my head.

"Not directly but I could sense,"

I said.

"How?"

She asked.

"I mean he kisses me, my neck and... he also... you know sucked me... down there a few times,"

I tried to say in my slow and shaky voice and she sucked on her lower lip.

"I think, he is just trying to make you comfortable with him. I mean, did he ever force you to do anything?"

She asked and I immediately shook my head.

"No, never,"

I said and she smiled.

"Then, you should not worry but I want to know something, Aishwarya,"

She said and I nodded.

"Ji,"

She looked sharply in my eyes and eyes.

"There is a difference between not wanting to do it and not liking to do it? What's with you?"

She asked and I thinned my brows.

"It's same, Jiji,"

I tried to say and she shook her head.

"No, that's two entirely different thing. Not wanting means you do not want now and it could be due to many reasons, like you are not ready, you are not comfortable, you are not willing to do that yet but not liking means, you are not liking his touch, you are liking him to kiss you or anything that will eventually lead that to it,"

She explained and I gulped nervously and ran my thoughts deeper to comprehend.

"How do I know if I do not like or I do not want?"

I asked and she inhaled a deep breath.

"Do you like him being close to you?"

She asked and I nodded.

"Yes, I want him to be close to me all the time,"

I said and she asked further.

"Do you like his touch like holding your hand, kissing you, touching you on the different places of your body and yes, sucking you down there?"

She asked and I blinked nervously and tried to say in a slow voice.

"I cannot deny that I like it. I mean, yes I like him holding my hand, kissing my lips, cheeks and neck lovingly and I even like him touching different places on my body along with the fact that it makes me feel excited, nervous and thrilled too,"

I said and she smiled.

"That's good, that means you like him but you are not ready yet,"

She said and I thinned my brows.

"Jiji, how will I know that I am ready?"

I asked and she smiled looking at me.

"Your body will tell you,"

She said and I did not understand.

"How did you know that you want it?"

I asked and she inhaled deeply.

"Well, when you have right person with you, and when his thoughts started to cloud your brain and when you think that your life is empty without and when you think that after him you do not want anyone. That's how you know,"

She said and I bit on my lower lip.

"How to know if he is the right person for you?"

I asked and she lowered her gaze for a moment.

"First, you will know in your gut that if he is right for you or not. And, second just imagine him sitting next to you when you are old and cannot even walk or sleep properly. Imagine, how he will talk to you. And, its good to discuss what will you two talk when you will be old when all the things for the life are done, when you both are free with the responsibilities and when nothing more is needed to be done. If you two cannot reach that point in your imagination and share it, I do not think its right,"

She said and I nodded.

And, for my surprise Hukum had never discussed with me something like that. But, why?

"Ranisa,"

Suddenly, the voice of an attendee caught our attention and Jiji looked up at her.

"Ji,"

She asked and the attendee informed.

"Ranaji is asking for you,"

She said and Jiji looked at me.

"I will be back, Aishwarya,"

She said and I shook my head.

"It's okay, we will meet tomorrow now,"

I said and she smiled.

"Good night,"

She said and I nodded.

We did not realise that it turned late evening while talking this much but I felt so contended after talking to her.

I mean, in my whole life, no one had ever talked to me this much. Not even Hukum, yet. 

I felt so happy and light all of sudden.

But, still the fact that Hukum and I would be doing that someday was making me feel my stomach twisted and my brain oozed up.

The mere imagination of him being naked in front of me and I being naked in front of him, him coming closer to me, and pushing it in was making me feel sick and thrilled already.

I asked Moni to sleep with me because I was missing him.

The day ended on a good note and next day we begin with the preparation of designs and I started my classes too. My master was really a sweet and helpful lady. She was ready to give me extra time and already started teaching me how to write letters and words.

She also started to teach me how to read letters.

I was not missing him in the day much but definitely the thoughts of him were clouding my brain in the night.

But, everyone was there to help me, talk to me and not letting me miss him. Especially, Jiji, Moni, my master and our team.

The first three weeks were spent in finalising the designs and we hired the workers to make the copies of my designs. Initially I began with the fifteen designs and asked them to make as much as copies they could make in different colours and slightly different patterns too. I started reading a little bit too. 

Suddenly, my life was feeling blissful and happy. Suddenly, I was important to people, suddenly my suggestions started to matter and suddenly I started to feel like I existed.

And, I was dying to tell everything to Hukum. I mean, I wanted to tell him everything. EVERYTHING.

When the production ended, we begin with the launch in the market. I was missing him even more. I wanted him to be with me and see me and hold me if anything does wrong.

But, Devarsa arrived later that night and told me that he would personally take care of everything. So, I was less burdened now.

Everyone was there to praise me and appreciate me.

And, finally the day came when we were all set to launch the first one hundred fifty designs in the local markets.

The shopkeepers only took a few pieces because they were also unsure of bringing anything new in the shop.

I prayed to the God for everything to be well.

Only, two weeks had left for Hukum to arrive and I was suddenly feeling happier and contended for no reason.

My whole day were passing in meetings, discussions and everything that were going on.

My classes were also going well and I had started reading. But, there was a whole kingdom to improve because I was still unabated to read long words.

Another week passed and we heard that first fifty were sold. I was not that impressed but Jiji told me that it will take time for the people to adjust to the new taste and things.

And, we had already started working on the get together thing and for that I thought of only making five extravagant designs keeping in mind the myths and cultures of the different Kingdoms, highlighting the things that were good omen for them.

Another five days had passed and I thought of cleaning the chamber because only two to three days had left for Hukum to come back. I was so excited and I was dying to see him. I just wanted to hug him tightly and say how much I was missing him.

"Moni,"

I called her to help me cleaning the chamber and she called other attendees too.

We begin with the bathing room, followed by the dressing room, then the meeting and resting area. We trimmed the plats and grass too. And, at last I begin with the bedroom.

After doing the bed and few trunks, I walked to his Almirah and opened it. Everything was reminding me of him. I looked at the books, the scrolls and everything belonging to him.

There was a wide smile on my face as I pulled out his books one by one and started to clean them. I opened a random one and read a few excerpts. They were mainly political and economical and histories of Kingdoms.

And, after finishing with the books, I took out the scrolls to clean.

But, suddenly they all fell and I sighed with frustration.

I sat down started to collect them but suddenly my sight fell on a yellow coloured letter, half open and the stamp of Songarh visible on it.

"S..on...ga..rh,"

I tried to read again and yes it read Songarh.

I thinned my brows and took the letter in my hand. Unrolling it completely I looked at the letter written on it.

 A smile appeared on my face as I thought it was something like invitation and all but as soon as I started to read it, tears collected in my eyes and I fell to my knees for not believing it.

"Prince Ranvijay,

This is to propose the wedding of my youngest daughter Aishwarya with you in exchange of the 100000 gold coins. Songarh will be happy to help Suryagarh if you promise to keep my daughter happy in all circumstances.

I hope to hear a positive reply from you,

Raja Sondev,

Songarh,"

My heart suddenly felt heavier and my chest ached with the pain.

That means, I were sold to him.

That means, he purchased me from my father like I was a cattle or a wheat or furniture.

How could he?

And, for 100000 gold coins?

That means, he was only keeping me happy because he was given 100000 gold coins to keep me happy.

It means, he was good to me because he was told to be good with me.

And, these gold bangles of his mother was just to make me fool and happy.

How could he?

How could my father do that to me?

I broke into the silent cries and looked around me. The empty chamber, and the noise of this 100000 gold coins ringing loud in my head. The imagination of a sack of gold coins in exchange of me.

And, then asking me to learn and then doing business just to take more benefit from me.

That means, I was nothing to him. Just an financial alliances.

How could he?

"Princess,"

Suddenly, the voice of Moni caught my attention and I washed my tears immediately to look at her.

"Ji,"

I asked and she looked at me with the confused face and told me.

"Do not cry now. Hukum has already left for the Suryagarh. He will be here the day after tomorrow. Ranaji got the letter and asked me to tell you,"

She said and my heart broke even more.

He never told me.

And, once again he would be behaving so loving to me because he was given a lifetime wage to keep me happy.

How could I fall for his lies?

I mean, I always knew that he was so good for me. He was so handsome and good looking and I were nothing in front of him.

I could I not understand it before.

I mean, why would such a handsome man marry a girl like me?

My heart was breaking even more and I did not know what to do now.

But, Suddenly I did not have the courage to look at him, I could not talk to him.

He deceived me, he used me for his own good and made me feel like existed when in actual he was just me.

I immediately stood up and put the scrolls back to the Almirah.

I did not want to talk to him, I did not want to stay here even for another moment.

"Moni,"

I looked at her and she asked.

"Ji,"

"Can you get me a pen and paper?"

I asked.

I wanted to go back to Songarh. I was not a cattle, not a sack of wheat or furniture, he could trade. No one could make someone happy with the gold coins. He was forcibly in a relationship with me. He should not be.

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