Elora's POV

IT felt like time froze after he said those words. I was just blankly staring at Elrond in shock and disbelief. It already became hard for me to process that we were living in separate worlds, but then I learned about new things which were even harder to digest.

I just wanted to know if he found my counterpart in his world because it seemed so easy for him to accept that we could never meet in person; that even though we were both feeling something special for each other, he had no difficulty accepting that we should just forget our feelings.

Kung ako ang tatanungin, alam kong hindi ganoon kadali para sa akin na talikuran na lamang ang lahat. It took me a lot of time and courage to accept the growing feelings I had for him. I couldn't just let go. Ngunit noong sinabi niya sa akin ang tungkol sa aking kapalaran sa kanyang mundo ay para akong nanlambot. Ayaw kong maniwala.

"Y-you're kidding, right?" I tried to deny the cruel reality in his world when the time came to life for me again. "It's not a good joke, Elrond."

Although Elrond could be really playful, I could tell―just by looking into his eyes―that he wasn't playing games with me. He wasn't lying. He was also having a hard time accepting that fact but he pretended like it was fine with him.

Sa pagkakataon na 'yon ay mas kaya ko pang tanggapin na nagsinungaling siya sa akin. Hindi ako magdadalawang-isip na patawarin siya kung bigla niyang sabihing umaarte lamang siya upang i-prank ako. I would rather have him take back those words.

"Sana nga nagbibiro lang ako, Elora..." Mapait siyang ngumiti at iniwas bahagya ang tingin sa akin. "Sana nga hindi totoo 'yong nalaman ko. Nahirapan din akong tanggapin 'yon."

So, I really have a twin named Elise and the Elora in his world is already dead...

"Iyon ba ang dahilan kung bakit mo ako tinawag na Elise noon?" tahimik kong tanong habang nagbabalik-tanaw. "You thought she was me?"

Tahimik siyang tumango. "Pero kahit na magkamukhang-magkamukha kayo, malaki ang pagkakaiba ninyong dalawa," dagdag niya at muling may ngiting sumilay sa kanyang mga labi. "Iba ang kilos mo, ang pagsasalita, ang pag-iisip mo... Gaya mo ay mas gusto rin kita."

I bit my lower lip as those sweet words were followed by a painful sting. Hindi ko magawang sumaya nang tuluyan. Doon pumasok sa aking isipan kung bakit siguro pinili na lang ni Elrond ang daan kung saang mas magiging madali ang lahat para sa aming dalawa.

In our case, I wouldn't blame him for thinking that way. What we were facing wasn't just a simple long-distance situation. It was more than that. Nasa magkaibang mundo kaming dalawa. Wala pang one percent ang posibilidad na makita namin ang isa't isa.

Matapos ang aming pag-uusap ni Elrond ay halos malunod ako sa pag-iisip. Natigil nga lang nang narinig ko ang pagkatok mula sa labas. Mabilis akong nag-angat ng tingin sa pintuan kung saang dumungaw ang ulo ni mommy.

"Elora," marahang tawag niya sa aking pangalan habang nakangiti. "Let's eat dinner. Nakauwi na ang daddy mo."

It became our thing to eat all together as a family. But of course, it didn't happen all the time. Minsan ay ginagabi ng uwi si daddy galing sa site at naiintindihan namin 'yon ni mommy. Kaya kahit na medyo wala akong gana, tumayo pa rin ako upang sumama kay mommy pababa upang kumain. I didn't want to take the time and attention they were giving me for granted. Matagal kong hiniling 'yon kaya alam kong kailangan kong pahalagahan.

*****

"NA-APPROVE na ang leave ko kanina," masayang anunsyo ni mommy habang nasa gitna kami ng pagkain. "I'm so excited for our first overseas trip as a family. Kaya, hon, asikasuhin mo na rin ang leave mo sa firm. Wala ka naman nang personal client, 'di ba?"

Every dinner, whenever we were complete, my mother would update us regarding the progress of her planning for our trip. It was already decided that we would go to Taiwan. She already booked plane tickets ahead of time for cheaper airfare. She even wanted to go to South Korea or Japan but it would be a hassle to process our visas with only a limited time. Busy rin si mommy sa trabaho kaya tinanggal niya rin 'yon agad sa kanyang listahan.

"Nakapag-file na rin ako ng leave sa sinabi mong dates," sabi naman ni daddy. "Patapos na rin iyong project ko na hawak ko."

"That's great!" she exclaimed in excitement. "Bukas maghahanap na ako ng hotel. I'm still undecided if we should just rent an Airbnb or..." My mother's voice gradually faded out as I sank into my own thoughts.

Marahan kong tinusok-tusok ang manok sa aking plato. Halos hindi ko pa nababawasan ang kanin na kinuha kahit na hindi naman ganoon kadami ang aking sinandok.

Lumipad ang aking isipan sa sinabi ni Elrond. He said I had a twin sister named Elise. Isa sa mga dahilan kung bakit hindi ako makapaniwala sa kanyang sinabi ay dahil wala akong kakambal. I didn't even have a sister. Nag-iisang anak ako ng aking mga magulang.

If we are in a parallel world, we all should have our counterparts in both worlds. I already died in Elrond's world while he's still living in mine. But what really makes me confused about all these, how come Elise doesn't have any counterpart in this world?

"Elora?"

Ang mainit na kamay ni mommy ay ipinatong niya sa aking braso. I quickly snapped out from reverie and turned to her. She was watching me with a worried look on her face. Napasulyap din ako kay daddy at ganoon din ang kanyang tingin.

"Ano ang iniisip mo?" nag-aalalang tanong niya. "Napapansin kong madalas kang parang malalim ang iniisip. Is there something wrong? May pinagdaraanan ka ba?"

Napaawang ang aking mga labi. Tiningnan ko ulit si daddy at saka muling ibinalik kay mommy ang tingin. Alam kong hindi ako matatahimik hangga't hindi ko nakukuha ang sagot na gusto kong malaman. Kung mayroong makapagbibigay sa akin n'on, silang dalawa 'yon.

However, even though I knew all that, I still didn't know how to pop the question. I couldn't compose my words properly that I ended up testing the waters instead of being direct.

Nag-angat ako ng tingin sa kanilang dalawa at saka pinilit ang sariling ngumiti. "Naisip ninyo po bang pangalanan akong Elise?"

Both my parents couldn't keep their reactions in check. My mother's shoulders fell as her lips parted, while my father's eyes widened. They were both caught off guard.

"Bakit mo naman biglang naisip 'yan?" Dahil hindi makapagsalita agad si mommy sa gulat ay si daddy ang kumausap sa akin. "Since you were still inside your mom's belly, we already named you Elora."

I could tell that my father was hiding something from me, even when he tried so hard to keep a cool and calm face. With just one question, I already got closer to the truth.

"Kung ganoon, Daddy, sino si Elise?" Mas nilinaw ko na ang aking intensyon sa pagtatanong. I wanted them to realize that I already knew something. Ang gusto ko na lang ay ipaliwanag nila sa akin ang lahat. I wanted to be enlightened. "Bakit... Bakit hindi natin siya kasama ngayon?"

My father tightly pressed his lips into a thin line. He couldn't answer my question anymore as he was speechless.

"Elora..." Kinuha ni mommy ang aking atensyon nang hawakan niya ang aking mga kamay upang iharap ako sa kanya. "Ka-kanino mo nalaman 'yan? Sino ang nagsabi sa 'yo?"

"Hindi na po importante kung sino ang nagsabi sa akin, 'mmy..." sabi ko na lang dahil hindi ko naman puwedeng sabihin sa kanya ang katotohanan. Baka isipin nilang nababaliw lang ako. "I just really want to know... Who is Elise and why are you hiding her from me?"

Silence filled the room with tension. My mother held my gaze, and I also did the same thing.

"She's..." She took a deep breath and a lonely smile crept on her lips. "She's your twin sister..."

Twin sister... So it's real. I really have a twin sister just like what Elrond told me and her name is Elise.

I didn't know exactly what to feel. It was almost close to nothing. Punong-puno lang ng mga katanungan ang aking isipan tungkol sa kanya.

Napakunot ang aking noo dahil gulong-gulo na ako sa mga nalalaman. "N-nasaan po siya ngayon?"

Bumagsak lalo ang mga mata ni mommy hanggang sa tuluyan na siyang napayuko. Lumapit si daddy sa kanya upang siya'y hagkan. That was the only time I started to feel something. It hurt me to see my parents in pain. Kahit walang tumutulong luha sa kanilang mga mata ay nararamdaman ko ang sakit at kanilang paghihirap.

"Mom..." My voice was quiet and soft as I called out to her, afraid that I might hurt her more.

Kinagat ni mommy ang kanyang mga labi at hinawakan ang braso ni daddy. Nanatili akong pinanonood silang dalawa, hindi malaman kung ano ang dapat gawin upang mawala ang sakit na kanilang nararamdaman.

I didn't want to pressure them anymore. I just remained quiet on my seat while I waited for my mother to finally get a hold of herself. Hindi nagtagal ay bumalik na si daddy sa kanyang upuan habang nag-angat naman ng tingin sa akin si mommy.

"Noong 14 weeks ko na kayong ipinagbubuntis, ang sabi ng OB sa akin ay mayroong serious abnormalities ang kakambal mo," simula niya sa pagkukuwento. "She already warned me that time that she would not live long after birth. Malaki rin ang posibilidad na malaglag siya habang ipinagbubuntis ko."

"I asked your mother to file an emergency maternity leave after her check-up. Delikado ang pagbubuntis niya at ayaw kong mahirapan siya sa trabaho. We tried our best to keep your twin, Elora," si daddy ang nagpatuloy. "We thought she would survive when your mother gave birth to you both..." Tumigil siya upang huminga nang malalim. "Pero wala pang sampung minuto ay binawi na siya sa atin."

I didn't need them to tell me directly what to my twin sister. She died. She's been dead for years already.

"Then, why didn't you tell me about her?" I asked them, confused why they had to hide something so important from me. "All this time, I thought I was an only child. I didn't know anything―"

"I asked your father not to tell you about it," my mother confessed. "I'm not sure if it was a selfish decision we made, but we don't want you to grieve over her death. I suffered under postpartum depression for more than a year. It wasn't easy for me to move on from her death, and I didn't want you to experience that. Not even a bit of that excruciating feeling. We want you to live happily."

"Iyon din ang dahilan kung bakit hindi ka na namin nasundan," paliwanag ni daddy. "Ayaw kong dumaan ulit sa ganoong hirap ang mommy mo. The risk that I might lose another child gave me was too much. I just couldn't overcome that trauma."

Hindi ko na malaman ang aking sasabihin. My heart was hurting for my parents, especially my mother. I hated that I knew nothing about these things, but I couldn't really blame them. Naiintindihan kong iniisip lamang nila ang aking nararamdaman. But I just wished I knew their sufferings. Kahit ayon lang sana.

"Where is her remains?" I asked under my breath as my voice got so weak.

"We buried her in a cemetery," daddy replied. "If you want, we can take you to her tomorrow. Hindi ako papasok ng umaga para samahan ka."

And that was what we did. I accepted my father's invitation to visit my twin sister's grave.

"Elise Amelia G. Arceo..." I quietly recited the name written on her gravestone after I gave the colorful bouquet of assorted flowers. We had no idea what would be her favorite color and flower so we got most of it for her.

Ilang oras din kaming nanatili sa sementeryo. Nang patirik na nga lang ang araw ay umalis na kami upang kumain ng hapunan at pagkatapos no'n ay hinatid kami ni daddy pauwi ng bahay bago siya pumasok sa trabaho.

My mother decided not to go to work as she was emotionally drained. I also didn't attend school. Napapadalas na ang absent ko, ngunit mabuti na lang ay kaya kong makahabol. Hindi mahirap dahil wala pa namang tatlong araw akong nag-a-absent sa klase. Karina would also send me notes and update me about our assignments that we needed to pass.

Pagkapasok ko sa aking kuwarto ay tulala akong nakatingin sa lapag habang iniisip ang mga nangyari nitong nakaraang mga araw. I didn't know how I was holding up to all the crazy happenings. Sunod-sunod nangyari ang lahat.

Kahit na naging mahirap para sa akin na paniwalaan ang mga katotohanan na nalaman, alam kong nakabuti rin 'yon. I was certain that my parents wouldn't tell me anything about Elise if I didn't ask them. At very least, it brought me peace of mind. I got to understand them better. Kahit papaano rin ay naramdaman kong nabuo ang aking pagkatao.

Napabuntonghininga ako nang maisip si Elrond. Binuksan ko ulit ang Alter app upang i-message siya.

eloramariz: Thank you for telling me about Elise.

I thought he wouldn't reply because he was probably at school, but he did. He replied as soon as the message was successfully sent.

lord_elrond01: Nakilala mo na siya? Nandiyan din ba siya sa mundo mo?

Muli akong huminga nang malalim at nagtipa.

eloramariz: Yes. And just like you said, she's really my twin sister.

lord_elrond01: Pero ba't sabi mo sa akin noon na nag-iisa kang anak ng mga magulang mo?

eloramariz: Yes.

eloramariz: That's what I thought. Iyon ang pinaniwalaan ko simula nang nagkaroon ako ng sariling pag-iisip.

lord_elrond01: Ano ang ibig mong sabihin?

Pursing my lips, as it was harder for me to speak with him through chat, I decided to try and give him a call instead.

eloramariz: Can I call?

Na-seen agad ni Elrond ang aking mensahe ngunit matagal-tagal bago rin siya nakapag-reply sa akin.

lord_elrond01: Sige. Ako na ang tatawag sa 'yo.

Gaya ng sabi niya ay siya nga ang tumawag sa akin. Agad ko iyong sinagot at bumungad ang kanyang mukha sa akin. He was wearing his school uniform and it looked like he was alone inside a vacant room.

"May klase ka ba?" nag-aalangan kong tanong. "Baka nakaaabala ako."

"Break time namin ngayon kaya okay lang," agap niya at saka nag-iba ang anggulo ng screen nang ipinatong niya kung saan ang kanyang cellphone. "Ano ang nalaman mo tungkol sa kakambal mo?"

I bit my lower lip and showed him a bitter smile. "She died only minutes after she was born," I told him, and his lips parted as his eyes slightly widened. "The reason why I thought I was an only child was because my parents didn't tell me about her. Ayaw nilang malaman ko ang tungkol kay Elise dahil ayaw nilang mangulila ako sa kanyang pagkamatay."

"So, she's dead in your world, while you're also dead in mine..." bulong ni Elrond nang malaman ang masamang kapalaran ng aking kakambal. Sa dinami-rami ng emosyon sa kanyang mga mata ay wala akong napangalanan ni isa. "Parang napakasaklap naman 'ata niyan... Daig pa natin ang nasa Sci-Fi movie." Pinilit niya ang sariling matawa upang pagaanin ang aming usapan.

Tipid akong ngumiti habang unti-unti ko ring tinatanggap ang mga nalaman. Sumandal ako sa headboard ng aking kama at kinuha ang unan upang doon ipatong ang aking kamay habang nakatapat ang cellphone sa akin.

Nanatiling tahimik si Elrond. Kahit na nakatingin siya sa screen ay alam kong wala sa akin ang kanyang atensyon. The look in his eyes told me that he was in deep thought.

I actually had a thought of what he was thinking at that moment. Kung patay ako sa kanyang mundo at buhay ako rito; at kung kabaliktaran naman n'on ang situwasyon ng aking kambal, sa tingin ko ay iniisip niya rin kung posible bang buhay ang kanyang ina sa aking mundo. He just couldn't ask me about that because I could see that he was scared. Natatakot siyang masaktan ulit kung sakaling hindi ayon sa kagustuhan niya ang sagot na hinahanap.

But to be honest, he didn't have to worry about things. So I knew I had to assure him.

"By the way..." I trailed and waited for him to give me his attention, which he did right away. "I want to tell you something."

His Adam's apple moved, telling me that he was nervous. "A-ano 'yon?"

"Your mom..." I smiled reassuringly before I continued. "I already met your mom."

Napaawang ang kanyang mga labi. Umayos siya sa pagkakaupo at kinuha ang kanyang cellphone. Alam ko dahil halos sakupin ng buong mukha niya ang screen.

"Nagkita na kayo? N-nakausap mo siya?" natataranta niyang tanong sa akin. "Ibig sabihin, buhay pa siya riyan?"

Nang makita ko ang saya sa kanyang mga mata ay mas lalo akong napangiti habang tumatango. Walang salitang bumagsak ang kanyang luha nang kumpirmahin ko 'yon. The smile on his face was priceless. Even when we were in separate worlds, his happiness was radiating all the way here.

"Kumusta siya?" sunod niyang tanong. "Ayos lang naman ba siya? Ano ang ginagawa niya? Paano mo siya nakausap?"

"Noong araw na nakilala kita, pumunta siya sa amin no'n para bigyan kami ng succulent dahil kalilipat lang nila sa bahay malapit sa amin," kuwento ko at kita kong handang-handa siyang makinig. "I just found out a few days ago that she's your mother when I stalked your counterpart here. And you don't have to worry about Tita Galadriel, Elrond. She's in good health and she's even working as a professional engineer."

I omitted the fact that she was not in a good relationship with Elrond's counterpart in my world because it wasn't my story to tell. I also didn't want to worry Elrond about that.

"Thank you, Elora!" tuwang-tuwa niyang sabi. "Hindi mo alam kung gaano mo ako napasaya. Salamat―" Biglang natigil si Elrond sa pagsasalita nang mukhang mayroon siyang naisip. His eyes shot wide open before he looked in mine with so much intensity. "Elora, paano kung sabihin ko sa 'yong may paraan upang makapunta ako riyan? Handa mo ba akong tulungan?"

Mirroring his expression a while ago, my eyes also widened as I was taken aback. I thought he was just joking but he was very serious. And even though it almost seemed impossible, I just found myself nodding my head.