"Maybe I should get a bigger binder," I mused, flipping through the pages of my old one.

"What, and have to reorganize everything? Seems awfully wasteful, (Y/n)-chan," Toru said beside me.

And on his far side, Hajime piped up too. "Get a bigger binder and you'll just find more useless shit to fill it with," he said without even sparing a single glance up and away from his homework, and I pouted right away because he was right.

"Maybe that useless shit will be just the advice or strategies we need to get to nationals," I grumbled, closing the binder anyway and returning my focus to the book in front of me.

They were doing homework I had already finished, so I was referring to all the materials I could on team leadership and sports management, specifically. If I was going to stick this out, I wanted to do it right, and that meant putting my all into it.

That was the way of the Kageyama family, of course. We never put anything less than all of ourselves into whatever it was that we were doing. So, I was going to do this - and I was going to do it well.

I'd checked several books out from the library, and since I had nothing else to do while the boys studied, that's what I had chosen to focus on. I took notes on the most effective strategies and the like, and had just been putting it into my binder when I realized how full it was - and the year had only just begun. This was specifically for the team, and I'd gone and filled it with several novels' worth of notes, ideas, and records.

When my pout lingered, and neither of the boys decided to console me, I relaxed my face and closed the binder. Then I checked the time and sighed. "I gotta get going," I said, starting to pack up.

"That's a strange way to say you don't like us anymore," Toru said, glancing up at me briefly from his homework. A breeze blew through the park, hardly swaying the warmth of the day, and I basked in it briefly before starting to pack up. Practice had let out early today - so, in anticipation of the busy weekend, we decided to come here to get ahead on our work.

But now, well... I had plans I needed to get home for.

"Oh, ha, ha," I said, gathering up my belongings. "Very funny. I'm expecting an important call. Really important."

"What, get a boyfriend and didn't tell us?" Haji asked, setting his work down and leaning back on his hands to level an even look at me. "That stings."

"You two are awful," I said. "No, I don't have a boyfriend. I'm getting a call from my dad today."

That caught their attention, and I only continued to pack my things away. I'd told them, probably towards the beginning of the third year of junior high, about my family situation. We didn't tend to go to my house, much, especially not after Toru... realized he was less than willing to be anywhere near Tobio.

I'd told them that I lived with my aunt and uncle (when they were home, anyway), and how my older cousin took care of us both. They listened patiently and kindly as I talked about my grandfather passing and that being the reason I moved in the first place. When he got sick... so did my dad. And even now, he...

"You still haven't seen him?"

"Shut it," Hajime hissed right away. "Don't ask something like that!"

"Thank you, Haji," I said, smiling at him, "but it's ok." I looked at Toru, seeing the regret in his eyes for an outburst like that - but I'd be curious, too. "No, I haven't seen him. Not since I moved in with my cousins."

The two boys glanced at each other briefly. "Do you want to?"

"Yes," I answered, zipping my bag up. "More than anything. But I can't." I stood, smoothed out my skirt, then summoned up a smile. "I'll let you know about staying over tomorrow night," I said, looking at Toru. "Visibility's looking great for tomorrow, right? I won't miss the best night of the season to stargaze. We've got lots to catch up on. I'll just need to make sure Tobio will be alright on his own."

"Right," Toru said quietly. "Er - (Y/n)-chan? You don't need to worry about it."

"But I want to," I said right away, then realized what it was about. "Listen, what I've got going on at home is my problem, ok? I'll take care of what I need to. I'm a Kageyama - we put all that we have into what we do. So I'll be able to handle it. I'll see you later!"

The boys watched me go, both of them wanting to get up and walk me home but neither one wanting to distract her, not even for a moment. Besides all that... They were worried. Very worried.

But for now, all they could do was trust her. So that's exactly what they did.

—

I sat cross-legged in bed, the door closed and in my comfiest pajamas, my phone pressed to my ear. It was the latest gift from my aunt and uncle - for making it into Aoba Johsai. I knew this family had money but I hadn't expected them to spend so much on me, honestly.

But it wasn't like they gifted it to me in person. They'd stopped home only briefly between work trips and left it behind with a note, a card, and their numbers. I called my uncle right away to thank him, but requested for my number to be shared with my father.

He wasn't expecting that, that was for damn sure.

But now he had my number, and finally... finally he was able to call. For the first time in months, he could call. Wherever he was, whoever he was with, whatever he was doing... he was finally well enough to call again.

One ring. Two rings, three. Four-

"(Y/n)," I heard my father say, and I downright beamed at the simple word. Remembering I had to respond, I did.

"Dad," I said happily. "You sound great. You sound healthy, actually. A lot better than..."

"Better than last time we talked? Yes, I'm doing much better, thankfully," he told me, and I could tell he was being honest. "But you - you're a high schooler, now! Which school is lucky enough to have you as a student?"

My smile grew upon answering, pride dripping from my voice though I tried my best to hide it. "Aoba Johsai."

"Aoba...! Whoa! Really?"

"Really," I affirmed, reaching over to my desk. On it was a printed photo of my trio on the first day of school this year. Adorned in our uniforms, we had met in front of Toru's home to walk together and his mom had taken a picture of us. We were all smiling in the photo, and...

It was selfish, it was. But it was something I wanted my father to have been a part of.

If I still lived with him, might we spend evenings at my house? Or might the divide in our ways of life have gotten in the way? We survived before - but with just me and my dad, it was hard. Now, I was in the legal custody of my aunt and uncle but they were much, much more well off.

No. Don't think like that. Focus! My friends aren't shallow enough to care - they wouldn't be. Besides, that wasn't important right now. What was important was my father, for it was so rare we could speak, nowadays.

"The school's beautiful," I told him. "It's a lot bigger than junior high, but it's been great so far."

"Classes aren't giving you too much trouble?"

I smiled ruefully, knowing he couldn't see it. If they did, what was he to do about it?

"No," I answered, thankfully being honest. "Besides, what I'm bad at, Oikawa and Iwaizumi are good at."

"Oh? Are those the same two from before?"

"Yes, dad," I said, laughing lightly. That was something he discussed every time we spoke. But he never seemed to remember them, nor their names, nor their relationship to me. "The same two from before. Still my best friends."

"That's great," he said. "But remember to make more friends than just those two."

"I know, I know," I said. "I'm making friends in all my classes, though. And I've got, like, the entire volleyball team behind me if I ever need anything."

"You're managing again?"

"Mm-hm," I hummed. "Why?"

"Is that what you want to do?"

"Yes," I answered. "Is that... bad?"

"No, not at all," he said. "I just know how this family is. I don't want you to feel like you need to do anything."

"At first, maybe that's how I felt," I admitted. "But that was back in junior high. I chose this for myself, now. I love it, really."

"You like bossing men around? Typical."

That made me laugh, but I did what I could to speak. "What's that mean?"

"Nothing, nothing," he said playfully.

"It's not that I like it," I said, referring specifically to bossing men around. "I'm just... really good at it."

Dad laughed boisterously. "That's my girl!"

When his laughter subsided, I worried my bottom lip between my teeth, and when I summoned the nerve and breath to speak, I did. "Dad?"

"Mm? Yes, sweetheart? This sounds important."

"If you're doing better," I said hesitantly, "then do you think that maybe you can..."

"Come home?"

"Yeah," I said quietly. "Please?"

I heard him sigh - one deeply resigned and sorrowful. "I'm so sorry, (Y/n). I can't. But you've got Tobio and Miwa, and-"

"Miwa left," I told him, and he was silent for a moment.

"Miwa left?"

"She left to go start her life," I told him. "She didn't have a chance to, before. Not while taking care of us, too."

"When did she leave?"

"Just before the school year started," I said. "She made sure I was alright, and that I had everything I needed, and... left."

"Dammit," he hissed. "I never meant for this... for you to be left alone. Dammit!"

"It's not your fault," I tried, but he clicked his tongue.

"Of course it is," he lamented. "Whose else would it be?"

"I..."

"More than anything else," he said surely, "none of this is your fault, (Y/n). You got that? None of it. I am doing all I can to get better, to get out of here, but it's hard. I want to be there for you so badly it hurts."

"I know," I said, tearing up. "But you are here for me. You love me, I know that. And, at least... at least you call. Others don't do that."

Knowing I was talking about his brother and his wife, he cursed again, under his breath. "That's not how this was supposed to go. And now you're forced to look after your cousin? You've only just started your first year, you're not even fourteen!"

"I can handle it," I tried hesitantly.

"I don't care if you can handle it," he argued. "You shouldn't have to!" He drew in a shaky, emotion-filled breath, then let it out slowly - an attempt to get his temper back in line. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. I didn't mean to yell."

"It's ok," I replied quietly, picking at a piece of lint in my blanket.

"No, it's not," he said right away. "None of this should be happening. And to happen to you... I'm so sorry. This isn't what I wanted for you."

Yes, that was obvious.

"I just want you to be here," I said, holding back a sob as best I could. I couldn't hold it when I heard a hitched breath from him - his emotions getting the better of him, too. "I miss you so bad."

"I know, sweetheart," he cooed, trying to make his voice strong despite the clear wavering in his breath, the frog in his throat. "I know. I love you so, so much."

It was clear in his voice that he was holding back tears, too. But he'd hold them in, at least until we hung up. Then he would cry.

And then... so would I.

—

I had tears in my eyes as I continued to laugh, and it got worse when I heard Hajime and Toru laughing, too. I was on my stomach after an absolutely pathetic attempt to receive one of Toru's serves. It was perhaps the most ungraceful series of movements that anyone in the history of humanity had ever attempted and somehow, I managed it.

Oh, yes.

I managed to not only miss the ball entirely, but I also managed to segment what should have been one continuous, fluid movement into, I don't know, maybe five - and still missed it, somehow! I managed to make a complete and utter fool of myself, but I did manage to make them laugh... So maybe it was worth it?

"(Y/n)," Hajime said, crouching down beside me. "What the hell was that?"

"I don't know," I said. "I was just trying to get the ball!"

"She tried to pancake, the poor thing," Toru said, smirking from his spot on the other side of the net. The ball had rolled back his way and he picked it up. "How about we forget that happened, and I serve again?"

I ceased my laughter only to glare up at him. The damn man had turned a jump serve into a soft one, and so I had to run to dive, only to miss the ball anyway. I could have gotten hurt - and he had the nerve to stand over there and smirk?

"I think we should forget that it happened," I provided, accepting Haji's hand when he held it towards me. He helped me up, and when I dusted myself off, continued. "I don't think you should serve again, though."

"Why not? Is it not your managerial recommendation that I practice my serves before the big game?"

"It is my managerial demand that you be nicer to me," I huffed. "I'm not good at this, you know that!"

"The only way to get better is to-"

"If you finish that thought," I said, "I'll give you a black eye before Haji can."

"Damn," Hajime said, a broad smile on his face. "I like this side of you."

"I don't!"

"You should've thought of that before tricking me like that!"

"You should've always known it'd be a possibility, knowing how I play!"

"You should've remembered who I am, and what I know! I can spill so many things on you!"

"You wouldn't dare!"

"I would!"

"Knock it off, both of you," Hajime said, pulling me away from Toru. With each passing threat from each of us, we'd gotten closer to the net - so close that by the end, we'd been nose-to-nose, the only thing between us being the net. And of course, there was the fact that he was taller than me.

As soon as Hajime pulled me away, Toru's playful glare wavered and he grinned, instead. I smiled too, and neither of us needed to be told that there were no hard feelings, because it was obvious.

"Sorry, sorry, (Y/n)-chan," Toru said. "Honestly, my serve toss was too far forward so my only option was to make it a soft toss.

"Oh," I said. "So, you messed up?"

"Well, no, because I served it anyway, so-"

"So you messed up," I confirmed. "So, not my fault. Right?"

"Er..."

"Right?"

"Right."

"Good," I said, turning away from him. "Now, back to the game. I want to beat his ass now."

With a nod, Toru turned and returned to his position. Hajime returned to the side of the court, just watching for now. What we were having was a playful bout - the boys wanted to let go of some tension before the practice game tomorrow, and so did I, honestly. When Toru suggested a playful match, I thought he meant between himself and Haji - not me and him. Still, it was fun, though I wasn't very good at it.

We got right back into the game, and Toru purposely hit a very slow, very light serve, one I could feasibly receive - and I did! I popped it right up, then set it for myself (kinda overdoing it, though), and I leapt up to pop it over the net. Because, of course, I couldn't spike it, no.They hadn't lowered the net for me despite my repeated pleas for them to so that I would be able to hit it over comfortably. It was just a recreational net in Toru's backyard, after all - they could've done it if they wanted to!

Toru received the ball easily, set to himself, then spiked it down for a point. "Dammit!"

"Come on," Toru said encouragingly. "You'll get it, (Y/n). Just keep trying."

Normally, those words from him might have sounded patronizing, but not now. Reinvigorated, I clambered back to my feet, then readied for another one of his serves.

—

I'd managed to hit the ball towards the far corner of the court that was the yard, and Toru had to run, tracking its arc over his shoulder as he ran. He dove, popping it upwards, then sprang to his feet to chase after it again.

Before I knew it, Haji was at my side, watching the ball eagerly. Thinking he was playing, I offered him up some room - only for him to follow, setting his hands on my hips in preparation for something. I watched the ball's downward arc, and watched as Toru set it up as best he could.

He was able to set it towards the net quite well, given the circumstances.

All the same, by the time he leapt up to spike it down, I was there, held up by Haji. I knew what this was, and it was a duel, and I let out a delighted peal of laughter as I put my all into shoving the ball over the net, out of his hands.

"No, wait-!"

Despite Toru's best efforts to dive for the ball, it was all for naught. The ball landed in the grass and I realized that, for the first time, I scored a point!

"Oh, my god! Wait... I did it! Haji, I did it!"

Haji didn't let me down, he only hefted me up to sit on his shoulder and I beamed, my smile surely brighter than the sun as I threw my hands upwards in celebration, in jubilation, in pure elation for what I'd just done.

When Toru got up, he patted himself off, then turned to look towards me. Seeing his gaze go up and up, I laughed when I saw his dumbfounded look and the way he shook his head incredulously and more than a bit indulgently.

"Toru," I exclaimed. "Did you see? I did it! I got a point!"

"I saw, (Y/n)-chan," he said warmly, ducking under the net to approach us. He set his hands on his hips and looked up at me. "But I'm still at set point. Finally your chance to serve, though."

"You asshole," I said, laughing all the while. A rush of wind blew through, and Haji did his best to hold onto me - but I quite simply was not used to being this tall and the wind was strong up here, and I began to fall backwards.

A shriek was just passing through my lips as I recognized the sensation of falling, of flailing limbs and of being at gravity's mercy. But I did not feel the ground. I made contact with something, though more accurately someone.

Before I knew what was happening, I was in Toru's arms, but he wasn't quite able to get a firm hold on me. He stumbled, and soon I was something like a battering ram, used to knock into Hajime. We all collapsed in a heap on the ground and as soon as we realized we were alright, we were good...

We were laughing again, so hard until our bellies ached and tears ran down our cheeks.

I wasn't sure how all of this would help me manage them better, but... it was fun, so it was worth it.