Hi its Gumball here. If you're reading this message please leave a message in the comments or otherwise please help me. ASAP. Thank you.

It's not like I'll die or anything... right? I always manage to get out of any situation, I mean, the closest I came to death was during  'The Finale' which I believe would be categorized as the fortieth episode of my second season of weirdly addictive adrenaline pumping episodes of pure hyperactivity.

After a total of 21 said episodes in six different seasons of my life, my voice cracking thrice despite having discovered the Ash Ketchum fountain of youth as well as being impersonated by a goat called Miracle Star (don't ask), I thought I'd be able to escape any situation no problem.

Wait... this is just another one of my episodes, isn't it? I mean, it isn't uncommon to start with a snapshot in media res but... that's it! A flashback!

It all began on a bright sunny day, the usual kind you get at Elmore. I was out minding my own business as usual - nothing strange yet which put me slightly on edge - until suddenly, and I mean like *poof* an anthropomorphic dragon appeared right smack in front of me. Naturally, I kept my distance but for some reason even after we've been through this like a bazillion times, Darwin still introduced himself- I guess I have myself to blame... It was I who bestowed upon him the gift of a humble abode but taking a fish home is a lot different then a freakin' six foot anthropomorphic dragon!

Anyway, that's when the weirdness started and coming from me 'weirdness' is really... ermmm... weird? So, anyway, this dragon thingymajiggy basically tagged along with us and although I swear we've never met - he knew everything about us! Not just us but about the "whole franchise" as he liked to call it. I mean, I'm not one to turn down a fan or anything but the way he knew everything seriously gave me the chills. I didn't like it. Not one bit. The solution? Well... talking it out would have been the normal thing to do but where's the fun it that? It was obvious- The best way to get rid of the problem was to kill it. I decided to slay the dragon.

In retrospect, putting on my wig and going Saiyan mode would have probably saved me a lot of trouble but flash-forward a few attempts at poison, nuclear warheads and plain old backstabbing among other things, I soon came to realise that I was the only one who hated him -oh, and Alan as well of course. He was just to perfect. Alan wanted to team up but whoever said 'the enemy of my enemy is my friend' clearly didn't understand the joy of literally popping ones bubble.

Flash forward some more and I'm running away from my entire townsfolk, even Darwin. It seems they- hold on! Who put that cliff there?