I look at everyone eating their food happily, then looked back at my plate.. I wasn't hungry at all, why? I just eat to survive it seems.. I pushed the plate away, and walked outside NK's house...
Grabbing my car keys with the guards, I ran away from everyone.. Akira calls me and I'm not in mood to explain my act now, today so many incidents made me remember that woman... I don't want to stay nor talk with anyone now.. Need my space alone..
I reached the place that gives me fake peace..
I enter in my farmhouse, a secret one, no one knows about this place except Khushi.. I only showed her this place, only if I knew what's going to happen in my life, only if I knew she would break my heart, she wasn't worthy my trust..
My room, a dark one with old furnitures .. I don't even want to change it, all the things here have been touched by her, it's the only place I feel she is still with me, the only place that makes me love her again, because when I leave this house I only hate Khushi, only bad memories of her surround me..
" Khushi Kumari Gupta..." I stare at her pic in my room, this room is filled with our pictures..
Flashback
I look at the way kids were playing with her...
But someone blocked my beautiful view, I frown looking at the person who dared to do that...
" What the... " I look up and realized it was her sister..
" Sorry sir... May I help you?" she looked at me scared, she doesn't have an idea why did I said " What the.." frowning to her, she probably thinks she did something wrong that's why I got angry..
I quickly changed my expression to my normal one.. " Black coffee" , she nodded and went from there...
I looked again to see that angel, but to my bad luck she isn't there anymore..
" ASR what exactly you want in this coffee shop?" Aman asks me raising his eyebrow, at least he uses his brain, he knows I don't want to drink coffee here but I'm on a different mission..
" Angel.." I grinned at him..
" Angel? Who? " Aman once again ask me getting confused..
" Let it be Aman.. You won't understand .." I sigh, when I'm not understanding what's happening with me , what can I explain to him?
" And you can go now.. I want to be alone here." I said looking at him..
He looks at me suspiciously, then left the shop..
" Your coffee sir.." finally I hear her sweet voice..
I smile brightly, then seeing people looking at me, I reduced that bright smile from my face..
" Hi.. Remember me?" I know fool question.. She can't see me, so its obvious she doesn't even know a face like mine exist on earth..
" Huh sorry sir... But by your voice, I think you came here yesterday right? " she makes a confused face, then smiles after getting a clue of who I might be..
" Yes I'm the same one.. My name is Arnav Singh Raizada.." I said once again smiling, something I never do in usual days.. I did two times in nearly 2 minutes..
" My name is Khushi Kumari Gupta..Sir is it true you're the fashion king in London? Sorry, I was watching TV with my sister yesterday and we saw your news.. Ohh you must be wondering how I watched TV when I'm blind.. My jiji tells me everything that is showing on TV that's how I watch it.. " she says smiling..
" Yes it's true... " I said a bit uncomfortable with my truth, is she going to treat me the way everyone does? Is she going to talk with me well and with respect just because I'm ASR?
" Wow.. Congrats sir.. You're on top of the world... " she smiled clapping her hands like a baby..
" Please one autograph sir.." she says pleading to me, I didn't like it at all..
" I will not give you any autograph.." I say frowning at her..
She looks sad, her eyes glistened.. Oh my.. Is she going to cry? ..
" Khushi why are you crying?" her sister comes running to us..
I quickly got up from my seat..
" Nothing Jijii... Rich people are really bad.. " she said crying more, and I felt guilty..
" Look I just wanted to say that I want to be your friend.. And friends don't give each other autographs right?" I ask trying to calm her down.. Her sister is already looking at me with big eyes for making her angel cry..
" My friend? Really.. Jiji ASR wants to be my friend.. " she said smiling again, and I sigh in relief.. Uff..
" Haan Khushi.. Do you accept it?" her sister ask her smiling..
Khushi nodded happily making me smile for the third time now in a day.. Di won't believe this.. I smiled that too three times..
" Okay Khushi, now we are friends.. Have to go now.. See you.." I said then picked my phone to go.
" Bye bye.. ASR sir.. " she said smiling and waving to me, unfortunately she can't see me that's why she is not waving exactly to me..
" Call me Arnav .." I said while going away..
Flashback ends..
" Why did you leave me Khushi? .." I say almost crying.. How more will I be strong?
Urghh I'm supposed to hate her, now why am I wasting my tears for her? Just why?
I left the room, and head back to NK's house to take Akira back home..
As I entered the house, Akira came running to me..
" Where did you go?" she asks looking at me, to check if I'm alright..
Yeah, I look perfectly alright from outside, only inside me I can hear my heart breaking in pieces and I'm the only one who feels this pain, the pain of being away of someone you loved so much..
" I went somewhere.. No more questions, let's go back, otherwise your father will start scolding you.." I say holding her hand, then looked at my friends indicating that I'm going, they nod at me..
" Arnav stop the car.. Candy floss please.." she shouts excitedly looking at the Candy floss vendor, I was driving the car but had to stop to buy what she wants..
I went to buy and came back handling it to her..
" Thanks.. You know I wonder why you care so much for me? I mean you don't look like someone who has patience to do all this to a girl, but with me its different.." Akira says smiling..
" Then be happy about that.." I replied with my stern face, I hate explaining myself..
I stopped the car in front of her house..
" Bye Arnav.." she kisses my cheek and went away smiling..
I head to my house... Oh my house, doesn't look like one.. No one lives with me, and the owner only comes at night time, or sometimes I sleep in NK house.. I hate being in my house.. Yeah it only makes me go back to my past.. Whenever I stay alone, my past comes to chat with me..
***********
" Khushi.. K...don't leave me...Khushi...Noooooooo" Dammit I woke up sweating, nightmare.. Worst nightmare of my life.. Even in my sleep she pokes her nose.. I drink the water quickly.. I won't be able to sleep again, what's left now?
Leaving my bed, I take baby steps and went to the poolside of my room..
I really wonder what she must be doing in her life now.. Must be really happy after breaking my heart..
Flashback..
" Hahaha.. Really Arnav.. Girls love you.. Wish I could see your face.." Khushi said to me smiling..
" They don't love me, are only interested in my money Khushi.. You want to see my face? Okay let me describe myself... I'm handsome, handsome, handsome.." I said laughing with my friend, Khushi she has become very close to me in these two weeks.. I come here every morning to talk with her..
" Acha.. Handsome.. You must be an old man.. Like those rich men, fat with grumpy face.. Hahahaa" Khushi says laughing.. I also joined her..
" Arnav beta you're here... Areee Prakash bring coffee for Arnav beta.. Why are you delaying?" Garima aunty shouted at the worker.. She also is very close to me now.. In fact the three of them became my best friends.. I love spending time with them, this place seems heaven for me now..
" It's okay aunty.. I'm with your non stop talking princess.. I don't even know when time passes by.." I say smiling, which for now is something normal for me to do..
She smiles caressing my cheeks then went back to work.. You know Mom also get jealous of Garima aunty, she thinks Aunty will take her place..
" Arnav.. Why did you stop? Tell me what else happened in your office?" Khushi calls me and we continued chatting..
Flashback ends..
" Akira what is this?" early in the morning she makes me get angry.. Yesterday nightmare wasn't enough, that I had to find another nightmare in form of a dress design..
" Arnav its beautiful, everyone liked it.. What's your problem?" she ask with a lazy face..
" I have no problem with the dress.. Just change this color.." I said giving attention to my laptop now..
" Color? But why? Don't you like red now? Seriously its the best color for this dress.. People will like it.. " Akira says while showing me again the design..
" I hate this color.. Do you get that? " I replied shoving away the papers..
She looks at the papers scattered on the floor then at me: " Because its Khushi's favorite color right?" she asks me angrily..
" Yes its her favorite color, and I hate everything that has to do with her.." I said shouting..
" This shows you haven't forget her yet.." she also shows me her angry side..
" I already said to you that she means nothing to me now... Go back to work.." I say..
" Then why do you keep her pic in your wallet.. If she means nothing to you why do your every action proves the opposite?" she is now challenging me..
" Who gave you the right to check my wallet now? " I ask her clenching my jaws..
" I'm your girlfriend.." she replies to me as if I don't know..
" You're not my wife yet.. Don't touch my things without my permission... And I love you.. Khushi is my past.. I only care for you now.." I say taking Khushi's pic out of my wallet, then threw it in the dustbin..
" Happy now?" I ask her sarcastically..
" Very happy.. And I love you too" Akira says smiling and went out of my cabin..
I leaned on my chair closing my eyes tightly.. Shifting my attention to the dustbin, I went near it again taking Khushi's pic with me.. I wipe it and placed it again in my wallet.. My heart doesn't accept what I did..
Yeh rooh bhi meri
Yeh jism bhi mera
Utna meta nahin
Jitna hua Tera
(My soul, my body.. Does not belong to me as much as it does to you) ..
" ASR we have a meeting now.. Shall we go?" Aman comes in, and I nod..
After the meeting..
" Aman when am I supposed to go Shimla? " I ask Aman while walking out of the conference room..
" Tomorrow ASR.." he says looking at me..
" Do you want me to go with you?" he ask me again, now I don't understand why? Does he think I'm a baby who can't take care of myself?
" No need.." I enter in my cabin..
" Akira? Do you need something?" l ask her while closing the door..
" Yes, Aman told me you're going out tomorrow.. So I booked movie tickets for us.. You will go with me right?" she hugs me while inviting me to this boredom..
" Okay.." I say hugging her back...
" Okay then.. I will be ready..you come to pick me.." she looks at me with her eyes shining in happiness..
" No, change in my house.. We will go directly together.." I reply and she smiles nodding..
As she goes, I engrossed myself in my work..
By 6pm I took Akira to my house, I showed her the room to change..
While I go to my room to freshen up..
" Arnav why am I not allowed in your room?" once again!!
" Akira after marriage this room will be yours okay?" I said closing the door of my room angrily... This was a lie, this room is only for me and Khushi..
How can I forget?
Flashback..
" Guess what?" I ask her..
" What Arnav?" she replies me confused..
" I'm planning to settle here in Delhi.. So you will help me choose a perfect mansion to me right?" I say and close my ears.. I know she will scream in happiness now..
" What? Arnav you're going to stay here... DM thank you so much.... Yes you won't go back... Yess.. Yayyyyyyyy" she screams happily making everyone on the road look at us..
She spread her arms indicating that she wants to hug me.. I smile and hugged her..
" But how will I help you? I can't even see my house. .. " she said hugging me tightly, I can feel she is sad..
" Khushi don't cry.. You only said to me that day the fact you're blind doesn't stop you from doing normal things.. Then why are you losing hope now? I will describe everything to you and you will choose what house you like.. Simple.." I said breaking the hug to wipe her tears..
" I want to see your face.." she plead to me pouting..
" Okay caress my face with your hand.." I hold her hand bringing it near my face..
She does that smiling.. I know she isn't seeing me, but in that way she will recognize me easily now..
" Let's go.. I need to show you the mansion for sale.." I hold her hand and we went to my car..
The driver started the car, while Khushi was sitting with me at the back seat..
" Arnav you will buy jalebi for me later right? " she is literally ordering me..
" Yes I will buy.." I say smiling, the driver is giving us looks like " Aww so sweet" .. I glare at him and he stopped smiling and concentrated on his work..
After checking almost 5 mansions, Khushi didn't like anything..
" I liked the second one.. I think we should buy it Khushi.." I said opening the door of the car and making her sit first.
" No Arnav.. I want a perfect house for you.. Just like the way I dream mine to be.. Have patience we will find a beautiful mansion for you" she says assuring me, even though I was tired, for this woman I would do anything..
" Wow Arnav.. Buy this mansion.. I love it.. It has a poolside.. " she claps her hands excitedly as she found the mansion of her dreams..
I quickly nodded and went to complete the formalities...
Flashback ends..
This is your favorite room, how can I let someone enter here? This poolside has a lot of your memories... I don't want to give your place to anyone..
I quickly took bath and dressed up, called Aman and NK to joins us..
" Akira let's go.." I shouted, women take too much time to get ready, Khushi wasn't like this..
" What the..." I said looking at Akira.. How dare she wear this dress?
" How am I looking Arnav? " she said showing the dress to me...
" Akira who said for you to wear this dress? " I clenched my fist..
" I found it in that room.. Its beautiful more than the dress you kept for me.." Akira replies to me pouting..
" This dress only belongs to Khushi, do you get that? Now go and change it.. Fast.." I shouted losing patience with this girl now..
She went back running to change it.. Now she will blame for making her cry, when she was the one who did this mistake..
Flashback..
" Khushi try this dress.." I look at the dress which I think will fit perfectly for her..
" Arnav no.. How will I try? " she say trying to drag me out of the mall..
" I will say to someone to help you change it okay?" I patted her cheeks..
" No.. I don't feel comfortable.. Please let's go.." she said sad.. I really didn't mean to hurt her..
" Okay Khushi, I will buy this dress for you then you ask Payal to help you.."
She nodded immediately..
" Sorry Khushi.. I didn't mean to hurt you, just wanted to see you in this dress.. My intention was not to remind yourself of your condition.. So sorry.." I said feeling guilty, it would be awkward if someone helps her to dress up, as they would feel pity of her and she didn't want that..
" Arnav what are you talking? I know you're my friend.. You will never hurt me.." smiling at me she said those words that calmed my heart..
Flashback ends..
" Are you angry?" I ask Akira who was silent in the car..
" No" she curtly replied..
" Good.." I said, better for me..
" Arnav seriously.. Do you still love her? "
" How many times I have to say that I hate her? " I look at her furrowing my brows..
" No you don't... You still remember everything of her.. If you still love her, then leave me.. Let me live my life also.." she looks away..
" You will not leave me.. You're mine, only mine.." I said looking at her...
" You're obsessed with me.. Because love.. You only love her.." she smiles sarcastically..
" So what if I'm obsessed with you? And listen to one thing stop talking about her everytime.. And don't try to reach her place.. "
" I'm not trying to be her.. You're making me like her.. Tell me who told me to wear salwar kameez just like Khushi used to wear ahn? You right? " she fights back with me..
Reaching the cinema place, I stopped the car..
" Go.. "
" What? Now you will leave me alone with your friends? " she asks me in disbelief..
" Yes.. Lav is also there.. You already spoiled my mood, what do you expect now? Whenever I'm in good mood you bring Khushi's talks here.. Now spend time alone.." I said opening the car's door so that she could go out..
She goes away angrily..
**************
I went back home to pack my bags.. Tomorrow will be a tiring day for me..
Leaving the bag near my bed, I leaned on my recliner switched on the TV and started watching some random shows..
A particular scene took me to Khushi's memories again!!!
Flashback..
I reached the coffee shop as usual in the morning, went towards Payal to ask where is Khushi..
" She went with her friends to play in the park.. Its near here Arnav.." Payal said to me smiling..
I nodded and went to this park.. As I reached I see Khushi running while playing with the kids from her colony.. I quickly went running to her as I noticed she was about to bump with a tree there..
" Khushi be careful.." I hold her while she looked confused..
" You were about to hurt yourself with the tree here.. What's the need to do all this?" I explain while scolding her.. If something bad happens to her, I will die..
" Ohh sorry Arnav" she said holding her ears cutely..
" It's okay.. Be careful please, I won't be here all time to save you right? " I said trying to put some sense in her..
" Why? You will be here with me everytime.. " she said while wiping tears that were leaving her eyes, now I'm wondering what did I said that is making her cry..
" Khushi don't cry.. Okay I will be here everytime.. Don't cry.." I hugged her.. After sometime I smile, we have become very close to each other in these two months..
Flashback ends..
I hate you, but my heart still loves you a lot.. this heart will never forget you, it’s yours Khushi.. Arnav Singh Raizada only belongs to you…