I dreamt of nothing that night that was a strange predicament of my life. It was a sleep not of drowsy eyes, but of a tired soul. The nothingness swathed around me in the late at night, throwing me high and bringing me low. I flowed through the ocean of vacancy and dribbled into the thin line of hope that only rippled away from me.

'Rise and shine sleepy head!' Ian's voice blared in my ears. I groaned and stuffed the pillow over my head.

'Get out.' My hoarse voice didn't put any affect on him as he again chirped like a morning fresh bird.

'Not a very nice way to say good morning back but I'll take it. It's seven and I don't want to destroy your peace but you should get up and go to school.'

'Urgh,' I pushed the pillow deep on my ears. 'Your happy vibe is killing me. Get lost from here Ian before I snap some of your bones.'

To my annoyance, he laughed and I rolled my eyes. I didn't feel sleepy but my puffy eyes from my last night cries might upset him so I stayed, hidden under the pillow. 'I hate this too but my therapist advised me to fake happiness sometimes cause one day, your body will get used to it.' Ian chanted. 'Shitty, but sometimes, it works.'

'I'm pretending enough. Now get lost Ian, I need to sleep.'

'No, you need school. Finals are coming up and you need to keep your ass busy in school.' he tapped me on my shoulder.

The name of school brought a drastic amount of fear to me. School. People. Photos. Gossip. Whisper. Ryan. Me. Me. Me. Hell no! I dug my face in the pillow. 'I don't want to go.' I desperately wished he'd understand me but he knew nothing so how would he?

'What?'

I lifted the pillow up partially and yelled the sentence again. 'I don't want to go Ian!'

'I'm getting loads of calls from your school and I'm out of excuses now Jane. You need to go.'

'Ian please, no. Tell them I've gotten malaria or something.'

The mattress bounced with Ian's weight. 'Look at me.' The warmth of his hands on my shoulder seemed so soothing that I thought I'd just sleep now. He had already sensed that something was wrong so there was no way of hiding.

I threw the pillow covering my face across the bed and sat up. Ian didn't look surprised as I thought he would seeing my puffy eyes rather he looked angry. 'Who did this?'

'Just highschool shit.' I answered casually though I could feel my throat tightening again.

'Abigail? She's bullying you again?' He asked as I got my old brother back. The care of a mother and the worry of a father ridged in his eyes.

'No. It's Logan.'

'The one who set our house on fire?' I nodded and Ian punched on his palm as if he ignored something he should've noticed. 'I saw him around but I didn't know he was back for you. Of course he would.' He sighed when he was done talking to himself. 'Tell me Elle, what happened exactly?'

'Not much.' I started off casually as I told him from Charlotte harassing Ryan, our deal with Harrison,  we sneaking in Charlotte's house, Logan threatening, Logan kidnapping, Logan destroying my life, me being homeless for two days to mine and Ryan's breakup. 

Ian clenched his jaw as he looked more furious at himself than on me. He looked down to his lap as his adam's apples bobbed up and down. 'I failed as an older brother didn't I?' Tears shone in his eyes.

I shook my head as I wrapped my arms around his chest and laid my head on his shoulder. It's been years since I hugged him. 'We both have been shits Ian. Maybe yours worst than mine.' He hugged me back as his rested his chin on my head. 'So tell me , what I missed?'

'Not much.' He quoted. 'I just got in a shitty ass debt that I needed to pay. On my way to find money, I stumbled upon some fellows who didn't waste a single second pushing me into drinking and shit, for some time, it felt good but those fuckers took what I had only left as they gambled money out of me so, and, um ..., I stole some money from you.' I pulled back and looked him in his eyes. He scratched his neck. 'Sorry?'

'You could've asked me.'

'I know, I'm sorry.'

'Well, What happened next?'

'Yeah, Er ..., so someone who helped me get this flat advised me to meet some bad ass to get the money and he asked me to do his dirty work instead of money. And I did steal some things and might've knocked some people too until I was tired of this all. So I drank and drank and Henry found me wasted somewhere on the streets. He helped me with that bad ass dude. I don't know how much he paid him but I know it was a lot and brought me home.'

He looked at me to make sure I was still listening but I've never been intrigued more. 'he helped me with the drinking and stuff Elle. At first I thought he was doing it to get us both kicked out of this house to get mom all to him but actually, he was building back this house and I trust that guy now.'

I sighed. I still didn't trust him but I trusted my brother. I hugged him again and stayed like this for longer. 'I've failed as a younger sister too.' I stated. It's hurt to know how much my brother has gone through too but still, I didn't feel like I helped him enough.

'Nah, you're alright.' He stroked my hair. 'I remember you sleeping on my couch —ahem, with a boy too— as I went through therapies and checking on me and keep asking me what's wrong but I was in such a twisted shit that I couldn't really tell you. You were there for me Elle, and I owe you.'

'Well you do, an ice cream bucket and Tekken matches.'

He chuckled. 'Done.'

That was easy. That was relieving.

***

Ian stopped his car outside our house and nervousness took over me. Logan. Henry.

'I can get the stuff if you want me to.' Ian offered.

'No, I ... ' I almost was to say for him to get it but stopped myself. 'I'll get it.' I got out of the car. With trembling hands now in fists, I unlocked the door with the keys in my pocket.

I took a deep breath as I entered. The door strangely creaked calling up further nervousness. I silently prayed for Logan to be away, I just needed to get some of my clothes , my school books and some other necessities and I'll never set foot in this house again but I was terribly wrong.

Laughs and chuckles sounded from the kitchen. I reached there to see Logan, Henry and Mom having a joyous dinner. Rage boiled in my body but I tried not to let it show. 'Oh, Janelle darling,' she addressed me from the table without bothering to get up to give me a hug after staying away so long. I didn't bother either.

'Hi mom.'

'Jane, come join us,' Henry waved me over to the table. With Ian's story, my vision for him changed. I didn't see extra buff bald man with only a vest and a long beard. I saw his hands that laid delicately over mom's. I observed the how his lips curved up and his grey eyes crinkled when mom cracked a lame joke. I saw how he looked at mom as if without her, he won't be able to live.

And at that moment, I desperately wanted someone to look at me the same way.

But Logan's eyes were already on me and I internally cringed. 'I'm good really.'

'Come on now, won't you listen to Henry?' Mom's authoritative tone was back and reluctantly, I sat on the chair. 'Now, Tell me, what's going on in your life?'

I squirmed as her eyes trailed to my hair that were wildly tied in a bun on my head and my dark circles to my dozen new pimples. 'And specially, tell me what's going on social media with you?'

'What exactly are you talking about?'

She arched her perfectly carved eyebrow. 'You know I'm never against independences but sweetheart, there is a difference betweenness having few nightstands and experiencing many uncalled unhealthy affairs.'

I gritted my teeth and clenched my hands in fists. I wasn't dumb enough to catch her message. It was simple and clear. You are a slut and I'm not proud of you.

'That is not true.' I stated.

'So you say these are rumours then?' It wasn't a suggestion, or a question, it was dare for me to prove her wrong. 'You are saying I'm lying?' I looked at Henry, who from his careful eating, didn't seem like he liked this conversation and then at Logan who was smirking as he pretended to look innocent. You freaking devil, you're going down soon.

'Yes.' I finally said. I was tired of being scared of her. 'Those are rumours and I'd rather suggest you to believe your daughter than social media which does nothing but to lie.' My voice was dangerously calm as, for the first time in my life, looked straight in my mom's eyes.

Her blue eyes turned cold and as her lips parted in a fake smile. 'If only my daughter was what I wanted her to be, I won't budge a second to believe her.'

That was like a slap. 'If only you were a mother like I needed, I won't budge a second to lie.' I snapped. She gave me another fake smile that clearly said, You will pay heavy for this, but I had already left the table and was in my room. I didn't need her in my life anyway.

Some people, I thought, never change.

From the depths of my cupboard,I found a duffle bag and threw it on the bed. I packed my all books in my backpack first and hurled it on the bed. I took some hoodies and some jeans and tossed them in the bag along with the hangers. I opened the drawer to take some socks from it. 'I know you are behind me Logan.'

I heard him chuckling. 'That was smooth.' He commented and I rolled my eyes.

I punched in a combination of numbers and alphabets to take my money out I've been saving since my childhood and as Ian told me, half of it was not where it was supposed to be. I placed the money in my bag and saw Logan's eyes greedily trailing the money that went in. 'I'd like you to get out now.'

'Oh come on Jane,' he said. 'Let's forget about bad old times shall we?' I didn't miss that smirk on his face that I wanted to boil his face down.

'Only if they were forgettable enough.' I tugged my sneakers in making sure the money is deep down. Logan stood up from the bed and I pretended that I don't care but fear took over me. He could pull out a knife out of his pocket and stab me just like that.

'My father thought me that you should be unforgettable.' He was so close to me that his breath fanged on the brim of my ears. His fingers caressed my arms that I almost closed my eyes as my knees wobbled. I knew he'll kill me right there so I turned around to face him that was incredibly close to at least defence myself from the front.

I glanced at his hand that was in his pocket.

'He,' my voice creaked and I cleared my throat. 'He thought you well.'

I looked in his eyes and all I saw was madness. Worse than Charlotte's. It had taken over the warmth, the coldness that rested in his eyes. I didn't see Logan there anymore, the boy I played with in my childhood.

'You are nice.' I blinked in order to look at his hand in his pocket. 'That's why I like you, you know?' He moved forth and I jumped away. The closer he will get, The quickly he will attack. I needed to get out of the room but he had held my hand to stop me. 'You don't talk to me much these days.' He said the same statement he said two years ago. Two years, I forgot how much madness had dominated him.

He had seen the money. He'll either take it, or kill me to take it. It was just like passing over someone's dead boy to get something.

I was the someone. And money was something and he needed it badly.

'I've been busy these days.' I spoke like I was talking to a child. I needed to run. His hand was still in his pocket and he was moving closer.

'With what?' He asked me innocently as he cocked his head.

I tried to feign a good smile. 'Finals are just around.'

'Oh yeah. I get it.' He instantly became softer. He caressed my face, my neck, the scar on my neck. 'How did you get it?' Your fire burnt me.

'I fell from the stairs.' I tried to reach my phone on the bed to inform Ian but Logan was getting more touchy.

'Oh, must've hurt?' His lips kissed my cheeks. 'I don't want to hurt you.' He kissed lower than he did before. 'I just want you but you always run to him.' He kissed on my lips. 'I don't like him. I like you.' He held my neck as he kissed me again and I just went with him. Going against him was just like running in the direction of a troop. 'He ... he gets on my nerves. I told you I don't like him. You don't listen.'

'I will from now.' He stopped talking as his kiss grew passionate. Fierce and strong. I silently prayed for Ian to get in or mom or Henry to save me from him.

Suddenly I was jerked strongly. A strong gasp left my mouth as my mom shrieked and Henry shouted. Ian ran for me but why did he? Everything blurred into something that I couldn't decipher. I lifted up my hands only to see blood on it.

Red, it was too red.

I narrowed my eyes to look past the blood and counted my fingers. i looked up at Logan who stared back at me and at that moment, it was confirmed that he was mad as he looked utterly calm. Ian yelled something in my ear as he pulled me back. Mom's eyes were filled with tears. Henry bellowed some curse words.

Then I looked at the dagger dipped deep in the skin. Before I could see something more, my the world went absolute black.

oOo

*evil dexter's laugh*

This was not what I thought my chapter would go man, I swear but ta da! I like this better now. Let me leave you guys on a deadass cliffhanger while I go get some sleep.

Who do you think was stabbed? Logan or Jane?
Also, what do you think about Ian and Jane's sibling patch-up? (That came out wrong)

🎧 please don't leave me here, I don't know where my heart is 🎶

Tell me in the comments below 👇🏻. I love to read them.

I'll see you somewhat soon. I don't even know when. It will take time. (Surely)

Bye!

Love 💕, huz