"Hey, Mrs. Smith." Lachlan manages to offer up a shaky smile as Kamari answers the door. "I'm here to- I just wanted- needed to look around. I'm sorry if I'm being a bother."

"Not at all." Kamari smiles at Lachlan, opening the door wider and signalling him to come in. "Holler if you need anything."

"Thank you." Lachlan nods as he slips his shoes off, his smile slipping too. He slowly steps up the stairs. The pictures on Kieran's door feel so cold under his fingertips, like they know he's gone too.

He pushes open the bedroom door. His eyes zero in on a picture sitting atop Kieran's nightstand.

He remembers their first date, the one set in the wooden frame. Why wouldn't he? Kieran had taken him to laser tag, which he turned out to suck at. Lachlan couldn't help but laugh every time he shot Kieran, watching with a big smile as Kieran kissed his cheek as a congratulations.

A hoodie lays draped over the back of Kieran's chair. Lachlan picks it up and slips it on, the scent of vanilla and cookies enveloping his senses.

Every hug Kieran ever gave him, every kiss, was wrapped in vanilla and sugar cookies. It was held in this scent. Lachlan could remember the times he came home smelling like his boyfriend instead of himself. He'd laugh at Kieran on the phone later, accusing him of marking him with his scent like a dog.

Lachlan doesn't laugh now at his ruined memories. He's never gonna feel Kieran's arms around him, Kieran's lips against his, Kieran's scent drifting up his nose.

It's gone.

It's all gone.

Lachlan reaches out and picks up the photo with shaking hands, tears blurring his vision to the point of only being able to make out solid colors.

And then they fall, one by one, down his cheeks, dripping onto the glass protecting the picture. On Kieran's hands, on Lachlan's stomach, on Kieran's face, his smile.

Lachlan falls to his knees, cradling the picture to his chest as he curls over. Silent screams tear from his throat, the wood biting his skin as he clutches the frame tighter.

Tighter, tighter, tighter, until something cracks. Lachlan drops the photo and hunches over until his forehead is touching the ground, hands grabbing at the slightly too big hoodie on his body.