ADRENALINE — CHAPTER 31
karaoke with a side of bad decisions

don't read if you're easily triggered by domestic violence !!

12th december 2023
phoebe's point of view

time seems to be slowing down as i look at the closed door to my house.

dylan said he'd be back by 10, it's 11:56.

every part of me wishes i went home with jacob tonight, but i think i messed everything up.

fuck this, i am not gonna be the girl who sits up at home waiting for her boyfriend who probably hasn't even given her a second thought all night.

i go into the room that i've always left my emotions in, my music room.

i grab my guitar, playing the tune jack had sent me a few weeks ago for a few minutes before thinking of some lyrics.

"you should take it as a compliment that i got drunk and made fun of the way you talk"

"and i've got a boyfriend he's older than us, he's away doing i don't know what"

"you should take it as a compliment that im talking to everyone here but you"

"you're so gorgeous, i can't say anything to your face, cause look at your face"

i string together some random lyrics when the door opens "babe?" i hear dylan's voice from the entry.

leaving the room i go towards him, he leaves a peck on my lips "hey im so sorry, i really just had to-" he makes excuses until i interrupt him.

"we're done" i say gently, emotionally i've been checked out of this relationship since it began.

he laughs like im joking "pheebs come on" he chuckles, he's not taking me seriously, i can tell he's drunk, i don't know where he was tonight but i know it was definitely not something he 'had to do'.

"it's been a long night why don't you come and pick up your stuff in the morning" i say, wanting him out of my house, i'm honestly not sober enough myself to deal with this.

"phoebe you're drunk you're not thinking relationally" he talks to me like i'm five.

"dylan just go".

that's when the slam happens, it's sudden, my back is up against the wall, his lips on mine.

"dylan get off me" my words are muffled against his lips.

"no".

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1st december 2021

the hit.

right across my face.

we were play fighting with pillows, i must've hit too hard, his hand comes across my right cheek quickly and harshly.

immediately i see the regret wash over his face.

"pheebs..." he whispers, almost like he can't believe what he just did.

i'm frozen, i feel small compared to him, he has the power over me.

he wraps his arms around me.

"i'm so sorry i'm so sorry i'm so sorry"

he whispers into my neck like a prayer.

"it's okay..." i whisper out.

"phoebe im so sorry i'll never do it again".

"you'll never do it again?" i whisper.

he shakes his head, begging for forgiveness "im so sorry it was a reflex, i'll never ever again... i can't believe i did that... i'm a horrible person... i'll never do it again".

and i believed him.

i'm so stupid.

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12th december 2023

his body is pulled off mine, it's a blur.

i hear yelling for a few moments before the door slams, i can't bring myself to open my eyes.

"phoebe" i hear dominic's voice "phoebe are you okay?"

my breath is shaky, i open my eyes, letting out a nod.

"are you okay?" he repeats "i need to hear you say you're okay".

"i'm okay..." i breathe out.

"did he do anything to you?" he asks concerned.

i shake my head.

"why are you here?" i ask shakily.

"isabel wanted to take you to karaoke... she heard what happened with jacob... i'll tell her we're gonna stay in and order some fo-"

i interrupt him "no... no i wanna get out".

"you're sure?" dominic asks, i nod.

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13th december 2023

a thousand drinks later it's 4:05am.

sabrina is singing a nonsense christmas into the karaoke microphone.

gigi is sitting annoyed that she's overshadowing her last christmas performance "alright i need agua" she says, getting up and going to the bar.

i laugh softly as just dominic and i are left in the booth.

what i love about dominic is he's not forcing me to talk about what happened with dylan earlier, i know if i need to talk to him i can, but he's never gonna pressure me.

"thank you" i mouth to him.

he rolls his eyes and pushes me away playfully.

i laugh softly.

"you know something dom, you are one of my favourite people" i say drunkingly.

"right back at ya' pheebs" he chuckles lowly.

he flings an arm around me, i yawn and rest my head on his shoulder.

"ready to head home? i'll split a cab with you" he offers.

"yeah that's probably for the best".

we bid a few goodbyes before getting in the backseat of the taxi.

the cab ride is filled with sloppy kisses and drunken whispered words.

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t's notes
2 chapters in one night look at me go. anyways i wanted to stress that i have not experienced domestic violence, so writing this i tried my best to brush past it as quick as possible, please let me know if writing about a real person (who literally has a heart of gold) doing something like this could be taken as offensive, i was considering not writing about this at all because it is something so sensitive and probably can't be handled tastefully in a wattpad fanfiction about jacob elordi, but it does stay relevant throughout the book and hopefully can describe why phoebe makes the decisions she does
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