A/N I updated my kotlc club.

Sophie was nervous as she got ready for school that morning. She hadn't slept all night, worried about how to act around her friends and... Keefe. They hadn't talked about what they were going to do, but Sophie wasn't quite ready to show up kissing him. Especially since most of her friends didn't know she'd broken up with Fitz... who had mostly avoided her since school started. She decided she needed to hail him and straighten a couple things out before school.

She decided to hail instead of transmit, because she was sure Biana would eavesdrop, and the word would get around more quickly.

"Hey, Fitz? I think we need to talk." She said when he picked up.

"Sure, what's up?" He replied, a little confused.

"About... us. Or really... not us. And how to act. Have you... told anyone? People are... wondering. About why we don't really talk or hang out anymore. I think it's time to make it public." She blurted awkwardly.

"Umm..." Fitz mumbled, looking a little hurt. "I guess... if that's what you want..."

"We agreed, remember? We work better as friends. Best friends."

"Isn't that what you said to Dex?"

"I can have several best friends. I do have several best friends. But... not a boyfriend. Yet." She regretted adding the last words when she saw a flicker of hope in Fitz's beautiful teal eyes. "Look, Fitz... I have to go. Finish getting ready for school. See you later." And she hung up quickly, collapsing onto her bed. That had gone... badly. She had told Fitz before that she wasn't ready for a boyfriend... and the only reason she was making it public was that she had a new one. She felt like a terrible person. Sophe rolled onto her stomach and started to cry, mentally yelling at herself for being so cruel and quick to find a new boyfriend. She never should've let him kiss her.

So that's how she was when Keefe walked into her room half an hour later.

"Figured I'd find you like this."

"What are you doing here, Keefe?" Sophie groaned without looking up.

"You didn't show up at school, and I knew you weren't sick. Well, not physically." He grinned at his own joke, but the smirk fell off his face when he took a closer look at her.

"What's wrong, Foster? Don't tell me you regret..." he hesitated. "Coming." He finished lamely.

"I never should have done that. Fitz and I aren't even publically broken up. I broke up with him because I wasn't ready for a boyfriend. I am a terrible person to go straight over to you. I never should've kissed you. I... shouldn't be as in love with you as I am."

Keefe didn't speak for a long time. Eventually, he sat on the bed next to her- but keeping a couple feet distance. Sophie stayed facedown.

"Listen to me," he said softly. "This is not your fault. It's mine. I... I'm the one who started all this. I've just loved you for so long... after you and Fitz broke up... I thought I saw a perfect opportunity. It was stupid of me and... I'm sorry. If you want to end it right now... I'll go away. I will. Until... I don't know. As long as you want me to. Maybe... maybe forever. If that's what you want.

"Keefe!" Sophie said, sitting up. "This is not about what I want! Didn't you hear me? I'm in love with you. If I could be your girlfriend... but I can't. Don't you see why I can't? Fitz..." and her voice broke off into a sob. After a minute, Keefe scooched closer to her and rubbed her back while she cried. Eventually, she continued.

"Fitz... would be so mad. At me. At you. And he has every right to!"

"Okay, first of all-" Keefe broke in. "Fitz has no right to be mad. You weren't ready for a boyfriend- you had a lot going on. If you are now, and pick someone else, that's none of his business. Second of all, I can take whatever he throws at me. I've done it before."

"And I've done it too many times! I... I can't do that again. If I have to listen to the things he yells when he's mad again... you weren't there that night."

"I wasn't. But I felt all of your emotions the day you went into Loamnore- you were a mess. I almost told Sandor and told him to make you stay home. If you were even half that upset when it happened..."

"You have no idea. I sat out there underneath the Panakes tree for hours until Edaline came out. I wasn't even crying. I don't know what I was doing. I just... blanked out. And I can't do that again. Fitz has officially broken your record for how many times he's sent me home sobbing in a heap, my heart breaking into a million pieces. And... I can't do it again."

"So what do you want?" he asked calmly.

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT! Everything I try to do turns out wrong!" she screamed.

"Hey, hey, calm down. It's going to be okay."

"DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN. Maybe things will be okay eventually, but I can't deal with it as it is! I know it seems silly and babyish and weak, but-"

"I'm gonna stop you right there. You have had so many awful things happen to you, nothing you say will ever make me think you are silly or babyish or weak. You are the smartest, most powerful, most amazing, most beautiful elf in the history of the universe. Quit crying! You're supposed to cry when good things happen, Foster, not bad ones."

"I know, I know, it's just..." Sophie was mostly thinking of when Fitz had said something nearly identical under the Panakes tree... but she wasn't about to say that to Keefe. So she went with something even more upsetting.

"This is a bad thing, don't you see? You're just making me fall more and more in love with you! I shouldn't love you. I shouldn't want you to hold me and kiss me and tell me it's all okay. Because it isn't okay! You shouldn't even be here! I need you... I don't know what I need. I just don't know what to do." And she broke off into a sob, curling her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around them.

Keefe hesitated, looking like he wanted to move closer and hug her. And Sophie... wanted him to do it.

"Look. I can feel that you are overwhelmed and upset, and I get that, but mostly I feel guilt. Please be careful. You aren't responsible for something that Fitz said, or something that you did in the heat of the moment. I told you it was my fault for moving so quickly. And you are not a terrible person because you fell in love. If you were, I'd have been a terrible person since I met you."

At any other time, Sophie would've latched onto that statement- did he mean he'd loved her since they met all those years ago? But now, Sophie was focused on one thing.

"I called Fitz this morning. Before you got here." she blurted out. Keefe stiffened, and Sophie hurried to finish.

"I told him that... it was time to make the breakup public. A bunch of our friends don't know- but they probably suspect, given how we've been avoiding each other at school. I basically told him that we were better as friends- again- and then blurted something like 'I have lots of friends, but not a boyfriend- yet.' And I think I gave the wrong impression, and-" she trailed off. This is all so confusing." She looked up at him. "If there was a way to make all of this... history... disappear, so it could just be you and me? I'd do it in a second. But there isn't. And... I'm scared, Keefe."

"Scared of what? Fitz? What people might think?"

"Fitz. How angry he's going to be. Being seen as a horrible person. But mostly... if I stay any longer with you, here... I might do something, dive into an ocean that I won't be able to make it out of."

"Yeah? What would you do?"

"This." And she leaned towards him, reaching up to run her fingers through his adorable hair before she crossed the distance that had grown between them and kissed him. Not a long kiss, but it was still the most important one they'd shared.

"So... is that your decision?" He asked with his smirk returning. "Cuz it seems like a decision."

Sophie laughed ruefully. "I guess it is. Now you get out of here so I can go finish getting ready for school. It's nearly lunchtime."

"Yes ma'am, Lady Fosboss. Uh... I'll be here. We can leap back together. Next class is group P.E."

"Fine." And she laughed, getting up. As she splashed some water on her face to make it less obvious she'd been crying, Keefe spoke again.

"Umm... so... what are we going to do at school?"

And there it was. The question that could ruin everything- or make it the best day of her life.

"Let's... ease into it. Sit together for the end of lunch- and study hall- but let's hold off on all the kissing"

"Hmm... I'm not sure I can promise that."

Sophie laughed, and finished pinning her cape to her uniform. She slipped into the bathroom and applied a tiny bit of makeup- telling herself it was to hide her red eyes and blotchy cheeks.

"Woah." Keefe said, taking a look at her when she came back into her bedroom.

"Too much? I looked like a disaster after all that crying, so I might have gone overboard." she started to turn back to the bathroom.

"No, no. Sorry." He said, catching up with her and grabbing her arm to stop her. "You look... awesome. Not that you weren't awesome before, but..."

Sophie giggled, blushing. "No one looks awesome after sobbing for hours."

"You pulled it off. But this-" he said, motioning to her face, "is pretty great too." He pulled her towards him and kissed her. Sophie pulled away laughing. "Keefe! Now you have lip gloss on you!"

"Suits me, doesn't it?" He said, striking a ridiculous pose. "Besides, if I'm not allowed to kiss you at school..." He stepped back over to her, leaning over so their foreheads touched.

"I suppose that's only fair," whispered Sophie, letting him kiss her. All her worries about Fitz and school and how to act floated away. All Sophie knew was that she never wanted this kiss to end.

After several minutes, though, Sophie jolted up suddenly, looking at her watch.

"Now we've missed lunch completely! We'll be late for P.E. if we don't get moving."

"Worth it," Keefe decided, sneaking in one more kiss before letting her go. Sophie quickly reapplied her lip gloss, giggling as she wiped the smudges of sparkle off Keefe's lips with her thumb.

"Where are Grady and Edaline?" Sophie asked as they ran up the stairs to the Leapmaster.

"They left a note for you downstairs. Visiting Alden for business till 1."

"That's now! We'd better hurry before they catch us still here."

"Agreed." And they ran even faster, arriving out of breath to the Leapmaster.

"Foxfire!" Keefe called, setting the crystals moving. They tightened their grips on each others' hands as they stepped into the light, determined to face their friends together.