Pipers POV;

Peter had been forced out the room by Four, who was now sat on his chair in front of me. I hadn't paid much attention to anything in the last 30 minutes. I could hear them arguing, but I couldn't stop thinking about what I saw.

"Piper?" I knew he was talking to me, but I continued to look down at my hands that were not long ago covered in blood. "Are you ready to talk about it?"

I wasn't.

But I had to, for Tris.

"Yea" I shuffled in the chair, finally looking up at him. He seemed concerned. Rightly so I guess, "after I- you know-" I didn't want to say I'd shot Tris. He nodded, "there was this mirror. Tris and Peter were trapped inside" he put his hand out, inviting me to take it, because I was shaking like a wuss. I did, "I could hear her behind me, Jeanine I mean, she was shouting about taking us? I wasn't sure why but I needed to save Peter and Tris." I turned away. I wasn't going to cry. Not in front of the dauntless trainer.

"So, what did you do then?" I knew he hadn't seen anything after the gun shot. A bit like Peter clearly hadn't. Something I didn't realise until I woke up. I thought it was real Peter behind that mirror. Not a simulation.

"I broke the mirror. Ran through it and they were there"

"Well that's good?" No it wasn't.

"Jeanine and a bunch of men followed, dauntless men, they had us all there, told me one of us had to die. Of course I know it's not very dauntless like but, I chose myself" I turned back to him, "she laughed and spoke about how me and Tris had to suffer? She knew about divergents but I didn't understand why I had to, I waited for her to, I don't know, kill me" when I was in there I didn't know what was real, if I'd actually die.

"But then she started talking about dauntless traitors. The dauntless that protect the divergent" as I said that, I could've sworn Four gulped, pretty loud for someone as tough as nails as he is, "they said that we had to watch the traitors die" I thought she meant me but she didn't. "She killed him Four"

"Peter?" I nodded, a single tear slid down my cheek, "and you thought it was real Peter, not the simulation" I nodded once more.

He stood up and told me to wait, that he was going to grab someone.

I did believe it was Peter. I knew going in there the dangers of it, I knew there was a chance we could actually die in there.

Part of me knew who I wanted to enter, but the stubborn part of me didn't want it to be him.

Will.

I stood up and he practically ran over to hug me, "you're all good now ok?" I wasn't though, I'd watched Peter die and it broke me. I cared about him far more than I should've. "Four told me what you seen"

"He was dead Will, I thought-" tears fell, I didn't stop it, just cried into his chest. "I thought it was the real Peter." He ran his hand down my hair to try and calm me. It wouldn't work. It just kept replaying in my mind.

"Peter told me you said you were dying in there, what did she do to you?" He asked. Nothing. She did nothing.

"Nothing"

He pulled back and looked at me for a moment, then as if he had a lightbulb he said, "dying because he was?" I nodded.

———————

I hadn't spoke to Peter for 3 days. He'd avoided me at all costs, I didn't know why considering he was warm and kind when I woke up. He'd seen everything I feared.

Maybe Chris was right. Maybe he wanted it as leverage and I was the fool who let him see.

I didn't want that to be true but why else would be avoid me for days on end?

———————

Peters POV;

I couldn't face her. Couldn't even look in her direction.

I was so angry at her for risking her life like that. Not to mention watching her nearly die twice. That is something I refuse to do again.

"Four, can I talk to you?" I'd been trying to grab him for a couple days now, he'd been far too busy, probably because of Tris and Piper.

"Make it quick"

"It's about Pipers fear simulation" I had now caught up to him, he still didn't look at me while I spoke to him, not that I blamed him, I usually did the same, "I have a feeling I was seeing something different to what she was seeing" I tried to make what I was hinting at slightly less obvious.

"You mean you saw your own fears?" He blurred out, I wanted to smack him quiet although I knew Four would beat me to a pulp.

"Not exactly they were slightly different," I stopped to think of my own. I feared Piper wanting someone else, and having to hurt her. That wasn't what she had seen. "Like she wasn't full blown making out with some oth-"

"Okay-" he interrupted, "I need to go, just, you both have pretty similar fears, so you saw your own in place of hers" I stopped walking after he spoke.

Similar fears?

So what the hell was she seeing.

Was she seeing me make out with some random girl? Surely thats impossible if she hates me the way she says she does.

"Peter" I looked up to find Will. Great. The hero.

"I'm busy" I tried to push passed, he followed. "Seriously man, leave me alone"

"No, why are you avoiding her" persistent just like Piper.

"I'm not" I lied.

"You are so tell me-"

I grabbed him by the collar, pushing him into a wall, my anger getting the better of me as usual, "leave me. The fuck. Alone"

"I will, if you tell me why you're avoiding her"

"Want nothing to do with her" I shrugged, dropping my hold of him. He shook his head,

"I seen her in the sim room after you left, you have no idea what she saw in there" he argued.

"I know what happened though, she nearly died, and that's on you and your friends using her to get what you don't deserve" he smiled as I spoke. I could kill him.

"You care about her"

"I don't give a shit about her" I protested.

"I think you do, she told me about what happened when she woke up" I hugged her. Out of human decency.

"I think she took that the wrong way mate" I paused beginning to walk away knowing he'd follow, "I was simply being nice"

"Peter Hayes doesn't do nice" he was right, I didn't. I don't. "So why not be honest?" That comment, for some reason threw me over.

The amount of times I've heard the word honest in my life, it was supposed to be our greatest quality at Candor and yet it always felt like an insult when it was said to me. My father, if you could call him that, always made a fuss over how dishonest I was. I became too honest, cruel even but honest.

"Honest?!" I yelled stopping dead again, he nearly walked into me, "you want fucking honesty?" His eyes widened. "I'll give you honest, I don't want to be around her, I can't be around her" he went to speak but I couldn't stop now I'd started, "I watched her nearly die once in the simulation, she was drowning and I felt helpless but she was fine"

"Exactly she's fine Peter-"

"She was fine until I was pulled out and she was stuck in there alone. Her nose started bleeding, she looked fucking dead and I couldn't do anything. I wanted to die there and then" I breathed out, my own eyes now widening. I had just yelled this at him, where anyone could hear. Thankfully I didn't think they had.

"Maybe if you'd spoken to her, you'd know how she felt too"

"How she felt? I can't hear how she felt. I can't allow myself to feel that powerless ever again. I can't fucking care about her" I walked away after I spoke. Will didn't stop me this time. He let me walk, and I'm glad he did.

I stumbled upon that room. The room Piper and I had been in not too long ago, before the simulation crap. She had kissed me in a way no one else ever had. I hadn't felt like that before. I'd slept with people sure, but I hadn't even came close to that with Piper and yet I'd never felt that way before. I wanted her, all of her. Not just her body. Everything about her.

That's something I need to stop. Something I will stop. My hand was on the door handle, something I hadn't even realised I'd done. I wanted to go in there, remind myself of that night.

I pulled the handle down slightly. I was close to going in but I didn't. I let it go. I had to let her go and walk away.

Pipers POV;

I needed time to myself. Time to think about everything that had happened since being in dauntless. My life had flipped completely.

Oh shit. The door. Someone's going to come in and see me sat alone in a meeting room. A meeting room I came to because it reminded me of that night with Peter.

I held my breath, as if that would stop someone coming in.

No one did.