Eat food, drink "water", and get 5+ hours of sleep tonight or you'll be forced to do a sudden presentation in class this Friday, and everyone will laugh at u<3

Hot bitches (And Y/n) groupchat
0 online

Y/n is now online

Y/n
The name🤨🤨

Y/n
R we gonna have some issues
here Hisoka??🤨🤨

2 people are now online

Whoresoka🥴
That wasn't me, my dear ♡

Buzz Buzz Motherfucker🤬🐝
Maybe you should listen to me next
time, and not call Hisoka after directly
being told not to

Y/n
>:0

Y/n
Sry I didn't realize I had to follow ur orders
like a dog, Chrollo😊

Buzz Buzz Motherfucker🤬🐝
You do, I expect more obedience going
forward, understood?

Y/n
I-

🤕Mean Girl is now online🤕

🤕Mean Girl🤕
He thinks he's in charge of everyone

🤕Mean Girl🤕
But I do agree, obey next time

🤕Mean Girl🤕 is now offline

Y/n
Ouch :<

Y/n changed Buzz Buzz Motherfucker🤬🐝's name to Backstabber
Y/n changed 🤕Mean Girl🤕's name to Big Meanie

Y/n
>:(

Backstabber
Devastating.

Y/n
Sgit up

Y/n
Don't

Y/n
Don't you dare

Y/n
Don't you fucking dare, Chrollie

Backstabber
Deciding

Y/n
Decide that it's safer to not<33 (I'm in
your house)

Backstabber
That's cute, I could be in your home in
less than a week, if I so desired

Y/n
I-

Y/n
Hisoka Chrollo is being a big meanie

Whoresoka🥴
And what would you like me to do about
that? ♧

Y/n
What ur best at??

Y/n
Annoying people??

Whoresoka🥴
That's what I'm best at? ♤

Big Meanie is now online

Big Meanie
Yes

Big Meanie is now offline

Backstabber
For once, I agree with Illumi

Y/n
Yeah it's 3v1, Hisoka

Y/n
:P

Whoresoka🥴
You switch sides quickly, darling~

Y/n changed Whoresoka🥴's name to Ronald McDonald
Ronald McDonald changed their name to ⭐️Ronald McDonald💧

Y/n
Acceptable ig

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Thank you for the permission~

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Unnecessary but much appreciated ♡

Y/n
Kys

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
No, thank you, my dear~

Y/n
I will slowly eat all the insulation in ur
house, so that it gets progressively colder
and colder, until its even colder inside than
it is out

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
I'm flattered, though I'd simply buy a
new house~

Y/n
U can just.. do that...???? In this
economy??

Backstabber
You say that like they're hard to come
by

Y/n
Mon..ey?

Backstabber
Yes, money

Y/n
Own house? In this economy???

Backstabber
Multiple houses

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
They seem to be having some issues♡

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
How I adore watching the simple minded struggle~

Backstabber
Hisoka, please calm yourself

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
They're so adorable as they figure things
out~⭐️

Big Meanie is now online

Big Meanie
Quiet down and give them a moment to comprehend

Big Meanie is now offline

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Mmm, oh? Since when did you care?

Big Meanie is now online

Big Meanie
I don't care, do not twist my words

Big Meanie is now offline

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Ah, but Lulu~

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
They'll still require some guidance~

Backstabber
We're all well aware

Y/n
Green?? Moneuy?

Backstabber
Yes, dear. Money

Y/n
Hgow

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
That's unimportant, my dearest~

Y/n
Explsyn??

Backstabber
Here to help😘

Big Meanie is now online

Big Meanie
Oh joy, it's you

Big Meanie is now offline

Backstabber
😒

Backstabber
Y/n, listen carefully, okay baby??

Y/n
Wgat

Backstabber
123 eyes on me

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Interesting approach~

Y/n
Listmening

Backstabber
💞We could buy one direction💞

Y/n
UGGHGUCYTCGCHVJB

Backstabber
I think they get it now, Shalnark out🫡

Backstabber
I'm starting to realize how far this so
called "twink language" goes

Y/n
CHROLY MONEUN

Backstabber
Yes, yes, money

Y/n
GIBE??

Big Meanie is now online

Big Meanie
Don't beg, it's obnoxious

Big Meanie is now offline

Y/n
Sry

Y/n
I humbly request a loan that I shall never
even attempt to pay off in any shape
way or form

Y/n
You are not allowed to learn why or how I
use this money that you are "loaning" me

Y/n
You will get no compensation in return
either

Y/n
(Please)

Big Meanie is now online

Big Meanie
You almost did well

Big Meanie is now offline

Y/n
🥹

Backstabber
Will you be questioning how we got the
money in the first place?

Y/n
Only if the authorities come after me, then
I'm saying it was Hisoka's fault

Backstabber
Good

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
⭐️-_-💧

Backstabber
I'll have Shal send you some

Backstabber
(Shalnark here, this is all happening
against my will 🥰)

Y/n
Monemy?

Big Meanie is now online

Big Meanie
Pathetic

Big Meanie is now offline

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
I, for one, find it quite amusing~

Y/n
Hvcggccgcgcfffctfc olease

Backstabber
(Chrollo already knows your information,
idk why, I recommend increasing the
amount of locks in ur house🐌👍)

Y/n
removijg locls

Y/n
joim me chroltj

Backstabber
(He said "soon" and nothing else???)

Y/n
🥹

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
I'm almost jealous

Y/n
u can come too

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Oh? ♢

Y/n
Npt lile that

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Mmh, what a pity~

Y/n
By uvhvhvuhvhvjb ur lucky you all r
hot

Big Meanie is now online

Big Meanie
I would not refer to having you, of all
people, as being lucky

Big Meanie
You are not appealing as you believe
yourself to be

Big Meanie is now offline

Y/n
ur not invited

Backstabber
Chrollo said that was wise decision, one
of the smartest you've ever made

Backstabber
He also said "Phone, Shalnark. Now."

Backstabber
Dunno why he'd say sometimes ng like
that to me😖😖

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Watch your spelling~

Y/n
Chrollie would never make such
mistakes🤕

Y/n
I miss him already

Backstabber
Oh, okay, I see how it is

Backstabber
Who's side are you even on?

Backstabber
🙄

Y/n
In my defense, u could be ugly

Backstabber
One fucking second ur getting a picture
of me, bitch

Y/n
You love me😘

Backstabber
I'd flirt back, as a joke, but Chrollo would probably kill me if I did(???)

Y/n
Tell him I love him

Backstabber
No<3

Y/n
Then at least give me that photo🙄

Backstabber
And if I don't?

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧 sent 1 photo

Y/n
BARKBARLBAROBARKBARK

Backstabber
Where'd you get that🤨

Backstabber
Hisoka where'd you get that🤨🤨🤨

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Be a good dog, and don't ask questions~

Y/n
Me next me nexy menect

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Oh?~

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Get on your hands and knees, and then
we'll talk~

Y/n
Ivivjgufyftdtjbnjni I'm at work, don't
dothif to meuvhbvhvbjjbvh

Backstabber
Hisoka please refrain from taking
unwarranted pictures of the others,
thank you

Y/n
fuckkkfuckfuck fuck you all

Y/n
Fuck fuck die die die fick

Backstabber
Hm?

Backstabber
Hisoka, explain

Big Meanie is now online

Big Meanie
I believe they've turned pathetic enough
to gain romantic attachment from
just texting

Backstabber
I believe what you're trying to say is fall
in love, I can see how that'd be a difficult phrase for someone like you to understand, however

Big Meanie
It's the same thing, don't bother
correcting synonymous statements

Big Meanie
And, as I was saying, they are just in
denial about their so-called feelings

Backstabber
I'm sure your familiar with that so-called denial

Big Meanie
Please cease to exist at the nearest
possible convenience

Backstabber
If it gets me away from you, gladly

Big Meanie
Marvelous, it was a displeasure meeting
you

Backstabber
Likewise 

Big Meanie is now offline

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
I believe we moved on from our dear
Y/n's sudden realization of their feelings~

Y/n
Shyvjbjyfvjvjhvvj sjut up

Backstabber
I have a feeling you're overly dramatizing
it, and shut*

Y/n
How am I supposed to feel hot if all of
you look like that

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
Mmh?~ Do you need more praise? Is
that it?

Y/n
Ur foing this on purpmtse

Y/n
I'm leabong

Y/n is now offline
Big Meanie is now online

Big Meanie
You scared them off, Hisoka

Backstabber
He has a tendency to have that effect
on people

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
They'll coming crawling back soon
enough~

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧 is now offline

Backstabber
They better

Big Meanie
You get attached too fast, Lucilfer

Backstabber
I take what I want, and I want them.

Big Meanie
Until they bore you

Backstabber
Go back to following your father's orders
like a dog, and stay out of issues that don't involve you, Zoldyck.

Backstabber is now offline

Big Meanie
Brat.

Big Meanie is now offline
⭐️Ronald McDonald💧 is now online
⭐️Ronald McDonald💧 has deleted 6 texts

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧
You give away so much information when annoyed, my dears ♡

⭐️Ronald McDonald💧 is now offline

Word Count: 1535

Fun Facts:

• This is a prime example on why I shouldn't write while fake-flirting with my friend. Too lazy to fix the chapter though (Edit: went and fixed some parts of the chapter.)

• Since you all wanted Shalnark so badly, there he is🙄🙄🙄🙄 (I love Shalnark with a burning passion.)

• To the people who hate Hisoka, you're gonna be suffering a lot as this book moves on💞💞🥰🥰