Thinking Out Loud - Ed Sheeran

ISABELLA

The mouth watering aroma of oregano and tomato drifted throughout the spacious apartment.

I sat back on the leather couch, sipping on a glass of La Pin red wine. The aftermath of a delicious dinner still sitting at the pit of my stomach. The sweet sounds of Louis Armstrong's What A Wonderful World drifted throughout the apartment. I laid my head back against the couch, my eyes shut, as I absorbed the words that were sang around me. The smooth taste of the red wine slipped through my lips, gliding it's way down my throat. In this moment I was content.

"Babe?" I was snapped out of my dream like state. My eyes fluttered open only to be met with a pair of flustered blue eyes. "What are you thinking about?" He held my body closer to his own. I could feel the heat radiating off of him through the thin layer of my silk shift dress. His thumb ran up and down my exposed arm, sending a shiver down my spine.

"Nothing really." I said, my eyes focused on his lips and back on his piercing blue ones. "Dinner was amazing," I whispered. My fingers threaded through his hair. "Thank you." I kissed his lips lightly, pulling back and laying my head on his shoulder.

"You're welcome, El." He kissed the top of my head. His face buried into my neck, his arms holding me tight. As we sat there, La Vie En Rose began to play. "I love this song," He muttered. I softly hummed in response.

"It's beautiful." I whispered, my fingers still playing with his hair.

"I like you, Izzy. I like you a lot." He whispered into my skin. His lips leaving a trail of kisses down my neck and back up to my jaw.

"I like you too," I whispered back. I take another sip of my wine.

Everything in this moment felt right. A man holding me tight. A man who liked me and cared about me. I felt safe. He was safe. This was safe.

Chase began to sing along with Louis Armstrong's strong voice. His sweet voice drifting into the warm apartment. "Hold me close and hold me fast, the magic spell you cast, this is la vie en rose."

"I didn't know you sang," I pulled my head back so that our eyes met. His cheeks were flushed a light pink.

"Only to my shower, and pretty girls that sit on my lap." He winked, leaving a soft kiss to my cheek.

"I like it. You have a nice voice."

Chase smiled at me before whispering a simple, "Thank you."

We continued to sit in the living room of his lavish apartment. It was in these moments that I tend to forget that Chase too came from a life of wealth. Our lives were so similar in that way. He was a reminder of what I came from. I began wonder why he worked at the grocery store if he lived here. His parents were clearly supporting him as he finished school. If that was the case, then why was he working?

"Can I ask you something?" Chase looked over to me.

"Of course, babe."

I looked into his eyes. They were so soft and inviting. So safe. "If your parents are well off and helping you out, why do you work at the grocery store?"

Chase let out a loud scoff his eyes rolling. "My father said that I needed to get a job and learned how to work for my money. He helps me pay for this apartment and my schooling, but said that I need to learn what it means to earn my livings. Be man or some shit like that. It's pathetic really. Once I'm done with school than I will be making tons of money. But no, I have to work at a stupid grocery store because that was all I could get. It's ridiculous really but whatever."

"But don't you think it's fulfilling to know that you earned your money? That you don't have to rely on your parents for it? You're twenty-four." I asked, my eyebrow quirked up in simple curiosity.

It amazed me that he didn't think it was important to work for what you have. Growing up, that was something that my father had always engrained into my mind. I was annoyed when I had to get a part time job in high school, but I am so grateful for it now. Grateful that my dad taught me the importance of working for your money and to not always rely on them for everything. Even though they still spoiled us with clothes and a car, it was great to know that if I wanted to get something for myself, I could buy it. Not mommy and daddy. It perplexed me that Chase didn't see it that way.

"That's why I'm in school, El." He replied, his voice growing more stern. "Once I'm done I can quite this shit job, tell my dad that I did it, then I can work and be filthy rich." He laughed. "My dad is just a ridiculous old man, too stuck into the way of the past. He worked so that he could provide for his family. I'm his family. I'm his son. His money is my money. I shouldn't have to work a stupid job when he can clearly pay for my expenses until I'm done school."

"That's a bit arrogant don't you think?"

"Not at all."

"Yes, our parents work to provide for us when we were children. But you're an adult now. You shouldn't have to rely on your own parents for your own needs and wants. You are more than capable to provide for yourself." I retorted. I was starting to get a bit annoyed by his arrogance. This was why I wanted to get away from my old lifestyle. It was this mindset that I hated. "This is why I left home in the first place. I don't get people who think like this."

"Izzy," Chase sighed. "You are lucky. You have been given a life that people would kill for. You have wealth, stability, happiness. Why run away from that?"

"No, that's my parents wealth, stability and happiness." I argued. "I want to work for my own money." I sat up, moving away from his lap. "Besides, money doesn't equal happiness. Money can destroy lives. It creates arrogant ideals that can hurt innocent people. I don't want to be a part of that. I want to make my own life and my own happiness."

"And that's why you work at a stupid bookstore?" He laughed. His voice not far from mockery. "Baby, let me provide for you. You're my girlfriend now. You don't need to work."

"You mean your parents can provide for me." I quipped.

"Touché." He chuckled, pulling me back into his arms.

"I'm not going to quit working. I love working. I'm not going to be some rich housewife when I get older. Not like my mother. That's why I went to school."

"I think it's cute that you want to work." He chuckled.

"It's not cute. It's called being independent, Chase."

"I think it's cute that you want to be independent." He laughed once again, clearly trying to joke about my life.

"You're kinda being a jerk right now." I whispered.

"I'm sorry Ella." He wrapped his arms around me, holding me tight. "I don't want to talk about this anymore. It's a silly conversation."

I did not think this was silly at the least. I found his mindset on life a bit unnerving. I never liked arrogant men. That was one of the many reasons I didn't date when I was back home. It was a major turn off for me. I liked men who worked for themselves, who didn't conform to the lifestyles of our parents. That was why I liked Ty so much. Even though we were never romantic, he had involuntarily set a standard for me for what I wanted in a man; what I wanted in a relationship.

Even though Chase was not up to those full standards, something that I was beginning to realize, he still was the sweetest man I knew. Regardless of his arrogance, he was kind to me. He cared for me and I liked him.

He was still maturing. But, weren't we all? We were still in our twenties, figuring out life. I wasn't going to let this change the way that I felt about him. I knew that in time he would mature out of this. Especially once he finished school and started working full time.

-

"Cake or pie?" I looked at Harry as he furrowed his brows in concentration. We were sitting in Brerin's drinking tea and talking about what we liked. It was always fun when I was with him. He was carefree and had a I-don't-give-two-shits attitude that I found interesting.

"Pie." He answered. "Hands down."

"Why?" I asked, curious as to why he chose pie. I was a cake kind of girl myself.

"A pie has so many options. You can have any kind of pie. It's fucking delicious." He laughed taking another sip of his tea.

"Fair point."

A vibration buzzed over the table. I looked at my phone, noticing an unknown number. "Sorry, I should take this." Harry nodded, taking a bite from the muffin in front of him.

"Hello?"

"Is this Isabella Maxwell?"

"This is she," I answered.

"Hello, this is the American consulate."

"Oh, hello." My voice perking up.

"We have been reviewing your visa application and you are requesting to go back home for a few weeks next month. Is this correct?"

"Yes, it is." I could feel the nerves in my stomach begin to build. It was always nerve wracking when it came to visa's and what not.

"It says here that you are wanting to go home for your sister's graduation. Is this correct?"

"Yes."

"Now, were you planning on going back home for Christmas?"

"I was hoping to, yes."

There was silence on the other end, the only sound is the typing of keys. I waited patiently as the woman on the other end typed away. "We seemed to be having some difficulties processing your visa for next month." She said. My stomach dropped. "It seems as if you will not be able to go back next month if you are wanting to come back to the United Kingdom and leave once again in December. You have a visiting visa. Now, are you working?"

I could feel my heart speeding up, anxiety growing with each breath that I took. My hand was fiddling with the napkin laying beside me. Harry looked up at me, his brows scrunched together. He mouthed, "Is everything okay?" I shook my head, trying to listen to the lady on the other line. "Yes, I am working."

"Alright," more typing. "I would suggest you come down to the American Embassy as soon as you can so that you can apply for a working visa. That will extend your stay in the country and allow you to be able to fly to America for December and come back."

"What about next month?" I ask with fingers crossed.

"There are no guarantees that you will have it processed by next month. I'm sorry, but please come down and we can get this all sorted."

I let out a long sigh, "Alright, thank you. I will be there in the next hour."

"Thank you, Isabella."

I ended the call, dropping my phone on the table. I groaned while bringing my hands to my forehead. "What's wrong Iz?" Harry's voice startling me out of my growing funk.

"That was the American consulate. They're having some troubles with my visa."

"Fuck," he breathed. "Do you need me to drive you down to the Embassy?" He offered.

"No, I texted Chase but he's not responding. I'll just call him. Thanks though."

Harry pulled out his wallet, leaving a few notes on the table. "Come on, let's go."

"No, it's fine". I argued, pulling my phone out once again to call Chase.

"I'm here right now. Why call him and wait for him to get over here when I can drive you now."

I didn't bother to argue, muttering a small thank you following him out of the door and towards his car. "I appreciate this, Harry."

Harry chuckled and shook his head at me, "It's not a big deal, Isabella. I don't want you getting kicked out of the country or some shit." I grimaced, not wanting to get kicked out of the country. That was the last thing that I needed right now.

The drive to the consulate was quicker than I expected. After a half hour, we pulled out in front of a large building, donning a few American flags. We walked up the daunting steps towards the large front entrance. I looked at Harry as we entered the lobby. "You can wait here, I'll be back."

"Are you sure?" He asked, his eyes clouded with concern.

"Yes, I am." I placed my hand gently on his arm giving him a look of reassurance.

"Alright," He stuffed his hands into his front pockets. "I'll just wait here." He nodded his head towards a wooden bench.

"Okay." I smiled at him once more, thankful that he was here.

-

The air seemed fresh as I breathed it in. It was a stark contrast to the stuffy air that filled the consulate. I was so thankful to be out of there, two hours later. I felt terrible for leaving Harry to wait outside for so long. He reassured me that it was no big deal and that he had a book in his back pocket, and that he was too busy reading to really notice how long I had been.

"Did you get everything sorted out?" He asked while we walked over to his car. He opened the door for me, something that I was still surprised over. Chase had never opened the door for me once. I forgot what it felt like to have a man open the door to his car for me. I guess chivalry wasn't dead. At least not yet.

"I don't know," I muttered as we sat in the car. His hand on the ignition, his eyes focused on me. "I can't go home next month which absolutely sucks." I had almost broke down in the office when the burly man with the prominent and bushy mustache broke the news to me. I had made a promise to Natalie before I left for London that I would be home to watch her graduate in August. I broke that promise. I wasn't going to be home and that hurt. It hurt a lot.

"Why were you going to go home?" He asked as we began to drive back towards my apartment.

"I promised my sister that I was going to be home to watch her graduate from high school. But now, that won't be happening thanks to the stupid visa system."

"That's fucked. There's no way that they can make it happen?"

"Nope."

"Bullshit." He glanced over at me, his eyes sympathetic. "I'm sorry Iz. That sucks."

"I know. It's okay. Thank you."

Without giving me a second warning, Harry made a sharp right turn. I let out a small scream, completely startled. He chuckled to himself as he continued to drive fast down the deserted road. "Where are you going? My apartment is the other way."

"I'm taking you somewhere."

"Are you going to tell me where?"

"Nope." He smirked.

"Harry," I warned. I sat up, holding on to the side of the car as he drove quickly and made another sharp turn. "At least slow down."

"Where's the adventure in that?" He winked at me. Of course. Adventure. I had forgotten all about that.

"Right," I laughed while subtly making sure my seat belt was locked in. It was. Thankfully.

We continued down the long path towards a deserted area of town. It was lined with brick buildings and large trees. It was beautiful. Picturesque in a way. "Are we even in London anymore?" I joked.

"No, we're outside of the city. Don't worry, we're almost there." He drove for a few more minutes until we pulled up in front of an apartment building. The exterior was a deep red brick, the windows were white panelling. It looked a bit run down but easily loved. Harry turned the car off, taking his keys out of the ignition. He opened the door to his car. I followed suit, meeting him on the sidewalk. He nodded his head towards the front door. "This way."

We walked up the walkway towards the door. He grabbed a key out of his back pocket and opened the door. We made our way through the lobby and went up the elevator to the second floor. We walked out and down the hall to the last door to the right. He opened the door to a small apartment.

It was pretty empty, minus the small chair and coffee table. There was a door on the far left side of the one room. Most likely the bedroom. "What is this?"

"It's an apartment, Isabella." He chuckled. Harry threw the keys on top of the kitchen counter. The counter was bare with the exception of a single mug and kettle.

"Who's place is this?" I asked. Harry walked towards the chair that sat in the middle of the living room and sat down. I walked over to him and awkwardly stood beside the chair. He chuckled, pulling me so that I was sitting on his lap. "Harry," I warned pulling his arms off of me, sliding off his lap and sat down on the ground.

"It's a friend of mine's."

"You have friends?" I asked jokingly. Harry rolled his eyes at me and smirked.

"Ha-ha." He stood up and pulled my hand so that I was now standing with him. He walked over to the other room, opening up the door. Inside was a mattress that laid on the ground and against the window. He led us, his hand still wrapped securely around my wrist, and towards the mattress. He sat down, pulling me down with him. "A friend of mine from Manchester lives here, but he's going to be moving back home next month and is going to sell me the place. It's nothing much but it doesn't suck."

"I like it! It's cozy. Well, it could use a good paint job and maybe more furniture," I laughed, "But it's nice! You don't need a massive apartment. Sometimes, those are less homely. Small apartments are usually the best places to live."

Harry looked at me, his eyes boring into my own. I suddenly felt insecure. The way that he looked at me, made me feel like he was looking into my soul. Seeing ever inch of me, studying me. Yet, at the same time, I felt like the most interesting person in the world by the way that he looked at me.

"What?" I laughed awkwardly, pulling a hand through my hair.

"Nothing," He said, his bottom lip getting engulfed by his teeth. He bit down on his lip, his eyes still staring at me. "You're just pretty, that's all."

I felt my cheeks burn at his small confession. Friends? You guys suck at being friends. You have a boyfriend. Don't be a cheat. I ignored my subconscious, getting tired of her bringing up the just friends thing. I knew we were friends, Harry knew we were friends. He was just a flirt. That was all. It was in his nature, his character. Is it? Or do you think maybe he likes you. I mentally scoffed at that thought. He had already made it clear that he didn't do feelings. Yet regardless of that, I still felt butterflies at his small compliment.

"Thanks," I muttered, looking down at my hands. Harry laid back on the mattress, one hand behind his head and another on his chest. Without giving it a second thought, I laid down beside him, making sure to leave distance between us.

"I like it here. It's quiet." He spoke, breaking the silence between us. I turned my head so that I was looking at him. His face was still looking straight above him, his eyes not looking at me. He was still biting down on his lip, concentrating on whatever it was that he was thinking about.

"Me too." I said back. I liked how easy it was being here with Harry. It was different than being in Chase's luxurious flat. It reminded me of everything that I wanted in life. Everything that I liked. It reminded me of what I longed for. He turned his head, smiling at me softly. "Harry?"

"Yeah."

"Why are you nice to me? You didn't have to drive me. I texted Chase, he could have done it." I mentally cringed at the cliche question.

"I told you," he whispered. "You intrigue me."

"But, Chase..." I cringed once again at that. Really Iz? You're going to bring that up again?

Harry laughed. "So?"

"I just - I don't - never mind." I stuttered. What was wrong with me?

"Do you like me Isabella?" He asked, his voice serious. The rasp of it sending a chill down my spine. I sat up and looked at him, eyes wide.

"What?" My eyes widened, completely startled by his question. "No."

"Then why do you always bring up that you have a boyfriend?" He challenged. "If you didn't like me, then you don't need to constantly remind yourself that you have a boyfriend and that we're just friends."

I rolled my eyes. "I don't want you to like me. I'm reminding you." I argued back.

"I don't like you." He said, pulling me back down so that I was laying beside him once again.

"And I don't like you." I weakly argued. I suddenly felt my breath hitch in my throat at the close proximity of our bodies.

"Just friends." He whispered, his eyes focusing on my lips and back to my eyes and down to my lips. He moved closer to me.

"Just friends." I whispered back, my eyes not once leaving his lips. My breath hitching in my throat.

"No feelings." Harry whispered, his hand wrapping around my waist, holding onto my hips, and pulling me closer to his body.

"No feelings." My heart began to thump erratically in my chest. I could feel his hands slide under my shirt, the heat of his palms sending a chill down my spine.

"Chase is your boyfriend." His breath touched my lips, the aroma of mint and nicotine taking over my senses. Clouding my mind.

"I have a boyfriend." I whispered. Harry's lips moved closer to mine, inches away from touching my own.