When those days show up 

Like tumbleweeds

Rolling

Into a usually well-ordered field of thought

And you sit silent

Befuddled by their presence- 

There's nought to do but examine each one thoroughly

And this takes time

Far too much time

When you can't seem to reach that space

Where words already made await in tidy sentences

When all you have is chaos of place

When the pulse beats not to your heart's beat

But to the symphonies having passed between you-

There's nought to do but circuit

Amid beloved ones and strangers

     (Some of the latter hinting at future prospects)

And ponder how long it will take - this time -

To tap out words

When you fragment millions of once-shared letters

Into tiny shards

And toss them to the water's edge

Where they are cut and polished

By the tide of time

Till they refract moonlight-like myriad diamonds-

There's nought to do

But stare at former dialogues of delight

Now indecipherable

When you hurt so much internally

When bloody wounds seep inward

When there's a viper dancing in your belly

And your heart - ruptured and severed from your brain -

Struggles to keep you upright and moving doing being

When your affliction is invisible to all but one

And you carry it around

In the routine that is your living

And you want to cast it aside  

Trade it in for the danger of driving past the city limits

Driving straight through one State two five ten-

Each differing landscape

Producing a new state of being in you

Yet underlying the precipice luring

The crisis ever-present

Ever menacing-

     (When you fret for your safety your sanity)

When you want to swipe an arm

And force to the side all the people

All the things - the stuff crowding -

Till you have blessed barren space

When you want to silence the chattering of all your different selves

Each vying for clemency

And this

Clashes with the cacophony

Of open mouths around you chattering

Robbing you of breath and speech-

There's nought to do but retreat

Regress

... Abscond you again to her island

Seek out her footprints and follow 

Yours over hers

Hers over yours-

You've never heeded her ahead

You may never do

But her footprints  are ever leading you forward

And it matters little that you might never touch

Only thoughts matter

The mind digressing

Turning you around

     (So you can image her in the distance as you run 

     As you near and you spy her like some wraith

     The diamonds at her feet refracting her green sheath

     Spreading an aura of soothing serenity)

Travel there as often as you like

The island is off limits to all but you-

She secured it in her mind

Paid for in perpetuity

And there it waits  

     (Only for you)

Peace she offers brand new

And the tranquillity

Of muted bird calls

Softened breezes-

Time to breathe back some of the scattered fragments

And let their refraction radiate on the page

Affirming yet again

There will always be an extended wing across your shoulders

Shielding you from the sting of rain

And the burn of sun

And the winds of pain

And the cold of one