Another Clem mono! This one's spoken to his best friend after he learns his true identity. I've performed this one a couple of times. It helps to have a Hamlet actually onstage with you, instead of pretending he's somewhere in the audience.

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Wow.

That's... wow.

This is crazy. All of this is crazy.

Because I mean I have a life on the surface, that's what I kept telling everyone while they had me, it's what I kept telling myself, actually. Kept me sane. But now you're saying I was meant to live my life down here, if everything had gone to plan.

Hamlet, I'd be someone else. I wouldn't be me, I'd be someone else. I wouldn't even have the same name. The only constant would be... you.

I don't know what to do.

There's no way I can stay down here forever. That's just... not me. I mean it could have been, but it isn't, thank goodness. I *like* me. I wouldn't want to be someone else.

I can't just put this behind me, though. That'd mean putting you behind me, and that's the last thing in the world I'm prepared to do. You have ties here, and-

And, well, now that I come to think of it, so do I. Can't forget that. Huh.

I'm gonna have to wing it. I can't stay, but I can't leave, not totally. I'll be in two places at once, two different worlds. A double life.

A double life.

Oh, good gracious, this is crazy.

So I guess I'm living a double life, now, Hamlet. There's my life on the surface, the life I've always known, and now there's another down here that I don't know what to do with.

There are a lot of things I need to learn. I need to learn how to act, how to present myself, the etiquette, all of that. I've read books but I'm not sure that makes me an expert. This is going to be a lot of acting, I think, which is okay because I'm good at acting. I just hope I'm good enough.

Everything's got so complicated so quickly, and I don't know what to do, but I'll figure it out. We'll figure it out. We always do.

I'm gonna have to learn to love both of them, Hamlet. Both of my lives. But we'll figure it out. We always do.