Then
Jeremy

I couldn't remember where I was nor how much time had passed. Since the day I had found the blood lake I hadn't stopped walking. Only slept when I was too exhausted to stay awake. I didn't eat, I barely drank. Everybody around me died, so why not me too?

What use was it living in a world where everything you cherished got ripped away?

I dragged Kyla's backpack with me. I had it clutched in one of my hands, not letting go for anything. It was the last thing left I could hold on to. I had nothing else anymore.

I continued walking. One step in front of the other. What else was there for me to do? A step and another. And another.

Walking, stepping until my feet couldn't take it any longer and released me to gravity.

I slumped on the ground with a small thud. I was hardly anything more than air. I was hardly even existing. I was as good as dead.

I closed my eyes. Maybe it was time for me to die.

The ground felt cool against my skin and I could feel myself relax. I didn't feel the hunger nor my dry throat. All I felt was the peace of nature all around me.

Maybe dying wasn't the worst thing in the world after all.

I tried to think of my family. If I would see them again? I would like that. I would like that very much.
I thought of all the wonderful moments, all the memories I had of them, encasing myself in warmth right before the end.

I thought of Kyla and the nice picnic we had had. I had wanted to spend more time with her. I was sure that she would have been a great friend once she'd grown used to me.

If I was about to die I wouldn't die alone. Even if the people I had loved were all dead, they were also right here in my heart. The thought made me smile.
I took one last breath and then

I died.

Kyla

Mybreath was ragged. I was bleeding. It hurt. It hurt a lot.
It wasn't that severe.

I had been injured before and I had survived. I would survive this, too, I told myself.

I ripped off pieces of my shirt to wipe away the blood. It didn't help. It just kept coming and coming. Gushing from my wounds. Everything red.

With the last of my strength I crawled next to a tree and lay my head in some soft moss. A nice smell surrounded me but against the pain it felt like it was laughing at me.

It hurt and I knew that in this state I was easy prey but it didn't matter. I wasn't a prime target right now. All my food was gone, my clothes were muddy and bloodied and ripped apart. I had nothing of value with me.

I would be fine.

I felt myself slowly drifting to sleep. It would be fine. I would be fine.
Everything would be fine.
Totally fine.

As I closed my eyes I thought about Jeremy and if he'd gotten away. He probably did. He had looked like a fast runner.
I thought about the boy I hadn't liked very much but now wanted to live on. I thought about the blood loss and my exhaustion. I thought about a million things I needed to do but didn't have the strength to.

I really hoped I would wake up tomorrow. I really hoped I would be fine.

As I was finally encased by a warm and comforting darkness I was left with one thought.

After everything I had been through, I didn't want to die now.

Jeremy

I was awoken by someone trying to force food and water down my throat at the same time, almost choking me to death.
... If I wasn't already dead.

Hectically I drove up, gagging and spitting out everything the person had stuffed into my throat.

I was still heavily coughing as a voice next to me said, "I'm so sorry!"
She put her hand on my back and made soothing noises.
Despite her attempt to kill me just now, the girl didn't seem very threatening.

"I'm sorry", she said again. "I was just afraid that you would die if I wouldn't get you to eat."

After I finally had cleared my breathing passage I looked at the girl who was kneeling next to me.
She had long blonde hair, pulled together into a ponytail that was hanging over her shoulder. She probably was around my age. She looked cute.

"I'm not dead", I stated.

I had never believed in a god or an afterlife but I refused to believe that it would be the exact same hellish woods I had wanted to escape.

"And you won't be", she said, her blue eyes defiantly staring at me. "As long as you stay with me I won't let you die!"

"What if I want to die", was all I could think of saying.

Did I want to die? I didn't know.
Right now, I didn't really see much sense in living, if I was honest.

The girl stared at me even more intensely and I could feel myself backing away a little.

"You won't", she said after awhile.
"I will", I answered.

"You won't", she countered, stubbornly.
"I will", I said, even though I didn't know why I was so insistent. Maybe because everyone I knew was dead.

Death was inevitable.

"You won't."
This was getting ridiculous.

"Why shouldn't I?"
"Changing your tactic, I see", the girl said. "You're clever."

Before I could distance myself form her even further she grabbed my hands, squeezed them and looked directly into my eyes.

I felt extremely uncomfortable at the moment. Unconsciously, I leaned back.

"You deserve to live because your life is as precious as anyone else's and you can't just throw it away like that", she answered earnestly.

"Even if a lot of people died because of me?", I asked.
"Yes", the girl said.

"My name is Jeremy", I heard myself saying, not really knowing why.
"Lindsey", she said and smiled. I tried to smile back.
All of this was a little bit much to wake up to when you'd thought you had died.

"Thanks", I told her nevertheless.

My heart was still hurting but for now I didn't feel like everything was senseless. And anyway, I was sure that my parents would be mad if I died now. If I would see them again in some afterlife they surely would give me a long lecture about how I should have lived on.

I missed them.

The girl was still holding my hands and as uncomfortable as I had felt earlier now I felt even more weird. I could feel my cheeks warming and I didn't want to look like a tomato in front of a girl.

"C-could you ... maybe ... let go?", I stammered. Lindsey let go of my hands and smiled at me.
Where did she get all her smiles from?

"Now eat", she ordered and shoved her hand into my face.

Before she could hit anything vital like my eye I opened my mouth and let her feed me. I tried to argue my way out of being fed by telling Lindsey that I was quite capable of eating on my own, but she wouldn't take no for an answer and so the girl I had just met kept feeding me spoonfuls of mashed apples. And even though I wasn't in a very desirable position right now the food tasted like heaven. I had forgotten how wonderful eating was.

I also drank a lot of water, which,thankfully, Lindsey allowed me to drink on my own. I didn't know what I would have done if she had tried to force the plastic bottle between my lips as well.

"Are you all alone?", I asked beforeI took another big gulp.

"No", she said. "I live with my friends here in the woods. We're three but Ronald's sister's with us, too, so we're actually four. Forget what I said, we're four. My two friends and Ronald's sister. She's sixteen and really, really old and intelligent."

"Ok", I said a bit overtaken. Honestly, I didn't really know what to do with that information. Especially because I didn't know who Ronald was. Maybe I shouldn't have asked.

"Can you stand?", Lindsey asked instead of elaborating and because I didn't want to seem weak in front of a girl, I stood up. My legs felt wobbly and maybe one or two toes had fallen asleep but I could manage. I definitely felt better than before.

"Great", Lindsey smiled. "I'll introduce you to the others. Come on."

She started skipping forward and I followed her.
Tiny needles stabbed into my toes and I tried my best to ignore them.

"How did you find me?", I asked once I could follow her without having to concentrate on not falling down through a lack of toe strength.

"Oh, I was out looking for firewood, when I stumbled across you", Lindsey said with a quick look back at me.

We wandered through the woods for awhile, her leading the way, me following a little behind, and just as I started to wonder why the hell Lindsey had gone so far from her original home, we arrived at a little glade. Exactly like Lindsey had proclaimed I could see three other people through the trees. There was one tall girl, which I assumed to be Ronald's sister, and two guys who were probably about my age. One of them was a little chubby but I tried not to let my prejudices precede me.

Lindsey waved them as soon as we entered the glade.

All of them stared at me.

"Guys", she said cheerfully. "That's Jeremy. Jeremy, this is Jayden, Ronald and Harper."

Jayden apparently was the chubby one, while Ron was more on the skinny side. Harper had short brown hair that ended just above her shoulders. She smiled at me nicely.

As I came nearer she bent down and petted my head as if I were a dog. "Hello, Jeremy! I'm Harper. How are you doing?"

"F-fine", I said. I wasn't used to being treated this nicely. If my siblings had ever behaved this compassionately I would have thought they were dying.

"That's good", she said smiling and straightened up again. "Do you have a family, Jeremy?"

There it was again. That feeling as if my heart wanted to eat itself away.
I didn't want to think about it.

Still, I shook my head. "I had a friend, but now I'm all alone."
If Kyla was really dead? I hoped not.

"Well, then it's settled", Harper said. "You can live with us from now on."

I just stared at her. I hadn't thought that they would just automatically take me in. After all, I was just one more mouth to feed.

"Congrats, you're part of the family now", Lindsey said and punched my arm in a friendly but hurtful way.
This felt more like the affection I was used to.
Maybe I could feel at home here.

"Ok, you guys, explain our little family to Jeremy", Harper said. "I'll go and see if I can score us some meat."

"She's the strongest girl, I know", Ronald said to me proudly as his sister vanished through the tree line. "Don't tell her I said that", he added and I grinned.
I new exactly how he felt. I had adored my sister but I would have never told her that. She would have only used it to gloat. There had been no way I would have given her that much power over me.
Now she was dead.

"She's stronger than me", Jayden added now, which I easily believed just by looking at him. "And she's an amazing cook."

I just nodded, not really knowing what I should answer.
Before the silence came even close to awkward Lindsey grabbed my arm and dragged me to one of the trees.

"Everyone has a tree to themselves", she explained. "But you'll sleep with me."

Lindsey stated this so matter-of-factly that I almost didn't question it.
I just wanted to put in a word of protest as I saw the ragged, worn out backpack laying there. My thoughts moved to Kyla. I hoped she was alright.
"What does the backpack do here?", I asked. I thought I had lost it.

Lindsey looked at me bashfully. "Well, actually, Ronald and I found you, not just me. You didn't have anything else but the backpack and so he went back with it and explained everything to Harper and Jayden and I waited for you to wake up. I mean I would have carried you to the Glade but you were a little too heavy for me."
I just looked at her. Suddenly I was very glad that I hadn't died.
I didn't even know why.

"What happened to you?", Jayden asked now.

"I ...", I started and immediately stopped. I just had met them a few minutes ago. I didn't know if I wanted to tell them my entire life story. "It belonged to my friend", I continued in the end. "We were attacked by wolves."
I paused. Neither of them said anything but I could see the pity in their eyes.

"You didn't find a girl, did you? She has really messy hair and a super crappy attitude."
Ronald shook his head. "I'm sorry."

I hadn't expected anything else. It had been wishful thinking.

Deep down I knew that, whether dead or alive, I would probably never see Kyla again. The forest was big and it would be close to a miracle if we ran across each other a second time.

I sat down next to the tree.
I knew that Lindsey wanted to sleep with me but right now I felt tooexhausted to care.

"Do you think someone could survive a wolf attack?", I thought out loud. Nobody answered. Again, I hadn't expected them to.
I let myself lie down. I liked them. Harper and Linsey were nice and Jayden and Ronald didn't seem halfbad, either.

I closed my eyes. I thought about my family and wondered if they would have liked them, too. I was sure they would have.

I could feel myself drifting away.

Judging form the sun it was probably afternoon, but I was tired.